The Referral Reverberation
by katladyd
Summary: Sheldon is not playing well with others and Cal Tech has informed him he must be examined and treated by their head neurobiologist, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, or lose his job permanently. Amy is in charge and Sheldon has to be subservient. Can he do it?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One: Prelude

 **What if Amy and Sheldon had met under a different set of circumstances where Amy was in charge and Sheldon the subservient party? The results would lead to significant frustration and angst for both of them…and mass hilarity for the rest of us. I don't own one little bit of TBBT. Not a bit. I just have fun with the characters.**

 **Prelude - Amy**

You know how they say, "Be careful of what you wish for, you just might get it"? Yeah, that's my story and I'm going to tell it to you now. My name is Amy Farrah Fowler, and it went down like this:

It was a typical Thursday morning in my lab. In other words, it was boring. I had been forced to face some hard facts that day, namely that my entire life was boring. Driving to work that day, I came to the realization that at age thirty, I had never had a boyfriend, a bff, or even a guy friend, unless you counted Bert from the Geology Department and _I_ sure didn't. Sometimes he liked to give others the impression we were dating, but nothing could have been further from the truth. I mean I liked Bert, he was a nice guy and everything, and he even thought I was pretty, but, yeah, no attraction on my part. I was hard put to even accept lunch dates with him to the cafeteria at work. Yeah, _that_ not turned on by the guy.

Anyway, as I was saying, that Thursday morning I accepted the fact that my life was boring. Heck, _I_ was boring! That kind of lent itself to the no boyfriend, no bff, no guy friend thing, you know? And it wasn't because I was a loser or anything. I had, and still have, a pretty sweet job as a neurobiologist at Cal Tech, that little fact definitely put me in the upper 1% in the Cool Job Derby. I was also pretty intelligent, still am for that matter. My IQ was over 170. For those of you who don't keep up with that kind of stuff, that's pretty much genius level. Still, I didn't seem to have what guys wanted, I mean, compared to the 'popular girls' at any institution. You know who I'm talking about, the ones that all the cool guys date. It's pretty obvious who I mean, and that particular group did _not_ include me. I was different. They listened to rock and rap; I played golden oldies on my harp. Yeah, you heard me, my harp. I love the harp, don't get me wrong, but playing one sure didn't make me a guy magnet; let me set you straight on that. Whatever, you probably already knew that. You'll have to excuse me; sometimes my social isolation makes me seem a bit out of it.

Anyway, more about me. One reason I considered myself guy repellent was because I wore glasses. Not those cute trendy ones, either. Serious, science lady glasses. Sturdy rimmed, tortoiseshell ones that made me look even more serious and nerdy than I really was, if that was possible. Why didn't I change my style you ask? I don't know, maybe I liked looking all bookish and serious. That's the true me, actually. I hated anything fake; still do, so I guess my glasses were staying the way they were. Now, on to my clothes. I didn't wear the low cut tops or skinny jeans with boots that all the females around here wore. I just wasn't comfortable showing that much skin or advertising my shape, to be honest with you. I got that attitude from my mother, but that's a long story I don't feel like going into here. Let's just say I was fairly conservative and my clothes always reflected that. I always wore straight skirts with tights and orthopedic shoes. Yeah, that's right, orthopedic shoes. I also favored plaids and stripes. Are you hot yet? I paired my skirts with long sleeved blouses topped by cardigans. On special occasions, I ditched the skirt and paired the cardigan with a floral dress designed in the '50s. Your grandmother would have thought I dressed very well. Anyway, I liked my style; I just didn't like being a loner. But that was all about to change in a big way.

I had gone to the mailbox that morning to check for any messages from the University Administration Office, they like you to keep current with that and I always followed the rules. See where I'm going with this? I opened one of the envelopes, knowing full well what I would find. Some months earlier, the President of the college, Dr. Siebert (don't get me started on that guy!) had offered me a way to make a little extra money on the side. Hey, who doesn't like a little extra cash? Momma needs a new pair of orthopedic shoes, if you know what I mean. Anyway, he asked me if I would be willing to do some brain scanning and amateur therapy on some nut cases from the college who had tenure or were well known in the academic community. You know how it goes; they couldn't fire these wackadoodles without it being taken to court and splashed all over the news. That would have been bad publicity for the school. These weren't lowly adjunct professors, either, let me tell you that. Anyway, I hadn't seen any harm in doing a little work on the side so I, of course, said I would. They knew I wouldn't tell anyone anything. Who was I going to blab to, my shadow?

In the ensuing months I had diagnosed and treated a man with kleptomania, one woman with an unhealthy sexual attachment to her toothbrush (I kid you not. She even named the damn thing!), and an elderly professor emeritus who enjoyed sending pictures of his genitalia to female underclassmen on Instagram. Yeah, _that_ was an interesting one! Anyway, I helped these poor souls with their 'problems' and got them back to as close to normal as they were ever going to be. I'm not sure what helped me in these endeavors more, my Doctorate in Neurobiology or my Masters in Psych. Anyway, when it had to be done on the QT, I was their go-to girl. I was pretty good at it, if I do say so myself. So, on this typical morning that would not stay typical, I opened yet another plain, brown envelope and just as I had expected, they had a side job for me.

 **Prelude - Sheldon**

I am not crazy! My mother had me tested. How many times did I have to tell that simpleton, Siebert, that I was not in need of any mental health evaluations? My protests had done me little good. And that is how I got myself into the situation I'm in today. Siebert had felt justified in referring me to their in-house therapist and neurobiologist for a little brain scan and fine tuning. Good Lord, did I look like a madman? My only problem was that I was intensely frustrated. You would have been, also, if you had been forced to take a pause in your research to teach an applied physics class. TO UNDERCLASSMEN! Try finding a working brain among that bunch! Not an easy task let me tell you. All the male students were Neanderthal young men with their pants close to falling down to their ankles and whatever minds they possessed focused on nothing but coitus and the imbibing of alcoholic beverages. And added to that, I had to wet-nurse their female counterparts as well, who had nothing on their minds but the Kardashians and the mall, in that order. That was a particularly gruesome level of Hell, let me tell you. And then for Siebert to think there was something wrong with _my_ brain? Ridiculous.

Anyway, I was put on administrative leave until I would be given a clean bill of mental health by the little tart that ran their neurobiology department, one Dr. Fowler. I hadn't known her personally, but I wouldn't have put it past Siebert to send me to someone he was sleeping with, just because it saved the school some money. A sacrilege, that's what it was, a sacrilege! I was their head theoretical physicist, and I had been reduced to helping a group of simpletons pass a basic physics class. The ignominy of it all still burns.

I do have my pride and my angst will be quite understandable once I explain to you exactly who and what I am and how I got there. Simply put, I am one of the finest scientific minds, if not _the_ finest scientific mind, in all of North America. Or quite possibly, the world. After all, I was a certified child prodigy. I entered college at the age of eleven, graduated summa cum laude at the age of fourteen. I was also the youngest person in history to receive the Stevenson Award, being awarded that at fourteen, also. I earned my first doctorate when I was sixteen and my second when I was twenty. Somewhere in the middle of all that I also accepted a position as a visiting professor at the University of Heidelberg. I had even won Caltech's Chancellor's Award for Science and with my good friend, Leonard Hofstadter; I had published a paper comparing the universe to the surface of an Nth dimension sphere. That one received much critical acclaim and Leonard and I lectured on it for quite some time. That had been a nice feather in the professional cap for both of us. After that, Leonard and I wrote another paper that determined that space time contained the same properties as a super-fluid. That paper was endorsed by none other than Stephen Hawking.

So, as you can plainly see, I was quite accomplished and deserved much better respect and treatment than being sent to see some neuronut who was one step away from practicing soft science. What had I done to deserve this treatment? Nothing that I could see, but Dr. Siebert came up with the excuse that I had problems relating to people. That was a problem? They couldn't relate to me, either, and I didn't see him handing them an appointment slip to get their brains analyzed. He kept telling me that I was alienating my students and colleagues to some great degree. That was pure hokum! They were the ones alienating me! At that point, I really wished I could have retired from the human race permanently. But that would have meant giving up my research position and that was unthinkable! My life was research, which it still is. So, there I was, making my way to the lab of some hippy dippy brain therapist. Oh, the things I did for science!

 **How will these two hit it off? Will Sheldon be agreeable to working with Amy or will he be his usual self?**


	2. Chapter 2: Striking a Deal

Chapter 2: Striking a Deal

 **Sheldon meets Amy and vice versa. Will either of them be impressed?**

When I had reached my lab, I opened the envelope and found the following message from Dr. Siebert:

 _My dear Dr. Fowler, at 11:00 a.m. this morning, a valued member of our Physics Department will be paying you a visit. His name is Dr. Sheldon Cooper and frankly, we have been very concerned about his mental health for the last six months. With both colleagues and students he has adopted an even greater condescending attitude than what he has used before, which was bad enough, believe me. He now snaps at his fellow researchers, argues with fellow professors, and makes it a point to degrade and humiliate his students. Frankly, it has taken all my powers of persuasion to prevent a lawsuit from some of them. He has one particular student who has felt the furthest extent of his vitriol. This student, one Madison Jessup, has been having trouble keeping up in Dr. Cooper's class. Being a diligent student, she asked for help during class time and was met with the following response: "If you would think of opening your textbook as often as you apparently open your legs, you might be passing this class!"_

 _Dr. Fowler, Dr. Cooper has always been a valuable component of our science program here at Cal Tech. See what you can do with him, we'd love to have him back in a more suitable frame of mind. This one may be the most trying and difficult assignment I have given you, so the rewards if you succeed will be much richer for you._

 _Good luck and may God Bless your efforts._

 _Sincerely,_

 _Dr. J. Siebert_

Okay, I had seen where Dr. Siebert had been coming from, sort of. As far as the verbal exchange Dr. Cooper had with Ms. Jessup, I had rather understood that one. I had seen firsthand the actions and character of many of the undergraduates at this university and truthfully, I almost agreed with Dr. Cooper's summation of her problem. But that had nothing to do with my assignment. I was to return Dr. Cooper to the Physics Department in a more malleable state of mind than what he currently possessed. After dealing with the Instagram pervert, I had fully believed this one would be a piece of cake for me. As it turned out, I could not have been more wrong!

At precisely eleven a.m., a unique knock came on my door. _*knock, knock, knock, Dr. Fowler? *knock, knock, knock, Dr. Fowler? *knock, knock, knock, Dr. Fowler?_

Okay, that one had shaken me a bit. Who the hell would knock three times at someone's door? I began to have serious doubts about this assignment. I soon felt better about everything, though. When I got around to opening the door, I saw a tall, serious looking man who seemed extremely intent on something or other. All the earmarks of a serious scientist. I had found myself wondering why Siebert had sent him to me. Maybe all this one needed was a vacation. Outside of his unique door knocking technique, I had observed nothing 'off' about him. His appearance had led me to believe that the popular phrases 'sup?' and 'dude' had never emanated from his lips. In spite of Siebert's letter, I found myself admiring that mindset. That was my first mistake.

As I made my way down the hall of the neurobiology department, I found my distaste for this situation rising. I had fully believed I would find Dr. Fowler to most likely be some bleached blonde bimbo who had gotten her position through carnal manipulation. When she finally opened the door, I had found myself surprised to see that Dr. Fowler actually resembled a serious scientist, and a most sober one at that. I could never have imagined her mouth emitting the girlish, empty-headed giggles and senseless prattle that I had grown so weary of. Nevertheless, I knew she was one of Siebert's minions and as that, had no right whatsoever to anything but my disdain. I did not smile in response to her greeting, my utter contempt kept me from exhibiting the accepted social protocol. Instead, I had given her a most guarded greeting.

My greeting to him was crisp and terse, "Good morning, Dr. Cooper. I've been expecting you. Your punctuality is much appreciated."

He answered me in a most minimal manner, "Good morning, Dr. Fowler. Punctuality is one of my strong points. It is a most admirable quality."

I had liked his no nonsense attitude and quickly responded, "Agreed. Won't you come in and we can discuss why you are here." Without a word, Dr. Cooper entered my lab and took a seat by the dissecting table. _How apropos_ , I had thought to myself. I remember studying him in much the same way I studied my lab monkeys, thoroughly and with a strong sense of detachment. Dr. Cooper possessed large blue eyes, which lacked any expression other than thinly veiled contempt. I found that fascinating. I had always viewed most of my fellow human beings in much the same way. He presented himself as tall, without being ridiculously so. I imagined him to be slightly over six feet tall. He seemed to carry no excess flesh on his bones; slender appeared to be the correct term for him. I had found him not unpleasant to look at, but at the same time, he called forth no strong reactions in me, either.

I remember that I proceeded to take a seat on a stool next to a high table in her lab. There had been a more traditional table and chair set in the room, but I felt it best to avoid any seat situation which might lend itself to a perceived sense of intimacy. Dr. Fowler began what seemed to me to be an intense scrutiny of my person. I had found this most disconcerting. Up to that moment in my life, I had neither invited, nor tolerated, much female attention in my life. That sort of thing always interfered with scientific thought and research. Oh, I had known that Dr. Einstein and Dr. Hawking were married, but I had personally never felt the 'urge to merge'. The very idea had always been extremely off-putting to me. From the look of the woman across the table from me, she had felt much the same way. Aside from her being female, it wasn't too unnerving an experience. Unlike most people, I have never minded one little bit being examined like a lab specimen. When you get down to it, life is one big science lab, is it not?

One of us had to eventually break the silence and speak, so I decided to take one for the team. "Dr. Cooper, I'm sure you know why you are here."

His reply had been cold and factual, "Dr. Siebert required this as a condition for my returning to work. No matter how inane I feel the process actually is."

That had been both an interesting and an honest reply, so I responded with, "So you are willing to follow my protocol?"

He had risen from his stool and resolutely headed for the door, "Good lord no! Willing? Surely you jest. No, Dr. Fowler, I am not willing to follow your protocol. Good day."

For the first time that day, a smile had graced my face; I have always loved the feeling of power, especially over someone so unwilling to surrender his to mine. I remember calling after him, "Fine, Dr. Cooper. You may leave if you wish. But remember, you may not return to work until I give Dr. Siebert the go ahead."

 _That_ had gotten to him, all right. His mouth had flown open as had his eyes. However, being the highly intelligent man that he was, he had realized the truth behind my words and reluctantly returned to sit across the dissection table at me. _This,_ I had thought, _was going to be fun._ I had no idea at the time how naïve my thoughts had been.

I turned and reentered her lab after being fully prepared to leave. The woman had made her point in a most logical fashion and I have always succumbed to pure logic. Did I enjoy her calling the shots? Of course not, but the truth was there for both of us to see; if I wanted to return to my position of lead theoretical physicist at Cal Tech, I had to go along with whatever this woman deemed necessary. As I had surmised she was a professional of above average intelligence, that prospect did not terrify me. It annoyed me, perhaps, but I felt this woman was one who let logic dictate her actions before any sort of personal feelings. I could live with that, and seeing as I had no choice in the matter, I decided to cooperate. I sat back down on the proffered stool and inquired of her, "How are we going to proceed with this evaluation of my brain? I must warn you, prepare yourself to be amazed." Warning the woman of my intellectual superiority seemed like the correct thing to do. I felt impressing her with my amazing intelligence would work in my favor. I wanted to get on this woman's good side. Returning to my official position had been my goal and I reasoned to myself thatmaybe if I played along with Dr. Fowler, I would be safely ensconced in my office within the week.

When Dr. Cooper returned to his seat, he asked me how his evaluation was to be carried out. He seemed more curious than upset and that pleased me. I quickly dismissed his braggadocio concerning his intellect. I had been told through the university grapevine that Dr. Cooper was a certified genius. A tad strange, but still, brilliant. I have to admit to you here that I had found myself very much looking forward to investigating how his brain functioned. I'm a neurobiologist by trade and brains are my thing. That's how I roll.

I explained to him how I was going to investigate his brain function, "Dr. Cooper, to explore the workings of your brain, I will be using my preferred method, MEG." He gave a most interested look and nodded approvingly. I had to ask him, "You do know what MEG is, do you not?"

I could not believe Dr. Fowler had grossly underestimated my breadth of knowledge! I had answered her tartly, "Of course I know what MEG is. I'm a physicist. I know everything there is to know in the universe! MEG stands for Magnetoencephalography. You will be mapping my brain activity by recording the magnetic fields produced by the electrical currents that happen in my brain when I am exposed to different forms of stimuli. I should prepare for this procedure by not using any hair products the morning of the scan nor should I wear anything metal on my body. Do you have access to an MEG Room and Scanner?" I had to ask her the last part. I suppose I insulted her professional integrity somewhat by inquiring as to whether her department possessed that equipment, but she had had the nerve to question whether I knew what a MEG was. The look on her face when I threw that one at her told me that my arrow had hit its mark.

Pompous. That was the first word that entered my mind when Dr. Cooper inquired as to whether we had an MEG Room and Scanner. The man must have known full well that as a neurobiologist working at a prestigious university, I would not have suggested such a protocol if I had not had easy access to the equipment. That would have been like me asking him if he had access to a linear accelerator. If he had been trying to rattle me he had failed miserably. However, that didn't mean his comment did not annoy the hell out of me. I found that day that the longer I conversed with Dr. Cooper, the more annoying he became. I had begun to see why Dr. Siebert had received complaints about his attitude. Still, I had kept my cool and reassured him that, yes; I had full access to whatever was needed for this scan. Taking a deep breath, I set an appointment for his MEG for eleven o'clock the next morning and reminded him of what he already knew: to not use any products such as hair spray or gel in his hair and to have no metal whatsoever on his body. After bidding him good day, I closed the door behind me and exhaled in relief. The simplest conversation with the man was extremely taxing; I could not imagine having to take a class with him as the professor. Thank goodness I only had to see him on a professional level where I was in charge. How complex could that be, right? I was soon to find out.

I had left Dr. Fowler's office in good spirits. I was actually looking forward to having my brain activity scanned, I always had. Besides, once this woman had realized the full extent of my intellectual superiority, we would revert back to the proper order of things, her being subservient to the will of Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper. That meeting had ended on a positive note for me and I found myself whistling as I headed down the hall. I had no idea of the mental mayhem that was to come.

 **This might get good, in a strange sort of way. Rather like the Clash of the Mental Titans. Let the brain scans begin!**

At precisely eleven a.m. the next morning, I was treated to Dr. Cooper's unique triad knock. I responded with a hearty, "Please come in, Dr. Cooper!" No use scaring my vic, uh, subject away. Like I said, Momma needs a new pair of orthopedic shoes, and those things cost. Dr. Cooper entered and leveled a challenging look at me, which I had calmly ignored. People like him were like wild animals, you NEVER showed your fear.

He had wasted no time in asking, "Well, are you going to take me to the MEG Room?" as if yesterday had all been a lie and he was looking to catch me up in it.

I then decided to placate him instead of challenging him, "Relax, Dr. Actus is using it now. He should be out of there in a few minutes and then we'll proceed to scan that precious commodity you call your brain." I smiled at the end of that missive, hoping to lighten the mood a bit.

His next question was delivered in a staccato voice, "Is he a neurobiologist? I thought there was only one in this department, and that would be you."

I had shaken my head and patiently explained to him, "No, he's an OBGYN. He just has an expectant mother with eipilepsy. He wants to figure out how to control her seizures. And for your information, Dr. Cooper, there are several neurobiologists in this department, much as there are several physicists in yours. "

Dr. Cooper took the same seat as the day before and fired another pointed question my way. The man was a human verbal cannon, "Does he know how to use the machine? He's not from this department."

I had thought for a moment and then made the decision that flattery was the quickest way to compliance with this one, "You know how to use it and you're not from this department, either. I'm willing to bet your expertise goes far beyond the confines of physics."

I swear I actually saw his chest puff up, rather like a pigeon, "So true, but not everyone is me."

I then let him in on a little industry secret, hoping to forge a bond of some kind between us, "No, but most doctors in any discipline are familiar with how to use an MRI, a CAT Scan, or MEG to help diagnose their patients. But keep that information under your hat, okay?"

He nodded tersely and said, "Agreed. What do you hope to find when you check my grey matter?"

Aw, the subject was getting curious about the procedure! That was very good for me. So I then began to explain a few things to him, "Well, basically, I'm going to be looking at how your brain is working, or not, by charting its responses to different stimuli. But you already knew that."

He put his head up in an insolent manner and told me, "I don't want to do it."

I was floored. This man _was_ a head case. "I thought we went over this yesterday."

He had looked down at his phone, then up at me, and then replied in the same voice you would use when addressing a small child, "You misunderstood me. I didn't say I was refusing, I merely stated the fact that I don't want to do this."

I decided to fire some ammo of my own, "Scared?"

His eye had gone back to his phone, "No."

I crossed my arms over my chest and demanded, "What is it then?"

His question had come out like one of those 'Why' questions toddlers always ask. "How come we're not scanning _your_ brain?"

I walked over to him and stared him in the eyes, "Dr. Cooper, I'm not in trouble with my boss."

His grin had become Machiavellian, "What if I told him you made inappropriate advances towards me?"

I managed to suppress a laugh and had gone with the bare bones truth, "With your record and mine to go by, they'd laugh it off."

He next decided to try another tactic, kindness, "Dr. Fowler, I would feel much better if you had your brain analyzed as well as mine. It would be an honor to compare both of our brains' capacities."

I somehow managed to stand my ground. Male flattery was my kryptonite, but this time, I resisted its power, "No, Dr. Cooper. That is not going to happen."

A small grin appeared on his face and he asked me in a teasing voice, "Scared?"

That one caught me completely off guard and I replied to him, "Of what?" in a much higher tone of voice than usual, which gave away my uncertainty a bit.

Now the man was starting to get on my nerves. He gave me a smug look and threw this dart, "That we will find your brain far inferior to mine."

I had angrily slammed the folder containing his info down on the dissecting table, "That's ridiculous! I have a doctorate from Harvard! My brain is of the finest quality and it would compare well against yours."

At that point he challenged me with his arms folded across his chest and self certainty in his voice, "Prove it."

He had me and he knew it. I figured it might be fun to burst his pompous little bubble, in fact, I had found the idea rather titillating. So I replied with as much self assurance as Dr. Cooper, "Very well, I will. Ah, I see Dr. Actus leaving the MEG Room now. Let's get outta here and do the dirty deed. We will need about an hour each. As I am dressed in scrubs and don't wear jewelry or use any hair products, I am, as they say, good to go."

At that point an evil smirk had begun to spread across his face, "Dr. Fowler, are you trying to talk dirty to me?"

I grabbed his folder and headed for the door, eager to get this process started, "You wish, Dr. Cooper. I'm merely happy to be accepting your challenge."

"Fascinating. I suppose the only thing to do is proceed." Then he gave the strangest, snorting type of laugh I had ever heard. Oh, this one was going to be a bundle of fun. We left my lab and headed down the hall. This almost seemed like a duel from the Wild, Wild West.

I arrived at Dr. Fowler's lab at precisely eleven the next morning. I was not looking forward to giving both Dr. Siebert and Ms. Fowler what they wanted, but I have an IQ of 187 and I had come to the realization that I had little choice in the matter. Dr. Fowler had effusively greeted my knocking and invited me into her domain. I had immediately attempted to throw her off of her game by demanding of her whether we were now going to proceed to the MEG Room. There would be no idle chit chat or attempts at socialization on my watch. I wanted to firmly implant in Dr. Fowler's brain that all communication between us would be centered on my brain scans and my return to my rightful place as this university's most gifted physicist. Unfortunately, Dr. Fowler seemed unfazed by my actions. She affectively informed me that the room was being used and that we would have to wait for our turn. So cool was her delivery that I managed to give her a small smile at the end of her missive. I was still determined to put this woman on guard. She had to know she was dealing with her mental superior and it became my mission, since I was being forced to cooperate, to keep Dr. Fowler guessing and uneasy. I wanted, no, I needed, to be in charge of some area of this situation.

We ended up going back and forth about the procedure and the machine and who was capable of operating it and analyzing the results. I was rather tickled when Dr. Fowler admitted that I would know how to use this machine, even though I from a different field entirely. She shouldn't have been surprised, I am a physicist. It is our job to know everything in the universe. How else are we to make hypotheses as to how it works? Sometimes people, even fellow scientists, amaze me with their ignorance.

My aptitude for everything being settled, I proceeded to ask her and inane question. I actually lowered myself into inquiring what she was looking for in this procedure, even though I knew full well the answer. I was valiantly trying to make what some call 'small talk', please give me credit for that.

I then decided to have a little fun, can you blame me? I was stuck, against my own will I remind you, in a small lab with a woman who was sorely lacking in the humor department. I made mention of the fact that I did not want to take part in this endeavor. Can you blame me? This entire testing fiasco was not my idea to begin with; I was only complying to get my job back. I was surprised when Dr. Fowler took my statement as meaning I was not going to take part in this scanning circus, which was far from the truth. Okay, I made a mental note that she took my simplest utterances very seriously, indeed. I mentally licked my chops and feigned innocence and childlike petulance, I'm very good at that, and inquired of her why we were not scanning her brain. This was getting fun.

After some back and forth bickering, from which I emerged victorious, it was settled that we would both have our brain activity monitored by MEG and using the same stimuli. I have always found that if you challenge someone's assumed superiority they become putty in your hands. I could hardly wait for the brain beatdown to begin. When we saw the room was open, we hastened down the hall to begin The Best Brain Challenge, of which I was sure I would come out on the winning side. I had figured that as long as I had to be under Dr. Fowler's care, I might as well make it interesting.

Soon after we entered the MEG Room, I placed the electrodes on his head and sat Dr. Cooper under the helmet. I then opened the correct folder on the computer in front of me, and began to show him various pictures on a video screen directly in front of him. As each different picture appeared on the screen, I had diligently noted the areas of his brain which reacted and to what level, and which did not. As I focused on, and charted, the results of this graphing, some unusual things began to show themselves. I had debated with myself whether it would be better to inform Dr. Cooper of my findings before or after my turn underneath the helmet. By the end of the scan, I decided to keep my finding to myself until later. No use showing my hand too early. At the end of the session, I turned off the screen and raised the helmet. Dr. Cooper gave me a gloating look and announced, "Well, did you witness for yourself the extent of my mental acuity?"

"Dr. Cooper," I had reminded him, "this machine does not measure intelligence. It only records the areas of brain action in response to the images presented on the screen. Your brain reacts very quickly to most stimuli. That is, indeed, a sign of high intelligence. Now, it is my turn." I helped him out of the seat and instructed him as to where to place the electrodes on my head. He puffed up a bit at this and seemed offended. I decided to push my advantage, "Do you know how to operate the screen? The images are the defaults for this test. As time goes on, we can switch them up a bit. For today, just click on the folder titled, Images and press Play. The machine does the rest. I will read the results for both of us when I am finished."

He then sneered at me and replied, "Dr. Fowler, I do believe I could have figured that out, it's fairly basic operating procedure for any sort of brain response graphing." Bingo. He was on the defensive. Great!

Seeing my advantage, I shot back, "Dr. Cooper, need I remind you that I am in charge of this operation and the questions I will ask you may often ruffle your feather, as it were, but I am required to ask them. I am sorry if your fragile male ego feels threatened."

His eyes opened to an alarming degree. Score another one for me. "Excuse me? MY fragile ego? Who was the one who was reluctant to have her brain scanned with mine?"

The man, at that point, was truly starting to annoy the hell out of me, so I had snapped back at him, "That had nothing to do with ego, that had more to do with it being outside of standard operating procedure. I only acquiesced because of the strength of my ego, not the lack thereof."

He had then walked over to where I was standing, narrowed his eyes, and challenged me, "Well, shall we compare brains when we are finished here? I can assure you, the results will surely humble you."

I decided to relax and play it cool. Showing my annoyance was only playing into his hands and I wasn't about to let that happen. "We shall see when we are done, Dr. Cooper. For now, begin charting my responses." I then sat myself down in the chair and lowered the helmet onto my head. At the time, I had the feeling that this was going to be an enjoyable experience.

He opened the appropriate folder and myriad images began to appear on the screen in front of me. I was getting a bit curious as to what we would discover about the workings of my brain. I had already found out quite a bit about his.

My scan went without incident. I had the proper electrodes put in place and various pictures appeared on the large screen in front of me. There had been pictures of puppies, kittens, flowers, birds, numbers, everyday household items, people of both genders and of all ages, nude women, naked men, the seashore, fish, and many, many other things. Dr. Fowler had been correct; the scan took about an hour. It had actually been quite relaxing as the seat was very comfortable.

When my brain graphing was finished, Dr. Fowler and I had words concerning my ability to run her scan. Silly woman, it was a piece of cake for me. I truly believed she had underestimated my abilities and I let her know that in no uncertain terms. We agreed to compare our scans after hers was finished, and so she instructed me as to where to apply the electrodes on her head, as if I didn't already know. I have an eidetic memory and the darn things had just been placed on my cranium a little over an hour ago. For someone who can remember events from twenty years ago with perfect clarity, this little detail was nothing. So, when Dr. Fowler's electrodes were in place, I had opened the appropriate folder and charted her brain activity. The results had proven themselves very interesting; though I'm sure Dr. Fowler's take on this would be more detailed. She was a neurobiologist, after all. But I wasn't about to let her know this, I was just going to let her take the lead after we were done, which I had felt no doubt she would do. I would not have to say a word; her professional pride would preclude that. I had become very interested in what she had seen in mine, because I had gotten an eyeful from hers.

 **Are you all curious about the results? I sure am.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: And the Winner is…

I had studied the graphs of both our scans carefully and almost vomited. I stared at them again…and again…and again. What I had seen there confounded me. Our graphs had been nearly identical. A cold shiver had made its way up my spine. Where did I go from there? I wondered if I should lie to him about the results. No, I decided that Dr. Sheldon Cooper was far too intelligent for that ruse. If I hadn't been mistaken, he had spent the entire time I was reading the graphs peering over my shoulder. He knew damn well what I was seeing. The trouble had become what to tell him. I finally cleared my throat and broke the silence. "Well, Dr. Cooper, it seems your brain responds very quickly to stimuli and processes your responses at a rapid speed. Now here is something unique about your brain's workings. It seems you possess the gift of synesthesia. You associate colors and smells for different numbers."

He answered in a rather doubtful voice that led me to believe he didn't always enjoy being the odd guy, as much as he would protest otherwise, "Doesn't everyone?"

"No, Dr. Cooper," I answered him, "everyone does not."

"You do." he had shot at me. He had seen the graphs. He knew. "What do you see for the number two?"

"A dark blue."

"Four?"

"Bright red."

"Six?"

"A vibrant lime green." For the first time since I had met him, I became curious about Dr. Sheldon Cooper. I almost felt an affinity with the man. The key word there was almost. I still had my eye on the prize, so to speak, which was to get him functional enough to return to his job and to get me more than a few Ben Franklins. Many more. Still, I asked him in a conspiratorial voice, "What about you?"

He had hesitated and then admitted, "I see all prime numbers as red. Two primes together are pink. Like you, I see six as a lime green. Eight is most definitely purple.

"Of course," I answered him because it was, "not lavender, purple like it means it."

"Exactly!" His eyes lit up and then became veiled once more, as if remorseful that he had opened up to me at all. Dr. Sheldon Cooper was going to be a hard nut to crack, but crack he would. I don't like to brag, but my track record spoke for itself.

"All right, we are both synesthetic, but maybe we are a little aside from the norm. This next point is hard for me to mention, but I would not be professional if I did not address this fact. When you were shown the pictures of nude people, your brain did not have the usual response. Some people are heterosexual, some bisexual, some homosexual, but you are none of those."

He shrugged as if this was no big deal, "I've always considered myself asexual."

"Well, that's where you are mistaken. You are definitely not asexual, Dr. Cooper. Your amygdala was attempting to respond to the stimuli you viewed, but something was preventing a response, even at a subconscious level. If you were asexual, I would have witnessed no brain activity at all, but it was there, just stymied."

He gave a loud harrumph, "I could say the same for you."

My face had gone a bright scarlet, but I soon regained my composure, "Unfortunately, I have to agree with you. But my diagnosis is not important, yours is. You are the one with your job on the line."

Dr. Cooper addressed me in what for him passed as a kind voice, "Would you be offended if I asked you a question?"

At this point I reasoned to myself that I had nothing to hide from him, "Go ahead."

He looked me straight in the eye and inquired, "Dr. Fowler, if you were working with human beings, or even underclassmen, instead of monkeys, do you think you would still have your job? Are you short tempered with your monkeys?"

I had thought hard over my answer before I replied, "sometimes."

He nodded and continued, "And you say we are not asexual."

"No, Dr. Cooper, we are not. My diagnosis is that we are both sexually repressed. For both of us, our subconscious does not allow our brains to respond to sexual stimuli, though we are both hardwired to do so. Something is preventing our brains from making the proper responses to such things. When the expression of sexuality is thwarted, the frustration and rage inside is not directed at the cause of the repression. No, it is directed at those perceived as inferior, or helpless. For me, that is my monkeys. For you, that is your colleagues and students."

At that point, he seemed to be studying a spot on the wall as he commented, "And what do we do about that, if anything. I assure you, Dr. Fowler, I am quite happy as I am."

At that point, I had gotten up and walked over to the door, addressing his comment as I did so, "But Dr. Siebert is not. We will have to work on getting your brain to make the proper responses to these stimuli. Let's go back to my office and work out our next step."

Knowing he had little choice in the matter, he rose from his seat and followed me out the door.

As Dr. Fowler interpreted the results of both our scans, I peered closely over her shoulder. It wasn't that I hadn't trusted her, wait, it was. I have always trusted very few people and I had known this woman less than a week. Short term does not equate trust in my book. As I had viewed both our graphs I was struck by one thing in particular, the graphs were almost identical. Which meant we responded to all the visual stimuli presented to us in much the same way. When Dr. Fowler mentioned synethesia, I was confused to find out that not everyone associated colors or smells with different numbers. But after she pointed that out to me, I took great comfort in knowing that she did, also. We bantered a bit about what colors entered our minds when we saw certain numbers. I had liked that she saw six as a vibrant green, also. It almost gave us a sense of kinship. No. Wait. I had never felt any kinship with anyone, not even my best friend, Leonard. And I was not about to begin that tragic, twisted journey with anyone, even if they did think like me. Still, the idea that there was someone right in front of me who understood how I thought was intriguing.

Dr. Fowler then let sex rear its dirty head. I had always considered myself asexual and was quite content with that. No chasing after women who were beneath me like my friends, oh no. Sheldon Cooper was an island unto himself and I had fully intended keeping it that way. In my estimation, sexual feelings led to all sorts of chaos that interfered with a person's true work, studying the workings of the universe. Let Leonard, Howard, and Raj, my three closest friends, chase tail all they wanted. I was chasing nobler things, namely a Nobel Prize. I had neither the time nor the inclination to lower myself to that primal level. I believed I was above all of that. And then Dr. Fowler had dropped the bomb that I was not asexual at all, I was sexually repressed. I had badly wanted to argue that she was wrong, but I never argue with science and there it was, right in front of me. I then found myself in a quandary. I had liked how I was, but to get back to my research I had to change that and adopt behaviors that could possibly derail my dreams. Sometimes life just sucked, to quote Leonard's girlfriend, Penny.

Something interesting happened at that point; Dr. Fowler explained to me the results of sexual repression and was able to make a psychological point that how I addressed the students in my class was a symptom of this condition, not the main problem. She even had to admit that she most likely treated her simian counterparts in much the same manner as I dealt with my students. I found that fascinating and something viable that I could use in future negotiations with her. In spite of myself, I had found myself wanting to investigate this idea of sexual repression further; the scientist in me had won out over my pride. She then reminded me that me that my position at the university hinged on my conquering this 'flawed' thought process. That being so, I followed Dr. Fowler back to her lab where she had informed me we were going to develop a strategy to deal with this problem and get my brain and me back to working in a feasible manner.

When we had returned to my lab, I began to detail exactly how we were going to treat Dr. Cooper's sexual aversion in order for him to return to his position at the university. I asked him, "Dr. Cooper, are you familiar with CBT and Exposure Therapy?"

He rolled his eyes at me and answered in his usual condescending tone, "I am quite familiar with Exposure Therapy. I do know the basics, you gradually expose your subject to that which bothers them and then you increase the exposure as time goes on until they have no further aversion to their former nemesis. CBT is working together to change how the mind thinks regarding the trigger stimuli, which in my case would be sexual thoughts or actions. But how will that work with me?"

I remember checking the notes I had made and answering him as honestly as I could, I owed him that much, "That is simple. I do not know why you are sexually avoidant; these tests only show that you are. What I would like to do is first use very basic exposure therapy to perhaps show us why you repress any and all sexual feeling. When we know why, we can then incorporate CBT in changing your negative thought associations with anything of a sexual nature. What I am suggesting is meeting with a woman unrelated to you in a neutral setting."

Dr. Cooper shot me an extremely confused look and reached for one of the bottled waters I had placed on the table, "Aren't I doing that right now?"

I shook my head and began to explain the process to him. For a certified genius, the man had the social acumen of a gnat, "This has to be in a social setting. I am quite sure you have often dealt with females in a professional way with no aversion or panic."

He began to look extremely annoyed and took a long drink from his water bottle before replying to my question. I had seen this before; it was a deliberate stalling tactic. He finally informed me in a matter-of-fact voice, "Panic? No. Aversion? Sometimes. I must admit to you, I am not overjoyed at the prospect of being under your care, and this is a professional situation, is it not?"

Maybe there was hope for him yet. I smiled at him and replied, "Good point, Dr. Cooper. I totally agree with you. I am suggesting you meet with a female outside of this lab, in a more social setting. More like having dinner, going grocery shopping, or visiting a museum, something along those lines. Do you know any females you could do this with?"

His eyes narrowed and he spat out, "Do I look like a Don Juan to you, Dr. Fowler? Wait, scrap that. I'm a chick magnet and I know it. I just haven't succumbed to any offers so far. I could use my roommate Leonard's girlfriend. She would expect no romance as she knows full well my first love is science, not the weaker sex."

That did it, that did it! I then slammed my clipboard down on the table and spat out, "How dare you! Weaker sex? Weaker sex? Dr. Cooper that is quite a misogynistic remark. I know for sure, that I am every bit your equal."

He had put his water bottle down and gotten very close to my face, "Oh really?"

I refused to back off, our noses were practically touching, "Yes, really."

Dr. Cooper then took a step back and challenged me, "How would you like to put your money where your mouth is, Dr. Fowler?"

I'd had about enough of his attitude, but I have to admit, I was slightly intrigued by his challenge, so I asked him, "What are you suggesting, Dr. Cooper?"

His eyebrows shot up and he looked at me smugly, "I am making the suggestion that you and I meet for dinner and put your little theory to the test. We will meet for dinner once a week and do a follow up in your lab the next day for a session of CBT, headed by yourself. Twice a month, we will both be rescanned and our progress will be checked."

I turned my back to him, went over to the refrigerator in the corner and pulled out my lunch. It was now the middle of the afternoon and I was getting hungry. I turned back around and asked him, "What do you mean, 'our' progress?"

At that statement, Dr. Cooper made a point of also turning away from me and addressing me with his back turned. Very annoying. "You stated we are both sexually repressed. Therefore, Miss Smarty Pants, it is only right we both work on our repression.

He had me there. Oh well, I had reasoned I would get some dinner conversation out of all of this. Plus, this would definitely help me fulfill my commitment to my mother that I date once a year so I could have the use of her George Foreman Grill and furthermore, it would get her off my back about my lack of a social life. I suppose I could have just gone out and purchased a grill of my own, but this gave my mother a sense of accomplishment when I did date. Far be it from me to deny the lady a sense of purpose. I decided to play along, out of curiosity if nothing else, "Very well." I responded to his suggestion, "We will start tomorrow night. Seeing as this is your idea, you name the restaurant and I will meet you there."

I had soon discovered Dr. Cooper wasn't done; he had an unusual request, "Dr. Fowler, Could you pick me up for said rendezvous?"

I had entertained no intentions of making this meeting seem like a date, and picking him up would only enforce that impression. I put my lunch in the microwave to heat it and turned to stare at him oddly, "Why would I do that? This is merely our first meeting. We don't want to rush things."

He looked a bit sheepish as he explained to me, "I don't drive. If you don't pick me up, we will have to stay in my neighborhood and there would be every chance we could run into one or more of my friends."

This had made perfect sense to me and I told him, "I see your point. We could go to the Applebee's in Monrovia. I could pick you up; it is on my way there. But I must warn you, all forms of physical contact, up to, and including coitus, are off the table." I had to draw the line in the damn sand somewhere.

Dr. Cooper nodded curtly and prepared to leave, "Agreed. I will see you at six."

Oh no, he was _not_ going to start making the rules! I had to nip that in the bud, pronto! "Wait a minute, buster. I'm picking you up, why do you get to set the time?"

He had answered me quite succinctly, "Because I live by a strict schedule and dinner on Saturdays is seven o'clock. If you pick me up at six, my dinner should be in front of me by seven. Any other questions?" he asked me in a very haughty voice.

I had seen no reason to prolong the conversation. I wanted the man gone, even if he did have a fine brain and the deepest blue eyes I had ever looked into. No, I wasn't going to go there. This was going to be a purely professional relationship of a dubious duration. I answered him, "None. I will see you tomorrow night at six p.m. Dr. Cooper. Now, I bid you good day."

He had then opened the door and exited my lab, calling over his shoulder, "Good day, Dr. Fowler."

When we had gotten back to her lab, Dr. Fowler commenced explaining her itinerary for 'curing' me and returning me to my rightful position at the university. She mentioned both Exposure Therapy and CBT as part of her plan. She then asked me if I knew what these two therapies were and what they entailed. Dear lord, how ignorant did she think I was! I have a more than passing knowledge of all the hard and soft sciences. I then expressed my indignation with my face and began to answer her inquiry. When I had given her enough information to nullify her doubts, she explained that she was going to use a combination of both these therapies to help discover why I was what she termed 'sexually avoidant'. I preferred to think I merely had no interest whatsoever, but Dr. Fowler made it sound like I was a mass of raging male hormones just waiting to be uncaged from some sort of mental prison in my mind. Ridiculous!

So, she began to outline her plan of attack. She wanted me try, as she so clearly put it, "meeting with a woman unrelated to you in a neutral setting." I pointed out to her that this is what I was currently doing, but Dr. Fowler stressed that it had to be a social get together, not a professional one. Rats! But my magnificent mind came to my rescue once again. I immediately thought of Leonard's girlfriend, Penny. That would be easy to do, with little or no problem. I would merely 'borrow' Penny from my roommate for a few hours. Problem solved. However, her response to my saying that I had never fallen prey to the charms of the weaker sex changed my mind about that entirely.

Dr. Fowler had immediately lost her temper as if I were insulting her personally, which I hadn't been at all. In reality, she had never crossed my mind when making that comment. I had been thinking of all the ditzy females I had been regularly exposed to in my life, not her. But, there was something in her flashing green eyes that both challenged and intrigued me. I pretended nonchalance and then threw down the proverbial gauntlet; I asked her if she were willing to be the female counterpart in this experiment. I then suggested my own therapeutic outline for us both to work on our mutual 'sexual repression'. Her response had been to turn away and walk over to a refrigerator behind the table. Surprisingly, she had simply retrieved what looked like her lunch and agreed to join me in this endeavor. Her easy acquiescence fascinated me. What was this woman up to? I supposed you could have used the word intrigued to describe my feelings at this point. Whatever her reasons, and I'm most sure she had them, she was agreeing to go out to dinner with me.

It was then the problem of logistics reared its ugly head. I am far too advanced a human being to be bothered with driving and I mentioned this fact somewhat reluctantly to her. You would be surprised at the negative comments or pleadings of 'why don't you learn how?' I have gotten over the years when I have revealed my distaste for operating a motor vehicle. Surprisingly, Dr. Fowler had not been bothered by this bit of information and agreed to pick me up when I had stated my reasons for wanting to avoid the Pasadena area. It would have been disastrous if someone I knew, like Howard Wolowitz, had seen me out with a female. The questions and sexual innuendo would have been never ending. To my great relief, Dr. Fowler had made it very clear at that point that any physical contact would not be expected from either of us. Again, I had found myself becoming further intrigued by this woman. What was happening to me? I reminded myself that this arrangement was for purely therapeutic reasons and it would be of a short duration. I found comfort in this thought and we eventually agreed that she would pick me up at six o'clock the following evening. I am a creature of habit and I was not about to change my dining habits for anything, not even a most interesting green-eyed neurobiologist.

 **Don't you want to be a fly on the wall for this date? Good news…you will be.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Small Talk on a Big Date

 **Technically, this will be Sheldon's first date with someone of the opposite gender. Good luck to them both.**

The next evening, I picked up Dr. Cooper at his residence precisely at six o'clock p.m., as I had promised him I would. He still seemed to be working on keeping an emotional distance between us as I found him waiting in front of his building. I had felt a little pang growing inside of me. Was I not even worth the lobby? Oh well, this was his therapy and I had to do whatever kept him comfortable…for now. We had faced enough of a hassle earlier regarding this meeting. Dr. Cooper had called me, yes I had given him my number, and attempted to cancel the evening on the pretext that having dinner with me would interfere with his laundry schedule. I had not believed his honesty about the matter and asked him, "What the hell, Dr. Cooper? What's the big deal about your laundry?"

He answered me in an annoyed tone of voice that gave me the impression that he thought I should have known this already, "This is Saturday night."

I didn't make the connection, "Yes, I know that. So?"

He informed me of its importance in a petulant voice, "I always do my laundry on Saturday night at eight fifteen."

I knew better than to let him get away with that, even for a minute and I replied, "Well do it this afternoon or tomorrow. We have work to do."

He repeated himself in an even more annoying tone, "But I always do my laundry on Saturday nights at eight fifteen. "

I'd had about enough of listening to his childish prattle and defenses, "Listen to me, Dr. Cooper. This rigidity of your will do nothing but stand in the way of your progress with me. I understand this is out of your comfort zone, but that is what this entire evening is supposed to be about; getting you out of your usual patterns of behavior."

He had answered me much like a disgruntled child, "Very well, I will do my laundry this afternoon, but you can't expect me to like it."

I decided to nip this childish behavior in the bud. His attitude may have worked with others, but it was not about to work with me. I was his therapist and he needed me to get his precious job back. I decided to use this to my advantage, "Dr. Cooper, I really don't care if you like it or not. There will be many things about this therapy that I can almost guarantee you will not enjoy. But, if you cooperate with me, we will have you back at your job in short order. If you do not, I will have to inform Dr. Siebert of your failure to cooperate. Do you understand me?"

He surrendered the battle and replied with a sad sigh, "I suppose so. I will be ready at six."

So, there I was, picking up this man-child in front of his building, which was in a nice part of northwest Pasadena. He opened the door of my car and greeted me with, "Thank you for being on time. Punctuality is of the utmost importance to me."

I then nodded absentmindedly and prepared to pull the car back out into traffic, not an easy chore on busy Los Robles Ave., but I managed it. Once on our way, we tried to make small talk, with little success. I decided to open up the conversation with a discussion about our destination. Earlier that day, I had made the decision that we should go to Mimi's Café instead of Applebee's. As it had been a Saturday night, I knew Applebee's would be crowded and all of their televisions in the place would be playing games from all the local sports teams competing that night. "Sheldon, "I had told him, "what do you think about going to Mimi's instead of Applebee's? The televisions at Applebee's will all be tuned to some sporting event or another and I don't think I'm up to an evening of listening to drunken people shouting at the television when their team scores, or doesn't. It seems the noise level is the same regardless of the score."

He looked over at me as if I had told him the moon was green and whined, "But you said we were going to Applebee's!"

I couldn't believe a so-called adult could respond in such a fashion to a simple question. I knew I had to nip this in the bud, "Sheldon, do you really want to hear all the drunks yelling for the home team or watch them get into brawls and get evicted?"

He looked unhappy, but conceded the point, "I suppose not. What is good to eat at Mimi's?"

I grinned over at him and replied in a happy voice, "They have fantastic French Onion soup, their salads are excellent, and any meat dish you get there is quite good."

He looked out the front windshield and did not answer for some time. When he did, he sighed and told me, "Very well, Mimi's it is. I have no love for drunken sports fans. I suppose the quiet will give us a better chance to talk. That is what we will be doing, am I correct?"

I had nodded without turning my head. We were exiting the freeway and I wanted to concentrate on the traffic around me, "Yes. I want you to get comfortable talking to a female you are not related to or haven't known for years." We were both silent until we approached the restaurant. As I parked the car, I made one more attempt at conversation, "Ah, here we are. It doesn't look crowded, so let's go inside and find out for certain."

"Well put, we certainly can ascertain that from right here in the car." he opened the car door and stepped outside, "The smells from there are quite delightful. This may just work."

We entered the restaurant and were asked to give our name to the smiling host, "Fowler." I told him.

Sheldon's face took on an annoyed look and he blurted out, "No, the name is Cooper."

"Fowler."

"Cooper."

The host rolled his eyes and interjected, "I'll just put you down as Cowler, how does that work?"

Dr. Cooper raised an eyebrow in disdain and replied, "That sounds a bit too bovine for my tastes." I had to agree with him that time.

"Okay, I'll just call you Fooper. How's that?"

I had shaken my head and told him, "Neither of us is named Fooper."

"Well, decide on a name then, or I'll give your table to the couple behind you."

At that, we had turned and stared at each other wide eyed. Sheldon volunteered, "How about Hofstadter?"

What kind of a name is that?" I had asked him in surprise. "Did you make that up?

He snorted, "Not at all. That is the last name of my best friend."

My first impulse had been to ask him, 'You have friends?' but I figured that would be an entirely inappropriate question for the situation, so I merely nodded and told him, "Hofstadter is fine if it means we can get a table."

As the host was writing our bogus name down on the waiting list in front of him, he looked up and saw a waitress approaching him. She pointed at us and nodded, after which he grabbed two menus, motioned us to follow him, and happily led us to our table. I suppose he was glad to be done with the both of us, but I couldn't help that. We were what we were; a couple of geeky, anal retentive nerds attempting to move completely out of our comfort zone and have a dinner date.

Some people, I will not be naming any names, have called me stubborn in the past. How can I be stubborn? Take the night Dr. Fowler and I had our first dinner together. That afternoon I had been at home gathering my laundry in preparation for heading to the laundry room that evening. I knew full well that Dr. Fowler and I had agreed on her picking my up that evening at six, but that had been before I had realized that the dinner we planned was to be on a Saturday. I always do my laundry on Saturday night. Always. In my mind, this was a matter of calling Dr .Fowler and simply rescheduling this meeting for another night. Unfortunately, here was where she showed _her_ stubbornness. She insisted that I move doing my laundry to another time. What was that hippy dippy thinking all about? I tried to reason with the woman but was met with nothing but resistance. Dr. Fowler kept insisting that doing something outside of my comfort zone would aid in my progress. I highly doubted that, but I had to play along with her little game as long as she was reporting my actions to Siebert. So, I finally agreed to meet her at six. But darn it, she was not going to be invited into my home, not even into my building. I was hoping I was making my indignation perfectly clear by waiting outside my apartment complex's front door. This woman and her annoying plans would not even be allowed to grace the lobby. Take that, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler!

I will give the woman this, she was on time. She pulled up in front of my building at exactly six o'clock. I distinctly remember remarking kindly to her that I admired her punctuality. I was trying to improve my social skills; she had to give me that didn't she? She did not. Dr. Fowler all but ignored me as we drove off, headed for Monrovia and Applebee's.

Only I had found out we were NOT headed for Applebee's. The vexacious woman had taken it upon herself to change our destination. She had asked me in a falsely cheerful voice, "Sheldon, what do you think about going to Mimi's instead of Applebee's?" Now at this point I felt I had been doing all the bending that evening and I began to get more than a tad annoyed. I stated that we had agreed on Applebee's. I hoped my tone of voice told her I was not a man to be toyed with in that way. Unfortunately for me, she went on to give some excellent reasons why Mimi's would be a far superior eating establishment for the evening. What could I do? Dr. Fowler had used logic in making her argument. What she said was true, Applebee's would more than likely be full of drunken Neanderthals watching some form of sport or another and getting louder and more obnoxious as time went on. How was I supposed to argue with that? I wasn't. I agreed to switch our restaurant to Mimi's Café, but not without a certain level of resignation that I hoped would lead her to believe that I was giving in reluctantly. Truth be told, drunken men watching sports reminded me far too much of my father and that form of angst was not going to help my progress in the least. So, with a studied nonchalance, I looked out the passenger side window of the car and plotted my next move. I did, however, make sure to ascertain that the main activity of the evening would be conversation. I was not about to engage in any physical activity with the woman. My words would have to do.

It did not take long before we pulled into the parking area next to Mimi's Café. As I exited the car a most delicious aroma wafted towards me. Dr. Fowler made a comment about the restaurant not being crowded. I'd had to bite my tongue on that one. There were only four cars in the parking lot, so unless those had been clown cars, there was most likely no more than ten to twenty people inside. However, I made the correct reply and lauded her for her visual acuity. Good lord, I hoped the rest of the evening was not going to consist of such moments. My tongue would be severely bruised from my constant biting of it.

We entered the establishment, which was decorated in faux New Orleans décor, in other words gaudy and French, and proceed towards the host's desk where we found a simpering young gentleman who seemed fairly eager to take our names. Why he needed to do this in a mostly empty restaurant was beyond me, but once again, I bit my tongue.

A more honest statement would be that I bit it for a short period of time. Dr. Fowler had the nerve to give the man her surname, not mine. Now, l hardly consider myself a chauvinist, but proper social etiquette states that when a man and woman go to dinner, it is the man's surname that is most often used for reservations, unless the woman is paying, which I was fairly sure was not the case here. I believe the term for our financial arrangement that evening was referred to as 'going Dutch'. Therefore, we should have discussed this beforehand, which we had not. I felt compelled at that point to interject my displeasure by correcting Dr. Fowler and informing the young man that, "No, the name is Cooper."

Dr. Fowler countered that with a simple, "Fowler."

Not to be outdone, I responded right back with, "Cooper."

This could have gone on for some protracted length of time, but the eager young man suggested he could call us an amalgamation of our surnames, Cowler. That sounded like Dr. Fowler and I were a couple of cows and I told him so. He then suggested the name Fooper. I hope I don't have to explain why that one was unacceptable. Suddenly, my superior brain went to work and I asked my companion if we could be called Hofstadter, which is Leonard's last name. She then questioned me as to whether I had made the name up. Made the name up? Good lord, if I was going to use a made up name, I would hope my brilliant mind would come up with something more euphonious than Hofstadter! I then informed Dr. Fowler that the name Hofstadter belonged to my best friend. She, of course, saw the wisdom in my choice and that is the name that appeared on the 'waiting list', though why they needed a waiting list when there were twenty or more empty tables in the place was beyond me. In any case, a waitress quickly came over to inform the host that there was now a table free for us. And people wonder why they can only get low paying jobs. I again reminded myself that I was going through this ordeal to regain my position as lead physicist, so I swallowed my pride and allowed myself to be led to a booth on one side of the almost empty room.

Once seated, I had stared at my menu without really seeing it. My thoughts were jumbled and many. There I was, stuck with one of the most arrogant, condescending, people I had ever encountered in my life and I was supposed to sit here and share small talk and a dinner with him? Lord help my soul. I decided to talk about the food, that would be a safe topic, right? Wrong. I asked Dr. Cooper, "What looks good to you?"

His eyes stared at me over his menu and he replied in an annoyed voice, "What looks good to me? I'm supposed to order a meal based on how it looks? That is pure hokum. One orders food for its taste, not how it looks."

I wanted to smack the smugness off of his face, but I held myself together and answered him in as calm a voice as possible, "What looks good to you is merely a trite phrase used while dining in a restaurant, it does not mean you order the food based on its looks. "

He then made a fairly expressive eye roll and replied, "I know that, Miss Smarty Pants, I just expected more intelligent conversation to come from your lips."

He had begun to annoy me once more, "Well forgive me for using the common vernacular. Let me rephrase that and ask you what you think you will be ordering."

He gave a small grin and announced, "I believe I will order one of my trusted standbys, a cheeseburger."

Sorry to say, I lost it at that point. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. "WHAT? We are sitting in a restaurant renowned for its fine Cajun and Creole cuisine and you want a CHEESEBURGER?"

He nodded and looked at me as if I had three eyes, "Yes. I wish to order a cheeseburger. I am not familiar with this restaurant or its food and a cheeseburger is a safe choice."

Aha! His reply had given me an inkling as to how I could get under his skin, "So, you always play it safe?

His eyes narrowed and he shot back at me, "I could ask you the same question. If you were one to take chances, you would have gone on a date with Bert from the Geology Department by now."

That floored me. I had to ask him, "How did you know about Bert?"

He shrugged and took a sip of his water before answering, "A university is a small community of its own, word gets around."

We were interrupted by our waitress coming to take our order. When that was accomplished, we returned to our discussion.

I addressed him in my best no nonsense tone of voice, "My personal relationships are none of your business, Dr. Cooper!"

He smiled and gave a soft chuckle, "Oh, you are admitting you have a personal relationship with Bert?"

I sighed with weariness. Just conversing with the man was exhausting, "No. He's just a casual friend and a colleague of mine."

His eyes began to dance and he looked me straight in the eye, "Hmmm. I've heard that one before. I believe it falls under the heading of conscious denial."

At that point I exploded, "I'M NOT DATING BERT!"

He calmly took another sip of his water. I wanted to kill him, but my anger seemed to have little effect on him, "Fine. It really doesn't matter to me except as an example of how you can be rigid in your behaviors, also."

Okay, after that I had to ask him, "How does not dating Bert qualify as rigidity?"

He looked up as our food arrived, "Yes, the cheeseburger is mine. Thank you. Anyway, back to your personal life, have you ever dated anyone on a steady basis?"

I just wanted to begin eating so I gave him a very short, "No."

He nodded in seeming approbation, "Nor have I. We are both too set in our ways to accommodate anyone else's views, wants, and needs into our lives. I do believe the appropriate term for this point in our conversation is 'Score one for Cooper'." He then picked up his burger and took a bite. I hated him.

I wasn't going to let him get away with that one, "Dr. Cooper, you have not scored."

He put down his cheeseburger and looked at me with a most earnest expression on his face, "Of course not. I'm looking at you and you still have all of your clothing on your body. Scoring would be extremely difficult under those circumstances."

I decided to try another tactic seeing as how I was losing ground with this topic, "Dr. Cooper, what do you say we change the subject? Let's talk about our hobbies and see if we have anything in common there."

He nodded his head and gave a faint smile, "Fine. Off the top of my head I can tell you I like comic books, Harry Potter, super heroes, science, Indiana Jones movies, and Dr. Who. How about you?"

A smile appeared on my face as I thought about all of my favorite things, "I like to read, knit, and play music, as well as study scientific journals." I didn't tell him I also wrote fanfiction. Why scare the man?

He took another bite of his burger and then replied, "I see. What instrument or instruments do you play?"

I was proud of this one and it showed as I beamed and answered him, "I play the harp. You?" I then lifted a fork full of salad to my mouth.

He replied to my question with just as much pride, "I play keyboard, bongos, and the Theremin. I also practice Tuvan Throat Singing."

Maybe there was more to this man than comic books and science after all. I responded to him with a smile, "Fascinating. I've never met anyone who played the Theremin before."

Mr. Arrogant was back and her told me, "Little lady, I'm not just anyone."

I finished a bite of my salad and replied, "Yeah, I kinda got that. What do you read the most?"

He took the last bite of his burger and followed that with a swallow of his lemonade, "That would be either comic books or science journals. You?"

I pushed my empty salad bowl to one side and informed him, "I love Chaucer."

He rolled his eyes to excess this time. The man's condescension apparently knew no limits, "Ah, the classics. Boring tales from dead men. I see."

I defended my reading choice to him emphatically, "Chaucer is NOT boring, and comic books are silly books for children."

He spat back, "Are not!"

"Are!"

"Are not!"

I put up my hand and told him, "Wait, I see one issue we both face; you were right,we are too set in our ways. I'm going to give both of us a challenge."

He cocked his head quizzically, "What would that be, if I may ask."

I threw him an evil grin, "You must read something I enjoy and I must do the same with reading material you enjoy. Rule number one, no scientific journals allowed."

His face fell, "Darn! Okay, but would you read comic books?"

I shook my head vehemently, "No. But I am willing to try a Harry Potter book."

"You have to read them in order, so start with the first one."

I nodded and made a mental note of that, "Fine. And you can read the Canterbury Tales."

His head shook just as emphatically, "No. I refuse to do that."

"And why not?" I demanded.

He stated, "Because Chaucer never finished it. I cannot tolerate beginning something and not seeing its ending."

I could see his point. His MEG had shown he had a very low frustration level, so I conceded this point, "Very well, I will have your read Troilus and Criseyde, instead."

He gave me knowing smile and replied, "Ah, a tale of a man mocking love! How apropos."

I wiped my mouth with my napkin and asked, "Do we have a deal?"

He nodded, "We have a deal."

I remember telling him, "Very well. Seeing as how our meal is finished, I suggest we pay our bills, and I will drop you back at your apartment."

He rose from his seat and took his bill with him, "Agreed. I have no problem with that."

We made our way to the cashier, paid our bills, and soon left Mimi's. When I dropped him at his apartment he had a surprising question for me, "Am I supposed to kiss you or something, because I don't feel moved to do that."

I panicked for a moment and then collected myself and told him, "Nor do I. A simple handshake will do."

"Good." He took my hand in his and gave it a hearty shake, "Good night, Dr. Fowler. I will see you on Thursday morning for our CBT session.

He released my hand, opened the car door and exited as I called after him, "Good night, Dr. Cooper, I will see you then." The man was insufferable, but there was something about him and his blue eyes that challenged me and I found myself looking forward to Thursday morning.

When we had finally been seated at our table, Dr. Fowler asked a most ludicrous question. Out of that perfectly sensible looking face had come the words, "What looks good to you?" I could not believe such nonsense had come from the mouth of such a logical woman. I reminded her that food was chosen because of taste, not how it looked. To which she explained to me that she had merely been using a common colloquialism. We continued with our so called, 'conversation' and she rephrased her question to ask me what I would be ordering for dinner. Why on earth couldn't she have said that in the first place? But my personal purgatory was far from over. She then took umbrage at what I had decided to order. There seemed to be no pleasing this woman. I simply stated that as I had never been to this establishment before, I was happy with ordering something safe, a food item that I knew most cooks and chefs could prepare well. This did not sit well with Dr. Fowler and she then asked me if I always 'played it safe'.

At that point I decided to have a little fun with Dr. Fowler. I proposed that she had the same inclination to play on the safe side of the street as well as she had so far resisted going out with Bert from the Geology Department. Oddly enough, Ms. Fowler seemed extremely surprised I knew of Bert and his subtle wooing of her, which I found naïve. The entire school knew Bert was crazy for her, even the Humanities Department knew of it, and they are usually kept out of the social loop at Cal Tech. I mentioned something along those lines to her right before our food was brought to our table. Before we commence eating, Dr. Fowler commented that her personal relationships were none of my business. I couldn't resist at that point, she had left her self completely open for my next comment where I made the point that she had just admitted in a roundabout way that she was having a personal relationship with Bert.

In response she almost screamed at me, "I AM NOT DATING BERT!" Hmmm. It seemed I struck a nerve with that one. I then tied in her refusal to date Bert to her rigidity, which she imagined to be similar to mine. She wasn't far off with that one, if the truth had to be told. Still, I was having fun baiting her and gauging her reactions. Maybe this going to dinner with females could actually be entertaining. Anyway, I then explained to her that both of us were very set in our ways and the idea of sharing our lives or altering our schedules for another human being was abhorrent to both of us. I then made the comment that we could refer to this conversation as 'Score one for Cooper' to which she took immediate offense and informed me that I hadn't scored. When I pointed out the obviousness of her comment, how do you score with a woman who still had at least three layers of clothing on, she decided to change the subject. I inwardly chuckled.

So, we began to discuss our hobbies. Hers sounded abhorrent. Knitting and playing the harp did little for my libido, but that was just as well. I had no intention whatsoever of touching Dr. Fowler in any way, shape, or form. I proudly listed mine, comic books, super heroes, etc…which seemed to bore her. I then asked her, as she had listed playing music as one of her hobbies, what instrument she played. She told me the harp. Oh boy, Dr. Fowler did NOT live on the edge at all! In return, she asked me what instruments I played and I told her. I even threw in my Tuvan Throat Singing for good measure. She seemed appreciative of my playing the Theremin, but most people are, nothing new there. She then asked me what my favorite reading material was and I told her it had to be comic books or science journals, which was nothing but the truth.

I then asked Dr. Fowler what she enjoyed reading most and she told me Chaucer. Good lord! Chaucer. I had no respect for most of the classics, I still don't, and I then had a little fun with her. I called Chaucer's works boring. That rang a bell for sure. She responded by inferring that comics books were just for children to read, which I vehemently denied and she kept insisting was the truth. What could you do with so stubborn a woman? I was at a loss at this point when Dr. Fowler made the observation we were both stubborn and set in our ways. I swear, I felt like calling her Captain Obvious. Then she surprised me by coming up with a mutual challenge. That surely piqued my interest. She offered that we both read something from the other's reading list, science journals not allowed. I thought hard and asked her if she was open to reading comic books, which she was not. But she did agree to read the first Harry Potter book, which met with my approval. She suggested I read Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, which I point blank refused to do. It is an unfinished work and I cannot abide unfinished projects or events. They make me twitch. So, we settled on Troilus and Criseyde instead. I knew the story, after skimming through it in college, and I found the premise humorous. Dr. Fowler had given me a tale of a man who was punished for mocking love. Very fitting, I suppose, and I told her as much.

We agreed to the deal, paid for our meals, and left the restaurant. When we arrived at my apartment buildings, I looked at Dr. Fowler and felt a bit concerned. Did she expect me to kiss her goodnight? That was the social convention at the end of a date, but I had no desire to kiss her, or so I told myself. To my relief, she suggested shaking hands and that we did, and set the next appointment to see each other for the following Thursday. I suppose I was relieved to be home, but something in me kept hearing her melodious, even pitched voice in my head. It was calming and so very different from the usual nasal screeching of my female students. In spite of everything I had said, I almost found myself looking forward to Thursday and the chance to be challenged on a mental level by a most intelligent young woman. A woman who played the harp and loved Chaucer. Who knew?

 **It seems the two of them have both found something intriguing about the other. Where will this all lead? Read on.**


	5. Chapter 5: A Couple of Mothers

Chapter 5: A Couple of Mothers

 **Amy begins CBT with Sheldon. This may get interesting.**

Thursday had soon rolled around and at precisely ten a.m. I heard the by now familiar triple knock of Dr. Cooper. I had been studying both his MEG results and his behavior of Saturday night and had come to the conclusion that a warmer, more welcoming atmosphere would served our purpose far better than me taking on the role of drill sergeant

"Please come in, Dr. Cooper." I called to him in my most welcoming voice.

The door opened and Dr. Cooper entered my lab. He greeted me with a prosaic, "Good morning, Dr. Fowler. Shall we get to work?" There seemed to be no wasted small talk with this guy. He got straight to the point.

I nodded and began to outline what I had discovered, "Of course. I have been studying your MEG results and it seems there are a few things that bother you immensely. We will deal with them one at a time. Oh, by the way, a couple of them don't seem to matter much at this point, so we will not be addressing them unless I find it necessary in the future."

He took the same seat he had taken last time he had visited me, by the dissecting table and asked me, "What would those two things be? I'm curious."

I opened his file and responded without looking up at him, "I told you, they are not important."

He refused to let it go, "It's my brain, I must insist on know what the two things are."

I put down his folder and gave a small sigh, "Very well. It seems you have an extremely negative reaction to birds and airplanes. But those two things are not part of the problem Dr. Siebert has mentioned, so for now, we won't be discussing those."

He seemed satisfied with that answer and continued, "All right. What other area or areas are we going to be dealing with today?"

I stood directly across from him and stated as plainly as I could, "Your brain reacts very strongly to pictures of middle aged and young women. I'd say images of women in their forties and above and those under twenty five set off the most negative reactions in your brain."

Dr. Cooper gave an odd laugh and responded, "So somewhat older and younger women are my Achilles' heel, so to speak?"

I walked over to the file cabinet and put his folder away. I then asked him, "It would seem so. Tell me, do you have a good relationship with your mother?"

This hadn't seem to upset him, surprisingly, and he told me, "At the present time, yes. But it wasn't always that way."

This was getting good. I had taken out a legal pad and begun taking notes, "Would you care to expound on that?"

Dr. Cooper looked a little uncomfortable with that question, but went along with where I was leading, "I suppose, if l must."

I decided to play Good Cop and I responded in my serene, kindly, voice, "You don't have to Dr. Cooper, but it would help get to the root of what's bothering you."

That approach worked very well with him and he began to open up to me, "I see. Well, when I was growing up, my mother strongly favored my twin sister and my brother. But that is not the case anymore. Still, I suppose that left its mark. May I ask you something personal, Dr. Fowler?"

I had smiled back at him as I used his own response to me, "If you must."

He looked decidedly uncomfortable as he asked me, "Do you have a satisfactory relationship with your mother?"

That one was easy. I had given him a quick, "No."

One of his eyebrows went dangerously high and he drummed his fingers in impatience on the table, "Details if you don't mind."

I gave a deep sigh and began my explanation of the twisted relationship between my mother and me, "My mother was oppressive, controlling, and extremely critical of everyone and everything. She still is, if I want to be honest. But she can't hurt me anymore, so it's immaterial to me now. What about your mother, aside from the favoritism?"

My openness had seemed to relax his usually guarded nature and he responded with no hesitation, "My mother is very religious and at times, she uses Jesus and the Bible in attempts to bend me to her will."

That was intriguing. My mother was much the same way. I asked him, "Is she ever successful?"

He shook his head and pretended to study something across the room, "Not anymore. We have pretty much declared a climate of détente over that issue." He then turned and looked directly at me and stated the obvious, "It seems you and I both have matriarchal issues, do we not?"

His gaze unnerved me and I had to look down at my notes. I decided to change the subject to something less personal, "Perhaps. Now, for CBT starters, I am going to be showing you pictures of women who would fall under the category of middle aged mothers. These first pictures will show them scowling. I want you to carefully study them and tell me your reaction to them."

I then handed him a portfolio full of pictures of innocuous women, all of a certain age. They all had looks of displeasure on their faces. Dr. Cooper did as I had instructed him, he studied them all intently and when he was finished, he placed them back in the folder.

He looked troubled and he told me, "I felt very uncomfortable, even angry. It was rather like my fight or flight response was kicking in."

I nodded and encouraged him to open up further, "But you could do neither here, am I correct?"

Dr. Cooper thought a moment and then replied in a soft voice I could barely hear, "I could have left, but they are just pictures, so they couldn't harm me."

I wanted to both encourage him and put him at ease, so I decided to feed his ego, just this once, "Very good. That is a mature, healthy, reaction to the angst brought on by the pictures. Good job. Now, I will show you pictures of the same women, but they will have neutral expressions on their faces. I then want you to be honest and tell me what you felt."

Dr. Cooper had repeated the actions he had taken with the previous pictures, down to carefully replacing them in their folder.

He took a while to speak, but when he did he was very matter-of-fact, "I still felt a bit uncomfortable, but no fight or flight."

I had smiled warmly at him. He was opening up more than I had hoped for and that would help both of us immensely. I continued to talk calmly and positively as I told him, "Thank you for being honest, Dr. Cooper. Now, I am going to show you these women with smiles on their faces. Again, I want an honest assessment of your feelings." I handed him the third folder.

Once again, he carefully studied them and replaced them in the appropriate folder.

Dr. Cooper looked extremely troubled at that point and revealed to me, "That was strange. The smiling women bothered me the most. It seemed I wanted to hit them or use some other form of violence against them."

I had made sure to note that on the legal pad and asked him, "Interesting. Now, I want you to tell me, why do you think those women were smiling?"

His eyes got big and he asked me, "Why?"

I nodded, "Yes, if you don't mind."

He began to recite reasons like a person who was drawing information from events in the past, "Maybe they are smiling because they are looking at their favorite child, or maybe they just forced someone to do what they wanted. Or perhaps they were smiling because they made you feel embarrassed or angry. Maybe they made you feel more alone."

I had then proceeded to scribble all this down hastily. That admission had been huge! I came over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. He didn't move away from my touch. I liked that for some reason. I informed him, "You do realize you just shifted the focus from them to yourself, don't you?"

"I did?" He had sounded truly shocked. "I don't believe I did."

I had reached into the pocket of my lab coat and played the tape recording I had been making back for him. His fact looked truly troubled. "I don't remember saying that. I have an eidetic memory but I truly cannot recall using those words."

I had reluctantly removed my hand from his shoulder and returned to the other side of the table. I explained that to him, "That is not uncommon, Dr. Cooper. Your conscious brain was being taken over by your subconscious."

He looked angry and dismissive at my suggestion. "That's pure hogwash! Taken over by whom?""

I remember looking over at him intently. A lot hinged on how he answered my next question, "You tell me. Who was talking there?"

Dr. Cooper thought hard and responded haltingly, "Me. But a much younger me. A 'me' that still had to listen and obey her." His eyes suddenly flashed and his mouth opened wide, "My god! I just realized I hated my mother then."

Now we were getting somewhere. I continued to gently interrogate him, "How do you feel about her now?"

He had looked over at me, an obvious hurt filling his eyes, "I love her, but only within certain parameters."

I wrote on the pad and avoided his gaze while I asked, "Such as?"

Dr. Cooper rose from his seat and began to pace around the room. "I will still obey her if the issue is not of utmost importance to me, but I will resent her for making me obey her."

I walked over to him and once again placed my hand on his shoulder, "Sheldon, you are an adult. No one can 'make' you obey them. It seems you may be stuck in an unhealthy pattern of behavior with your mother, one that will be difficult for you to change. That you don't give in on important issues gives me hope that that may change."

He had then stopped and faced me, "What is your plan for me?"

I once again dropped my hand from his shoulder and proceeded to inform him as to what we were going to do next, "My plan is going to be for both of us and I will discuss it with you further at dinner this Sunday."

He then hastily corrected me, "You mean Saturday."

I walked back over to the dissecting table and answered him in an apologetic voice, "No, Sunday. I do not want our meetings to disrupt your life any further than it already has been disrupted. That will not help our cause. Saturday or Sunday makes little difference to me, but it makes a great deal of difference to you. Therefore, Sunday at six is fine. This time, you pick the destination. You may call me with your plans before Friday evening. Is that fine with you?"

Dr. Cooper's face filled with relief and he replied, "Of course. By Friday I should have the entire evening planned."

I nodded and looked down at my watch, "Oh look, our hour is up. I will talk to you later in the week, Dr. Sheldon Cooper, and see you on Sunday."

He headed for the door and looked back at me with an inscrutable look on his face, "Agreed. I will talk to you later Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler." With that, he walked out the door. I had to admit to myself, the man looked fine from behind. And his shoulder hadn't felt bad beneath his shirts, either. I found myself very much looking forward to Sunday.

Thursday morning I walked down the hall towards Dr. Fowler's office with more than a little trepidation. Technically, I knew full well what CBT was and how it was used but I had no idea just how Dr. Fowler would choose to implement it. I faced her door and finally decided to knock on it. Anything was better than being late to an appointment. *knock, knock, knock*" Dr. Fowler." *knock, knock, knock* "Dr. Fowler." *knock, knock, knock* "Dr. Fowler."

To my mild surprise, I heard a friendly voice greeting me with, "Please come in, Dr. Cooper."

Feeling encouraged, I entered her lab and hailed her with "Good morning, Dr. Fowler." I asked her if we could proceed with our itinerary. There was no use beating around the bush, we had work to do. She nodded and pulled my file from the cabinet and informed me that she had been studying my MEG results and then began to list things to which I had reacted aversely. She then mentioned that two of them were not viable subjects for my therapy and therefore, we would not address them in our sessions.

That, of course, made me extremely curious. I took my former seat by her dissecting table and asked Dr. Fowler what those two things could be.

She put down my folder and exhaled softly, "Very well. It seems you have an extremely negative reaction to birds and airplanes. But those two things are not part of the problem Dr. Siebert has mentioned, so for now, we won't be discussing those."

That was fine. I had known about my fears in those areas, nothing new there. I still felt compelled to ask her, "What area or areas are we going to be dealing with today?" You could have knocked me over with a feather when Dr. Fowler stated that two of the things my brain had reacted to the strongest were pictures of middle aged women and women under the age of twenty five. I didn't know how to properly respond to that, so I have a nervous laugh and joked that these two types of people must have been my Achilles' heel.

Dr. Fowler then walked over to the filing cabinet and placed my file inside of it. She then turned to me and asked the strangest question, "Tell me, do you have a good relationship with your mother?"

My first reaction to that was to take offense, but my rational brain soon took over and I realized that this question, if answered truthfully, could be one of the keys that would soon get me back into my own office with my own files. So I told her that my current relationship with my mother was fine, but that in the past, it hadn't been that way at all.

Dr. Fowler had seemed excited by my answer and quickly grabbed a yellow legal pad and began writing on it. She then asked me if I could go into more detail about my relationship with my mother. I reluctantly agreed, I didn't want this woman to get the idea that I was going to follow her instructions blindly. That was never going to happen. Not in this lifetime, anyway.

She then almost cooed to me as she reassured me that I didn't have to expound on that subject, but that it would help in my therapy. So, I made the decision to cooperate. I informed her that my mother had often favored my twin sister and my brother when we were all younger. I went on to explain to the good Dr. that our relationship was much improved now, but I could see how that could have left mental scars. I then decided to put Dr. Fowler on the spot and I asked her, "Do you have a satisfactory relationship with _your_ mother?"

Her answer came very quickly, "No."

I then asked her for further details, this was getting very interesting. I had never had the chance to discuss my feelings regarding my mother with anyone before. My friends all liked my mother, so they didn't want to hear it. Neither of my siblings cared to rehash our childhood, either, so I always kept this to myself. Dr. Fowler then informed me that her mother had been oppressive, controlling, and extremely critical when she was growing up and that she still was. She then made a statement which caught my attention, she told me that her mother could no longer hurt her, so whatever had been between them in the past was immaterial. I wondered about that, but kept it to myself. Still, if that was so, why were our brain scans so similar? It seemed we both were still being affected by our mothers' past actions. Denial was more than a river in Egypt, my friends.

Dr. Fowler then attempted to change the subject, which was fine by me. She inquired as to what else my mother had done in the past, besides the favoritism. I responded by telling her of my mother's religious fervor and her attempts to use Jesus and the Good Book to control my behavior.

She gave a slight smile and asked me, "Is she ever successful?"

I answered in the negative and replied that my mother and I had pretty much agreed to disagree on that subject. Well, most of the time, anyway. I then decided to bring my thoughts out into the open and stated that it seemed we both had issues with our mothers.

Dr. Fowler answered with an unsure, "Perhaps." She had appeared to be rather unnerved by my statement and proceeded to pretend to study her notes. She then introduced the subject of how she was going to implement CBT in my therapy that day. Dr. Fowler explained to me that she would be showing me pictures of middle aged women who could be mothers. The first set, she told me, would show them scowling. I was to study these pictures and relate my accompanying feelings to Dr. Fowler. That seemed easy enough. She handed me a folder filled with pictures of women much like she had described to me; middle aged and scowling. I had studied them each carefully and when I was finished, I returned them to the folder.

My reaction to these pictures had surprised me. I had felt both anger and fear. I was torn between wanting to punch these ladies in the face or running as far away from them as was physically possible. Dr. Fowler had requested that I tell her my feelings when I was finished looking at the picture, so I was honest and told her that they made me feel very uncomfortable. I informed her of my fight or flight response. She commented that I would have been prevented from doing either in her lab, but in that, she had been incorrect. I could very well have walked over to the door and left and I informed her of that. I also told her that I had realized that they were just pictures and could do me no real harm, so I had stayed.

To my amazement, Dr. Fowler then told me that my reaction to these pictures had been both mature and healthy. Not very many people have said that to me in my lifetime. I surmised that Dr. Fowler had said those kind words to either speed up my therapy or because she had a kind heart. I supposed it was the first, but rather hoped it was the latter. She then went over to the file cabinet and pulled out another manila folder. This one contained pictures of women with bland expressions on their faces. She then gave me the same instructions she had given me with the other set, to study them and tell her of my feeling when I was done. That seemed simple enough.

I did as she had requested and when I had finished looking at them I informed her that while I still felt uncomfortable viewing these pictures; they did not affect me as strongly as the first set had. Dr. Fowler than gave me a nice smile and thanked me for being honest with her. I liked that for some reason. Her smile was very pretty. Drat! She was my therapist and she was working for Siebert, nothing about her should look 'pretty' to me. But it did. I was then handed a third folder and was asked once again to report my feelings to her when I was done.

Dear lord! It was a folder full of middle aged matrons with smiling faces. Smiling faces that I wanted so badly to slap, punch, or hit in some way. This violent reaction was not me at all. Why did I feel this strongly about pictures? Anyway, I did as I was told and informed Dr. Fowler of the strong feelings these pictures had conjured up in my mind.

Dr. Fowler then wrote something on her legal pad and asked me an odd question. "Interesting. Now, I want you to tell me, why do you think those women were smiling?" I had wanted her to reiterate that question because I wanted to be sure I had heard her correctly, so I asked her if 'why' had been the correct question. She affirmed that it had been, so I closed my eyes to better concentrate on my feelings.

Thoughts and feelings began to come back to me. My mother's obvious favoritism shown towards my siblings; the control she had attempted to wield over me, which sometimes continued even today; the snarky looks of pity or triumph she gave me whenever I lost my temper with her; all of these things came rolling back at me and crashing in my brain, much like waves upon a beach. I related all of these things to Dr. Fowler, as well as telling her how alone they had made me feel.

Dr. Fowler had then begun writing on her legal pad again. What followed next was exceedingly strange; she had walked over to me and put her hand on my shoulder. In spite of myself, I liked the feeling of that. But I wasn't about to let her know it, good lord, no. She then said something to me that I felt much deeper than her hand on my shoulder, she had told me, "You do realize you just shifted the focus from them to yourself, don't you?"

My head had jerked up in disbelief and I told her that I did not recall that at all. Dr. Fowler then produced a small tape recorder and played my words back to me. It seems that was indeed what I had done. I have always prided myself on having an eidetic memory, but this had gone deeper than that. I truly had no recollection of the words I had spoken. She explained to me that this was not an uncommon occurrence and that it had been my conscious brain being overtaken by my subconscious. Strange. The soft sciences had always confused me, but this seemed to make perfect sense to me the longer I thought about it. I told her it was pure hogwash, but I truly did believe her words, they just scared me to no small extent. I have always prided myself on being totally in control at all times, this little episode had proven to me that I wasn't.

Dr. Fowler took her hand off of my shoulder, which I found a bit disappointing and asked me to tell her who I thought was talking to her when I had answered her with words I couldn't recall. I thought long and hard about that one and then it suddenly came to me. The person who had responded to Dr. Fowler's question had been me, but me at a much younger age. A 'me' that was still under her control. Then it came to me like a bright flash of lightening, I had hated my mother at that age. Before I could get control of my tongue, I had admitted as much to Dr. Fowler.

"How do you feel about her now?" she had asked me.

I replied that in the present time I loved her with certain limits. She could not control me as much these days and this had led us to a more normal father/mother relationship.

However, Dr. Fowler wasn't going to let it go at that. She then asked me what those limits were. This woman was relentless and if she hadn't have been so pretty, I may have been offended. But Dr. Fowler _was_ kind and caring; she was just doing her job. Of course, I couldn't let her know that, but I was starting to like her quite a bit.

I had answered her truthfully, "I will still obey her if the issue is not of utmost importance to me, but I will resent her for making me obey her."

To my great surprise, Dr. Fowler came over to me and placed her calming hand on my shoulder once more. She had seen that these questions were making me more than a little upset. She concluded that as an adult, no one could make me do anything against my will. That I wouldn't give in on important issues was important, but that we still had to work on my unhealthy behavior patterns with my mother, especially my resentment towards her the times I did accede to her wishes.

That had all very perplexing to me and I asked her what the plan for my therapy was going to entail. To my delight, (did I say that?) she suggested we discuss this further over dinner that coming Sunday. I reminded her that we had last met on Saturday, but she actually told me that she wished to honor my usual schedule of doing my laundry on Saturday nights. Did I mention that I thought her a kind person who attempted to understand me?

Anyway, Dr. Fowler left the ball in my court in regards to the time and place of our next meeting. We settled on Sunday at six, but she left the decision of where to meet up to me. We agreed that I would call her before Friday evening with my decision and I reluctantly took my leave from her lab. I found myself very much looking forward to Sunday evening. As I walked down the hall towards the exit, I saw Bert from the Geology Department coming towards me. As I passed him, I found my hands balling up into fists at my sides and angry thoughts filling my head. Why was that? I hardly knew the man. Life was truly strange sometimes.

************************************************************************************* **It looks like things are going well for these two. But why did Sheldon have such a strong reaction to seeing Bert? Read the next installment and find out.**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Maybe So, Maybe Not

 **Our two scientists have a most interesting conversation at their next meeting.**

As I have always been a man of my word, I had called Dr. Fowler by Thursday afternoon with my suggestion for our dinner destination. As we had dined in Monrovia the last time we had shared a dinner out, I decided on somewhere closer to her apartment in Glendale. One of my favorite restaurants had always been Bob's Big Boy in Burbank as they had a most excellent cheeseburger there. So, in a burst of inspiration I called Dr. Fowler with my suggestion. To my great shock, she was not pleased.

"You want us to meet and have a personal discussion in a coffee shop patronized by the local high school and college crowds? Are you out of you mind?" she had screamed at me over the phone.

Screaming women have always put me on edge and I didn't want that to happen with Dr. Fowler. Therefore, I attempted to explain my position as calmly as possible, "As I recall, you left it up to me to choose the location of our next meeting. Are you going back on that promise?"

You could almost hear the anger leaving her as if a balloon were deflating, "No, Dr. Cooper. I said you should pick the spot so I will go along with it. But tell me, how are you going to get all the way to Burbank?"

I hadn't given that problem much thought, but I offered a solution to her in my kindest voice, "Well, I could take the bus, but I hate taking the bus. Way too many germs. I was thinking of taking a taxi out there. It will be a bit pricey, but you will not have to pick me up."

To my surprise, and reluctant admiration, Dr. Fowler came up with a most reasonable solution to the dilemma, "Let me suggests a compromise to you, Dr. Cooper. If you want to meet in a coffee shop, why don't we meet at Conrads in Pasadena? It is fairly close to you and a rather short drive for me. Plus, they have a wonderful little dining area in the back by the bar that is perfect for us to converse in. It is quiet and comfy with very nice roomy booths. What do you say?"

I had found myself agreeing with her most wholeheartedly, "I say fine. I know Conrads and you are right, the dining room in the back would suit our purpose quite well. So, I will see you there Sunday at six o'clock?"

Dr. Fowler then threw me a curveball, "What about your concerns of us running into one or more of your friends?"

I had thought a minute about that, but decided that the gain was well worth the risk. It wasn't so much that I didn't want my friends seeing me out with a female as much as it was that I didn't want to admit I was under the care of one of Siebert's minions. I came up with what I considered a more than satisfactory answer, "There is small chance of that. On Sundays they all usually get together and eat in at one of their residences or another."

Dr. Fowler countered that with, "Won't they notice you are absent?"

It seemed this woman had an answer for everything. So I tossed one out of my own, "Perhaps, but I will just tell them that I am meeting a fellow scientist for dinner to discuss a research project they are working on. When you think about it that is not far from the truth now is it?" Damn, I have a brilliant mind!

She had calmly replied, "I find that a perfect cover for our meeting. We do not need your friends interrupting us and impeding your progress. By the way, have you read Troilus and Criseyde?"

I had not wanted my friends interrupting our dinner, but I was beginning to have more reasons than an interference of my progress for my desire for us to left alone that night. The truth was, I was beginning to find Dr. Fowler a most interesting woman to converse with. Nothing more. It wasn't like I was becoming attracted to her or anything. At least that was what I kept telling myself. I realized I hadn't answered her question promptly, so I hastened to reply, "Yes I have. And I am prepared to discuss it with you in depth."

I could almost feel her smile over the phone as she added, "Good, I have also read Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and am also ready to fill you in on my thoughts concerning the book."

I suppose we could have talked much longer to each other, but I didn't want her to feel this was moving beyond a professional relationship, which I kept trying to convince myself it was not. I decided to end the phone conversation quickly, "Very well, I will see you on Sunday."

Her response was a curt, "Agreed. Goodbye, Dr. Cooper."

Mine was short as well, "Goodbye, Dr. Fowler."

True to his word, Dr. Cooper contacted me before Friday evening. I know now why, but back then I had no idea why my heart skipped a beat when I saw his number calling mine on Thursday afternoon. I answered in what I hoped was my calmest voice, "Hello, Dr. Cooper."

"Good afternoon, Dr. Fowler. As agreed by the two of us, I am calling to inform you of the plans I have made for our dinner destination on Sunday."

"Fine. What have you decided?" The man informed me that we were going to meet as Bob's Big Boy in Burbank. My heart sunk in disappointment. How were we going to converse about personal subjects in the middle of a crowded coffee shop? Regretfully, I told him this much, in a rather angry voice. I also found myself questioning his sanity.

Surprisingly, Dr. Cooper reminded me in a calm voice that we had agreed on him choosing the venue. I have to admit, when he used this kind tone of voice, a little bit of a Texas twang appeared, which was most intriguing to me. A sudden thought flitted through my brain and after I had admitted we had agreed to let him choose the venue I felt compelled to ask him, "How are you going to get all the way to Burbank?"

Dr. Cooper then mentioned either the bus or a taxi but I decided to come up with a better alternative to his choice and carefully suggested that we could meet at Conrads in Pasadena, which is one of my favorite coffee shops in the area. To my great relief, he agreed to meet there after I had explained that this establishment had a cozy, informal back room in which we could sit and have our discussion at our leisure. I suddenly remembered his previous concerns regarding running into any of his friends during out dinner. I reminded him of this, but he eased my concerns by stating, "Perhaps, but I will just tell them that I am meeting a fellow scientist for dinner to discuss a research project they are working on." I had to give the man this; his mind was an agile one. Something about that was very attractive to me, but I subdued that thought. Our dinners together were merely therapy for both of us, nothing more. Then why did my heart beat faster whenever we conversed on the phone? I felt almost like a giddy teenager, and that wasn't me at all.

I quickly covered my absurd feelings by inquiring of Dr. Cooper whether he had finished reading the Chaucer book. He replied in the affirmative and asked me if I had finished reading the massive tome that was the first Harry Potter book. I, too, answered affirmatively and informed him I was ready to discuss it with him at our dinner. In spite of my own doubts as to whether a children's book about a boy wizard could be engaging to me, I had to admit that I had somewhat enjoyed reading about Harry, his friends, teachers, and Hogwarts, but I did have concerns about the tale.. But I wasn't about to let him know this, so I kept my goodbye to him short and sweet, as was his to me. I couldn't put a name to what I was feeling, but I knew I would have to be very careful how I handled this from here on in.

As arranged, I took a taxi to Conrads and went in through the back door. I wasn't waiting for Dr. Fowler very long. Less than a minute after my arrival she appeared and we were seated in a most comfortable, semi-circular, booth. As we studied our menus I took stock of her appearance. Once again, she wore a flowered long sleeved shirt covered by a matching cardigan. Her skirt this week and been one of denim. She was dressed in a very similar fashion to our meeting the week before. I appreciate consistency, so I approved of this outfit very much.

After we had ordered, I decided to start our discussion off by asking her a question about our week's readings, "So, Dr. Fowler, did you enjoy reading your very first literary treat that is the tale of Harry Potter?"

Her answer floored me, "To be honest with you, I found the writing to be sophomoric and the story line to be extremely predictable. That being said, Harry Potter, the character, is a very fitting protagonist. His parents are dead, he is living with mean relatives, and he is saved by magic. Dr. Cooper, this story is merely a retelling of Cinderella from a male perspective. Still, I found the story engaging enough to finish the book. If I were enchanted by magic, which I am not, or had any fond memories of my times at school in my youth, I would have enjoyed this book. As it was, I believe the proper term is, I could take it or leave it."

I could not believe what my ears had heard and I let her know in no uncertain terms, "I can't believe you just dismissed one of the greatest tales of our modern times, after The Lord of the Rings."

Dr. Fowler's response seemed both pompous and smug, "Ah, yes, Tolkien's tale of friendship, camaraderie, and the quest for a ring. Sounds like a typical female group pursuing men for marriage."

I was in shock at her easy dismissal of Tolkien's superlative trilogy, "You find no enchantment with Tolkein's masterpiece?"

Once again, her tone was dismissive, "In a word, no. It was a very trite tale set in a mythological place. Interesting on a very basic level, but nothing spectacular. Very much like those Star Wars movies everyone raves about. I just cannot understand all the excitement. Male bonding over battle and power. The proverbial Good versus Evil. Yawn."

I was deeply disappointed in her attitude and replied, "I can see we have very different ideas as to what composes fine literature."

Our conversation was interrupted as we ordered our food. Once that was completed, Dr. Fowler had a question for me regarding my week's reading, "Not to change the subject, but what did you think of the Chaucer work?"

I was brutally honest, the same as she had been with Potter, "It was painful to read. You want to talk about fantasy? A man mocks the idea of love. He is punished for his beliefs by the God of Love to become infatuated with the town bad girl, who eventually leaves him for another. You want to talk about trite? That has my friend Leonard's relationship with his girlfriend, Penny, written all over it, though Leonard has never mocked love. He would have been far better off if he had. I say Criseyde was the one who deserved to suffer. A bit of a slut, she was."

Dr. Fowler's green eyes had sparkled as she explained, "Speaking as Yoda does not help you make your point with me. Troilus was punished for his mocking of love. Criseyde was merely the tool the gods used with which to punish him."

I countered that with my own, far superior, view, "Be that as it may, I did not enjoy this tale at all. Love and all that poppycock. If you set this story in our modern day times, Troilus would be a highly successful man in his chosen field and Criseyde would be a pole dancer or working some street corner or another, regardless of her father's high position. She would closely resemble one of the Kardashians."

Dr. Fowler narrowed her eyes and asked, "I see. So you approve of neither love nor sex?"

My answer went straight to the heart of the matter, "They both take a lot of time and trouble for a dubious return on your investment." There, that would be the end of all these strange feelings emanating from the both of us. I had no time for relationships, did I? No, I did not.

She nodded thoughtfully and asked me, "So you take a dim view of women of ill repute?"

Where did she get that idea from? I answered her truthfully, "Not at all, I actually rather admire them. They don't fool around with all that love business; they see the human physiological need for sex and cash in on it. I don't understand it, but I do respect them taking a pragmatic stance on it."

Dr. Fowler had looked a bit disturbed by my words and she informed me in a decidedly cold tone of voice, "You do understand that most women are forced into prostitution, do you not? Circumstances have made them vulnerable to some very bad men."

I only conceded part of that argument to her. There was no one-size-fits-all there, "You may be correct to some degree. However, I was not referring to those forced into the life against their will."

Her next question stunned me. I had no idea whatsoever it was coming, "I see. So you harbor no desire to ravish scantily clad women?"

I hastened to answer her truthfully, before those green eyes put me under their spell once more, "None whatsoever. Though between you and them, there is a happy medium."

Those same eyes narrowed and she asked me in a cold, clipped voice, "What about you? Speaking of how a person is clothed, why do you wear two shirts at the same time? Is that for protection from women or what?" Our food came at that exact moment, so our conversation was temporarily derailed.

I took a bit of my burger, swallowed, and informed her in no uncertain tone, "That is none of your business." I responded. And it wasn't. How I dressed was my decision, not hers. I'd seen how Penny had attempted to makeover Leonard and I wanted no part of that.

She almost gloated as she told me, "Actually, it is my business. As your therapist, I have every right to know the origins of your eccentricities."

I decided to show her that two could play that game. "Okay Miss Smarty Pants, as long as we're talking about obsessive layering, the only thing covered in more layers of cloth than you is a mummy!"

Her eyes grew wide and she spit out, "How dare you!" I'd really gotten to her with that comment.

I couldn't help it, I grinned a little and challenged her, "Oh, I dared all right. So answer that one if you have the guts."

Dr. Fowler put down her fork full of salad and replied, "You never answered _my_ question Dr. Cooper."

I sat back and crossed my arms over my chest. I was having a bit of fun now. "Who said I had to?"

Dr. Fowler took a sip of her iced tea and replied, "I did. Who said I had to answer yours?"

I grinned at her once again, "You're looking at him."

A sly smile spread across her face and I immediately grew uneasy. She looked across the table at me and stated, "I'll make a deal with you, Dr. Cooper. The next time we meet shall we both be dressed in a more, shall we say, provocative manner?"

I folded my napkin and looked her in the eyes, "Do you think you could handle that, Dr. Fowler?"

She wasn't fazed by my words. She responded to my question with another question, "Could _you_ , Dr. Cooper?"

I decided to take her up on her challenge. Actually, the idea of seeing Dr. Fowler in something a bit more revealing had an odd appeal for me, "I'll guess we'll just have to find out about that."

She nodded and gave me a curt, "All right."

I responded much the same, "All right."

Our waiter brought our bills and we both paid in cash, "Good." She told me.

I answered her back, "Good."

When we received our change, we both stood up and prepared to leave. Dr. Fowler shook my hand and said, "I'll see you next week. I suggest we meet back here at the same time."

I wasn't going to let her get away with that. I wanted to continue my therapy so I could go back to work. "We still have to meet on Thursday for the scans and more CBT, Dr. Fowler."

She had a suggestion that somehow made perfect sense, "Let's wait a week for the scans and see how our brains will be affected by the changes in our wardrobes. Just this week, I suggest we forego the CBT, also. I know this may set you back, but I think a truer reading of our progress will be obtained if we abstain from seeing each other until next Sunday."

I had no argument for that. Logic always won me over "Fine. I'll see you next week for dinner Dr. Fowler and then we will rescan each other and have our CBT session on Monday morning. Now, I bid you goodnight."

She nodded and gave me a short and crisp, "Goodnight, Dr. Cooper."

Being a gentleman from Texas, I couldn't let the lady leave like that. I felt compelled to ask, "Dr. Fowler?"

She stopped walking towards the door and turned to face me, "Yes?"

"May I walk you to your car? That is the gentlemanly thing to do."

Dr. Fowler gave me a bit of a smile and responded with a polite, "Of course Dr. Cooper. That will be fine."

Once at her car, she unlocked the doors. We looked at each other in a confused manner for a long second. I decided to take the bull by the horns and gave her a kiss on the cheek. I prepared myself to be smacked upside the head, but to my surprise, Dr. Fowler returned the gesture and planted a quick kiss on my cheek as she softly said, "Good night, Sheldon Lee Cooper."

As she drove off I had softly whispered to the night air, "Goodnight, Amy Farrah Fowler."

I had arrived at Conrads shortly after six o'clock. I had stopped to put fuel in my car on the way, so that made me a minute or so late. Thankfully, for one so punctual, Dr. Cooper made nothing of my tardiness and we were soon ensconced in a very comfortable booth that was shaped as a semicircle. I wondered if he would take offense if I sat a bit nearer to him. I had no desire to sit far across the table from him and have to raise my voice to a decibel level that would allow the entire establishment to hear our conversation. Besides that, he smelled very nice, much like baby powder. I found this very attractive and had to work hard to keep my mind on the business at hand.

Dr. Cooper had started off the conversation by inquiring as to whether I had enjoyed reading the Harry Potter book he had assigned me.

I had been torn between not creating waves and telling the truth. The truth won out, as it often did with me. I informed him that I found the writing to be sophomoric with a most predictable story line. I further outlined the story's similarities with the age old tale of Cinderella. Poor orphan living with cruel relatives who is saved by magic. That was fairly trite stuff, actually. I did tell him that I found the story interesting enough to finish, even though magic holds no attraction for me. I am a scientist, after all. I also hold no fond memories of my school days, so a book set mainly at a school held little warm fuzzies for me. Still, I had read worse, I suppose.

Dr. Cooper appeared shock at my review of this book and called it 'one of the greatest tales of our modern times, after The Lord of the Rings.' I found that pronouncement ludicrous and compared Tolkien's tale of camaraderie and questing for a ring to that of a group of women scheming to find men to marry them.

At that, Dr. Cooper's large blue eyes got even wider and he asked me if I had not found the story full of enchantment. Once again, I was honest and informed that, no, I had found very little enchantment with that trilogy. I believe I called it a trite tale set in a mythological place with nothing spectacular to offer me. I had found it as boring as the Star Wars movies most people find fascinating. Male bonding over territory and power? Good versus Evil? Gee, _that_ had never been done before. I remember giving a faux yawn to emphasize my point.

His face had looked sad as he pointed out the obvious, that our ideas as to what composed fine literature differed greatly. At that moment our waitress came to take our order, his usual cheeseburger and a chicken/pecan salad for me. When we had finished ordering our food, I asked Dr. Cooper what he had thought of Troilus and Criseyde. His response had been as honest as mine and he told me it had been painful for him to read as he considered it as much of a fantasy as I had thought the Potter book was. He compared the male being punished for mocking love by falling for Criseyde to his friend's complex relationship, though he informed me his friend had never mocked the idea of love. Dr. Cooper believed that it was Criseyde who should have been punished, not Troilus. He even went so far as to call her a slut!

I had been more than a little aggravated by his answer, though I had to respect his honesty. I attempted to explain to him that Troilus had been punished for mocking love and that Criseyde had merely been the god's tool they used for that punishment. He responded by saying he did not enjoy the story and went so far as to call it poppycock. He did make an interesting point, though. He declared that if that story had been set in our time, Troilus would be a very successful man and Criseyde would be a woman of some ill repute, or much on the same level as the, shudder, Kardashians.

I decided to challenge him, so I inferred that he approved of neither love nor sex. I was confident he would refute that, but to my great surprise, he did not. He explained that both required a large investment of time and trouble for little return. I thought he was being a tad too emphatic about that for it to be entirely true. This spoke directly to his scans. Any thought of love or sex was immediately quashed. I saw then how much work there was left for us to do. I then went for the jugular and asked him whether he took a dim view of prostitutes, which he insisted he most definitely did not. He claimed he admired their pragmatic handling of the human physiological need for sex, though he made sure I understood he did not suffer from that need at all. This was getting meaty, the kind of work I loved to sink my teeth into. This was almost as good as the man who sent naked pictures to the students. I was close to salivation at this point.

I faked a look of disappointment and reminded him that most women in prostitution were not there of their own free will. They were trapped in that lifestyle due negative circumstance that made them beholden to men who readily took advantage of them. Dr. Cooper looked a bit guilty at that point, but soon recovered and informed me he had not been referring to the ones who were employed in the sex industry against their will. I poked further into his brain and asked him, "I see. So you harbor no desire to ravish scantily clad women?" This was getting fun.

He responded to my question with, "None, whatsoever. Though between you and them, there is a happy medium."

That reply had led to a heated discussion over how we both were dressed. I asked him why he always wore two shirts at once and he countered by comparing my layered clothing with that of a mummy. We came to the conclusion that we would both dress a little less conservatively the next time we met. We both paid our bills and I informed him that we would meet there on the next Sunday to unveil our new looks. Dr. Cooper then reminded me that we were scheduled to meet on that Thursday for our next CBT session. I suggested that we skip that session and meet for CBT and MEG on that Monday to better gauge our reactions to seeing each other dressed more provocatively. He agreed to that and we prepared to leave Conrads. Dr. Cooper insisted on walking me to my car, which set my heart to beating wildly, though I tried very hard to hide that fact from him. I did not want him to think I had any feelings but professional ones for him. He had none for me that much was clear, so I didn't want to set myself up to get hurt.

When we had reached my car an uncomfortable silence occurred. I unlocked my car and was thinking of making a quick exit when Dr. Cooper did something completely unexpected, he gave me a soft kiss on my cheek. I was in shock, but decided that it was time to make my own move. I returned that gesture and gave him a small peck on the cheek as well and told him, "Good night, Sheldon Lee Cooper." Why I used his full name I have no idea, even now. I entered my car and drove off in haste, but not so hastily that I didn't see him following my car with his eyes as I left the parking lot. What was going on here and how was I supposed to wait patiently until next Sunday?

 **Something seems to be happening between these two. I wonder if either of them will admit it to themselves or anyone else. Oh, I just remembered, no one saw the two of them together. Right? Wrong.**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Sheldon to the Rescue

 **The morning after. We've all been there.**

When I arrived home that night I found the apartment empty. I had surmised that Leonard and Penny were still at Howard and Bernadette Wollowitz's home where they had informed me they would be spending the evening. I grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and headed for my room as I hadn't felt like dealing with anyone right then. In all honesty, I wanted to be alone with my thoughts.

And those thoughts drifted to Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler and her quick mind, soothing voice, and lovely green eyes. Never in my life had a woman occupied so much space in my mind. She wasn't the most beautiful woman I had ever known. If I wanted to be honest, Leonard's girlfriend, Penny, was more physically attractive. But Penny lacked Dr. Fowler's keen mind, warm smile, patience, and pleasing manner. Penny was sorely lacking in those qualities and it always amazed me that Leonard, a man of no small intellect, found her attractive. I highly doubted whether Penny even knew who Chaucer was, much less what books he had written. Discussing said books would have been completely beyond her. The woman read People magazine like it was the Bible. I shook my head in an effort to clear it. Penny was soon completely out of my thoughts. I wanted Dr. Fowler to leave my mind in the same way and let it return to science.

But she wouldn't leave. I could still feel her soft lips on my cheek and the soft scent of her perfume. I wondered to myself why I had kissed her first. I told myself it was because I had been raised to be a gentleman, but that wasn't it. I had to face the fact that I had kissed her cheek because I had wanted to show Dr. Fowler a token of my affection. Wait. I felt affection for her? She was my therapist. And she had the most amazing mind I had ever encountered. Hadn't our MEG scans been almost identical? It was all so confusing. I had never in my life been attracted to any woman in any romantic sense, so I did not think this was me getting romantic over Dr. Fowler. It couldn't be, could it? Anyway, after much tossing and turning I finally fell asleep and stayed that way until my alarm went off in the morning.

When I awoke the next morning I suddenly remembered that after Dr. Fowler had driven away I had picked something up from the ground that she had dropped as she had entered her car. I went over to my bureau and checked my wallet. Yes, there it was, her driver's license had somehow fallen out of her purse. I decided then and there to catch a ride to the university with Leonard and return Dr. Fowler's driver's license to her. To that end, I took a quick shower and got dressed before Leonard had a chance to leave for work.

I was on my second cup of tea when Leonard emerged from his bedroom. He greeted me with a sly smile and a hearty, "Hey, Sheldon. You dog, you!"

I remember being completely confused, asI had no idea what his greeting had meant. I had not grown long ears and a tail overnight, so this was a puzzle to me. "Good morning to you, as well, Leonard. And whatever did you mean by that outburst?"

Leonard poured himself a cup of coffee and attempted to call my bluff, "Come on, Sheldon. Penny and I saw you last night leaving Conrads with a female companion as we were arriving. What's going on here? Why haven't you informed us that you have a lady friend?"

My mind did its usual brilliant work and I responded, "I have told you nothing for the simple reason there is nothing to tell. You merely saw me leaving the restaurant with a fellow scientist. We had met there to go over a research project we are both involved with. I am very sorry to disappoint you and Penny, but there is nothing 'going on' between us but science." That was the truth, even if some key factors had been omitted.

My friend took a sip of his coffee, put down his cup, and challenged my story with, "Don't give me that, buddy. We saw you kiss her on the cheek, and vice versa."

I had given him one of my classic eye rolls and told him, "Leonard, I was only being a gentleman seeing a lady to her car. I was raised in Texas, we are taught to do that."

"You've never done that for me." I heard Penny speak as she, too, emerged from Leonard's bedroom. No doubt they had once again spent the night together for the sake of coitus.

I decided to nip her questions in the bud. Penny was far more intuitive than Leonard and it would never do for her to ask too many questions about what they had seen the night before. "Penny, need I remind you that you are not a fellow scientist. Besides, you have Leonard around to take care of such things for you."

She grabbed some coffee for herself and eyed me over the top of her cup, "Whatever, Sheldon. I still think there's more to this than you're telling us. But I'm patient. I can wait."

What could I do? I decided to counter that with, "I do believe you will have to possess the patience of Job. Truly, there is nothing going between us but two scientists meeting to discuss the proving of a mutual hypothesis."

Leonard walked to the door and picked his keys up from out of the bowl on the nearby table, "If you say so. Well, I've got to get going. Work calls. Hey, are you working on getting your job back at all?"

I nodded in pretended nonchalance, "Of course, Leonard. That is my top priority. Oh, by the way, could you give me a lift to Cal Tech? I have business to take care of there."

He had motioned me to join him, "Sure, no problem. Penny, I'll see you later tonight. Come on, Sheldon. Let's get going or I'm going to be late. I don't want Siebert firing me as well."

When I had arrived back at my apartment I took mental stock on what had happened back at the restaurant. I had taken a purely professional relationship and crossed boundaries that should never have been crossed. I had kissed Dr. Cooper on the cheek. Why had I done that? Because he had kissed me on the cheek first and, damn it, I had liked it. The question now was what next? Did I terminate our professional relationship? Dr. Siebert would not like that because Dr. Cooper would then have to be under the care of a public therapist. Wait a minute. I was not a licensed therapist so perhaps the usual rules and limitations did not apply to me. I certainly was neither a psychologist nor a psychiatrist. I was a research neurobiologist. We took no oaths and we were governed by no privacy laws. I exhaled. Under the circumstances I was operating under, I could freely continue to see and treat Dr. Cooper. A smile of relief appeared on my face at that thought. I would not have to quit talking to him or testing him. I actually enjoyed how we challenged each other mentally. No man had ever done that before. As long as I kept our interactions to casual conversations, testing, and professional discussions, I saw no harm in continuing to see Dr. Cooper with his amazing mind and delicious blue eyes. That being settled in my mind, I prepared myself for bed and the coming day.

The next morning I had gotten up, had my coffee, showered, and gotten myself ready for the work day ahead. I went down to my car and looked in my wallet and suddenly discovered my driver's license was missing! Well, I hadn't wanted to be late for work, so I made the decision to drive to work anyway and just be careful on the way there. When I arrived at my office I pulled out my phone and was preparing to make a phone call to Conrads to inquire as to whether anyone had turned in my phone, when a knock had come on the door.

"Amy? Are you in there? I need to ask you something."

It had been Bert. Of all the bad timing… I called out, "Just a minute. I'll be right there." and put my phone back in my purse.

I had casually walked over to the door and opened it to find a very angry looking Bert staring at me in a most unsettling way. "Won't you come in?" I had asked him as I tied back my hair and put on my lab coat. I hadn't the foggiest idea of what was bothering him, but I had the distinct impression I would soon find out.

"I saw you last night, Amy." He said in a threatening voice.

"Doing what?" I really didn't have time for this. I had to call the restaurant.

"Having dinner with that weird Dr. Cooper." Bert was calling someone else weird? That was a laugh.

I tried to calm him down, "Bert, it wasn't a social dinner, believe me."

He moved closer to me and said, "I saw you kiss him."

I backed away from him slowly, "Bert, I kissed him on the cheek. What is the matter with you?"

His face went red and his voice rose as he answered me, "What's the matter? I'll tell you what the matter is. You always blow me off when I ask you to dinner or lunch, but then I see you out to dinner with someone else and you kissed them goodbye!"

I was now getting a little worried about the situation and I tried to answer as steadily as I could, "Bert, calm down. I told you already, it wasn't a social dinner. It was business."

He then grabbed my arm, not tightly, but I was getting scared. His voice got even louder and as he questioned me, "Business? You and Dr. Cooper don't work together. He's on leave from the school, in fact. What kind of work are you collaborating on? You work for entirely different departments!"

"Bert, stop it and let go of my arm. You have no right to question me this way. I am not your girlfriend, we are…"

Bert's anger continued to rise as he spat out, "Yeah, I know, just good friends. That's all I am to you, just a friend. Do you know how much it hurt to see you with him? Do you?" Bert grabbed a hold of my other arm then and began to back me up across the room. At this point I was beyond terrified.

Suddenly the door opened and Dr. Sheldon Cooper ran over to Bert and yelled, "Let go of her! You have no right to touch her!"

Bert gave a laugh and answered him, "Dr. Cooper, I wondered how long it would take you to get here. What are you, her knight in shining armor? From what I've heard, you're a little too cowardly for that. Why don't you just leave?"

Dr. Cooper repeated his request, "Bert, let go of her…now!"

Bert actually snarled at him, "Get out of here, Dr. Cooper. This has nothing to do with you."

Sheldon's face got as red as Bert's and he said, "I'll show you who the coward is!" as he connected with a roundhouse right to Bert's chin. I wouldn't say Bert fell down, but he did stumble backwards and let me go. I bolted for the door and ran smack into Dr. Siebert, and he did not look one bit pleased.

After Leonard and I had arrived at Cal Tech, I headed straight for Dr. Fowler's lab. I had surmised that by this time she had realized that her driver's license was missing and I wanted to set her mind at ease. I hurried towards the biology building and let myself in through a side door. I wanted to minimize the chances of being discovered on campus by Dr. Siebert. During my leave I was not supposed to set foot on the campus, but this situation was not work related at all. I was merely returning lost property to its rightful owner. Surely no one could find fault with that.

With that in mind, I made my way through the maze of halls that made up the biology building and soon found myself a few doors down from Dr. Fowler's office. I was both eager to see her and give her back her license. Both of these thoughts brought a smile to my face until I was outside of her lab. Once there, I heard two raised voices coming from within and I cracked open the door in an effort to better hear what was going on inside. What I heard turned on every alarm in my body.

Bert was accosting Dr. Fowler because he had seen us together. He wasn't merely raising his voice to her, no, it was much worse. Through the crack in the door I saw him grab her wrists and use his considerable height and weight advantage to push Dr. Fowler backwards across the room. At the sight of this, primal east Texas came alive in my mind and all I could think was, "That varmint done laid his hands on my woman!" Now, where I got the idea that Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler was my woman and why I referred to Bert as a varmint, I do not know. I just know that seeing Bert manhandling her brought something up from my subconscious I had thought long buried. Fight or flight. I was going to fight. Enraged seemed to be the correct term for my feelings at that moment and I acted on it.

I entered the lab and demanded that Bert release Dr. Fowler, which he did not. Instead, he responded by making slurs on both my bravery and my manhood. He went so far as to call me a coward and tell me to leave the room. That was his first mistake, a coward I am not. I once again demanded that he let go of Dr. Fowler's wrists and once again, Bert told me to leave, that the matter did not concern me. I don't remember much after that, except that I feared for Amy's safety. That fear propelled me to do something I had never done before; I landed a right handed punch squarely on Bert's jaw. Now, that did not drop him, not even close. But it did make him stagger backwards and release Dr. Fowler's wrists.

Once free, Amy ran to the door in an attempt to flee far away from Bert's anger, but she didn't make it very far. As she ran through the door, she ran into the man who had put me on administrative leave because of my anger issues. The same man who had just seen me punch Bert in the face. The same man who wanted me scanned for any psychological abnormalities. I knew at that point I was joined to another object by an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis. In other words, I was screwed. I attempted to smile at Dr. Siebert but he merely glared at me. This was not looking good at all. I decided to keep smiling and pray…a lot. Where was my mother when you needed her?

 **Uh oh. Now what? It looks like Sheldon may be in big trouble for doing the right thing.**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: It's Like This…

 **I believe Sheldon has some 'splainin' to do.**

Dr. Siebert had then glared at everyone in the room and asked in a strident voice, "May I kindly ask what just went on here? I do believe I just observed Dr. Cooper striking Bert in the face. Need I remind you that you are on academic leave in order for you to deal with your anger issues, Dr. Cooper. I can see you have not made much progress."

Dr. Cooper just stood there with a vapid smile on his face. I was having none of that. The man had rescued me from a potentially threatening situation. I turned to Dr. Siebert and attempted to explain, "Dr. Siebert, Sheldon did nothing wrong. He did not act out of anger but out of a protective instinct the male of the species most times possesses when confronted with a female in peril."

"Oh come on, Dr. Fowler! What 'peril' were you in? I only see you, Dr. Cooper, and Bert here. Surely you weren't in danger from Bert? He is one of the mildest mannered scientists in this entire university."

"Bert, for some unknown reason, put his hands on my person in a most threatening manner. Dr. Cooper never intended to hurt Bert, but to get him to release me, which is exactly what happened."

"Dr. Kibbler laid his hands on you? I find that hard to believe, Dr. Fowler."

A voice chimed in from behind Dr. Siebert, "Well, believe it. I am the person mostly responsible for this course of events." The voice belonged to Dr. Rebecca Gerber from the pharmaceutical department. I recognized her voice immediately from a lecture she had once given at a symposium I had attended. Her voice was at once high pitched and melodious with a cute southern accent. It was most recognizable and charming.

"Excuse me, Dr. Gerber, but how are you responsible for what happened here?"

"As you most likely know, Dr. Siebert, I am conducting experiments to develop synthetic male hormones with fewer side effects. I guess I can scratch this latest batch off of my list."

"Dr. Kibbler was a guinea pig for one of your experiments?"

"Guinea pig is not a word I would use, Dr. Siebert. Bert volunteered for this study."

Bert continued to sit in the chair he had more or less fallen into and stroked his chin gingerly. He did not seem to be fully aware of any of the other people in the room. His expression telegraphed great confusion and angst.

I liked what she was saying, so I told her, "Continue, Dr. Gerber."

"Thank you, Dr. Fowler. Bert heard of my studies and wanted to volunteer his services. Don't get mad at this, Amy, but he wanted to become more macho to attract your attention. I think I gave him a dose that was much too high, but I thought it appropriate for his size. I guess I'll have to go back to my lab and recalibrate the dosages."

Sheldon responded to this with a rare show of sarcasm, "Oh really?" He was rubbing his unsurprisingly swollen knuckles tenderly. I felt extreme sympathy for him, though I hadn't encouraged him to use violence against Bert at all. "How's your hand?" I managed to croak pitifully. Playing the Damsel in Distress had never suited me and this situation had not changed that one bit. I walked over to where was standing to get a closer look at any and all damages he had incurred while defending me.

Out of nowhere, Bert spoke up, "What happened? How did I get in your lab and why is my chin sore?"

Dr. Gerber answered him in a very regret-filled voice, "Bert, you had a rather bad reaction to those steroids I gave you. You got a little aggressive with Dr. Fowler and Dr. Cooper prevented that from going to far."

He looked from her to me to Dr. Cooper and asked, "What did I do?"

I answered him in my usual calming voice; I did not want to set him off again, "That doesn't matter, Bert. You weren't yourself and I am more than ready to forget about it. Becca, I think the next time you try this steroid out on a human being, it should be in a more controlled environment."

Dr. Gerber nodded in agreement and gave a most sincere apology, "You're right, Amy. I'm so sorry this happened and I accept full responsibility. It's just that I'm really fond of Bert and I wanted to help him."

Bert's head did a quick swivel and he asked her, "You're fond of me. What does that mean?"

Becca looked down at the ground and mumbled, "I was hoping Dr. Fowler would turn you down and you'd decide to date me."

Bert's face lit up with a big smile and replied to her admission with a question, "You would date me?"

She slowly raised her head and told him, "Well, it would have to be without the steroid influence. I liked you quite a lot the way you were."

Bert had a confession of his own to make. "Becca, I think we should go back to your lab and talk about this. I never knew this. If you had told me you liked me before last week, I never would have taken the darn stuff. I have always liked you, a lot. But you never said anything to me. Amy was my second choice. Sorry, Amy."

I looked over at him and gave him a big smile, "That's quite all right, Bert. We're good."

Becca took hold of his arm and guided him towards the door, "You're right, Bert. We need to go back to my lab and talk. And then maybe go somewhere for lunch together?"

As they walked out the door, I heard him say, "Cool. I'd like that. Are you free to go to a rock show this weekend?"

She stopped and looked up at him, "I'm more of a country music fan myself, but sure" Catching Bert's look she corrected herself, "Oh, a _rock_ show. I'd love to!" They then continued out the door and down the hall, headed for her office.

Dr. Siebert took it all in and had this to say after they had left, "It seems your therapy has done little to help Dr. Cooper. He is still exhibiting anti-social traits and mannerism. I'm afraid this experiment has come to its end."

I held up a hand and countered that with, "Wait a minute, Dr. Siebert. I would say it is helping Dr. Cooper quite a bit. Your main complaint to me was that Dr. Cooper was very self-centered and rude to others, am I correct?

He gave me a quick nod of his head, "Yes. That is why I sent him to you. What are you getting at here?"

I looked over at Sheldon and smiled. I then turned back to Dr. Siebert and continued making my point, "That version of Dr. Cooper would never have stuck his neck out to save anyone else but himself, would he?

Dr. Siebert scratched his chin as he thought for a moment, and then replied to my argument with, "Now that you mention it, no."

Seeing as how I now had the advantage I pushed on, "Bert is a much larger man than Dr. Cooper, yet that did not stop him from stepping in and helping someone he has not known very long. May I add that Bert could have easily pulverized him. I think Dr. Cooper acted in a very selfless way. He is not where you would like him to be, yet. However, he has made great strides under my care and this incident only highlights the personal growth he is experiencing."

Dr. Siebert had broken out in a warm smile and agreed with me, "You have made a very salient point, Dr. Fowler." He turned to Sheldon and told him, "I am actually quite impressed by your actions here today, Dr. Cooper. What do you say you return to work immediately, as long as you stay under the care of Dr. Fowler for the foreseeable future.

Sheldon's grin was even wider than his, "I have no problem with that, Dr. Siebert."

Siebert nodded and returned his smile. "Nor do I."

Sheldon then asked him, "May I kindly ask for the return of my key? Oh, do I still have to teach that class? Realistically speaking, I am not really suited for that sort of assignment."

Siebert reached deep into his pocket and pulled out something that was shiny and silver. He walked over to where Sheldon was standing and dropped the object into his open hand, "Here is the key to your office, Dr. Cooper. I am only authorizing you to return to your research work. Dr. Koothrappali has taken over your class and is doing quite nicely. I will say this once, and forever more stay silent on the matter. Dr. Cooper, you are a most excellent researcher, the best at this institution. But, you are one of the worst instructors I have ever seen. In the future, your duties will be solely focused on research. Have I made myself clear?"

Sheldon nodded and accepted those terms, "Very clear, Dr. Siebert. I promise you, I will never again teach a class at this university."

"Is that a promise?" Dr. Siebert asked him.

Sheldon's smile was so wide you'd have thought he won the lottery. He reassured Dr. Siebert with, "I can draw up a contract stating just that."

Siebert nodded and in a brusque voice told him, "Do that, Dr. Cooper and have it in my office by the end of the week."

Sheldon's voice was just as cut and dried. The time for warm fuzzies was over. "Very well. Good day, Dr. Siebert."

"Good day, Dr. Cooper." As he was heading for the door, Siebert had one more flash of human kindness and he turned his head back towards me and said, "Keep up the good work, Dr. Fowler. You will find a little something extra in your next paycheck."

After he had left, Dr. Cooper came over to me and took me in his arms. He smiled sweetly at my look of shock and told me, "You heard the man, Amy. You have to keep up the good work."

I looked up at him and asked "Does the 'good work' include kissing?"

Sheldon lowered his head towards mine, "Oh, I'm quite sure it does."

I don't remember much of what happened after that. I just know I discovered that Dr. Cooper was quite a good kisser for someone with no experience in that department. Dinner was also moved up to that night from the coming Thursday. Before Sheldon left to return to his beloved office, we made a date for dinner at The Cheesecake Factory in Pasadena. I couldn't wait to show him my new look. Maybe our date wouldn't stop at kissing.

For the first time in my life, my amazing brain had failed me. I hadn't been able to do or say anything in response to Dr. Siebert's glaring wrath. Through my mental haze, I had heard Dr. Siebert asking us just what had occurred in Dr. Fowler's lab. He mentioned, to my great sorrow, that he had, indeed, witnessed me hitting Bert on the chin. I really had no answer to that. What was I going to say to him? That I was defending a woman who was growing very near and dear to me? What if Dr. Fowler didn't like that? I would have looked ridiculous on top of looking like your typical macho male, which was a thought that repulsed me. As I had no good defense for my actions, I kept my mouth shut. Dr. Siebert went on to say, "Need I remind you that you are on academic leave in order for you to deal with your anger issues, Dr. Cooper. I can see you have not made much progress." My mortification at that point was now complete.

To my great surprise, Dr. Fowler then stepped up to the plate and defended my actions. She informed Siebert that I was not at fault in that situation. She went on to explain my actions with, "Sheldon did nothing wrong. He did not act out of anger but out of a protective instinct the male of the species most times possesses when confronted with a female in peril." I loved how she put that and I shot her a look of great gratitude.

Dr. Siebert disagreed with her as he thought Bert, for all his great size, was no threat to anyone because of his usual docile nature. Once again, Dr. Fowler defended my actions by relating Bert's threatening actions to him. I was growing fonder of this woman by the minute.

Siebert still had his doubts and responded that he found it hard to believe Bert had grabbed her. I was about to find my voice again and inform him that Bert did, indeed, have his hands on Amy, but before I could do that, I heard a female voice from behind Siebert reply that that she was the primary cause of Bert's aggressive actions.

He continued his rant with "Excuse me, Dr. Gerber, but how are you responsible for what happened here?"

I had looked towards the door and saw a small woman with a pleasing face and short dark hair explain to him that she had given Bert a dose of some synthetic hormone she had been developing in her own lab. This woman's admission helped my mind come completely out of its fog as all the pieces of this puzzle suddenly came together in my head. The concoction she had given Bert had most likely caused his behavior to change in what had been a most disturbing manner.

She addressed Siebert's question with, "As you most likely know, Dr. Siebert, I am conducting experiments to develop synthetic male hormones with fewer side effects. I guess I can scratch this latest batch off of my list."

Dr. Siebert asked this lady in a very unkind voice, "Dr. Kibbler was a guinea pig for one of your experiments?"

Dr. Gerber, that was her name, went on to explain to him that Bert had willingly volunteered for this experiment in an effort to impress Amy. That fact did not sit very well with me, but I had known better than to interfere in the conversation at this point. As for Bert, he continued to sit slumped in a chair, rubbing his chin over and over. I supposed I must have hit him fairly hard. That thought was not an unpleasant one for me.

I then heard Dr. Fowler ask her to continue and Dr. Gerber went on to explain that Bert had wanted to use these steroids in an attempt to woo Amy. She confessed that she may have given him too high of a dose and that she would have to recalibrate the dosages. I couldn't help myself, I responded with a very caustic, "Oh really?"

Amy, I saw no sense in the formality of calling her Dr. Fowler any longer, came over and inquired as to the condition of my hand, which was quite bruised and swollen. Bert had a very sturdy jaw, much sturdier than my hand. Speaking of Bert, he finally found his voice and asked in a very confused manner what had happened and why did his chin hurt. Dr. Gerber explained the entire situation to him by telling him that he had gotten a tad aggressive with Amy while under the influence of her steroid mixture.

Amy then came over and reassured Bert that she did not hold his actions against him. She then admonished Dr. Gerber to be more careful in the future as to how she conducted her experiments. I hoped that would settle the matter to everyone's satisfaction and I could then be alone with Amy.

Surprisingly, Dr. Gerber admitted she had done this for Bert because she was very fond of him and wanted to help him. Bert, of course, was not expecting this and asked her what exactly she meant by fond. She stared at the ground in an embarrassed way and admitted that she was hoping Amy would turn him down and that he would decide to date her.

Bert's face lit up like the Fourth of July and he inquired of Dr. Gerber, "You would date me?"

Dr. Gerber then admitted that she had liked him very much the way he was before the steroids. I found this hard to believe, but, once again, I had decided to keep quiet.

To my great surprise, Bert admitted that he had always liked her, even more than he had liked Amy. So, the two lovebirds retreated to her office to talk more and plan some sort of lunch date or another. I was just glad he was gone, so I didn't really pay attention to where they were going. Suffice it to say, I was relieved Bert's affections were no longer targeted at Amy, but at someone else.

However, we were still left with Dr. Siebert to deal with, and this was most likely not going to be pleasant. His face still held a scowl of disapproval on it. He gave Amy a hard stare and told her, "It seems your therapy has done little to help Dr. Cooper. He is still exhibiting anti-social traits and mannerism. I'm afraid this experiment has come to its end."

Once more, Amy came to my defense. This lady was a champion! She then explained to Dr. Siebert that my actions actually showed much improvement from my earlier anti social ways. She put it like this, "That version of Dr. Cooper would never have stuck his neck out to save anyone else but himself, would he?"

Dr. Siebert conceded that point to her and Amy, smart girl that she is, knew when she had the upper hand and continued with, "Bert is a much larger man than Dr. Cooper, yet that did not stop him from stepping in and helping someone he has not known very long. May I add that Bert could have easily pulverized him. I think Dr. Cooper acted in a very selfless way. He is not where you would like him to be, yet. However, he has made great strides under my care and this incident only highlights the personal growth he is experiencing."

Siebert's dour countenance suddenly change and his face broke out in a huge smile. He had taken in Amy's words and told me he was impressed by my actions. Siebert then informed me I could return to work immediately and that I had to stay under the care of Dr. Fowler for some time. Hey, my mother didn't raise a fool. I quickly accepted his offer. I had my job back and I could keep seeing Amy! I then asked him for the return of my key, which he graciously produced from his pocket and handed over to me. I then asked him if I had to continue teaching the underclassmen as I did not feel comfortable or well suited in the role of instructor. He informed me that another one of my friends, Raj Koothrapalli, had taken over that class and was doing very well with it. That was a great relief to me as teaching undergrads was my idea of pure, unadulterated hell and all the meetings in the world with Amy were not going to change that.

Dr. Siebert agreed with me and we agreed that I would draw up a contract stating that my future employment at Cal Tech would be limited to research only. I was told to have the contract in Siebert's office by the end of the week and that was that. Siebert admonished Amy to keep up the good work and then left. I was now alone with Amy. A million thoughts on what I should do and say ran through my mind at once. I decided to use Siebert's parting words to Amy to my advantage. I walked over, took her into my arms and told her, "You heard the man, Amy. You have to keep up the good work."

Those amazing green eyes that I had been unable to get out of my mind began to sparkle and she asked me, "Does the 'good work' include kissing?"

I had quickly assured her that it most likely did and I then did something I had never done before, I began to kiss a woman. Oh, not just any woman. I found myself kissing the most beautiful, perfect, intelligent and wonderful woman in the entire world, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. I lost myself in that kiss for what seemed an eternity but was most likely just a few minutes or so. As our kiss ended, we made plans to meet that night at The Cheesecake Factory. So what if any of my friends saw us! I wanted to show this magnificent woman off to them and everyone else in the world! I then admitted to myself I was in love. Deeply, forever, and hopelessly in love with a brilliant woman with the most enchanting green eyes in the universe. I could hardly wait until later that night to unveil my new look to her. I had hoped that maybe after dinner, we wouldn't have to stop at kissing.

 **It looks like our two scientists have developed feelings for each other. What next? I suppose we could eavesdrop on that date…**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Temperatures Rising

 **First date jitters? Oh yeah.**

I had spent the rest of the morning walking on air. Dr. Sheldon Cooper had not only protected me from Bert, he'd given me the first romantic kiss of my life! As hard as I tried, I could not stay focused on my work. A pair of deep blue eyes and a set of sensual lips kept invading my thoughts. Finally it was lunch time and I had headed out to the mall to find something appropriate to wear for tonight's dinner date. Yeah, you heard me right, I called it a date. And it was. Though at that point I had fully intended to keep helping Sheldon with his therapy, this had nothing to do with that. That night was all about the two of us exploring these wonderful new feelings that had developed between the two of us.

I had entered the mall with a little trepidation and looked around at all the fashions. Sheldon had challenged me to show more skin, but I was hardly ready to appear half naked like most of the mannequins in the store windows. Suddenly, my eye had caught the perfect outfit in a casual clothing boutique. I entered the store and asked the clerk there if I could try on an outfit like the one on the left side of the store window display. Thirty minutes later I left with my purchase. This outfit was far trendier than my usual clothing but still covered enough so that I felt like a lady. Like I said, perfect. I went back to the school and attempted to apply myself to my work, but for some reason my addiction studies held no interest for me. Could it have been because I was becoming addicted to one Sheldon Cooper? I decided to pursue that thought further with him tonight at dinner. Even when we disagreed, and we often did that, we always seemed to understand each other and were able to talk about anything together. That was almost as nice as the kissing. I said 'almost'.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl that day, but finally it was time to head home and get ready for my meeting with Sheldon. I took a quick shower, put on some light makeup, curled my hair, and put on my new outfit, along with the new perfume I had bought. I then looked at myself in the mirror when I was finished and I almost didn't recognize myself. Who was this pretty girl looking back at me from the mirror? It was me, of course, but the new me. The 'me' who was going to rock the world of one Sheldon Cooper.

It seemed I was almost floating as I headed back to my office, holding the key tightly in my hand. What a morning! Outside of some bruised knuckles it had been a most enjoyable day so far. I had defended the honor of a wonderful woman, gotten my job back, and had kissed Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. That had been the first time I had kissed any woman, or had wanted to for that matter. And I had enjoyed it much more than I thought I would. As happy as I was to be back in my office, I found it extremely difficult to concentrate on my work. Amy's eyes, Amy's lips, and Amy's smile kept interfering. Eventually I gave up any pretense of work and caught the bus home. I had to do some shopping for an ensemble to impress Amy and I knew just who to ask to help me.

I had walked into the apartment I shared with Leonard and pulled out my phone. I called Leonard's girlfriend, Penny. It had been her day off from working at The Cheesecake Factory and I needed her help. She answered on the second ring.

 _"What's up, Buttercup?"_ she had asked me in her light, teasing, voice. Penny may not have had the intelligence of either me or Leonard, but she had street smarts and an uncanny taste for what looked good on me or anyone else for that matter. She had helped me pick out outfits for several occasions before this one. Her fashion sense was uncanny and I needed that right then.

 _"Penny, I need you for something."_

 _"Not in this lifetime, Sheldon."_

 _"Penny, be serious. I need you to help me pick out something to wear for a social engagement tonight."_

 _"What kind of award are you getting this time, Shelly?"_

 _"No, it's not that kind of social engagement, Penny. I am looking to dress to impress as they say."_

 _Who are you trying to impress, anyway?_

 _"A fellow scientist."_

 _"Why would you need clothes to impress another geek? You guys all dress weird, Leonard included."_

 _This is a female scientist._

 _"So, what does that…wait, Sheldon, do you have a date?"_

 _"I suppose you could call it that, yes."_

 _"I'll be right over. Don't you dare move."_

 _"All right. I won't."_ Where did she think I would go? Sometimes Penny's brain fails to fire on all its cylinders.

Penny barged into the apartment; she always barged into our apartment, and asked me, "C'mon, tell me Sheldon. Who is this girl and where did you meet her?"

I sighed and decided I had to give her the requested details if I wanted her help. "Her name is Amy Farrah Fowler and I met her at work."

Penny kept probing, she was relentless, "Is she cute?"

I gave her as few details as possible without sounding too vague, "She's brilliant, funny, professional, and she is a neurobiologist."

At that answer, Penny rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, "I asked if she was cute, Sheldon."

I knew there was no getting out of this. Penny never gave up on these kinds of things. I sighed and replied, "I suppose so. I am more interested in her brain." That had been a lie, but Penny didn't have to know everything.

Penny's eyes then narrowed and she asked me in a determined voice, "What does she look like, Sheldon?"

I gave up the fight and replied, "She has long brown hair, green eyes, and stand somewhere around five and a half feet tall. She has a lovely voice that I find soothing and her eyes enchant me."

Penny's eyes went wide and her mouth flew open, "OMG! You're in love!"

I nodded and told her, "That is quite possible. Now, will you accompany me to the mall to find something to wear that will, as they say, 'turn her on'?"

Penny had suddenly grabbed me by the hand and pulled me towards the door, "Will I? Let's get going. I know just the thing and just the right store to find it at."

We arrived at the mall and Penny steered me straight to an Old Navy store where we were in and out in about thirty minutes. Penny was a girl who, when it came to shopping for clothes, knew exactly what she wanted and where to get it. This included shopping for others. Leonard was one of the few people I knew who didn't take fashion advice from her. I usually didn't care one way or another about what I wore unless it was for a professional event. This, however, was different. I cared very much about what I would wear. This outfit had to make Amy Farrah Fowler fall in love with me. It had to be perfect. When I got home, showered, shaved, dressed, and looked in the mirror at myself, I realized that perfect was what Penny had chosen. I could hardly wait to see Amy's reaction when she saw me in my new outfit.

I arrived at The Cheesecake Factory at our scheduled time, my heart in my throat. I had been truly scared and with good reason. I know this will sound ludicrous, but at that point in my life I was a thirty-year-old virgin on the brink of her very first love affair. I entered the restaurant and looked around. Sheldon hadn't arrived yet and I had been grateful. I needed a few minutes to compose myself. My new outfit had also made me nervous. I had been so used to dressing myself according to my mother's wishes that these new close made me feel a bit cheap. Now logically, I knew I was anything but, but try telling that to my head when I was dressed in a way that my mother would have disapproved of thoroughly. What would Sheldon think? Would he like it? And if he did, would it be for the right reasons? All of these thoughts were crashing around in my brain when I caught sight of him walking through the door. Good lord the man was hot!

I had gazed at myself in the mirror before I left the apartment. I looked different and I wasn't sure I liked that. I don't like change much at all, really. I never have and I still don't. So that night, I wasn't entirely comfortable with the man who stared back at me from the mirror. I didn't look like Sheldon Lee Cooper at all. I looked more like one of the many men who used to pass through Penny's life without leaving a mark. I didn't want to be like one of those men, but I still wanted to impress Amy. I looked again and decided even if I didn't care for the way I was dressed; Amy would most likely love it and that was what mattered most to me that night. Amy. Penny had very kindly offered to drive me to my date and I didn't turn her down. These were most definitely not bus pants I was wearing. After making her take an oath not to stick around or spy on me, I accepted her kind offer. I think Penny got a bigger thrill out of the entire event than even I did. She had dropped me off at the restaurant and I cautiously entered the establishment. I caught sight of Amy right away and quite literally, she took my breath away.

Sheldon Cooper had, indeed, been a sight to behold. Gone were the double t-shirts and boring khaki pants. In their place he had been wearing a fabulous pair of black skinny jeans with a blue jewel toned t-shirt, which brought out the deep blue of his eyes magnificently. Over this shirt he wore a stylish black bomber jacket. I swear, the man had looked good enough to eat. I greeted him with a quick hug and kiss and we were then led to our table. I couldn't stop looking at him; the change had been both dramatic and subtle at the same time. He certainly hadn't been wearing a suit or anything fancy; he was still dressed on the casual side. But, the black pants only accentuated his long, lean, legs and the t-shirt paired with the bomber jacket gave him an almost rakish air. I was useless. I could stop staring at this handsome hunk of a man sitting across the booth from me. How could one person change their look so slightly and have it make such a big difference? Before that night, I had thought of Sheldon as an average looking man with very above average eyes and intellect. As of the moment he walked through that restaurant door I had wanted nothing more than to jump his bones.

I had taken in Amy's ensemble with complete approval. She had pulled off a look that was all her own and yet completely different. Gone were the bulky cardigans and flowered shirts. In their place she had been wearing a deep jade-colored t-shirt, which brought out the lovely green of her eyes. This top was covered by an attractive, waist length, denim jacket. The knee length skirts and tights had been swapped out for a lovely pair of denim jeggings and black ankle boots. While her hair had always been worn long and straight, Amy now had it piled in gentle curls on the top of her head. Her new look was trendy, young, and playful, yet still classy and demure. I had taken one look at her and knew I had never seen a more beautiful creature in my life than Amy Farrah Fowler. We had exchanged the ordinary hug and kiss of a couple greeting each other. But this was no ordinary hug and kiss. It had been extremely special to me. I had never kissed a woman in a romantic manner before Amy and now all I could think of that evening was kissing her once more, again and again.

Once we had been seated, I decided to bring up a subject that was both neutral, yet conducive to conversation. So, I decided to return to the events of that morning. "Sheldon, I want to thank you again for you aid this morning."

He patiently explained to me, "Amy, the man was being overbearing the threatening to you. I only did what any gentleman would do under the circumstances."

I had decided to praise him for his actions, anyway, and I told him, "Well I considered it quite heroic. How is your hand, by the way?"

He had held it up and I saw that is was slightly bruised, but in one piece. He told me it was, "Sore, but nothing broken. I hope the same can be said for Bert's jaw."

My distaste for Bert's actions that morning had still been with me and I told Sheldon, "Yes. Well, he more than had it coming."

He looked like he had wanted to change the subject and he affirmed that by saying, "I suppose so. But enough about Bert. Let's talk about something different. Amy, do you have any hobbies besides reading?"

Oh, I have always enjoyed talking about my hobbies and I answered him with, "Of course. I love to knit and play the harp. Do you play any musical instruments?"

He had looked up from his menu and grinned at me, "Yes. I have played the keyboard, bongos, and the Theremin. Not all at once, of course."

I gave a little chuckle at that comment and replied, "I see. Can you sing?"

Sheldon merely shrugged and then replied, "I can hold a tune, but not much more than that. What made you take up the harp?"

I had not wanted to go into that in any great detail, so I have him the abridged version. "I don't know. My mother insisted I take music lessons when I was younger so I chose the harp. It was that or the violin and that instrument held little interest for me."

He then gave me the opening I had been waiting for by telling me, "I've never seen anyone play the harp except for pictures of angels in my mother's Bible."

I had smiled coyly, "Oh, are you comparing me to an angel?"

Sheldon had been very quick to refute that thought, "I wouldn't think so, unless you suddenly sprout wings and sail off to Heaven. I was just saying that the only beings I have seen play the harp were in a picture in a very old book."

I then made the decision to muster up all of my courage and I responded with, "Well, I could have you come over and watch me play sometime."

His grin had been a most welcome sight and he answered my invitation with, "That might prove interesting, Amy Farrah Fowler. I would enjoy that."

I had picked up my menu to hide my grinning face and added, "I could make us some dinner to go along with the music. What would you like me to make?"

The man almost jumped out his seat with excitement as he told me, "My favorite dinner of all is spaghetti with little hot dogs cut up in it."

That had sounded easy to do and I informed him of that with, "That sounds simple enough. Are you busy this Thursday?"

His had a disbelieving look on his face and he asked me, "Are you asking me over to your apartment?"

Silly man, I had reassured him with a simple, "Of course. How else are you going to see me play the harp? They aren't very portable you know." I had to give an internal chuckle at my own witticism.

A look of immense relief had filled his face as he gave an odd little laugh as he answered me, "Noted. Would you be agreeable to me bringing a game for us to play after dinner?"

Oh, that sounded like it could be fun and I responded with an excited and curious, "Absolutely. Parlor games are an American tradition. What sort of game is it?"

Now it had been his turn to grin in a teasing manner, "You will see when I get there."

I decided to muster up all of my courage once again made the following suggestion, "Sheldon, I do not want you to take the bus all the way to Glendale. Therefore, I making you an offer for me to pick you up and drive you to my place. Is that copacetic with you?"

At that point our waitress came over and we gave her our orders. After that, we immediately returned to our conversation. "Amy, that is a good idea. I thank you for your kind offer."

I had decided to continue with my request as I was now on a roll, "One thing I have to insist on, Sheldon."

He looked at me quizzically and asked, "What is that?"

I winked at him, "Wear that outfit, okay?"

He had winked back, "Only if you wear that."

We both gave a chuckle and I affirmed our wardrobes, "Agreed. We will be dressed as we are tonight."

Our food soon arrived and we continued our pleasant conversation as we ate. I learned quite a bit about Sheldon and he learned much about me as well. We had both lost our fathers when young and had been mostly raised by our mothers, who were both religious to a fault. This made an even further bond between us and our dinner ended far too soon for my tastes.

But end it did and soon we were leaving The Cheesecake Factory and headed for my car. I decided the only polite thing to do was to give him a ride home so he wouldn't have to bother his friend, Penny. She had done enough by giving him a lift to the restaurant. I thought getting him back home was my responsibility. "Sheldon, would you be offended if I offered you a ride home?"

He looked over at me questioningly, "Why would I take offense? I appreciate your kind offer."

Once in my car, we had looked at each other and Sheldon leaned over and kissed me sweetly on the lips. "That will have to do for now," he had told me. "I don't want to distract you from your driving."

I then started my car, backed it up, and made my way out of the parking lot and headed for Sheldon's building. All too soon we were there. I hated to see this evening end, but we both had work in the morning. I turned to Sheldon and said, "Thank you for a most interesting evening, Sheldon. I truly enjoyed myself."

He had said nothing in response but leaned over and gently pulled me to him. Soon, I was lost in the deliciousness of his kiss. Soft and gentle, yet urging and probing, it was everything a kiss should be, or at least I felt that way. I hadn't had a lot of experience with kissing, but I was very eager to learn as long as my teacher was Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

All too soon he broke the kiss and told me in a hoarse voice, "I suppose I should go up to my apartment now. It's getting late and we both have to go in to work in the morning."

My disappointment must have shown because he followed that up with, "Would you care to join me for lunch tomorrow? I'd like you to meet my friends."

I managed to get out the words, "I'd love to." Before he pulled me to him once again and we kissed for a while longer. Finally, we reluctantly separated and Sheldon opened the door of the car to get out. Before he did, he turned to me and said, "You are a most fascinating woman, Amy Farrah Fowler."

I just stared at him for a moment before replying, "And you are a most intriguing man, Sheldon Lee Cooper."

He broke out into a big grin, waved, and told me, "I will pick you up at your lab for lunch and noon. Is that all right with you?"

I then nodded, waved, and drove off. I didn't sleep much after I got home that night. My mind was far too busy with thoughts of a man with a pair of deep blue eyes and soft, sensuous lips.

After we were seated in our booth we began the social ritual called 'chit chat'. Amy had started this by thanking me for protecting her from Bert that morning. I replied that, I only did what any gentleman would do under the circumstances."

Amy touched both my heart and my pride by calling my action 'heroic' and inquiring as to the status of my punching hand. I assured her that there was nothing broken and that I hoped Bert's jaw was in the same intact condition as my right hand.

To my surprise, soft, gentle, Amy had responded to that with, "Yes. Well, he more than had it coming."

I then decided that we had rehashed the events of the morning quite enough and that a change of subject was in order. I continued the conversation by inquiring as to whether Amy had any other hobbies besides reading. I didn't think I could handle another work by Chaucer to be honest.

She had smiled and informed me that she loved to knit and that she played the harp. Ahh, that gave us a new trajectory for our conversation that could possibly get me to my goal of another date with her. She added, "Do you play any musical instruments?"

I then told her I had played the keyboard, bongos, and the Theremin in my lifetime, though not all at the same time. She seemed to find this amusing and asked me if I could sing.

I grinned and answered her with, "I can hold a tune, but not much more than that. What made you take up the harp?"

She explained to me that her mother had forced music lessons upon her as a child, so she had chosen the harp. I rather liked her stance on that. No cookie cutter flute or violin for that young lady. She was her own person and chose her own path. I truly admired that and I then found that my feelings for her had begun to increase.

I decided to play my cards to my advantage and told her I had never seen anyone play the harp before except for the pictures of angels in my mother's Bible.

I didn't quite understand her comeback to that when she asked me if I were comparing her to an angel and I refuted it. I truly wasn't, but the more I thought about it, the more I liked that idea.

To my great delight she then gave a flirtatious grin and informed me that I would have to come over to her apartment sometime and watch her play the harp and that she would make us some dinner on that occasion. I had to admit, that sounded like a very interesting evening and I told her as much.

She had excitedly leaned forward and asked me, "What would you like me to make?"

Well that one had been extremely easy to answer. I told her, "My favorite dinner of all is spaghetti with little hot dogs cut up in it." My mother had made this to perfection for me as a child, but I decided against dragging my mother any further into our discussion.

Amy agreed to that menu and invited me over to her home on the next Thursday, which met with complete approval by me. She even made a little joke about harps not being portable so I would have to come to her place to see her play. I gave a little laugh and asked if I could bring a game over that both of us could play.

She had replied in the affirmative. "Absolutely. Parlor games are an American tradition. What sort of game is it?"

I teased her with that by telling her she would find out when I got there, which seemed to pique her curiosity. She then offered to pick me up and drive me to her apartment in Glendale, which I found rather touching. Before I could answer her, however, our waitress came over and took our orders. We then resumed our talk. I agreed with Amy that her picking me up was a good idea and then I thanked her for the offer.

At that point we both decided to have some fun with this plan and we both promised the other that we would be dressed as we were that night on the coming Thursday.

After that had been agreed upon, our food arrived and we continued to talk. We discussed our paths and came to the realization that we had far more in common that being scientists working at Cal Tech. It seemed we had both grown up with our mothers as our main parent after our fathers had died. Both of our mothers were extremely religious as well. This new information led me to feel even closer to this lovely woman and when our dinner had ended, I found myself extremely reluctant to leave her. I had a strong suspicion that she felt the same way as well.

As we were leaving The Cheesecake Factory and heading for her car, Amy kindly offered me a ride home. I'm no fool; I had quickly accepted her offer before she could change her mind. When we were finally seated in her car I looked over at her beautiful face and kissed her lightly on the lips. No use going in for more right before the woman was going to be driving. I have always believed in safety first and this situation did not change that viewpoint.

All too quickly we arrived at my building and I knew I would have to tell Amy goodnight. I hated that thought, but the evening had come an end and that was that. Amy then turned to me and gave me the sweetest smile and she said, "Thank you for a most interesting evening, Sheldon. I truly enjoyed myself"

I couldn't leave her and I completely failed at a nonchalant good bye. I reached out and softly embraced her, she felt so good against my chest, even better than she had that morning. My mind was waging an internal war on whether to kiss her or not and I finally decided that I would. No, I had to. At that moment Amy Farrah Fowler was the most important thing in the world to me and I had to show her that. Kissing seemed the perfect vehicle for conveying my feelings to her.

I will never forget that kiss! My tongue gently opened her lips and began a tentative exploration of her mouth. Soon, it was no longer tentative and I could get enough of the taste and feel of her. She returned my kiss with equal ardor and soon we were both lost to the outside world, our new feelings for each other totally taking over our minds. Well, what was left of them, anyway. I seemed to have lost the power of logical thought the second our kiss began. I can only recall my mind screaming, 'more, more, more' to me. And I heartily complied.

Eventually I ceased kissing her, the reason being that I only too well realized that we both had to get up and go to work in the morning and it was getting late. It was almost ten o'clock and we both needed to get some rest. I informed Amy of this and a most disappointed and sad look came over her face, which touched me to no small degree. I decided I wanted to put a smile back on that face, so I invited her to go to lunch with me the following day. I wanted to show Amy off to all of my friends and I had decided that was the best way to accomplish that.

Yes, the smile did return to her face as she took me up on my offer. I couldn't resist, the words were barely out of her mouth when I reached out to hug her goodbye and found myself, once again, enthralled by Amy's kiss. I never wanted to stop kissing her. This was a new and very exciting experience for me and I wanted to savor it forever. But reality eventually prevailed and we separated and said our reluctant goodnights to each other. Before I left her car, I turned to her and out of nowhere told her, "You are a most fascinating woman, Amy Farrah Fowler."

Am replied in kind to me and I informed her that I would be picking her up at her lab at twelve o'clock, to which she seemed agreeable. I went up to the apartment, headed straight for my room, and tossed and turned the rest of the night. I couldn't get the thought of Amy Farrah Fowler and her dancing green eyes and soft, addictive, lips out of my mind. I couldn't wait for the next day to introduce the most wonderful woman in the world to my friends.

 **Well, well, well. Now our two lovebirds have kissed. Do you think Sheldon's friends will accept Amy? Do you think they are now truly in love? Looks that way, doesn't it?**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Amy Meets the Guys

 **Amy meets Sheldon's buddies. This may just be a wild ride, so hang on.**

The next morning I had arose with an extremely strong sense of purpose and a spring in my step. I was going back to work! Also, this was the day I was going to introduce Amy Farrah Fowler to my friends. I could hardly wait to do this. I had never had a girlfriend before, so this would be something both novel and unprecedented in my relationships with them. I dressed in my usual ensemble; I just wanted to save the good stuff for when Amy and I were on dates together. I headed out to the living room and met Leonard, who was drinking his usual mug of coffee at the breakfast bar.

I called out a cheery, "Good morning, Leonard! Can you give me a lift to work? I have been reinstated as of yesterday."

Leonard had looked at me with some curiosity and replied, "Yeah, I heard all about that. Did you really punch Bert in the face? The entire school is talking about it."

I chose a tea from the box and put water in the kettle. I then turned to him and replied, "It wasn't as cut and dried as all that, Leonard. The punch happened in the process of protecting a female of the species from harm at the hands of another male."

Leonard had then dropped his coffee cup on the counter with a bang. "Let me get this straight. YOU defended someone? YOU?"

I turned to address him while I waited for the kettle to come to a boil, "Yes, Leonard. Me. It seems that somewhere deep inside my psyche lives the Honor Code of Texas. I saw a woman in trouble and I rescued her from that situation."

Leonard shook his head and threw a obvious smirk in my direction. "Well, all I can say is 'Remember the Alamo'. Come on; let's get going before we're late to work. Oh, welcome back. I've almost missed having you in the car." That was a more snarky answer from him than usual. I wonder if he knows how annoying he can be to his friends sometimes.

I had responded to his not-so-subtle jibe with the truth, "Almost? Admit it, Leonard. The lack of my presence created a giant black hole in your life."

Leonard had taken his cup to the sink and rinsed it. He then headed for the door and grabbed his keys from the bowl, "Don't push it, Sheldon. You still need a ride."

I gave him one of my classic sighs as I poured the hot water into my travel cup, added the tea bag, and put the lid on it. I didn't want to argue with him that morning. I was in much too good of a mood for that. "Very well. Let me get my bag and we'll go. Oh, I am bringing someone to lunch today." At that last announcement I had found it hard to keep a smile off of my face.

Leonard locked the door and turned to me as we headed down the stairs, "Oh? Is your mother in town?"

I adjusted my bag on my shoulder and answered him, "No. And do be serious for a moment. I would never bring my mother into my working environment. No, my guest is going to be Dr. Fowler."

We got to the lobby and Leonard stopped and replied in a very calm, welcoming manner, "Oh, the one you saved from Bert. Okay. Well, we'll all see you there then. I hope for both of your sakes that Howard will be on his best behavior." Sometimes it was moments such as that which showed me why he was my best friend.

As we headed for his car I attempted to reassure him, "Never fear, Leonard. I will have filled her in on the peccadilloes of all of you. So, nothing should shock her."

He stopped and gave me a look of great annoyance and then let it go. "You WHAT? Never mind. Let's get going."

We had the usual calm, enjoyable, ride to work where I attempted to sharpen Leonard's mind with scientific trivia. He did not seem very responsive to this, so I busied myself with my phone. Soon, we arrived on campus and I practically drug Leonard to the Bridge Physics Building. I couldn't wait to begin work once more, and introduce a certain young woman to my friends at lunch. This was certainly going to be a red letter day for me.

Morning finally came and I prepared myself for work. It hadn't really matter what I decided to wear because my lab coat pretty much covered everything. Still, I had put on a little makeup, curled my hair, and left the cardigan and skirt at home and wore a nice pair of dress slacks and a pastel green short sleeved blouse instead. I wanted to impress Sheldon's friends without coming off like I was trying too hard to do that.

When I reached my lab, I put on my lab coat, tied back my hair, and made the effort to put in some work before lunch. At that point in time I had been studying the effects of Paxil withdrawal on primates. It was interesting work and usually I was extremely attentive to the affects the withdrawal had on my subjects. On that day, however, I merely noted their agitation or somnambulant behavior on their charts while my thoughts kept returning to Sheldon Cooper and the kisses we had shared the night before.

After I had fed the monkeys and made my required notes, I finally abandoned any pretext of working and lost myself in thought about the lunch hour to come. I had hoped his friends would be accepting of me. If they didn't it was going to be one long and uncomfortable lunch hour. I calmed myself by reasoning that Sheldon liked me and his friends most likely were very much like him, so they most likely would find me acceptable. At least I hoped that would happen, anyway.

Slowly, the hands made their journey around the clock face and, finally, it was time to prepare to go to lunch. I didn't exactly feel guilty; I had completed all the necessary tasks on my agenda that morning. It was more like I felt bad that my attention had not been completely centered on those tasks. Perhaps most people in relationships felt this way, or maybe not. But I was new to this feeling and it bothered me a little. In spite of that feeling I removed my lab coat, freshened my makeup, and prepared to go to lunch with Sheldon. I had just finished putting on a touch of cologne when I heard the Sheldon's triplicate knock on my lab door. I inhaled deeply, then exhaled thoroughly, and called out, "Come in, Sheldon." What happened next made all the inattention to my work worthwhile.

After I had thanked Leonard for the ride to work, I made my way to my office and sat down contentedly behind my desk. It felt so good to be back at work, and I owed most of that to Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. She had not only made me take a hard look at myself and my foibles, she had studied her own as well, which most people who had ever criticized me had failed to do. Together we had discovered what made each of us 'tick' and she had helped us both immensely in dealing with our mutual brain blocks. Her allowing me to talk about the brain scans and what they showed was an entirely new experience for me. Everyone generally called me 'weird' or 'crazy', but Amy had delved deeper into the mannerisms that aggravated others and had come up with a plan to help me improve my personality. It is important for me to note here that Amy NEVER tried to change me; she had merely showed me how to keep my familiar core values while working on my mental blocks and overcoming them. As our meetings went on, it wasn't that I saw the world in a whole new way or anything, but I saw myself in a new light. When I realized that I could love and trust both myself and others, I just viewed myself as a far more positive person.

I turned on my computer and started to work on my research, going back and forth between my computer and my white board, marker in hand. But, try as I might, I failed to completely get a set of lovely green eyes and a pair of soft lips out of my mind. The mere thought of seeing Amy again for lunch is what got me through that morning, which had seemed interminable. Finally, it was close to noon and made my way from the physics building to the one that housed the biology department. I made my way down the maze of corridors towards Amy's lab. I knocked on her door and I heard her reply, "Come in Sheldon." I entered her lab and was overwhelmed at the very sight of her. What I did next was totally out of my comfort zone, but it needed to be done.

As Sheldon entered my lab, his deep blue eyes focused intensely on my person. He quickly crossed the room and wordlessly gathered me up in his arms and held me tight. I returned his hug and fully expected him to release me so we could go to lunch, but he kept holding me tightly against him, as if I were something he never wanted to let go. Eventually I murmured against his chest, "Maybe we should get going down to the cafeteria."

He spoke, but it was not in answer to my question. He had something very important to say to me regarding our budding relationship. "Amy, what has happened between the two of us is a novel situation for me. I have never desired a girlfriend before and I don't want to handle this badly. Do know that I have certain feelings for you that must be explored, but I do believe we should take our time exploring them. I hope you understand."

I laid my head closer against his chest and felt his heart beating. It was such a comforting sound. I replied, "I do understand, Sheldon. I don't want our relationship to crash and burn. I have every intention of taking this at a pace that is comfortable for both of us. I have also not forgotten that you are still under my professional care. We will tread this water carefully. I have no problem with that."

He suddenly released me and replied, "Good. Now, I want my friends to meet you. But Dr. Fowler, I fully intend to see you again tonight. Please come over to my apartment for dinner. We are having Thai takeout tonight and I can assure you that we will have fun. You can also meet one of my very best friends, Penny. She is Leonard's girlfriend and has always been someone I can confide in. I love her like a sister and I'd love you two to become friends."

I took a step back and told him, "Whoa there, son. Remember what we both said about taking our time? First, let me meet your colleagues at lunch and then we'll discuss me meeting your other friends. This is all happening so quickly I'd like a little time to catch my breath." Truth be told, I was more than a little frightened about how fast this was all going and how deep my feelings for this man were.

To my surprise, Sheldon gave me a gentle smile and reassured me with, "Of course, how thoughtless of me. You're right. Let's get lunch finished with before we talk about dinner. It's just that I can't wait for you to meet everyone I know."

I walked back into his arms and promised him, "I will, Sheldon, I will. But for right now, I'd love to have more time alone with you so we can get to know each other better." I looked up for a second and made this suggestion, "I'll tell you what; let me give you a ride to my place after work and I'll order us some takeout. That way we can sit and talk and learn more about each other. How does that sound?"

He answered me in a somewhat hesitant voice, "I suppose we could do that, but I hate missing out on Thai food. I know, let's have dinner at my place with my friends and then we can go to your place to talk after our session on Thursday. I do believe that is called compromising. It is a fine art that is important in relationships. Or that's what I've been told, anyway."

My head returned to his chest and I murmured against it, "Fine. Dinner at your place it is. But just so you know, I have a six pack of YooHoo cooling in my refrigerator as we speak."

He lightly kissed the top of my head and replied in a teasing way, "You vixen, Amy Farrah Fowler. Using a tantalizing bottled beverage as bait to lure me to your apartment. For what it's worth, you were successful. I accept your offer. We will have dinner at your apartment on Thursday evening."

Regretfully, I pulled myself away from him and straightened my clothing. I gave him my best smile and said, "Now that we've gotten that settled, let's head off to lunch."

On our way to the cafeteria, Sheldon gave me the lowdown on all of his friends who would be dining with us. Leonard Hofstadter was Sheldon's best friend and, from what Sheldon told me, was a very kind, accommodating man. He was the one who made the most effort to understand Sheldon, even if they had disagreements from time to time. Leonard worked at Cal Tech as an experimental physicist. I suppose their areas of study had helped them bond to some degree.

The next friend Sheldon told me about was Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali. Dr. Koothrappali was a particle astrophysicist. This man often worked with Sheldon and I could tell he held Dr. Koothrappali's work in high esteem. Sheldon also informed me that Rajesh suffered from selective mutism and could not converse with women while sober. I had supposed that we were not going to get much in the area of lunchtime banter from this man while I was present.

The last person Sheldon talked about was Howard Wolowitz. I was informed that Howard was the only person in their group who had not earned a Doctorate. Howard worked for the school as an aeronautic engineer. Howard was on loan to Cal Tech from NASA. That fact gave him a lot of street cred from me, but failed to impress Sheldon. Howard was dating a lovely woman (Sheldon's words, not mine) named Bernadette who was a microbiologist. That little fact increased my desire to have dinner at Sheldon's place immensely. I am well versed in all the sciences, but biology and all its different disciplines was my passion, so I could hardly wait to meet Bernadette.

We finally reached the lunchroom and Sheldon pointed out the table that his friends had commandeered for lunch. My nerves were getting the better of me until Sheldon reached for my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Have no fear, Amy. They are all my friends and we will most likely end up discussing our work the entire time."

Boy, was he wrong.

As I hurried over to pick up Amy, many thoughts were swirling through my brain. Was I ready to fall in love? Yes. Was I ready to introduce her to my friends? Yes. Was I ready to take the physical part of our relationship further? NO. I wanted to have Amy in my life forever and rushing into a physical relationship too quickly could have very well jeopardized that. Neither of us had ever been physically intimate with another person and that made the idea of engaging in coitus incredibly scary for me. I truly did feel like I was falling in love with this lady, but I wanted to enjoy the journey. When I travel, I love to take the train. Taking the train allows one to enjoy the beautiful scenery as you head towards your destination. When it came to being physical with her, I wanted to take the train instead of fly.

When I reached her office I did my usual knocking on her door and heard her tell me I could come in. As I entered her lab, I walked straight to her and took her in my arms. I wanted to hold her as I expressed to her my desire to take this relationship at a slower pace than she may have been planning on.

To my great relief, Amy agreed with me. I then invited her to have dinner with me and all of my friends that night at the apartment I shared with Leonard. I attempted to persuade her to accept my invitation by mentioning that we would be having Thai food. Who in their right mind can resist Thai food? Not me, that's for sure. I dangled the prospect of her meeting Penny in front of her as well. To my great disappointment, Amy reminded me that I had been the one to suggest taking our relationship at a leisurely pace. She wanted to meet my colleagues from the school first before she made a decision regarding having dinner tonight. I could clearly see where she was coming from and I hastened to reassure her that I was not going to push her into doing anything she didn't want. I reiterated that I was merely excited at the idea of her meeting my friends. But I did concede to her wishes with a heartfelt, "You're right. Let's get lunch finished with before we talk about dinner."

Amy then made the suggestion that we spend more time alone together in an effort to get better acquainted with each other. That made sense. Heaven only knew what strange mannerisms this woman might have. Don't get me wrong, I would love her anyway, but I still wanted to find out what the pattern of her everyday life was. I surmised that there were things about her that I did not know. I, myself, like quite a bit of structure to my life. And a beautiful brunette was most likely not going to change that. However, this discovering of each other sounded like an exciting journey. It actually seemed rather like a heroic quest and that pleased me very much.

Amy then invited me over to her home for dinner. I didn't much care for that idea. Not because the idea of dinner at her apartment was abhorrent to me, not at all. But I had really been looking forward to us enjoying some Thai food with my friends. I made her a counter offer of meeting my friends tonight and having dinner at her place on Thursday, in place of our usual meeting at a restaurant. At that point, Amy snuggled in my arms and willingly agreed to that compromise, but then made an effort to tempt me by saying she had bottle of YooHoo chilling in her refrigerator. This woman was nothing but a vixen attempting to lure me like Lorelei to her rocky perch, which was actually much safer than that. At that point I was putty in her hands and agreed to dinner with her at her home on Thursday night. I mean, how could a man have resisted YooHoo? Not this man, that's for sure.

We then headed, hand in hand, for the cafeteria and lunch with Leonard, Raj, and Howard. On our way there I filled her in on each one of them; their educations, areas of study, and any other facts about them that I found pertinent to the situation. Forewarned is forearmed I have always said and this lunch gathering was going to be a good example of that. Or not.

Sheldon and I entered the lunch room and he immediately guided me over to the table where his friends were sitting. He first introduced me to his roommate, Leonard. I was immediately taken in by his warm smile and genuine manner. I could see this man was both honest and open and I liked that quite a bit. I could fully understand why Sheldon was friends with him.

Next, I met Rajesh. He seemed a bit quiet and that worried me until I remembered Sheldon telling me about his selective mutism. I gave him a sincere 'Happy to meet you.' and shook his hand. He then whispered something into the ear of the man I was later informed was Howard. This struck me as a bit strange but I let it pass as I didn't want to come off as rude.

Last, but not least, Sheldon introduced me to Howard. I really didn't like him at first sight. I rather wished I had been wearing my old outfit that covered my chest in several layers, because that was where this man's eyes strayed. For quite a long time, in fact. I finally had enough and told him, "Mr. Wollowitz, why don't you just take a picture of them. It will last longer."

Rather than being embarrassed or put off by my words, Howard merely smiled and pulled out his phone and pretended to take a picture of my chest. Both Sheldon and Leonard called him out for that action with, "Howard, knock it off already." and "I didn't bring her here to be ogled by you, Wollowitz. Stop it."

I then turned to Sheldon and his friend and attempted to placate them with, "No problem. Sheldon has informed me of Howard's lack of a Doctorate. So I am, as you say, considering the source."

That little comment earned me the evil eye from Howard and a disapproving look from Leonard, though I failed to see why. My mocking him for his educational lack was not in any way equal to having your breasts leered at for five minutes.

Sheldon then took me with him to get our lunch. We each picked up a tray and Sheldon congratulated me on my snappy retort to Howard. I believe his exact words were, "That's my girl." Or something to that effect. Once we had gotten our food we returned to the table where I found Raj once again whispering in the ear of Howard. I still found that more than a little odd, but I had again said nothing.

I was minding my own business, eating my food and thinking about the work waiting for me back in my lab when Howard began to tease Sheldon. "Hey, Sheldon, are you finally getting some?"

"Getting some what?" Sheldon had asked him, and with good reason. I had wondered about that, too.

Howard then threw a lecherous look my way and said, "You'll have to forgive him, Amy. He's a bit sexually retarded, if you know what I mean." At that point, Raj leaned over and began to whisper in his ear once more.

I was a bit angry at that last remark. Sheldon and I were both virgins, but retarded? Most definitely not. So, I replied, "Oh, the man without a Doctorate is calling the man with one retarded? I fail to see the logic in that." Sheldon just sat back and grinned. I think he was enjoying that more than a little bit.

Howard gave a sly wink and remarked, "I wasn't talking about intelligence, I was talking about the fact that you are Sheldon's first real girlfriend, if that's what you are. He's never been the passionate type if you know what I mean." He then grinned at me before Raj once again had his head up against Howard's ear.

I could keep quiet no longer and asked him, "Howard, how long have you been in a same sex relationship with Raj? Is he your first boyfriend or have there been others?" For some strange reason Leonard found this highly amusing and spit mashed potatoes out on his plate. I truly did not know what Sheldon saw in these people. They all seemed a bit strange to me.

Howard began to sputter, "I'm not, we're not, he's not, I'm not…"

I made an erstwhile attempt to pacify him with, "It doesn't matter. Homosexuality is becoming widely accepted these days. As it should be, actually. Our sexual preferences are hard wired into our brains before birth and they have nothing to do with our personal worthiness. In other words, you don't have to hide your relationship from me. It is totally immaterial to me who you are sleeping with. Although your fervent denial rather explains your overcompensating for things by pretending to study my breasts just a bit too closely." By this time, the entire cafeteria went dead quiet and was listening in on our table's conversations.

Sheldon suddenly stood up, smiled widely at me, and told his friends, "I am so sorry we have to be leaving, but Amy and I both have work to do. I'm sure you were all as charmed by her as I have been. I must give you warning though; Amy is mine so do not be getting any ideas in that direction. Have I made myself perfectly clear? She is not for any of you. Period."

I bid everyone at the table a good day and Sheldon and I headed for the door. "I think that went fairly well." I told him.

He put his arm around my waist and gave it a squeeze of approbation, "It couldn't have gone any better. I am quite sure you have impressed them all with your knowledge and your wit. Good job!"

Back at the table, unbeknownst to me, Howard had turned to Leonard and said, "There goes Mr. and Mrs. Bat Shit Crazy." Raj had simply nodded while Leonard turned a pasty shade of grey. Howard had asked him, "What's wrong?"

Leonard put his head in his hands are confessed, "Sheldon invited her over to have dinner with us tonight and I said okay."

"You poor bastard. I think Raj and I will just hang out at his place tonight."

Leonard had looked up in alarm, "Not a chance, buddy. I expect to see you and Raj there at seven o'clock sharp."

Howard challenged him, "Or what?"

"Or I'll spread the rumor around campus that Amy was right."

A look of horror crossed Howard's face and he told Leonard, "You win. We'll be there at seven."

I walked with Amy to the cafeteria and led her to the table where my friends were sitting. Leave it to Leonard to do the right thing; he had saved seats for both Amy and me. I then started to introduce Amy to my compatriots, starting with Leonard. Amy seemed to warm to his kindness and warmth, as I had thought she would. Everyone likes Leonard and it seemed that Amy was no exception.

After she had met Leonard, I introduced Amy to Raj. Not many words were exchanged between them because of his being most reticent when it came to talking with women. Amy was polite in spite of that, but I did see her eyebrows rise when Raj began to whisper in Howard's ear. I couldn't blame her. I had often done the exact same thing when Raj did that. It looked more than a tad strange when you weren't used to it.

Things were going very well, indeed. And then Amy met Howard. I could tell that she took great offense when Howard fixed his eyes upon her chest for a long while. I could tell Amy was becoming more and more uncomfortable the longer he stared. I didn't get the chance to explain to her that he did that to most women before she gave him a caustic comment about why didn't he just take a picture of her breasts. Howard was not deterred by that, he never had been and he most likely never would be. Howard then turned her comment into a joke and pretended to take a picture of Amy's chest with his phone. At that point, both Leonard and I had seen enough of that I informed Howard that I hadn't brought Amy to the lunch room for him to ogle.

Amy tickled me when she waved off Howard by saying, "No problem. Sheldon has informed me of Howard's lack of a Doctorate. So I am, as you say, considering the source." With that, Amy had proven she was my kind of girl! Howard, however, had not appreciated her comment at all and both he and Leonard had glared at her. I, myself, had found the entire scenario amusing.

I decided it was time for Amy and me to actually get some food, so I steered her towards the lunch line where we both picked out a chicken salad and some juice. While in the line, I had complimented her on the way she had handled Howard. She had truly put him in his place and I had enjoyed that. When we returned to the table, Raj had his mouth next to Howard's ear once more. I suppose that must have seemed strange to her, but, again, Amy kept silent.

What happened next caused me no small amount of delight. Amy and I were both behaving ourselves and quietly eating when Howard made the strangest comment. He asked me, "Hey, Sheldon, are you finally getting some?" Now at that I was completely puzzled. I didn't understand his remark. He should have been clearer. What was I supposed to be getting more of? Amy looked puzzled by his remark, as well. So, to clear up any confusion I responded, "Getting some what?"

Instead of explaining his cryptic remark, Howard looked at Amy with no good intent and answered, "You'll have to forgive him, Amy. He's a bit sexually retarded, if you know what I mean." At that point, Raj's mouth became plastered once more to Howard's ear.

Amy fulfilled everyone one of my expectations when she had a quick retort to Howard's silly comment. She asked why the man without a Doctorate was calling a man with one retarded. I was loving this! Howard then winked at Amy and explained that she was most likely my first girlfriend, as though there was something wrong with that. He also claimed that I was not a passionate man. Oh, if only he could have read my mind the night before, he would never have been saying that! True to form, Raj put his mouth to Howard's ear yet again.

Out of nowhere, Amy asked him, "Howard, how long have you been in a same sex relationship with Raj? Is he your first boyfriend or have there been others?" I damn near wet myself then and there and Leonard projected mashed potatoes all over his plate. It was most amusing.

Howard began to vehemently deny her claim, but Amy carried on. She attempted to pacify him as only a neurobiologist could by informing him, "It doesn't matter. Homosexuality is becoming widely accepted these days. As it should be, actually. Our sexual preferences are hard wired into our brains before birth and they have nothing to do with our personal worthiness. In other words, you don't have to hide your relationship from me. It is totally immaterial to me who you are sleeping with. Although your fervent denial rather explains your overcompensating for things by pretending to study my breasts just a bit too closely." At that point, I was pounding the table. This had been hilarious and I was loving every second of it.

The cafeteria had gone strangely quiet. I suppose everyone was done with their lunch and had been ready to head back to their offices. I decided that the time had come for Amy and me to make our exit. I had loved how her wit and intelligence had shone through and I told her that. How could they all not have loved her? Before we took our leave, I reminded the guys in so many words that she was my girlfriend and they should leave her alone. I knew there would be much competition for Amy's hand, but I didn't want it to come from my friends. Anyway, I was totally looking forward to introducing Amy to Penny later that night. I just knew that Penny would adore her, also.

 **Something tells me this is going to be a very interesting dinner party.**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Bon Appetit

 **Amy meets the girls and makes friends. The guys have a bit of a communication problem.**

That evening I had arrived at Sheldon's building at promptly seven p.m., by this time I knew full well the emphasis he placed on punctuality. To my pleasant surprise, he was waiting for me on the sidewalk outside the lobby. I could see the smile that spread across his face as I exited my car and walked towards him.

He greeted me with an upbeat, "Good evening, Dr. Fowler. I hope your drive was a pleasant one."

I answered his question in what I hoped was a pleasant voice, "It was. There was little to no traffic, which doesn't happen very often this time of day. You look very nice tonight, Sheldon." I thought I'd add that to make sure he knew I approved of his appearance.

He nodded and gave me a compliment, "As do you." I had taken great pains with my outfit for the evening. I had paired a new pair of black leggings with a teal sweater that went past my hips. My look was trendy but also fairly conservative. At that point I was still rather reluctant to show much skin, even to Sheldon. Still, I knew I was looking pretty darn good.

We had then entered his building together and made our way up the stairs to the fourth floor. On the way, Sheldon explained to me how the elevator had gotten broken. He couldn't, however, explain why it hadn't been fixed yet. He lived in a nice building in a nice part of town. You would think the building would have been better maintained. That thought soon left my mind and was replaced by a bit of nervousness. I was about to meet yet more new people and I have never been very skilled at that. But this was important to Sheldon and he had approved of the way I had handled myself at lunch. So I decided to act much the same way tonight.

Sheldon opened the door and announced, "Look who's here!" Predictably, Howard looked peeved, Leonard looked a bit cautious (I couldn't figure that one out), and Raj had his mouth against Howard's ear yet again. The only thing different was that this time Howard moved away from Raj and told him, "Would you stop that, please?" I saw a small, blonde, woman next to Howard and assumed, correctly as I later discovered, that this woman must have been his girlfriend, the microbiologist. I was very eager to get to know this woman and 'talk shop' later in the evening.

My biggest surprise was the beautiful blonde woman next Leonard. I had guessed that this was his girlfriend, Penny. Before I could be introduced to her, she came over to me and hugged me tightly, this was a bit startling. She then stepped back and beamed at me before announcing, "Welcome. You must be Amy, Sheldon's new squeeze! I am so happy to meet you. Before I could reply to this, she handed me a glass of wine and gave me a wink. "Anyone who gets the better of Howard Wollowitz is always welcome in my home!" This evening was definitely holding much promise.

Prior to going downstairs to meet Amy, I had decided the best course of action would be to fill in Penny as to who Amy was and I why I wanted them to meet. I took the bull by the horns, so to speak, and took Penny aside to speak with her. "Penny, I really want you to meet Amy. I think you two would really hit it off. That is why I invited her here tonight. Leonard and the other guys have already met her at lunch today."

Penny poured herself a glass of wine and asked me, "Is it true she really got on Howard's case for checking out her chest?"

I took a sip of my water, no alcohol for this man, "Affirmative. She was definitely not appreciative of his attentions in that direction."

Penny then had a bit of wine and quizzed me in an amused way, "And she called out Howard and Raj for their weird friendship?"

I nodded and replied, "Yes, I do believe she did just that."

"Cool." She put down her wine glass and spoke to me in a 'just between the two of us' voice, "Did she really ask Howard if he and Raj had a gay relationship?"

I wasn't quite sure what she meant by that remark, but I answered her as truthfully as I could, "I truly don't know how happy they are, but Amy insinuated that their relationship went beyond mere friendship."

Penny put a hand on each of my shoulders and smiled up at me happily, "Sheldon, I will be more than happy to meet her. She sounds like my kind of girl. When is she due here?"

I made my way to the door, "I am going downstairs to meet her now."

"Well don't be late. I have a feeling this will be quite an interesting evening." She turned to Leonard and said, "Don't you think so?"

Yeah, sure," he answered her with a look of apprehension on his face, "real interesting."

For some reason I failed to fathom, Leonard had not seemed as excited as Penny about the evening. But I had just put it down to being a little nervous about introducing a new member to our little group. I should have told him not to worry, but at that point in time I had to leave and go downstairs to meet Amy. Still, he had seen Amy in action at lunch. He had seen how seamlessly she had fit in with everyone. I sometimes think Leonard worries too much.

Amy and I exchanged the usual pleasantries and headed up the stairs. When we entered the apartment, Howard did not look pleased and pushed Raj away from him as he was whispering in his ear yet again. Bernadette looked curiously at Amy, and Penny went right up to her and greeted her warmly with a hug. She said she was pleased to make her acquaintance and handed her a glass of wine. Amy, of course, was her usual gracious self and accepted Penny's offering as she returned her smile. I could see these two were hitting it off fabulously. I had been correct in my assumptions. Everyone loved Amy. At least I thought they did. But why did Leonard look so worried and Howard so angry? Most likely they had been having some sort of disagreement earlier in the evening. Oh well, it was none of my concern. Amy and I proceeded to the couch where I sat down in my usual spot and invited her to sit next to me. This evening was getting off to a great start!

How do you admit to someone you care about that you intensely dislike something they love? I will admit it right now, I hate Thai food. I do not care for any food that is heavily spiced. This includes Indian food, certain Mexican foods, and most definitely Thai. I'm more of a sushi person, myself. I do believe I made a good show of pushing the food around my plate so it looked like I was actually eating it. Sheldon soon caught on, however, and asked me, "Amy, you are barely touching your food. Do you feel all right?"

I had been forced to come up with and answer quickly. I finally decided on the truth. He had a right to know my likes and dislikes. That was part of building a relationship, right? I turned and confessed to him, "Sheldon, I'm not really fond of Thai food. I find it a bit too spicy. I suppose I prefer sushi to Thai."

At the mere mention of sushi, Penny lit up at that like a Christmas tree. She almost squealed as she replied, "Me too! Thai is not really my thing. But I love sushi! Amy, how would you like to go with me and Bernie for sushi sometime?"

I had never before in my life been invited to hang out with another female. This was certainly a novel experience for me. So I smiled and answered her, "Thank you so very much. I think I would enjoy doing that. Do you have a favorite sushi restaurant you go to?"

Bernadette spoke up at that, I swear she had the squeakiest voice I had ever heard in my life, she informed me, "Penny and I always go to O2 Sushi. It has the best sushi in Pasadena. Hey, we could talk shop while we're there."

"Or not." Penny interjected.

Howard then shot his girlfriend the evil eye. I'm not sure if Bernadette noticed it, but I sure did. What had I ever done to earn that response from him? I had merely made a comment about my take on his relationship with Raj, which still puzzled me. He seemed happy with Bernadette. Maybe he was bisexual. Yes, that must have been it. It explained Howard's actions perfectly.

Anyway, after everyone was finished eating and I was finished pushing the food around my plate, everyone began to talk. The men had gone off to mostly talked shop so I was left to converse with the women, which wasn't an unattractive option but I hadn't much experience engaging in 'girl talk'. No matter. Penny took over and did most of the talking, which made the entire situation much easier for me.

"How long have you been a new row biolwhatever?" Penny asked me in a very inquisitive manner.

I answered her truthfully, "I've been working as a neurobiologist for five years now."

Bernadette leaned forward like she was very interested in my career and asked me, "Where did you go to school?"

"Harvard." I answered her. I hadn't wanted to come off as a braggart, but that was where I went to school.

"That sounds grueling." Penny remarked. "Did you always like that math and science stuff?"

I nodded, pretended to eat more Thai, and replied, "I have always had an interest in the STEM subjects, but I also have an interest in classical literature and music."

Penny made a face and it wasn't from the taste of the food. Her pretty nose wrinkled up as she exclaimed, "Oh boy! I hate all those things. Except music. Who do you like in music? I like Adele, Guns 'n Roses, and Beyonce. Who do you like?"

I turned to her and admitted, "I enjoy classical harp music and Neil Diamond. What about you, Bernadette?" I wanted to include Howard's wife in this discussion. I rather liked her and hoped we could become friends.

She then gave an evil grin that I never have been able to completely erase from my mind and answered enthusiastically, "Thrash metal."

Penny put down her wine glass and made a suggestion, "Okay then, what do you guys say we change the subject?"

Bernadette smiled and replied, "Sure. So, Amy, how did you meet Sheldon?"

Penny chuckled, "Yeah, how did you fall for the Wackadoodle?"

That word had confused me. I had never heard it used before. "Wackadoodle? What's that?"

Penny smiled and explained, "I just meant that Sheldon thinks differently than the rest of us."

I felt I had to correct that statement, so I informed her, "As a neurobiologist, I must tell you that all humans have different thought processes. Some are genetic and some are formed by our individual environments. So that makes Sheldon pretty much like everyone else."

Bernadette had leaned towards me and continued that thought, "That's a fascinating way of looking at it. I only study infectious diseases and toxic viruses, but I do remember learning that in school. Take me; I hate children because I had to watch so many of my younger siblings as a child. So that is the nurture part of the nature or nurture paradigm for me. I'm also short because I take after my mother, who's not tall. So my height is mostly genetic, not environmental. Of course, she smoked while pregnant with me, so that may have had something to do with it as well. Isn't genetics fascinating?"

"Definitely. But enough about science." I liked this woman a lot. She was on my wavelength, for sure. But I saw we were boring Penny, who was not. However, I felt her beauty was enough. I was sure her looks had opened many doors for her in the past and tonight was no exception. I had always wanted to have a beautiful female as a friend and this was my chance. So I decided to change the subject to something Penny would enjoy as well and asked her, "Penny, where do you buy your clothes? I love your outfit!"

She seemed to come alive with that question and replied in an excited voice, "Thanks! I'm a Hot Topic and Forever 21 girl. You want a good look? Go to those two stores. Your outfit isn't bad, though. Where did you get it?"

"The Limited. I was wondering," here I had gathered up my brave and asked, "could we all go shopping together sometime? I need to add more pieces to my wardrobe and Penny, you would seem to be the expert at that. While we're out, Bernadette and I could also talk a little shop."

Penny took a sip from her wine glass and responded, "That sounds good. How does Saturday sound?"

I nodded, "That works very well for me. Bernadette?" I wanted to include my fellow scientist as well. I know only too well the pain of being left out.

Bernadette broke out into a wide smile and squeaked, 'Call me Bernie. Sure, I'd like that. We could go for sushi and then shopping, in either order. We could make an afternoon of it. Does that sound good to you guys?"

At that point, Penny had gotten up to refill her glass and called over her shoulder, "I'm there. So Amy, say we meet here Saturday at noon and go get sushi and then do some serious harm to our credit cards."

I tried my hardest to appear nonchalant, but I don't know how convincing I had been, "Agreed. I will meet you two here at twelve o'clock. It sounds like that could be fun." In all honesty, I'd never gone clothes shopping with another woman but my mother before. I was excited at the prospect.

Bernadette finished her wine and smiled at me, "It's always fun with Penny. Maybe we could get beauty makeovers, too. We haven't done that in awhile, Penny."

Penny had eventually come back and sat down between us, "Sure. Let's give Amy a proper initiation. Are you down for that, girl?"

I continued with my calm, cool, and collected projection, "Of course, it sounds very enjoyable. Thank you for the invitation, Penny."

She gave me a big smile, tossed back her hair adorably and winked at me, "Hey, if you're going to be dating Sheldon, you'll probably be hangin' with us, too. So get used to it."

My cup had been overflowing. I couldn't believe how wonderfully life turns out sometimes. Within the last fortnight I had gained a boyfriend, new girlfriends, and a social calendar to finally mark on my refrigerator. At that moment, life was good. At that moment. But what could go wrong on a shopping expedition? Right?

During our dinner I had noticed that Amy was not really touching her food. I became very concerned about her health. When a person doesn't devour Thai, something must be wrong. I inquired about the state of her health and she informed me that she was not fond of Thai food. Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather. She told me she preferred sushi to Thai. Yuck! She liked raw fish over spicy noodles? Whatever was wrong with her? But she had looked so adorable as she had explained that to me that I instantly forgave her. I certainly didn't understand it, but I forgave her.

At the mention of sushi, Penny had perked right up and invited Amy to go with her and Bernadette for sushi. I had felt relieved, yet not surprised. How could you not love Amy? She was amazing! The girls then made plans to go to O2, their usual sushi restaurant. I had never been there, I'm not that fond of sushi, but I had heard them talk about the place many times. Bernadette made mention of discussing their work while on this social outing and Amy seemed to like that idea. Penny, on the other hand, did not. But what can you do about that? I mean, Penny is a very close friend of mine, but I have never forgotten that she was not on the same intellectual plane as the rest of us. Did that make me a snob? Maybe. But I still liked Penny because for all her lack of a formal education, she had more than her share of common sense and street smarts. If I wanted to be honest with myself, I had benefitted from both of those things in the past and would most likely do so in the future.

I caught Howard giving Amy a look of displeasure. I was not sure where that had come from, but I have never really understood Howard. He's a bit strange. Soon, we men and the ladies each went off with their own group. Howard, Raj, Leonard, and I began to discuss our work. I was informing Leonard that I might need his assistance with a particularly troublesome problem I was attempting to decipher when Howard cut in on our conversation, "Look, Sheldon, I'm sure you and Leonard can talk about that at work tomorrow. I want to know more about why you seem to like Amy. I don't find her pleasant at all."

I was truly shocked and I had to ask him, "Why not, Howard? Everyone else seems to enjoy her company. Just look at her over there talking away with the other girls. They seem to have no problem with her." It was true; the girls had seemed to be getting along with her very nicely.

Howard looked over at Amy and then back at me, "Well, she didn't insinuate that they were gay, like she did to me and Raj."

I had quickly corrected him, "No, Howard. She inferred you and Raj were gay, she didn't insinuate. She was quite blunt about it if I remember correctly."

Howard had frowned at me and replied, "All the same, she rubs me the wrong way, and Leonard, too."

I looked at my friend in amazement and asked him, "Leonard, is that true. Do you find Amy annoying?"

He finished the wine in his glass and told me, "To be honest, Sheldon, yeah, a little bit."

I digested that information for a moment and then smiled broadly at both of them, "Well gentlemen, that just gives me and Amy one more thing in common. Thank you both for your honesty."

Howard then nudged Leonard and told him, "See, I told you he was a crazy bastard."

Leonard held up a hand, "Wait a minute, Howard. He may have a point there. It seems that both he and Amy cause people to have the same reaction to them. Maybe there is something more to their relationship than we thought. I mean, what were the odds of that happening?"

Howard shook his head and then looked over at the door longingly, "Maybe you're right, Leonard, but I still can't wait to get out of here and go home." Raj then whispered again into his ear and he had snapped at him, "Will you just please learn how to talk in front of women? I don't relish being called gay."

Leonard grinned at the both of them and said, "Settle down, Howard. We all know you have a girlfriend, right? The most you could be is bi."

I had to ask, "Bi? What does that mean, Leonard? I know bi is a Latin prefix meaning two, but two what?"

Leonard had attempted to explain that idiom by giving me another, "Sheldon, it means he swings both ways."

I was completely confused at that point and asked him, "Swings on what? I've never seen Howard swing on anything."

Leonard took a deep breath and tried another explanation, "Okay, Sheldon. I'll put it like this; bi means Howard likes girls and guys."

I had thought I finally understood him and said, "Oh really. I didn't know he had that many friends. That is nice to know. I suppose we are all a bit bi, then."

Howard did not look one bit pleased at what I had said and he snapped at me, "Sheldon, just shut up. The girls might hear you."

Now I had become confused once more, "What would it matter if they did?"

Howard pulled me aside and told me, "Sheldon, Leonard was talking about bi as meaning you like both genders sexually."

I finally understood that saying and replied, "Oh. I see. Well I guess Leonard and I are not bi, then. You and Raj? I'm not sure yet."

Howard once again looked annoyed and informed us, "Leonard, I'm taking Bernie home and leaving you with this idiot. Goodnight."

Leonard grinned and waved goodbye to his friend, "See ya later, Howard. Take care."

I put down my bottled water, looked at Leonard and asked, "Did I do something to anger Howard?

He patted me on the shoulder and said, "No more than usual, buddy."

I felt great relief at that pronouncement and began to make my way across the living room, "Okay, then. Well, I suppose now that the evening is winding down, I will walk Amy downstairs to her car."

Which is exactly what I did. As we said our goodbyes with a most memorable kiss, I confirmed to myself that I was most definitely not bi.

 **Well, Sheldon found out he was straight, Amy made some tentative friends, and Howard was now convinced that Sheldon was crazy. Not bad for one evening. Next on the agenda, Amy and Sheldon rescan their brains and Sheldon goes to Amy's place for dinner.**


	12. Chapter 12

`Chapter 12: The Truth Comes Out

 **Amy continues Sheldon's therapy and discovers something interesting about the both of them.**

Amy and I had kept in touch by text and Skyping between that Monday night and our therapy and scanning meeting on Thursday morning. We met for lunch every day, texted each other during the day and Skyped in the evening. I do believe the proper term for our relationship at point was 'moving right along'. We found we had a lot in common and that we enjoyed many of the same things, though our tastes differed in movies and reading material. Still, we had both believed in taking our time getting to know each other before there was a further commitment or a ramping up of our physical relationship. We both knew that was inevitable, but we most definitely didn't want to rush it. Eventually,Thursday morning finally rolled around and I once again found myself navigating the maze of halls that was the biology building. I found Amy's lab and did my usual ritualistic knocking on her door.

She greeted me with, "Good morning, Sheldon! I have booked us two hours in the MEG room today. We will be rescanning our brains and their reactions and comparing the results to our first scan."

I was excited to hear this and looked forward to it greatly. I wanted to see if any of my brain patterns had changed and if so, in what way. I do believe it I hadn't become a physicist I would have taken up some form of neurological study. The human brain, and my own in particular, has always fascinated me. How it works, it capacity for working, the speed with which it works, were all things I have always taken great interest in.

Putting my desire to be rescanned aside, I had another goal that morning. I had made up my mind try and kiss Amy before all the brain work went down, so I approached her and put my arms around her. Before I could plant a kiss on her lips, however, she informed me that this morning she was seeing me in a professional capacity and that she couldn't allow our personal relationship to interfere with that. I hadreluctantly agreed with her and we were soon making our way down the hall to the MEG room.

Once again I had the electrodes placed on my head and was put under the helmet. Amy had the screen set to show me the same pictures in the exact same order as the last time I had this done. We repeated this process with Amy when I was finished. On this day, things ran much more smoothly and we were finished within an hour. We were getting good at this thing.

Amy was so eager to view our results I truly thought she might become apoplectic. But all she said was, "I can't wait to see how we've both progressed, Sheldon!"

We both viewed the scans and were extremely puzzled. I still feared birds, had a negative reaction to children, and had a most positive reaction to trains. However, my brain showed the same responses to the pictures of matrons and the same neutral reactions to sexual subject. This puzzled me. I certainly felt more sexual, why wasn't it showing on my scans?

We next studied Amy's scans and saw much the same thing. Her likes and dislikes remained the same, but her stunted reactions to the images containing sexual situations remained neutral as well. What was that all about?

At this point, Amy came up with an idea that would change the trajectory of our entire relationship. I listened to her scheme and was eager to try it. Maybe, just maybe, the woman was on to something that would explain so much about the both of us and our mental workings.

On that Thursday morning at precisely ten o'clock, I heard Sheldon's unmistakable knock on the door and invited him to come inside. I had been very happy to see him. We had been in constant contact since the dinner party, either Skyping or texting each other daily. We had also made a ritual of having lunch together every day at work. So, our relationship had been progressing in its own, gradual way. We were both cautious, but extremely optimistic that our fledgling relationship was the kind that would last for a long time. Every day I found out something new about the man that either tickled me or was immensely fascinating.

When Sheldon walked into my lab, I informed him that I had booked two hours in the MEG room so we could have both of our brain activity scanned and then compared to the last reading. Sheldon seemed very keen to do this, so everything looked set. Only one thing bothered me. Sheldon made an attempt to let our private relationship intrude on his therapy. He walked over to me and held me in a warm embrace. He then attempted to kiss me, but I had to tell him to stop.

I warned him, "Sheldon, we can't do that now. You are seeing me in a professional capacity and we can't let our relationship interfere with that. For these two hours I am your therapist, not your girlfriend."

To my great relief, he seemed to take my rebuff well and we were soon off to the MEG Room. Once there, I retrieved our files from the cabinet and checked that the same pictures were going to be shown to both of us on the screen. Once that had been determined, I placed the electrodes on Sheldon's head, put him under the helmet, and began the slide show. I recorded his responses and began to notice something that bothered me, though I said nothing to him at that point. I let the slide show finish and then got him out from under the helmet and removed the electrodes from his head.

After I had programmed the same slide show into the computer, I had Sheldon place the electrodes on my head and I positioned myself under the helmet. The slide show began and I let my mind wander where it would. I desired an honest result from this scan, so I tried my best not to think about the results and just focus on the pictures. When I was finished and Sheldon helped me remove the electrodes, I saw him study our results with a frown upon his face.

"Nothing's changed at all in any area! I would have thought us starting a relationship would have altered some of our responses. Do you think our new relationship is not affecting our brains processes? I feel sexual around you and am quite enjoying kissing you. So why does this scan still show me unmoved by pictures of a sexual nature? And why did your brain show the same thing? How can this be?"

"Sheldon," I answered him calmly, "this is a long shot at best, but I've got an idea."

I saw his eyes grow wide and he asked me, "Just what do you have in mind?

I gave him a tenuous smile and walked over to the computer and programmed something into it. "Sheldon, I've altered the paradigm of this scan. We will now both be rescanned and by doing that I hope I find the answer to all of your questions."

Soon, Sheldon was back under the helmet, viewing mostly the same pictures, with one little change. And that change gave us all the answers we needed.

As I sat under the helmet, I viewed all the slides once again, with one major difference. In place of the pictures of naked men and women and acts of coitus, Amy had placed pictures of herself fully clothed. There she was, in her lab coat, in some of her skirt and cardigan outfits, and in a couple of her jeggings and t-shirt ensembles. I had viewed all of the slides the same as before and then moved out from under the helmet and with Amy's help, removed the electrodes from my head.

Then it was Amy's turn and we placed the electrodes on her head and she then sat under the helmet and, as I had, watched the same slides as before, except that the pictures of naked people and coitus had been replaced with pictures of me. Amy then viewed slides of me in my usual attire, dressed up in a suit, and in the black jeans and jacket I had worn on our last date night. When her slide show was finished, Amy raised the helmet and left the chair. We both worked at taking the electrodes off of her head and then we went over and read the results of the scans. Amy's smile grew larger and wider as she viewed the results of her changing the pictures in the slide show.

She looked straight at me and said, "Sheldon, I have just discovered one more way we are alike and it is quite eye-opening."

My curiosity was killing me at that point and I had to ask her, "What do you see?"

Amy grinned and uttered but a single word, "Demisexual."

That one word opened up an entirely new way of looking at both myself and Amy. It also accelerated the trajectory of our relationship immensely.

After Sheldon had taken his turn under the helmet, I took mine. I had my fingers crossed that my little alteration of the experiment would yield the results I was looking for. I viewed the same pictures on the slides as I had seen before, but this time all the pictures of naked men and women posed in sexually provocative poses had been replaced with pictures of Sheldon in his normal everyday clothes, in a very nice suit, and in the outfit he had worn the last time we had met for dinner. When I was done looking at the slides I got out from under the helmet and with Sheldon's help, carefully removed the electrodes on my head. I then read the results of the latest scans and they were everything I had hoped for and more.

As Sheldon viewed the scan results with me, I recognized an amazing brain similarity we shared. I began to smile broadly; I always smile when my hypotheses work out. I explained to Sheldon in an excited voice, "Sheldon, I have just discovered one more way we are alike and it is quite eye-opening."

Sheldon sounded a bit worried as he asked me, "What do you see?"

I looked over at him and uttered the word that at the moment filled my mind, "Demisexual." I then returned to studying the scan results.

"Excuse me?"

I looked up from the printed results and explained to him, "I said demisexual. It seems we are both demisexual."

Sheldon looked confused and asked me, "I'm not understanding you. I have never heard that term before. What does that mean?"

I put down the printouts and took a seat by the machine, Sheldon joined me there. I then expounded on what I had said, "Okay, Sheldon, it goes like this. One's sexuality is sometimes neither black nor white. Some people fall between strongly craving sexual relations and not desiring them at all. It's sometimes referred to as gray-sexuality. Demisexuality is a point on the gray-sexuality spectrum. Let me explain it to you this way; neither of us sees most people in a sexual fashion at all. Photos of the sex act or pornography do nothing for us. Do you agree on that point?"

He nodded slowly, but uncertainly, "Yes, I would say you're correct on that point. But you still haven't told me what demisexuality is."

I turned to him and took his hand, "Simply put, demisexuals only experience sexual attraction to people they can form a strong emotional bond with. Demisexual is often described as being halfway between sexual and asexual, which you claimed you were when we first met. In other words, we have no preference for gender, physical attractiveness, weight, height, or the other superficial reasons most people for sexual attraction to another person. For us, Sheldon, the only thing that gets our motor running is when there is a strong emotional and mental connection with the other person. Admit it; you were no more turned on by me in the form fitting jeggings than you were when I wore the cardigan and skirt. Are you in agreement with that?"

Once again he nodded, but this time he gave my hand a gentle squeeze, "Yes. I thought you looked attractive in your first outfit and I thought you looked attractive in your last one. I even find you attractive in your lab coat."

I had been elated at his saying that as I felt much the same way and I told him so, "Exactly. I enjoyed seeing you in those black jeans, Sheldon. But I was also attracted to you before that. It was _you_ I was attracted to, not your body or your clothes. You have seen how similar our scans are. Because our brains work in such similar fashions, we understand each other far more than others do. That has created a subconscious bond between us that has led to a sexual attraction for each other. It sounds a bit new age, but it is grounded in both the hard and soft sciences."

Sheldon's smile began to grow and his blue eyes gleamed, "I agree, Amy. I was about to dismiss the entire idea as too hippy dippy to be taken seriously, but it does describe me perfectly."

I moved closer to him and added, "And our attraction to each other."

He began to stroke my hair sweetly and asked, "So where do we go from here?"

Now my eyes began to light up, "To my place, tonight at seven. I still have the Yoo Hoo cooling in the refrigerator. We can order Italian food and then just spend some private time together."

At that point, Sheldon threw me a teasing wink and said, "Are you open for some games?"

I winked back at him, "Sure. What type of games, Sheldon?"

He then stood up, put his arms around me and pulled me close to him, "You're just going to have to wait until tonight, little lady."

Before we left to go back to my lab, Sheldon gave me a kiss that sealed the deal. I was his and he was mine and both of us were better than fine with that. It had been a most productive morning.

 **What games do you think Sheldon has in mind for them to play? And how do you think they will both handle being alone together in Amy's apartment? Will there be fireworks or will it fizzle? You will all find out in the next chapter.**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Masters of the Game

 **Sheldon goes to Amy's apartment for dinner, with some unexpected results.**

That night I prepared myself meticulously for the evening ahead. I had never before entertained a man in my home, so this was going to be a novel experience for me. I had finally settled on wearing a very pretty floral patterned dress with a matching cardigan to go with it. I looked ladylike, yet attractive, which was how I had wanted Sheldon to view me that evening. I lit some scented candles and began to prepare the meal I had chosen for us. Sheldon had previously mentioned to me that he loved spaghetti with hot dogs cut up in it. That wouldn't have been my first choice, but he was my guest and that's what I had decided to make. I had not been lying to him concerning the Yoo Hoo. I actually did have a six pack of the stuff in my refrigerator that night waiting for him. But _I_ wasn't going to be drinking a drop of it. For myself, I had purchased a very nice California Chenin Blanc and that was going to be my beverage of choice.

At precisely seven o'clock, (the man was punctual to a fault), Sheldon knocked on my door. _Knock, knock, knock, "_ Amy". _Knock, knock, knock, "_ Amy". _Knock, knock, knock,_ "Amy". I thought to myself that could get real old, real fast, but the neuroscientist in me had realized that this knocking ritual was most likely related to an OCD pattern that brought Sheldon a sense of comfort, so I dismissed my negative thoughts and took another sip of my wine. Truth be told, I had been taking a sip of wine from time to time for the last hour in an attempt to calm my nerves. It had worked wonderfully! By the time I crossed the room to answer the door; I was feeling no nerves or anxiety. I was feeling no pain at all, actually.

I opened the door and greeted him with, "Hello, Sheldon, and welcome to my home."

He looked around for quite a while and finally asked me, "What's with all the candles?

As I made my way into the kitchen I looked back at him and replied, "They're scented. I thought their pleasant fragrances would set the right mood for this evening."

He was quiet for a long moment and queried, "What mood were you aiming for? If it was suffocating sweetness, you have succeeded."

In response to his criticism I went around the room and extinguished all of the candles. I felt like my good intentions had been for naught. Then I had an idea. I asked him, "What scents do find pleasant?"

Sheldon looked around and replied, "I just like things to smell clean and fresh, not cloying like field of flowers or a room filled with fruit."

I made a mental note of that and decided to move on to our dinner. I knew he would like this, he had told me what his favorite meal was and I had prepared it. "What do you say we go over to the dinner table and begin our meal?"

He stopped me in my tracks by saying, "Very well. But please, let me put the game that I brought for us to play on your coffee table. I see no need to be holding it while I eat."

I mentally kicked myself for not remembering to take his coat and bag. I quickly walked over to him and took both of these items from him. As per his suggestion, I put the bag on the coffee table and then hung his coat in the closet. I turned back to him and sincerely apologized for my gaff, "I'm so sorry about that. I should have offered to take both of those things when you first walked in."

His good nature was now restored and he put me at ease by telling me, "No matter. Let's begin our dinner, shall we?"

He sat down at the table while I went into the kitchen and returned with a casserole dish full of his favorite spaghetti and hot dogs. I also poured some Yoo Hoo into his glass. "Is that okay with you or would you rather have it in a bottle?"

He nodded and smiled, "This is fine. More formal dining most generally requires glasses, not bottles, to be at the table. After dinner, from the bottle will do fine."

As we ate, it had pleased me to see the enjoyment on his face. He most definitely approved of the menu and how I had prepared it. I had at least gotten something right. After a bit, we were done eating and I asked him as I cleared the table, "What's in the bag?"

He cocked his head quizzically as if not understanding why I had asked, "Our game for tonight."

I was becoming increasingly frustrated. Whether that was from the wine or the fact that he hadn't yet really answered my question I did not know, but I did my best to respond in a calm, yet inquiring, voice, "I know that. But what sort of game is it?"

Sheldon got up from the table and made his way over to the sofa and sat down, "It is a game that will measure the synchronicity of our minds." He looked up at me and grinned, "Are you up for that, little lady?"

I was a bit nervous about the outcome of this game and if I have to be honest, at that point my mind was a little cloudy from the wine. Still, what harm could be done by playing the game with him? I wasn't passing out drunk, but the way Sheldon's eyes glimmered as he looked at me led me to refill my wine glass yet again before I finally sat down next to him. What could it hurt, right? I was soon to find out.

I had debated as to just what I was going to wear to Amy's place for dinner. I didn't want to get too dressed up, we weren't exactly going out, but I wanted to dress a bit differently than I did at work. I was in a total quandary. I finally decided on my usual t-shirts but I paired them with the pair of tight black jeans I had worn at our last dinner. As Leonard had so kindly offered me a ride to Amy's, I had no trouble with punctuality. I placed the game I was bringing for us in my bag at the last minute and then off we went. I could hardly wait to see what the evening would hold.

When Leonard dropped me off at Amy's building I made my way up to her apartment. When I knocked on her door she greeted me and welcomed me into her home. I liked that gesture very much. However, something had not seemed right. The entire place was filled with scented candles which had been lit for some time, judging by the amount of scent in the room. The smell of jasmine was over powering. I just keep my place clean with Lysol and spray a little Febreeze once in awhile. These candles of Amy's were an assault on the nostrils.

I finally broke down and asked her, "What's with all the candles?"

Amy replied that she had used the candle to set the proper mood. I then asked if the mood she had wanted to set was that of being suffocated by sweetness. That was how I felt and I am always honest. Thankfully, Amy went around extinguishing all of the candles and then asked me, "What scents do find pleasant?"

I answered her honestly and told her I like a fresh and clean smell, not the cloying scent of too many blooming flowers. Anyway, that conversation died quickly and Amy then suggested we sit ourselves at the dining table for dinner. I knew she had made some spaghetti just like my mother's, with little hot dog pieces cut up in it. It is simple fare, I must agree, but I love it regardless. There was one little problem facing me, though. I still had my bag containing the game over my shoulder, on top of my jacket, which made the room too warm and my body not free to sit in the proffered chair at the table.

At that point I asked Amy if I could deposit my bag on the coffee table in the living room. It seemed she had failed to offer to take my bag and coat when I entered her home. I was slightly irritated at that, but instantly forgave her when I saw the look of chagrin upon her face. Amy then took both items from me and placed my bag upon the coffee table and hung my coat in the closet.

That being accomplished she apologized profusely for her gaff and I countered by suggesting we start our dinner, which I was eager to try. I wanted to compare Amy's version of this dish with my mother's. I then seated myself at her small dining table and waited patiently while Amy went back to the kitchen to get our meal. She soon returned with the spaghetti which she had placed in a Corningware dish, which was exactly how my mother served it up. So far, so good. Then the little vixen offered me some Yoo Hoo which she poured into my glass. I have to admit, she was getting to me. I then made a mental note to have dinner at Amy's on a regular basis, if only for the Yoo Hoo. She asked if I would prefer my beverage of choice in a bottle, but I told her that in a more formal dining, which entailed being seated properly at a table, drinks in a bottle were not appropriate. After dinner was another story altogether as I hoped we would be seated on her sofa in close proximity to each other. In that case, a bottle would do fine.

We then commenced eating and I was most pleased. Amy's spaghetti with hot dogs compared most favorably to my mother's in every way. I enjoyed ever bite I took and once again made a mental note about making Amy's home a regular stop for dinner. We eventually finished our meal and she began to clear the table. As she did so, she asked me what was in the bag I had brought with me.

I thought that question a bit odd as I had told her I was bringing a game with me for us to play and I informed her that the bag held that game inside of it. I was beginning to worry about her short term memory. Had the scanning affected that? Was I next? I was more than a little worried about that when Amy put my mind at rest by replying, "I know that. But what sort of game is it?"

I then got up from the table and made my way to the sofa. I explained to her that the game I had brought with me would help us measure the synchronicity of our minds. I then challenged her by asking in a teasing voice, "Are you up for that, little lady?" As I spoke, I took in the pleasant tableau she presented. Her dress of choice only highlighted her obvious femininity and brought out the lovely green of her eyes. Her hair on this evening was lightly curled and shiny. I loved how it captured the lights of the room and reflected them back at me. Amy was absolutely enchanting and I loved looking at her.

At that point, Amy left the living room and brought a wine bottle to the table where she refilled her glass. I had noticed that she had been drinking wine throughout the evening, but I was so used to seeing Penny do that same thing that I had given it little thought. Amy then sat down quite close to me, which gave me an oddly excited feeling in the pit of my stomach. Yes, this was the one woman who could get my motor running. I could hardly wait to play the game I had brought with her. I was also looking forward to doing other things with her but that was for later.

After dinner, I then joined Sheldon at the coffee table in the living room. I had brought my bottle of wine and my glass with me; I suppose I was using both as some sort of security blanket. This would not turn out to be a good move on my part, but more about that later. I watched him closely as he reached into his bag and retrieved a box from its depths. I was now very curious. What sort of game came in a small box? I leaned in to get a closer look and Sheldon then took advantage of the opportunity presented and gave me a short, sweet kiss upon the lips. At that move, I quickly lost my curiosity regarding the game and began to focus on other things, if you know what I mean.

Sheldon opened the box, turned to me, and said, "Now, little lady, I will show you how to play the game. Have you ever heard of Counterfactuals?"

I nodded. I was somewhat familiar with the game. I responded, "Of course. I've played the game many times online. Is that what you've got there?"

He nodded quickly and then went into more detail, "Yes, but these are not the simple, sophomoric drivel you find on the internet. These are questions _I_ have come up with and if you can solve most of these I will rest assured we have a relationship of the minds as well as of carnal thoughts. Are you ready to play?"

Now I was really getting worried, so I took another sip of my wine to help bolster my confidence. I answered Sheldon's question with a weak, "I think so." I swear, it seemed he almost grinned at my show of nerves.

He patted my leg, pulled the first card from the box, and replied, "Very well. Let's begin. Here's the first question: In a world where mankind is ruled by a giant, intelligent beaver, what food is no longer consumed?

That was too easy. I had given my answer with no hesitation, "Cheese Danish. "

He nodded happily and then asked me, "And what is your reasoning behind that answer? "

I smiled at him and responded, "Since people would build a tremendous amount of dams to appease their overlord, the city of Copenhagen would be flooded. This would devastate the people of the city so badly they would never invent that pastry."

Once again, Sheldon had smiled at me in approbation. "Correct. Now, here's the next one. In a world where rhinoceroses are domesticated pets, who wins the Second World War?"

I had encountered no problem coming up with that answer, "Uganda. That was simple."

Sheldon sat up straight and looked me in the eye intently, "Okay, Miss Smarty Pants, what is your reasoning for that answer?"

I smiled even more broadly this time and replied, "Kenya rises to power on the export of rhinoceroses. A central African power block is formed, colonizing North Africa and Europe. When war breaks out, no one can afford the luxury of a rhino. Kenya withers and Uganda triumphs."

Sheldon seemed pleased with my answers and commented on my prowess with, "You play this game very well. Amy Farrah Fowler, I will give you one more question and if you can answer it correctly, we will call it a night and move on to other things." At that he arched his brows suggestively. My head began to spin and I suddenly felt faint, but I managed to nod back at him.

Sheldon then drew the final card from the box and continued, "Now, Amy, here is my final question for you. In a world where a piano is a weapon, _not_ a musical instrument, on what does Scott Joplin play the "Maple Leaf Rag?"

It had seemed to me that Sheldon had left the easiest one for last and I answered him with, "Tuned bayonets."

Now Sheldon seemed excited and he asked me in an eager voice, "Reason?"

I just shook my head at that one, "Oh come on, Sheldon. Isn't that obvious?"

He chuckled more to himself than anything, "Too right. I say we adjourn this session of Counterfactuals and move on with our evening. Do you agree?"

I wanted to answer him in the affirmative, but at that moment the room began to spin and I found myself enveloped in a velvety blackness.

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After we had finished eating I had moved back to the living room and sat on her sofa. Amy followed me soon after and looked at my box in an inquisitive manner. As she leaned towards to better see what the game consisted of I had taken the chance and gave her a sweet kiss on her most attractive lips. But, before I would let that go any further, I wanted to see if she could play the game. A lot hinged on that but I tried not to let her know that.

Amy looked nervous enough without me telling her that and kept taking sips from her wine glass. Before she could get inebriated I had pulled the game from the box and asked her if she had ever heard of Counterfactuals. To my great relief she responded that she was somewhat familiar with the game as she had previously played it online. I then informed her that these were not the vapid, simplistic Counterfactual questions found online. No, these were questions that I had come up with myself and they were quite challenging to the normal person (I had tried these on both Penny and Leonard with little success). I then revealed to her my true motive for bringing this game for us to play that night. I told her if she could answer most of these questions correctly we were most definitely on the path to a deeper relationship, one that went beyond mere physical desire.

I then asked her if she was prepared to begin the game and she answered in the affirmative, though her voice was not strong. I chalked that up to nerves and decided to dive into the game to better get her mind off of whatever was bothering her. I patter her leg kindly and read the first card to her. It was the question concerning the giant, benevolent beaver ruling the world and what food would no longer be consumed. Amy answered that one correctly with no hesitation, whatsoever. I was duly impressed and asked her for the reasoning behind her answer. Once again she was spot on with her answer. I was feeling good about things right then.

I then presented her with the second question, which went like this: In a world where rhinoceroses are domesticated pets, who wins the Second World War? Once again, Amy gave the correct answer without any problem. Now I was getting excited about the whole thing. So, I took a deep breath and asked her what her reasoning had been for that answer and yet again, her reasoning had been perfect.

The only thing left to do was commend her for her answers and give her the final question, which was this, "You play this game very well. Amy Farrah Fowler, I will give you one more question and if you can answer it correctly, we will call it a night and move on to other things." I had hoped my message had been completely understood and by the flush on her face and the look in her eyes, I was fairly certain it had been. So, I gave her what was in my opinion, the most challenging question, "In a world where a piano is a weapon, _not_ a musical instrument, on what does Scott Joplin play the "Maple Leaf Rag?" I had held my breath while waiting for her answer to that one.

"Tuned bayonets."

I was beyond ecstatic and almost forgot to ask her for her reasoning, but I gathered my wits in time and replied, "Reason?"

Her scorn at the ease of the question was readily apparent on her face and she rolled her eyes and exclaimed, "Isn't that obvious?" Which it was, indeed. What a woman! I had finally found my intellectual equal and the world had suddenly become a beautiful place.

I then turned to her and made the suggestion that we end the game and continue on with our evening. I half expected Amy to hug me, kiss me, or show some other form of physical affection, but I was wrong. What did happen is that her eyes closed and she slumped against me, seemingly fast asleep. I attempted to awaken her, but to no avail. Amy was, as they say, out like a light.

The question then became how should I deal with the situation? Amy was my ride home and she clearly was in no shape to drive me anywhere. I suspected her wine had led to this situation. It had happened a time or two before with Penny, but she had been over at our apartment so Leonard had just let her sleep it off on the couch. I wondered if that was the correct response here, but Amy would be alone if I left and I didn't want to leave her asleep on her couch with the door unlocked. That would never do. I couldn't stay the night watching over her, I had to go to work in the morning and I would need a change of clothes and a shower. I was stumped. So, I ended going to what would become my default in the future when dealing with women, I called Leonard. Perhaps he would have an answer.

 **What advice do you think Leonard will give him? And what is to become of Amy and Sheldon? All will be revealed in the next exciting chapter.**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: A Friend in Need

Before calling Leonard, I had looked down at Amy once more and pondered my next move yet again. One part of my mind screamed at me, _'Call Leonard, you idiot! He has been in this situation before and will know exactly what to do.'_ But another part of me was being more prudent. It said, _'If Leonard knows about this he may inadvertently tell Howard and then poor Amy will never live it down.'_ So you see, I was torn. Suddenly, a light bulb went off in my head and I quickly dialed Penny. Penny would know what to do. She had been in this same situation many times herself and she knew better than to let anything slip to Howard.

Her phone rang a few times and then she finally answered. _This better be good, Sheldon. I was just getting ready for bed.'_

 _Penny, it's only nine o'clock. I didn't know you went to sleep that early. That is totally unlike you._

 _Sheldon, I wasn't going to go to sleep._

 _Then I don't see why you would be headed for…oh._

 _Yeah, oh. Now quick, what is it? I have some important things on tonight's agenda._

 _It's Amy. I do believe I am in a very uncomfortable situation here._

 _Is Amy alright?_

 _Oh yes. At least I think so. She had a bit too much wine tonight and it seems she has lost consciousness on the couch._

 _Okay, I understand. But what did you call me for?_

 _Well, as someone who has been known to put it away in the past, what do I do now?_

 _Put a blanket over her and leave._

 _That seems rather cold._

 _Sheldon, in the morning she isn't going to remember much of anything. Trust me._

 _But Penny, I can't leave her here on the couch with her door unlocked. Anything could happen to her._

 _You have a point there. So why don't you put her in her bed and then leave?_

 _She's dead weight right now, Penny. I don't think I can safely lift her by myself._

 _Gotcha. Okay. Look, I have an idea. I'll be over there in about twenty minutes. Don't go anywhere, okay?_

 _Very funny. You feeble attempt at humor failed to hit its intended mark._

 _Sheldon?_

 _Yes?_

 _Do you want my help or not?_

 _Of course I do._

 _Then shut the hell up and give me Amy's address. I'll be leaving in a couple of minutes._

After I had provided Penny with the requested information, we both ended the call and I sat on the couch, waiting. I rather felt like an Arctic explorer waiting for rescue. It was most disheartening. I then looked down at Amy and my heart swelled. Drunk or not, at that moment she had seemed the most beautiful woman in the world to me and I could never have considered leaving her there alone in that condition.

Soon enough, Penny opened the door and came over to the couch, took in the scenario and said, "What's the gist, physicist? How is she?"

"Inebriated, Penny."

Penny looked down and studied Amy's still form, "Yeah, I can see that." She handed me a gym bag, "Here."

I took the bag and asked her, "What is this for?"

Penny then patiently explained to me, "When you look inside you will find all of your usual bathroom stuff. Shampoo, soap, razor, deodorant, all those kinds of things. You will also find a fresh set of clothes."

I hadn't quite understood. Why had Penny brought some of my personal belongs here? So I asked her, "What is all that for?"

Penny then began to explain, "Here's the deal. You and I are going to get Amy into her bed. Then, we are going to make a bed for you on this very couch. In the morning you will be set to shower, shave, get dressed, and go to work. Leonard has kindly offered to pick you up at seven thirty."

I had thought a moment and then responded, "That's nice of him, Penny. But if I stay here Amy can just give me a lift to work."

Penny gave a small laugh and replied, "Trust me, Sweetie. I've been where Amy's at and she is NOT going to be feeling like going to work tomorrow."

I still protested, "But I can't stay here. This is only our fifth date."

Penny rolled her eyes at me and then said, "Sheldon, let me explain something simple to you. I have spent the night at a guy's place on our _first_ date more than once. It's not like no one's ever done it before."

I believed that without a doubt, but I still felt uneasy about the entire situation. I then asked her, "But what will people like, say, Howard and Raj think?"

Penny motioned me to help her pick up Amy, "Uh, they'll be green with jealousy? Rest easy, Sheldon. Leonard won't breathe a word of this to anyone. Okay? You are not here taking advantage of Amy. You are sort of protecting her, like a gentleman from the Great State of Texas is bound to do."

We carried Amy into her room and placed her gently on the bed. That done, I answered Penny, "Of course. You are correct. Thank you for bringing my clothes and toiletries to me. I, as they say, owe you one."

Penny looked around the room and told me, "Let's get that bed made up for you on the couch and we can talk about who owes who what later. Now, do you know where she keeps her pillows and blankets?"

I then crossed my arms on my chest and informed her, "Penny, this is the first time I have been here."

"Okay, okay. Let's see. I'm thinking hall closet. Let's look in there." She then headed out of the bedroom and down the hall.

I remember following her and protesting, "Penny, we can't just go looking through her things!"

Penny had reached the living room by then and looked down at the bare couch, "You want to sleep without blankets or a pillow?"

I capitulated. She was making a lot of sense, "Very well. The hall closet it is." I opened it up and found the Comstock Lode of linens. "Let's see, oh, here they are."

Penny grabbed an armload of blankets and a pillow and thrust them into my arms, "Great. Now, take these and make yourself comfy and I'll go home and get real comfy with Leonard."

I walked over to the couch and deposited the assorted linens upon it. I then turned and asked her, "Penny?"

"Yeah?"

I had been uncomfortable saying it, but it had to be said, "Thank you. You're a great friend."

A smile broke out on her face and she sweetly replied, "Awww. You're welcome, Sweetie. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Say, do you think Amy still wants to hang with me and Bernadette tomorrow night?"

I hadn't even thought about Amy's plans with the girls, so I hadn't been sure what to say. I ended up telling her, "I wouldn't know. But she seemed to be looking forward to it. Why don't you call her tomorrow morning and find out?" That had seemed like the perfect answer to me. Penny had seemed to have other ideas, however.

"If it's all the same to you, I think I'll wait until the afternoon. I imagine she won't be feeling very good until then. Goodnight, Sheldon."

I nodded and then began to make my bed up. I looked over and saw Penny leaving and I gave her a heartfelt, "Goodnight, Penny. And thank you again for your help."

She then left to return to Leonard and I was left to make up the best bed I could on the couch. When I was done with that, I set the alarm on my phone, turned out the lights, and attempted to sleep. My last conscious thought had been, _whatever tomorrow holds, it is bound to be interesting_.

I woke from my black velvet dream and slowly became aware of my surroundings. Surprisingly, I found myself tucked safely into my own bed. I had no remembrance of putting myself to bed, so how had I ended up there? I opened my eyes and just as quickly closed them. My head felt as though the entire UCLA marching band was parading through it. My stomach was exceedingly queasy and my throat was parched. I took stock of the situation and came to the conclusion that I was suffering from my very first hangover. But hangover or not the question still remained, how did I get into my bed?

A noise from the kitchen took my mind off my sorry physical state and focused it on my kitchen. Who was in there and how had they gotten into my apartment? In spite of my pounding head, I knew I had to get out of my bed and find out who was out there. I rolled out of bed and went to grab my robe but realized I was still fully clothed. This was getting curiouser and curiouser. I opened my bedroom door as stealthily as possible and tiptoed down the hall. I had reasoned that if I could get a good look at the intruder I could better describe them to the local police. Step by step, I made my way down the hall and soon found myself at the doorway to the living room. I looked towards the kitchen and, to my great surprise, saw Sheldon Cooper in my kitchen making himself some tea.

I couldn't help myself, I blurted out, "Sheldon, what are you doing here?"

He gave a startled jump and spilled tea all over himself, "Good grief, woman! The next time you feel the need to come up behind me, please give me some warning. Thank goodness I haven't changed into my clothes for today yet."

I couldn't believe what I had just heard, so I asked him, "You have clothes here?"

He nodded and made himself another cup of tea, "Yes."

I walked over to him, noticing the unmade bed on my couch as I did so, "How did that happen?"

Sheldon took a sip of his tea and calmly explained, "Penny brought them to me."

This was getting weird and I blurted out, "Excuse me?"

He put his cup down and exhaled, then began to relate the previous night's events after I had lost consciousness, "I wasn't about to leave you passed out on the couch, so I called Penny and she brought me over some toiletries and a change of clothes. She also helped my get you into your bed."

Oh, so that explained how that had happened, but I still had a question, "She left you here?"

Sheldon looked at me intently, "I wasn't' going to leave you, Amy."

My heart started beating a thousand beats per minute at that look and I replied shakily, "Thank you, Sheldon. Now if you will excuse me, I think I'm going to go be ill."

He called out after me as I hurried from the room, "Very well. When you are done, I have taken the liberty of laying out some Tylenol along with some hot tea for you."

When I had finished being ill, brushed my teeth, and returned, I drank the tea and swallowed the Tylenol. I managed to croak, "Thank you, Sheldon. That was appreciated. Now, I think I will take a shower and get ready for work."

Sheldon looked up from his phone and informed me, "I won't stop you from taking the shower, but you are not going to work today. I have taken the liberty of calling in for you and telling them you were stricken with a severe headache, which I surmise is not far from the truth."

I had nodded miserably, "Again, thank you. Now, can you kindly tell me how you are getting to work?"

He grabbed his bag and was looking inside of it for something, "Penny arranged for Leonard to pick me up here this morning. I do hope you are not perturbed that I gave them your address."

I shook my head and told him, "No, that's fine. Well, I guess you'll be gone by the time I'm done with my shower. So, I'll bid you good day now." I then turned to leave the room but then I felt two hands go around my waist. I had immediately stopped in my tracks and rested within his arms.

Sheldon pulled me closer to him and gave me a hug, "I do believe I will still be here when you are finished. Then we can talk."

I reluctantly pulled away from him, "Okay, Sheldon. We'll talk. But first, let me have my shower." If we were going to start getting physically close, I needed a shower.

He placed a quick kiss on the top of my head, "Very well. We will talk after."

My trusted internal alarm clock was always set to my natural Circadian rhythms and that morning was no exception. At precisely six a.m. I woke up, adjusted my eyes and soon realized that I had spent the night sleeping on Amy Farrah Fowler's couch. The previous evening's events had come back to me perfectly, down to the minutest detail. Have I mentioned to you yet that I have an eidetic memory? Well I do, and it has always served me well. Armed with total recall I padded down the hall to Amy's bedroom, opened the door, and checked on her status. She was still soundly sleeping and appeared to be none the worse for wear.

Feeling much relieved, I went back out to the living room and dug through my bag. I soon produced my favorite tea which Penny and Leonard had so graciously packed for me. I then headed into the kitchen, found the tea kettle, filled it and lit the stove. While waiting for the kettle to whistle I also retrieved my toothpaste and toothbrush from same bag. I then headed down the hall and into her bathroom and proceeded to relieve myself and brush my teeth. Hearing the kettle begin to whistle I quickly returned to the kitchen and poured the water into a cup I had found in one of the cupboards. At that point in time I relaxed and prepared to enjoy my morning beverage.

Suddenly the words, "Sheldon, what are you doing here?" rang out and, startled, I spilled my tea down the front of my shirt. I recognized the voice as Amy's and I quickly reprimanded her for scaring me. I wasn't too upset, however, as I had not yet changed into my work clothes.

Amy responded to that by attempting to ascertain that I had a change of clothes with me. When I answered in the affirmative she then asked me how that had happened and I filled her in on Penny's act of kindness the night before. I was uncertain how she would take that, but Amy seemed to handle the information just fine.

She then cocked her head and asked, "She left you here?"

I answered that by asserting that I had not been about to leave her alone in that condition. Amy thanked me then excused herself to go vomit. I had seen this enough times with Penny, so that didn't faze me at all. In fact, I had rather been expecting it. I then informed her that there would be Tylenol and hot tea waiting for her when she returned.

Amy soon returned to the kitchen, drank the tea, and took the proffered Tylenol. She thanked me once again and stated that she was then going to take a shower and get ready for work. I nipped that idea in the bud by telling her, "I won't stop you from taking the shower, but you are not going to work today. I have taken the liberty of calling in for you and telling them you were stricken with a severe headache, which I surmise is not far from the truth." I knew from watching Leonard interact with Penny during one of her hangovers that Amy needed rest and quiet, not the pressures of work. For once I was glad I had witnessed a few of those mornings between my friends. Those experiences had certainly served me extremely well that morning.

At that point, Amy capitulated and thanked me yet again. She then asked how I was going to be getting to work. I grabbed my bag, rummaged through it, and explained to her that it had already been arranged for Leonard to pick me up and take me to work, like he always had. I told Amy that I hoped she was not offended that I had given out her address. It had seemed I had been faced with no other choice in the matter. Amy assured me that she understood and then told me she was going to take a shower, so she bid me good day. It hit me that I did not want to say good bye to Amy, not at all. So I crossed the room and wrapped my arms around her waist. She felt very good, like a soft, warm, blanket.

I pulled her closer and assured her I would still be there when she was finished with her shower. It would have taken a much stronger man than me to leave her at that point, so I decided to stay with her until she felt better. That is what people in relationships do, they look after each other. Leonard and Penny had always done that, and I had seen Howard and Bernadette do the same thing. So I was going to follow their example and take care of my girlfriend. There, I had said the word to myself; girlfriend. And it hadn't felt bad at all. Yes. Amy was my girlfriend and I was going to take care of her. I then kissed her on the top of her head and told her we would talk after her shower. And I had meant that. I just intended to talk to her. However, things turned out just a little bit differently than what I had planned.

 **I'm not sure of this, but something tells me that Amy and Sheldon are going to do a lot more than kiss. This may finally be getting to the good stuff!**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15: The Relationship Agreement

 **Some things in this chapter and the next will closely resemble canon Sheldon. Other things, well, they won't at all.**

While Amy had been taking her shower, I grabbed my phone and made two phone calls. One was to Leonard, telling him that I would not be in need of a ride to work that day. The other call was to Cal Tech, informing them that I would be taking a PTO day. Amy needed me there to look out for her and I was not about to let her down.

After a few minutes Amy emerged from her shower looking much cleaner, if not any more chipper. I could tell her head and stomach were still in distress and I had searched my mind for an antidote to both but came up empty. I had seen Penny make what she called a Bloody Mary for her hangovers, but I didn't think introducing more alcohol into the situation would help it any. So, I gave her a smile and asked if there was anything I could do for her.

She replied in a tired voice, "I really want to lie down for a bit, but you said you wanted to talk. So let's talk."

"Amy," I reassured her, "if you need to rest, please do that. I am not going anywhere today, so we can converse after your nap."

In response, she came over to me and enveloped me in a warm, wonderful hug. I returned the action and pulled her closely to me while whispering into her hair, "You go get some rest, Little Lady, and we will talk when you have better recovered."

Amy then shocked me by saying, "Thank you, Sheldon, for being here for me. You are the most wonderful man in the world and I love you."

I didn't know the proper way to react to that statement so I went with my gut reaction and pulled her even closer to me and whispered, "That feeling is definitely mutual. Now go get some sleep." I then thought to ask her, "Would it be permissible for me to make myself some breakfast? You may be asleep for some time and I am starting to get hungry."

"Of course you can," she had nswered me with a grin, "make whatever you wish." She disengaged herself from my arms and walked across the room to a corner table. She picked up an oblong object and informed me, "Here is the remote for the television if you would care to watch it."

I had been sincerely touched by that gesture and replied,"Thank you, Amy, but Leonard made sure to pack my laptop and charger in this bag, so I will be entertaining myself in that fashion. By any chance do you have any oatmeal?"

She nodded and replied, "Yes, in the second cupboard from the left, above the sink."

"Then I will be fine. Now, off to bed with you." I gave her behind a gentle smack and sent her on her way. For some strange reason, being there in Amy's apartment felt both right and comfortable. For a man who had always struggled with change and new experiences, this was a most novel feeling, one that I hoped to repeat in the near future.

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I wish I could say that my shower that morning had erased my hangover, but that would be far from the truth. The warm water raining down on me usually felt as if I was standing under a caressing waterfall. That morning, it had felt like a painful assault on my body. The water hitting my head felt like hammers and the rest of my body felt little better. My stomach was still on full alert, which the tea and Tylenol had done little to improve. In other words, I felt like death warmed over. In spite of that, I had washed both my hair and my body thoroughly and had stepped out of the bathroom that morning feeling much cleaner, if not any less hung over. I put on my flannel pajamas and a matching robe and went back to the living room where I was sure Sheldon was waiting for me, eager to talk. What I found was that his first thought was about me. Sheldon had smiled sweetly at me and asked, "Amy, is there anything I can do to help you feel better?" I guess my sorry state was clearly evident, even to a man who had admitted he had great trouble reading people's faces.

I then admitted that I felt the need for a nap, but that I remembered that he wanted us to talk, so I offered to do that instead of napping. Sheldon kindly responded by telling me that if I needed to rest, I should do that and that we would talk later as he was not leaving my apartment that day. I had never had anyone, male or female, display such caring to me before and I went over to him and wrapped him in a big hug of thanks. To my great surprise, he pulled me closer to him and whispered to me in a very sweet voice, "You go get some rest, Little Lady, and we will talk when you have better recovered."

What can I say? I fell hard for the man then and there. Not being one to pretend indifference or practice subterfuge, I laid my head against his chest and thanked him for being there for me. Oh yeah, I also told him I loved him. Hey, sometimes you have to live on the edge, you know?

Once again, Sheldon Cooper surprised me with his response. He hugged me more tightly than before and informed me that the feeling was mutual. The only things that ruined the moment were my queasy stomach and pounding head. He told me to go get some sleep and asked if it would be okay if he made himself some breakfast. I replied that of course that would be fine with me and told him to make whatever he wished. Hell, I'd have called Spago for a caterer if that was what he had wanted. I loved him and I was going to make damn sure he knew it. I also showed him where the remote for the television was, but he responded to that by telling me that Leonard had packed his laptop in the overnight bag and that he was going to keep himself busy with that.

After telling him where the oatmeal could be found, I felt Sheldon slap me gently on the buttocks and tell me to go get some rest. Actually, if it hadn't been for the physical realities of my hangover, I would have loved to stay with him and talk, but I knew I needed rest so I left the living room and headed for my bedroom, hoping with every step I would not be forced to make a stop at the bathroom.

While Amy had been napping, I fired up my laptop and began what would be the most important document of my life; a Relationship Agreement for both me and the wonderful little vixen who had stolen my heart. In this document, I laid out preliminary rules and guidelines for dating, hand holding, kissing, coitus, meeting parents and siblings, deportment at work, and other odds and ends. I also added her name as my emergency contact for work. Hey, sometimes you have to dive in with both feet, don't you?

When I was finished I sat and pondered just what it was about Amy Farrah Fowler that moved me so. I had never found females attractive before this and it wasn't because I desired my own sex. No, I just found females confusing and distressing for me. Until I met Amy, that is. Surprisingly, I had felt no annoyance, no anxiety, and no confusion when I was around her. In fact, being with Amy had been very much like spending time with myself, something I had always enjoyed. I chalked the entire thing up to the fact that she was very much like me in many ways.

Oh, she wasn't exactly like me, she didn't care for science fiction, or comic books, or superheroes, or video games. But the important thing was, she understood why I liked those things and had no problem with me enjoying them. That alone made her special. She was also highly intelligent and our brains worked in very similar fashions. I had to admit it, I loved being around her. We could disagree on things, but we always respected our differences. That made her quite unique and a better partner for me than anyone I had ever known. As I had been deep in these thoughts, I heard a sound behind me and found Amy walking towards the kitchen, obviously finished with her nap. I smiled at her and she walked over to me and kissed me soundly. I realized then and there that I wanted more and that I was more than ready to go there with her. However, we still had some points to discuss before we went any further.

I awoke from my nap feeling much better. Not perfect by any means, but at least I now felt somewhat human. My stomach had settled and my headache had reduced itself to a mild discomfort. I decided that it was time to get out of bed and spend some quality time with Sheldon. He had taken the day off from work to be with me and that's what I wanted, him to be with me. I sat up and realized my throat still felt parched. I had gone into the bathroom, gargled with some Listerine, and headed out to the kitchen. Some more tea had seemed very inviting to me right then.

As I crossed the room I had caught a glimpse of Sheldon deep in thought with a slight smile spread across his face. He looked so adorable I had to stop for a kiss, and what a kiss it was. Far better than what I had imagined it would be. For a man with no experience kissing women, I discovered he was quite skilled. At that moment in time, all I wanted was more of him. My physical and mental need for him had reached new heights. But first I knew we had to talk. Don't you hate it when logic takes over and your libido has to wait its turn? I did, but talking is what we needed to do in that situation.

As I recall, I then broke our kiss, sat down next to him and said, "Sheldon, before this goes any further, we need to talk."

He had turned towards me and took my hands in his, "I was thinking the same thing, Amy. I have given this quite a bit of thought and have written up a Relationship Agreement for us to go over. You are free to debate any point you disagree with. Does that plan meet with your approval?"

I was once again in awe of Sheldon's mind. What he had proposed was very similar to what I had been thinking in my own mind. If it had been possible to fall any deeper in love with the man, that would have done it. I took a deep breath and answered him, "Sheldon that sounds perfect. I didn't want us to be one of those couples that jumps into an emotional and physical relationship without laying down some ground rules. So, yes, what you planned meets with my complete approval."

His smile had grown even wider and he replied, "Yes, it is crazy to go from Point A to Point B without a game plan. You don't go driving to a place you have never been before without a road map.

I had loved it, he was so old school. But I added for amusement, "Or a GPS navigator."

At that, he gave one of his odd little laughs and picked up a printout consisting of several pages from the coffee table. "Here is what I was working on while you were sleeping. I call it the Sheldon Lee Cooper and Amy Farrah Fowler Relationship Agreement. Peruse it and tell me what you think." Which is exactly what I did.

After I had finished reading it I spoke up, "Sheldon, I agree with almost everything in here. I especially liked the part where our date nights were to be discussed by both parties in advance before an agreement is reached. I like that. I also liked where you stated that coitus would only happen when both parties were of like minds. That is very reassuring that I will never be just a 'booty call' for you. But to schedule physical affection such as touching, kissing, and hugging, well, I find that a bit odd. I do believe that as two intelligent adults we should be able to acknowledge which situations and times are appropriate for that sort of thing. Agreed?"

"Agreed. " At that, he picked up a pen lying on the table and ran it through that section. "I will strike that clause from the document. I did love the spontaneity of that kiss you just laid on me. I can see where impulsive tokens of affection can be quite delightful."

I then pointed out a segment of the document I found extremely pertinent to our relationship, "Now, on to where you say that birth control will be the responsibility of both parties. I do not disagree with that take on it, but I must inform you that I have been on oral birth control pills since I was fourteen-years-old. They help regulate my menstrual cycle, which has a mind of its own without them."

I could almost see him breathe a sigh of relief at that pronouncement. He then kissed my nose and told me, "Very well. I am glad you have informed me of that point. That takes a load off my mind."

I had barely been able to stifle a laugh and I asked him, "Intentional pun?"

He had cocked his head quizzically and replied, "Excuse me?"

At that point, I had decided to move on. We had more important issues to explore. So I continued with, "Never mind. Now, on to being tested for STDs. I doubt that is an issue with us as we have never been intimate with another person before. So, I doubt either of us needs to be tested before we proceed. Are you in agreement with that?"

He had looked somewhat concerned and responded with, "Of course. Did I not state that fact in the Agreement?"

I reached for one of his hands and gave it a gentle squeeze, "Yes, but I wanted to let you know I read it and found that particular clause was especially pertinent to our situation, not everyone else's. That breeds a sense of intimacy, does it not?"

He had returned the hand squeeze and grinned happily, "That it does, Little Lady. Now, are you ready for us to sign the Relationship Agreement and move on to other things?"

I teased him by asking coyly, "What kind of 'other things' did you have in mind?"

His eyes began to turn a rich cobalt blue and he replied, "Sign on the last page and I will show you exactly what I meant."

I signed, he signed, and then he took me in his arms. "Now that we are finished with foreplay, I suggest we take this into the bedroom and do some exploring, what do you say?"

"I say, Wooooh!"

Sheldon then picked me up and carried me into the bedroom, "Agreed. Be prepared to have your world rocked."

I had gave a little chuckle and told him, "The first time? I don't know about that."

Then his grin turned absolutely lecherous, "Amy, I went to a person with much experience in the art of physical love making for advice. Trust me, I know how to proceed."

I remember looking at him and asking, "You mean…?"

His tongue had become busy making lazy circles on my neck before he answered, "Yes, I got some pointers from Penny."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and sighed loudly, "Oh, Sheldon, this will be very worth the wait!" There had been no further conversation as he then picked me up and carried me into the bedroom.

Amy and I had been passionately kissing for a short while before she seemed to have read my mind and stopped kissing me long enough to sit next to me on the couch and say, "Sheldon, before this goes any further, we need to talk."

The woman was not only beautiful and intelligent, she was pragmatic as well. What more could a man possibly ask for? I agreed and informed her of the Relationship Agreement I had written for us. I explained to her that I wished to go over it with her after she had read it. Of course, I also told her she was free to disagree with any of the points and rules I had made and we would discuss them. When I asked her if she were agreeable to that, she enthusiastically agreed with what I had done and began to closely examine the document. Amy had made a most amusing joke from my mentioning that a relationship was like driving a car (which I had never done, but the idea was still valid). I stated that one didn't go from Point A to B without a road map. Amy responded with a witty, "Or a GPS navigator" which amused me more than a bit.

When Amy had finished viewing the document she told me that she agreed with most of it, that the rules I set fort for dates and coitus would protect her from becoming a mere 'booty call'. I had to wonder at who would ever do that to such a wonderful woman? However, she did have a problem with my scheduling of other forms of physical affection. She insisted that as two intelligent adults we should be able to discern when the acts of hugging and kissing were appropriate and when they were not. Seeing as how she had appealed to the logical side of me, I found much merit in this and agreed to strike those clauses from the Agreement. I had found her spontaneous kiss rather pleasant and titillating and told her so in so many words.

We then discussed the issue of birth control. I had written that any birth control method we used would be the responsibility of both parties to both agree upon and procure. Amy informed me that she had been using oral contraceptives for many years to regulate her menstrual cycle. That information had put me very much at ease. I loved Amy, but I felt neither one of us would be ready to be parents for quite awhile. When I admitted to her that this would be a load off of my mind she followed that up with a joking comment I did not at all comprehend. Perhaps something had been off with her delivery.

In spite of that minor miscommunication, we proceeded on to the issue of being tested for STDs, which we both agreed would be pointless for the both of us. As this would not be the case with most of today's couples, we both felt that we shared a very special bond and that made both of us feel closer to each other.

Finally, it was time to sign the Relationship Agreement and move on to other, more delightful, things. Amy teased me by asking "What kind of 'other things' did you have in mind?"

I then informed her she would find out exactly what I meant after we had signed the last page of the document. After we had both signed the thing, I pulled Amy close to me and suggested that we take ourselves out of the living room and into her bedroom. I advised her at that point that she was about to have her world rocked. When she raised doubts about that statement, I informed her, while tasting the sweet deliciousness of her neck, that I had sought the advice of Penny, who most certainly knew a thing or two about the art of coitus. Amy had seemed quite excited to find out exactly what Penny had told me and I had been quite excited to show her. So off to the bedroom we went; two virgins who were soon to change their status in that department.

 **What do you think Amy and Sheldon's first time will be like? Find out exactly what happened in the next chapter. Think of this chapter as foreplay and the next chapter will take that to the next step. Curious yet? I am.**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Feels Like the First Time

 **Amy and Sheldon consummate their relationship in Grand Style.**

When we had reached Amy's bedroom, I carefully placed her on the bed and then positioned myself next to her. I looked deep into her amazing jade colored eyes, took my forefinger and traced it across her silky eyebrows and then down her cheeks to follow the line of her jaw. I finally placed my finger under her chin and slowly tilted her head up so her lips could better meet mine. This time there was no hangover or other agenda to stop us. I kissed her gently at first, but then as my desire for her mounted, I had begun kissing her with a passion and an eagerness I hadn't known I possessed. I don't know for sure if it had been Amy moaning or I, but one of us surely was.

Amy broke the spell temporarily by asking, "Don't you think we have way too many clothes on, Sheldon?"

Most definitely." I had answered her, my voice strained with desire. I had wanted nothing more at that moment than to engage in coitus with her, an activity I had avoided all of my life. It had been Amy who had finally ignited the fires of passion inside of me and believe me; those fires were very close to being out of control.

I stood up and began to pull my shirts over my head, but she had stopped me with, "Here, let me do that for you." Amy sensuously lifted my shirts over my head and began to let her hands roam across my chest. Her hands soon found their way down to my waist. I could stand it no longer and I undid my belt and loosened my pants. Once again, Amy's magical hands worked their magic as she reached inside and pulled both my pants and underwear down in one synchronized move.

I then pulled her up next to me and removed her robe as I returned to ravaging her most willing lips. I had never felt feelings like those that were coursing through my body before. At that moment, I had suddenly understood why my friends had spent much of their free time searching for women to satisfy their carnal desires. I was still different from them, however, as there was only one woman who could 'light my fire' and my hands began working their way around her body in much the same way that hers had been exploring mine.

When I had finally removed the last of her clothing I knew I could put off the actual act no longer. My mind and its thoughts dimmed and my body and its demands took over. I'd like to say we took our time and made slow, luxurious, love, but that wasn't the case, at least not the first time. Our bodies met in the middle of a blazing inferno and all we could both think of was quenching the fires burning inside both of us.

I don't remember everything that we did, but I know I spent some time caressing and tasting her beautiful breasts and that wonderful spot where her neck met her torso. I'm afraid I soon became a wild man, demanding more and more and Amy responded by giving more and more, very enthusiastically in fact. I had never known the internal heat of a woman before, but when I first felt it I almost passed out from the insane pleasure it gave me. My strokes became deeper and more rapid as my desire built and then a white light blinded me and I found myself in the midst of the most intense feeling I had ever felt in my life. I became the orgasm and it became me. I must have cried out, I can't see how I could have avoided that. Somewhere off in the distance I heard Amy scream my name and wrap her legs even more tightly around my waist. I do believe I rated our first sexual encounter as a rousing success.

After I had caught my breath and cleared my mind, I rolled off of her and closed my eyes, not quite believing the wonder of what had just taken place. Exhausted as I had been, I reached for her hand and pulled her toward me once again. I whispered to her as I once again began to cup her breasts, "Amy, I never knew how wonderful making love could be. We must do this more often. I have never gotten so much pleasure from something before in my entire life."

Amy propped herself on one elbow and stared down at me, her face flushed and her eyes bright. "That works for me." she said with a twinkle in her eye.

"I take it you found my lovemaking satisfactory?"

She had grinned wickedly and replied, "I do believe I would give you an A+, Sheldon. Call me satisfied."

To make a long story short, we spent the rest of that afternoon honing our skills in the bedroom. It was somewhere around four o'clock in the afternoon when Amy's eyes went wide and she gasped, "Oh my god! I completely forgot I'm supposed to meet Penny and Bernadette tonight for dinner!"

I hadn't completely understood the problem. From what I had figured in my head, Amy had at least two hours before she had to meet them at Penny's apartment. I asked her, "What is the dilemma here? You have plenty of time to get ready."

She then replied to my comment with an earnest, "No, Sheldon, it's not that. I do want to get to know Penny and Bernadette better, but tonight I want to be with you. After today, do you think I can just up and leave you?"

I had been greatly flattered, so I began to stroked her lovely hair and reassured her, "Amy, we will have many, many, nights to be together. I don't want to leave you, either, but you did make a social commitment." At that moment I heard the familiar sound of an incoming text message. I reached over to the nightstand, grabbed my phone and read the message from Penny: _Hey Sheldon. If you guys did what I think you did, I doubt Amy will be wanting to sit around and have sushi with the girls. Tell her we'll meet her at my place tomorrow night at the same time. Have fun, Sweetie and take good care of each other._ I put my phone back on the nightstand and reached for Amy, "It seems Penny has rescheduled your dinner with her and Bernadette until tomorrow."

Amy had sat up and asked in a somewhat concerned voice, "Did she say why?"

I merely shrugged and fed her a little white lie, "Not really. I suppose something came up."

Amy gave a chuckle, "Yes, I suppose something did at that!"

I then pulled her closer and began to kiss her once more. I truly had nothing against something coming up again at that point. Who could have known that my hunger for Amy and her delicious body would be insatiable? Anyway, afternoon turned into evening and evening became night. Between pillow talk, restroom breaks, dinner, and making love, I do believe it was early in the morning before either of us got any sleep at all. Note to self: Why do they call having sexual relations sleeping with somebody? There usually isn't very much actual sleeping involved in the process, is there?

The next morning I had found myself enmeshed with Amy, our arms and legs entwined. What a wonderful way that was to wake up! I decided then and there that I was going to schedule sleepovers with her quite often. Her body was, and still is, like a soft, cuddly, scented pillow just made to snuggle up to and who doesn't enjoy that?

When fully awake, we both had a shower and headed off to a local diner for some breakfast. After the events of the previous evening, even the simple act of eating together had held a special sense of intimacy. We soon found ourselves discussing her plans for the evening.

Right before we reached my bedroom, Sheldon had scooped me up into his arms and then carried me over to my bed, where he gently put me down. He then managed to lie down next to me and seemed to drink in my presence. His gaze was intent, wanting, and tender, all at the same time. I then felt his finger begin to caress my face, starting at my eyebrows and working its way down to my chin. It was rather like he was drawing a sensual Braille map of my face. He then took two of his fingers and lifted my chin level with his.

The kiss that followed started off softly, but soon grew with a ferocious intensity. It was as if we had both been dying of thirst in a parched desert and had come upon a lake in an oasis. We drank greedily of each other with a passion I had never before experienced. I wanted him to kiss me deeper and deeper with an endless, bottomless kiss. My hip had begun to grind against him with a wanton will of their own. My body and soul ached for more and I wanted him to give me just that; more. I heard him moan and meet my hips with his. The time had come. There were to be no more postponements or delays. Desire was beating reason now, and all I could think of was my need to feel his naked body on mine.

To that end, I asked him in a breathless voice, "Don't you think we have way too many clothes on, Sheldon?"

He had answered in the affirmative, his exact words lost to me now, and we began to sensuously remove the clothing from each other's bodies. I loved the lean muscling of his torso, the flat, muscled stomach melding with his lean hips and long, slender legs. I love what I saw and I wanted more of it. His lips took mine, not longer softly but with the savagery of a wild animal catching prey. I surrendered completely and soon became lost in a world of frantic caresses, demanding lips, and aching want. No other man had ever been able to ignite such feelings in me. I was no longer a respected female neuroscientist; I was a female tigress, lithe, writhing, and ferocious.

Then the moment of penetration came. I had expected pain, but felt only a minor discomfort that soon gave way to wild sensations of intense pleasure. His strokes and moans soon told me he was experiencing the same wondrous feelings. The flames of our passions climbed higher and higher and suddenly my entire body became white hot with a throbbing release. Wave upon wave of pleasure enveloped me and I called his name as my legs instinctively wrapped tightly around him. I heard my lover loudly invoke the name of a deity, arch his back, and then collapse on top of me. Nothing was said for a few moments as we were both incapable of speech. Without being told, I knew we had both surpassed every expectation we had held of each other as lovers.

Eventually, Sheldon rolled off to one side of me, then reached blindly for my hand and pulled me close to him. He caressed my breasts in a lazy manner and I recall he whispered softly to me something along the lines of, "Amy, I never knew how wonderful lovemaking could be. We must do this more often."

What could I say? I had agreed with that completely so I propped myself up on one elbow to better view him and replied in a teasing manner, "That works for me." God, he was beautiful after sex!

He then opened his eyes, smiled at me, and asked, "I take it you found my lovemaking satisfactory?"

I replied happily that I would have given him and A+. We then cuddled drowsily in each other arms until the fire grew to fever pitch once more. Our second time was less frantic, more sensual, but the end results were the same. Both of us were lost in the amazing sensations of orgasm. Again and again and again. Sheldon was tireless and my desire for him seemed to have no limits.

Eventually we took a break for lunch and I made us a quick meal of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. Eating across a table from your lover was a new and very intimate experience for me. I drank in Sheldon's face; his large blue eyes, his dimples that appeared every time he smiled broadly or laughed, and his finely shaped lips that were almost raw from our endless kissing. That day, he was everything I had ever wanted or needed all in one man. I loved him deeply and without reservation and I could see he felt the same way about me.

It was after yet another round of lovemaking that I peeked over his shoulder at my alarm clock and saw that it was late in the afternoon. I wondered lazily if Sheldon was planning on spending the night with me. Suddenly I remembered that I was supposed to meet Penny and Bernadette for dinner in about two hours. I panicked and exclaimed, "Oh my god! I completely forgot I'm supposed to meet Penny and Bernadette tonight!"

Sheldon had made an attempt to calm me down by reminding me that I had plenty of time to prepare for that evening. I explained to him that a time crunch was not what concerned me. I admitted to him that I didn't want to leave him. I asked him if he felt that it would be easy for me to just get up and leave him. Sheldon then gave me the sweetest smile as he played with my hair and told me that we would have many nights to spend together, but that I did have a social obligation with Penny and Bernadette to fulfill.

Suddenly, we had both heard Sheldon's phone announce he had a text message. He reached over and grabbed his phone from the nightstand and read the message it held. He smiled like the cat that ate the canary and told me, "It seems Penny has rescheduled your dinner with her and Bernadette until tomorrow." When I had asked him if Penny had told him why, he responded with a shrug of his shoulder and said, "Not really. I suppose something came up."

I then made the obvious witticism about something, indeed, coming up and we spent what remained of the afternoon and into the evening enjoying each other in a most intimate way. And yes, something did indeed come up. Several times.

The next morning, I awoke to find Sheldon asleep, his arms and legs wound around me. This was a unique experience for me as I had never actually slept with anyone before, in any interpretation of the word. I hadn't minded it one bit and remembered how Sheldon had said we must do this more often. He was right, of course. I soon roused him and suggested we each have a shower and then get some breakfast. He heartily agreed and within the hour we were seated across from each other at a local diner, discussing my coming dinner with Penny and Bernadette.

I looked across the table at Amy and asked her, "Just how much of what has happened between us will you be discussing with Penny and Bernadette?"

Amy had simply smiled back at me and reached her hand out across the table for one of mine, "I will merely give them both some general information. Any dirty little details will remain private between the two of us."

I couldn't help but smile back at her and I replied, "You do know you are allowed to brag about my sexual prowess, do you not?"

Amy sweetly shook her head and told me, "Sheldon that would lead both of them to asking questions I wouldn't feel comfortable answering. I will, however, throw in some hints that you are quite a stud. Is that agreeable to you?"

I winked back at her and made a lighthearted comment, "We've both come a long way from the first time we testing our brains with that MEG machine."

"I agree completely. I would think our brains would now…" Then Amy suddenly stopped talking and her eyes grew wide. A huge grin broke out on her face and her lovely eyes had begun to twinkle merrily.

I became curious as to what was on her mind when suddenly it hit me. My eyes took on an eager look themselves and I asked Amy, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

She began to nod and then whipped out her phone. Amy looked me straight in the eye and responded, "Excuse me Sheldon; I have to make a phone call."

Thirty minutes later we were in her car, excitedly hurrying towards our next adventure. My eager anticipation made it almost impossible to sit still. I kept wishing the car to go faster, for once in my life ignoring the danger of that. Finally, we arrived at our destination and I looked at Amy and she looked back at me. This was going to be good.

While we had been finishing up our breakfast, Sheldon had asked me in a somewhat worried voice, "Just how much of what has happened between us will you be discussing with Penny and Bernadette?"

I had responded by informing him that I would be giving them both only the most general information about what had transpired between us the night before. I assured him that any intimate details would be kept strictly between the two of us.

Sheldon then surprised me by giving me a mischievous smile, winking and adding, "You do know you are allowed to brag about my sexual prowess."

At that point I didn't know whether to take him seriously or not, so I explained that those two ladies would most likely ask me questions I was not prepared to answer if I had done that. Seeing Sheldon's face fall a bit, I did my best to console him by saying, "I will, however, throw in some hints that you are quite a stud. Is that agreeable to you?"

That had seemed to mollify him a bit, as he threw me another wink and remarked that we had both come a long way since the first time we had used the MEG machine to scan our brains. I made the proper response and began to say that our brain scans would most likely be far different now, when suddenly the light bulb went off in my head and I knew exactly what I wanted to do with Sheldon after breakfast.

My face must have given me away because Sheldon's face lit up like a Roman Candle and he asked me, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" I then pulled my phone out of my purse and made a quick call to a friend of mine.

 _Jerry, can I make a reservation today for about 2 hours? What? The rest of the day is open? Great! I'll be there in about an hour. Say again? No, I can't tell you right now, I have a guest with me. Yeah, that's who it is. Very intuitive Jerry. Like I said, we'll be there in about an hour. Okay. See you later._

Sheldon seemed to know very well what my plan for us was and where we were going. I have never been able to keep secrets from that man and that day was no different! Sometimes that's good, and sometimes not so good. That day it was good, thankfully. We were both eager to get on our way, so we quickly paid the bill for our meal and headed out to my car. This was an afternoon neither of us would ever forget.

 **Where is Amy taking Sheldon and why is he so excited about it? I promise you, the next chapter will be eye opening…and steamy.**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17: Behind Closed Doors

 **Where is Amy taking Sheldon and what does she have planned?**

Just as I had thought, Amy drove us directly from her apartment to Cal Tech. We entered the biology building and made our way to the MEG Room.

Amy unlocked the door and said to me in an excited voice, "I can't wait to scan our brains again and see if there have been any changes."

I had decided to be the rational one and answered her, "Just because we have become sexually involved does not mean our scans will change. If you recall, the last time we did this we already had some pretty good reactions to pictures of each other."

As we entered the room, Amy turned to me with a bit of a rebuttal, "Sheldon, I've been doing studies like this for many years. I'm going to go out on a limb and say our brains will no longer show any sexual repression of any kind."

I countered that one with, "Okay, Miss Smarty Pants, what are you willing to bet?"

Amy sighed and then volunteered, "Well, Sheldon, if our brains show no change I will bite the bullet and join you for Halo night next week. But if I win…"

She had me extremely curious at that point. Her face held a very wicked smile, so I asked her, "If you win, what?"

She walked over to me and looked around the room, "If I win, do you have the guts to christen this room with me?"

I was totally confused. I had to ask her, "Christen? What do you mean? It's not a human being. How do you christen a room?"

Her smile got even wider and she winked teasingly at me, "By doing something in it you have never done in it before."

"What would we do?" I had no idea what she was getting at, and then it came to me. "Oh. Very well, Amy. You're on."

She chuckled slightly and led me over to the MEG machine. After applying the electrodes Amy sat me in the chair, went to the cabinet and retrieved our files, and programmed the computer to begin the slide show. I sat in the chair the same as always and I felt no different when I viewed the slides, but from the look on Amy's face, something had definitely changed.

When I was finished, Amy insisted on using the machine on herself before we both viewed the results. I went along with that. Comparing our brain activity side by side held a certain fascination for me and it did not take much persuasion on her part for me to agree with that protocol.

After Amy had taken her turn under the helmet, we rushed to the table to compare our results. I was in shock. There was absolutely no sexual repression visible in any sector of either of our brains. While I had still experienced a strong negative reaction to birds, by response to women was far more favorable and the less clothing they wore, the more positive my reaction had been. This was much more in line with what our society views as being a 'normal' male. My response to middle aged women was still somewhat negative, but pictures of them no longer solicited a strong hate reaction from me.

Amy's scans revealed that any fear, anger, or repression of sexual feeling and impulses were completely gone. Her scans revealed a young woman with a most healthy attitude towards her own sexuality and sexual issues in general. We had both come a long way from our first scan and I owed it all to one amazing little lady named Amy Farrah Fowler.

After a bit, Amy turned to me and asked in a voice coated with seduction, "Well, Sheldon? Are you ready to pay off on our bet?"

I simply nodded. Something told me that in this situation it was best to let her take the lead. And what a lead it was!

As I drove us to our destination that day, many thoughts were swirling through my head. On the one hand, I was a woman in love who had just had her first sexual experience with a man she deeply loved. That should have been occupying my thoughts all by itself. But as a scientist I was also pondering how our brain functions may have been altered by our 'knockin' boots'. The former had me giddy with delight. So did the latter. I sometimes feel that I am an emotional dichotomy.

When we arrived at our destination, Cal Tech I had noticed that Sheldon was not the least bit surprised we were there. They say that all great minds think alike and on this particular day that was very, very, true. Once out of the car, we had headed straight for the MEG Room. I could hardly wait to redo our scans. As we entered the room, I told Sheldon, "I can't wait to scan our brains again and see if there have been any changes."

Sheldon interrupted my train of thought by stating his opinion strongly. He felt that just because we were now lovers that did not mean our brains scans would have changed. For good measure he added the point that our brains had already reacted strongly to each other's picture on the slide show.

I took all of that into consideration and countered that with, "Sheldon, I've been doing studies like this for many years. I'm going to go out on a limb and say our brains will no longer show any sexual repression of any kind."

It was then that Sheldon suggested a little side bet, you know, to keep things interesting. We settled on this: if our brain scans remained the same, I would join him and his cronies on the following Wednesday night to play Halo (shudder). If there had been changes in our brain activity, I challenged him to find the cajones to christen the room with me. At first he failed to understand my meaning and I had to hint at what I meant by 'christen the room'. When at last he understood, he agreed to my terms. So sure was I of the outcome, I had placed Sheldon in a win/win situation. No matter what the outcome, he would be pleased.

I decided that Sheldon should go first, so I applied the electrode once again to his head and helped him to get situated under the helmet. I then pulled both of our files out of the filing cabinet and set the computer to show the same slides as before. Sheldon sat quietly and viewed the slides while I jotted the results down in his file. I had hoped my face did not give the results away, but I was afraid it had done just that very thing.

When his slide show was completed, I informed him that I wanted to take my turn getting scanned for the simple reason I wanted to compare our scans side by side. Sheldon seemed to embrace that idea wholeheartedly, so I had him help apply the electrodes to my head and place me under the helmet. He then started the program on the computer and I watched the same slides as Sheldon. I was curious as to what the results would be, but I managed to keep my mind focused on the slides in front of me.

When I had disengaged myself from the electrodes and the helmet, I hurried over to the table to compare our results. As I studied them, l found that they proved my hypothesis beyond the shadow of a doubt. Sheldon's scan showed no evidence of any sexual repression whatsoever. While he still had his phobia regarding birds and his love of trains, he now viewed pictures of women in suggestive poses in a fashion very much like those of any male in his age range. He still held negative association with pictures of middle aged women, but they were no longer hostile.

My scan was very similar to Sheldon's. All of negative associations with my sexual side were no longer there. They had vanished, vamoosed, and taken a hike. My results showed a young woman who held no fears or distrust regarding her sexuality. My scans had looked rather normal for a woman of my age, really. And I owed this transformation to none other than Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper. If I hadn't started working with him, none of this would have happened.

I held that thought for a minute and then turned to Sheldon and asked him if he was ready to pay off on the bet we had made. To my great surprise, he didn't try to argue his way out of it or become petulant in any way. He simply smiled at me and nodded. I had sincerely hoped he knew what he was agreeing to and that he would enjoy it. I knew I sure would.

Amy grinned and went over and locked the door. She then went into a closet and pulled out and extra set of electrodes. I was confused. Hadn't we already done our scans? She then walked over to me and handed the extra pair to me.

"Sheldon, let me put those on you."

I couldn't decipher her intent, so I inquired, "What for?"

Amy waved me off with her hand and replied, "You'll see in a minute. Just humor me here."

"All right."

She then surprised me by saying, "Now, let's take the original pair and put them on me."

Now I was completely confused. I blurted out, "Whatever for? We've both already been scanned."

She gave an evil chuckle and responded, "Not together."

This still didn't make sense. I stared and the machine and queried, "Oh, can we both watch the screen at the same time?"

Amy was busy with the computer and had her back to me as she answered, "Sheldon, we're not going to be watching the screen."

I pointed to the electrodes on my head and inquired, "Then what are we wearing these for?"

She turned around and handed me the second set of electrodes, "Like I said, you'll see in a minute. Now help me put these on."

I was still confused, but I did as she had asked me. Whatever she was up to, it was making her smile and that was always good.

Amy then looked around the room and checked again that the door was locked. She then came over to me and began to kiss me. Very, very, skillfully I might add. I decided to respond, it wasn't difficult to do when the woman you love has her tongue in your mouth.

Suddenly, she backed off and said, "Are you ready to pay up, Dr. Cooper?"

This had to be part of that bet I made with her, so I replied, "Of course. But I must ask you again, what do you have planned?"

"Sit in the MEG chair."

I lodged a protest, "What? Why? I've already been scanned."

She wouldn't give me a clear answer to that. She just said in a preoccupied voice, "Please, sit down."

I decided that a bet was a bet and sat down in the seat of the machine, wondering just what Amy was up to.

She walked over to me and asked, "Wouldn't it be fun to have our brains scanned while we're, well, you know."

I didn't know, so I asked her, "While we're what?"

She winked at me and answered, "Here, let me show you." And she proceeded to sit on my lap and kiss me. I must say, I figured it out pretty quickly and moved to remove her top.

I looked up at her and inquired, "You're sure the door is locked?"

"Positive."

Then Amy kissed me some more and her hands got busy on my chest and abdomen. I responded by feeling every inch of her body I could with my own hands. My excitement mounted and I moaned. As if using that as some sort of cue, she somehow managed to pull my pants down to my ankles and then straddled me while I was in the chair. I wasn't sure what to do next, but I soon figured it out. My hips rose to meet her body and I was in Heaven. This was once again, hot, pulsating, mad sex and once again my head exploded as I climaxed. I am sure her responses were similar because she cried out and then fell off the chair. I wanted to see our scans, but I didn't have the strength left to move. Yes, it had been that good. That night I found out that Amy was very inventive, as well as flexible.

After a few minutes I asked her, "Are you going to be able to make it to Penny's tonight?"

Amy pulled herself off of the floor and stared me in the face, "Sheldon, look over at the computer."

I turned my head and saw smoke rising from it. We looked at each other and said at the same time, "I think we overloaded it." We then dressed quickly, returned our files to the cabinet and the electrodes to the cupboard, gathered our things and turned off the computer and the lights before we beat a hasty retreat down the hall.

When we reached her car, Amy informed me, "I'll drop you at your place and then I'll go meet Penny."

I was in no small amount of distress at the thought of spending the night without her so I asked, "Do you mind if I go home with you after?"

She wrapped me in a tight hug and kissed me soundly before saying, "I thought you'd never ask."

While driving home, I made a suggestion to her. "We could make up a schedule for sleepovers tomorrow."

Amy turned to me and smiled, "That sounds like a good idea. We may have a lot of sleepovers, though."

My smile grew ever wider and I suggested, "We could make them fun. We could build a fort in your living room and tell scary ghost stories."

Amy turned and winked at me, "Or something else."

I laid my hand on her leg and gave it a little squeeze, "Definitely something else."

When we pulled up in front of my building, Amy gave a sad little sigh and said, "Well, here we are. May I call you when I am done with Penny and Bernadette?"

I nodded and affirmation and told her, "Of course. I will most likely be up with Leonard, Howard, and Raj. So feel free to do that."

She opened the door of her car and then quickly closed it. She turned to me with her eyes shining and asked, "Sheldon?"

"Yes."

Her eyes shone like fluorescent emeralds as she stated, "You were amazing."

I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheek. I didn't I know quite what to say to that so I went with the truth, "So were you. Now, go and make the other ladies green with envy."

With that, we went up the stairs and I went to my apartment and Amy went across the hall to Penny's.

Amy grinned and went over and locked the door. She then went into a closet and pulled out and extra set of electrodes. I was confused. Hadn't we already done our scans? She then walked over to me and handed the extra pair to me.

"Sheldon, let me put those on you."

I couldn't decipher her intent, so I inquired, "What for?"

Amy waved me off with her hand and replied, "You'll see in a minute. Just humor me here."

"All right."

She then surprised me by saying, "Now, let's take the original pair and put them on me."

Now I was completely confused. I blurted out, "Whatever for? We've both already been scanned."

She gave an evil chuckle and responded, "Not together."

This still didn't make sense. I stared and the machine and queried, "Oh, can we both watch the screen at the same time?"

Amy was busy with the computer and had her back to me as she answered, "Sheldon, we're not going to be watching the screen."

I pointed to the electrodes on my head and inquired, "Then what are we wearing these for?"

She turned around and handed me the second set of electrodes, "Like I said, you'll see in a minute. Now help me put these on."

I was still confused, but I did as she had asked me. Whatever she was up to, it was making her smile and that was always good.

Amy then looked around the room and checked again that the door was locked. She then came over to me and began to kiss me. Very, very, skillfully I might add. I decided to respond, it wasn't difficult to do when the woman you love has her tongue in your mouth.

Suddenly, she backed off and said, "Are you ready to pay up, Dr. Cooper?"

This had to be part of that bet I made with her, so I replied, "Of course. But I must ask you again, what do you have planned?"

"Sit in the MEG chair."

I lodged a protest, "What? Why? I've already been scanned."

She wouldn't give me a clear answer to that. She just said in a preoccupied voice, "Please, sit down."

I decided that a bet was a bet and sat down in the seat of the machine, wondering just what Amy was up to.

She walked over to me and asked, "Wouldn't it be fun to have our brains scanned while we're, well, you know."

I didn't know, so I asked her, "While we're what?"

She winked at me and answered, "Here, let me show you." And she proceeded to sit on my lap and kiss me. I must say, I figured it out pretty quickly and moved to remove her top.

I looked up at her and inquired, "You're sure the door is locked?"

"Positive."

Then Amy kissed me some more and her hands got busy on my chest and abdomen. I responded by feeling every inch of her body I could with my own hands. My excitement mounted and I moaned. As if using that as some sort of cue, she somehow managed to pull my pants down to my ankles and then straddled me while I was in the chair. I wasn't sure what to do next, but I soon figured it out. My hips rose to meet her body and I was in Heaven. This was once again, hot, pulsating, mad sex and once again my head exploded as I climaxed. I am sure her responses were similar because she cried out and then fell off the chair. I wanted to see our scans, but I didn't have the strength left to move. Yes, it had been that good. That night I found out that Amy was very inventive, as well as flexible.

After a few minutes I asked her, "Are you going to be able to make it to Penny's tonight?"

Amy pulled herself off of the floor and stared me in the face, "Sheldon, look over at the computer."

I turned my head and saw smoke rising from it. We looked at each other and said at the same time, "I think we overloaded it." We then dressed quickly, returned our files to the cabinet and the electrodes to the cupboard, gathered our things and turned off the computer and the lights before we beat a hasty retreat down the hall.

When we reached her car, Amy informed me, "I'll drop you at your place and then I'll go meet Penny."

I was in no small amount of distress at the thought of spending the night without her so I asked, "Do you mind if I go home with you after?"

She wrapped me in a tight hug and kissed me soundly before saying, "I thought you'd never ask."

While driving home, I made a suggestion to her. "We could make up a schedule for sleepovers tomorrow."

Amy turned to me and smiled, "That sounds like a good idea. We may have a lot of sleepovers, though."

At that suggestion my smile grew ever wider and I suggested, "We could make them fun. We could build a fort in your living room and tell scary ghost stories."

Amy had turned and winked at me, "Or something else."

I laid my hand on her leg and gave it a little squeeze, "Definitely something else."

When we pulled up in front of my building, Amy gave a sad little sigh and said, "Well, here we are. May I call you when I am done with Penny and Bernadette?"

I nodded an affirmation and told her, "Of course. I will most likely be up with Leonard, Howard, and Raj. So feel free to do that."

She opened the door of her car and then quickly closed it. She turned to me with her eyes shining and asked, "Sheldon?"

"Yes."

Her eyes shone like fluorescent emeralds as she stated, "You were amazing."

I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheek. I didn't I know quite what to say to that so I went with the truth, "So were you. Now go and make the other ladies green with envy."

With that, we went up the stairs and I went to my apartment and Amy went across the hall to Penny's.

After Sheldon had agreed to pay up on our bet, I gave him a quick smile and walked over to the storage closet and retrieved another set of electrodes. He looked a bit confused at this, so went to him and placed the extra electrode set in his hands and told him, "Sheldon, let me put those on you."

He had given me a quizzical look and asked, "What for?"

I then informed him that he would soon find out and he reluctantly agreed

When that had been accomplished, I returned to the computer table and grabbed the original electrode set and asked him to put them on my head.

He seemed a bit worried at that point and demanded, "Whatever for? We've both already been scanned."

I had to give a little laugh at that point and told him, "Not together."

He then asked if we could both be watching the screen at the same time. I had to tell him that my plans did not include watching the screen. Not at all. Of course, he then wanted to know why we were both wearing the electrodes on our heads. Hey, it was a logical question, which I put off answering by asking him to help me place the electrodes on my head.

Once everything was ready, I checked the door once more to make sure it was locked securely. I then began my experiment. I went over to Sheldon and began kissing him in a very passionate manner. I then stopped the kiss and asked him if he was ready to pay up on our bet. He acknowledged that he was, but inquired once more as to what I had planned.

I merely told him, "Sit in the MEG chair."

His voice began to rise and he responded in a most reluctant manner, "What? Why? I've already been scanned."

I then answered him by again telling him to have a seat in the MEG chair.

He followed my directions and sat down in the chair. I then approached him and revealed my plan to him. I stated, "Wouldn't it be fun to have our brains scanned while we're, well, you know."

It seemed I was going to have to spell it out for him because he looked up at me with an earnest expression on his face and replied, "While we're what?"

I then gave him a wink and sat on his lap. Of course, there was some pretty hot kissing involved at that point. The next thing I knew his hands were under my top and he began to take it off. I think he was getting the idea of what I had planned. He looked at me and asked in voice filled with passion if I was sure that the door was locked. At that point, I knew he was completely on board with my little experiment.

I answered him in the affirmative and we then let nature take its course. Our hands groped, clothing was removed, and soon we were entering heaven in a MEG seat. My need was great, but his was greater and he matched me thrust for thrust, gyration for gyration, and moan for moan. I soon felt the by now familiar hot pulsing in my body and I was soon engulfed in pure ecstasy. When I came my body jerked so hard I lost my balance and fell off the chair. Sheldon was at that moment having his own orgasm so he was too preoccupied with that to stop me. No harm done, though, as the chair was not very far off the ground. Eventually, cogent thought returned to me and I became curious about what our scans would look like.

As I turned to look at the computer, I heard Sheldon ask, "Are you going to be able to make it to Penny's tonight?"

At that, I rose from the floor and told him to look over at the computer, which was now emitting a cloud of smoke. We both simultaneously remarked, "I think we overloaded it."

Fearing discovery, we quickly got dressed and replaced the electrodes in the cupboard and returned our files to the cabinet. We then picked up our personal belongings, turned off the lights, and got the hell out of there.

When we got to my car I told Sheldon, "I'll drop you at your place and then I'll go meet Penny."

To my great surprise, he looked at me with puppy dog eyes and asked, "Do you mind if I go home with you after?"

I then went to him and hugged him as tightly as I could while answering in the affirmative. Another night with Sheldon? Yeah, I was there.

Sheldon put forth a most practical suggestion to me as we were driving home. He said it might be a good idea for us to make a sleepover schedule, which I was quite agreeable with. I added, "We may have a lot of sleepovers, though."

That remark had made him grin like the cat that swallowed the canary. He told me that for fun, we could build a fort in my living room and tell each other ghost stories. That was not exactly the type of sleepover I had been planning, so I added, "Or something else."

He then squeezed my leg and replied, "Definitely something else." I then found myself warming up to the idea of a fort, believe it or not.

When I had parked in front of his building I felt a little sad to be leaving him. I gave a little sigh and asked him if I could call him when I was done with visiting Penny and Bernadette.

In response he made the comment that it would be fine if I did that because he would most likely be spending the evening with his friends as well. I opened the car door and then quickly closed it as I had one more thing to say to him.

I asked him with no little urgency in my voice, "Sheldon?"

He looked over at me with a question mark written all over his face, "Yes?"

I gathered up all my courage and told him, "You were amazing."

He responded by hugging me and giving me a sweet kiss on the cheek. He then instructed me to go and make Penny and Bernadette jealous. We then exited the car and entered the building. When we reached the fourth floor, he went to his apartment while I crossed the hall and knocked on Penny's door. I wondered what was in store for me that evening, but decided not to worry about it. Wrong!

 **So Amy's off to spend the evening with the girls and Sheldon is doing the same thing with the guys. I wonder what will be said about the change in their relationship. Will Cal Tech find out who fried the computer in the MEG room? Read on.**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18: The Big Reveal

 **Amy and Sheldon spend some time with their friends. This will be a very interesting evening.**

I had left Sheldon and approached Penny's apartment with no little trepidation. From what I had seen, Penny was beautiful, bubbly, and self assured. The same kind of girl who used to make my life a living hell during my school days. But this was not school and Penny hadn't struck me as mean. In fact, I figured she must have actually been a kind and caring person. I mean, she had helped Sheldon out the night he was stuck at my place. I decided to trust her, so I knocked on Penny's door and waited for her response. I didn't have long to wait. I quickly heard a "Door's unlocked, Amy. Come on in!"

As directed, I opened the door and walked inside. I saw Penny and Bernadette sitting on the couch, each with a glass of wine in her hand. I took a seat on a chair near the couch and looked around the room. "This is a very nice place you have here. I love the open floor plan."

Penny had given me a warm smile and then replied in a voice that sounded pretty darn welcoming, "Thanks, Amy. Can I get you a glass of wine?" Things were starting off on the right foot, all right.

I smile over at her and told her, "That would be nice. Do you have any white?"

Penny's face lit up and she over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle from the counter, "Sure thing. I've got a nice bottle of Chenin Blanc I got on sale at Costco."

Well, she was thrifty, anyway.

I took the wine glass she offered me and took a sip. Not bad for Costco. Maybe Penny could become my wine connection. "This is pretty good. You got this at Costco?"

She nodded and grinned, "Yeah. On my wage as a waitress, I can't afford to be choosy where I buy my hootch."

Bernadette then piped up, "Penny always has the best wine. It may not be fancy, but she's got a lot of it and she loves to share."

I gave a laugh and replied, "That works for me." I was feeling quite comfortable sitting there with my wine, until Penny said,

Penny had looked at me with a teasing tone in her voice and asked, "Speaking of sharing, what happened with you and Sheldon the other night?"

I had answered her truthfully, "He slept on the couch and I slept it off in my bedroom. By the way, thank you for helping him that night."

Penny dismissed that with a wave of her hand, "It was nothing. Sheldon and I go way back. So, nothing happened, huh?"

Once again, Bernie's high pitched voice had cut in, "She said nothing happened _that_ night. What about the next day. Penny told me that Leonard said that Sheldon never made it in to work the next day."

I hedged a bit on that one, "Well, he took care of me until I sobered up." It was the truth, just not all of it.

"And then?" both ladies leaned forward and asked in unison.

I really hadn't known what to say. I mean, I hardly knew them. How could I tell them something that intimate? I ended up saying, "That's a little private, don't you think?"

Bernie put her wine glass down and laughed, "I think Sheldon and Amy did the Wild Thing!"

Penny's faced filled with surprise, "Nah! Did you really? I mean, did _he_ really? Did you guys, you know…"

I took a sip of my wine and confessed, "Yes, Penny. Sheldon and I made the proverbial beast with two backs."

Penny then got this disappointed look on her face and responded, "No, I was asking if you guys did it."

Bernie looked over at her friend and explained, "Penny, that's what that means. It's from Shakespeare."

"Oh. So you did do it. C'mon girl," she said pointing to me, "we need details."

I had failed to see why that was necessary. So I explained to her, "Penny, from what Sheldon has told me, you are very familiar with what goes on between a man and a woman during coitus. I doubt we did anything you haven't seen or done yourself." At the time, I thought it best to leave the part about wearing electrodes on our heads and doing it in a scanning room to myself. I didn't want them to think we were weird or anything like that.

Bernadette had given a loud gasp and exclaimed, "My god! She even talks like him!"

I sipped my drink and nodded at her, "That is most likely why we are attracted to each other. We are of very similar minds."

I distinctly remember Penny had started pleading with me, "C'mon Ames. You don't have to give us all the dirty details, just the good parts. Was he any good?"

I had decided the truth was the best answer. After all, Penny had asked for it. "If you mean did I reach orgasm? Yes. Several times. That is what the entire idea about engaging in coitus is about, is it not? Unless, of course, you are using it to procreate. Then sexual release is of secondary importance. At least for the female."

Penny's face turned red and she began to look very uncomfortable. For a woman who engaged in sexual relations on a regular basis, her discomfort was confusing to me. Bernadette turned to me and asked, "How about Sheldon? Did you manage to ring his bell?"

I had liked the woman's directness, so I answered her, "Judging by the sounds he emitted, I would say he enjoyed himself to the maximum level more than once."

Penny drained her glass and got up for a refill, "I'm sorry. I'm just finding it hard to visualize Sheldon Cooper coming.

I addressed her problems with visualization by telling her, "I assure you he did. He had the normal response for a male engaged in intercourse for thirty minutes."

Bernadette almost spilled her drink and squeaked, "Thirty minutes? He went thirty minutes?"

I turned to her and responded, "Just the first time. I have heard that one is the quickest and it was. We settled down to a normal time frame of an hour or two the other times we 'did it'."

Penny's eyes had grown exceedingly wide, "Other times? How many times did you have sex?"

I thought about that one for a minute and answered, "I'm not sure. We lost count after awhile. At least six or seven."

Penny's mouth then dropped open and she drained her glass yet again. "Holy crap on a cracker! You're sure you were with Sheldon?"

I nodded again, "Of course." Why had she been having such a problem with this?

She began again, "Wait. Sheldon _Cooper_. The tall guy who lives with Leonard?"

I held up my glass for a refill and Bernadette did the honors. I then turned my attention back to Penny, "Yes. I was with Sheldon Cooper. Why are you having trouble with that? You did set him up to spend the night at my apartment, didn't you?"

She still hadn't looked like she believed me, "Yeah, but _Sheldon_ Cooper? Has a fear of germs, loves Dr. Who, and calls fucking, coitus? _That_ Sheldon Cooper?"

I still hadn't understand her problem with the events of the day before, but I hastened to assure her, "Yes, Penny. _That_ Sheldon Cooper. Now, if we've exhausted that item of conversation, what do you ladies say we talk about something else."

After that, the conversation turned to fashion and food and the ladies offered to take me shopping at the mall the next weekend, to which I agreed happily. We then headed out to get us a bit of sushi. Now that was something all of us had in common and we had a very good time that night. Bernadette and I talked shop while Penny and I conversed about our favorite handbag and shoe designers. I was now more comfortable discussing those things with other females. That had become how I rolled.

After I had said my goodbyes to Amy I let myself into the apartment and was met by a bevy of silly grins. I was upset that they might have been smoking a substance I did not allow in our home, so my response had been a judgmental frown, which drew a puzzled look from Leonard.

Howard had been the first one to speak, "Geeze. You'd think a guy would be smiling right after he got laid for the first time. I know I looked like the village idiot."

My response had been quick and to the point, "You should have. It was your cousin."

Howard had suddenly looked very uncomfortable and replied, "She wasn't my first cousin, Sheldon. Sheesh."

I had shaken my head, put down my bag and then made my way to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, "Close enough. Anyway, I frowned because I hadn't expected to be met by a bunch of idiotic grins. I hope you weren't smoking something illegal."

Leonard finally spoke, "Hey, Buddy. Calm down. Nothing of any kind was smoked here. We were just smiling because we were happy for you. Besides, it has been legal to smoke marijuana for years now."

I had felt driven to remind him, "Not where I live, it isn't. Did you read that section of the Relationship Agreement?"

Leonard had sadly nodded and waved the comment off with his hand, "Yeah, l did. Enough about that, Sheldon. We were smiling because we were all just excited to see you."

I had taken a sip of my water and commented, "I see. And I suppose you were expecting me to share all of what you call, 'the juicy details'. Am I correct?"

Raj then interjected "Well, we were hoping you enjoyed yourself. And if you didn't, we wanted to give you some pointers."

What could I have said? Wasn't the primary purpose of having coitus with your girlfriend enjoyment? I had responded to Raj's remark with, "No worries. I did. And so did Amy. And now, I'd like to enjoy a rousing game of Halo."

Howard's mouth had dropped open and he exclaimed, "That's what you've got on your mind? Halo?"

I hadn't completely understood his amazement, so I asked him, "Why not? That is what we agreed to do tonight. Didn't we?"

"Well, yeah. But it's not every day that you have sex."

The conversation had become ridiculous, so I replied "I would hope not. Leonard and Penny notwithstanding, that would be exhausting. I mean, how many days can a person spend six hours on a single activity besides work?"

Leonard had bellowed, "Six hours? You're kidding right?"

I then took another sip of my water and replied with some concern, "Not at all. Were we doing it wrong? I thought it took that long for everyone."

Howard was the first to answer, though he did have a worried look on his face, "Of course it does. We were just kidding you." Somehow, I didn't quite believe he was telling the truth, but decided to let that slide. I wanted to get to playing Halo before Amy returned from her night out with Penny and Bernadette.

Eventually, we fired up the old Xbox and the game began. I was doing fairly well; I have to admit that I am a great shot and am masterful at strategic planning. Suddenly my phone had announced that I had a text message. I briefly put down my game controller and picked up my phone. There was a simple text from Amy which read, _I have finished dinner with the girls. Miss you. I'm just across the hall. Xoxo._

Without further ado, I put down the controller and informed my friends, "I hate to end my part in this game, but Amy is back from dinner with the girls."

Howard had rolled his eyes in pretended disdain, "One night of sex and he's already whipped."

I then stood up and addressed his comment, "Howard, I must correct you. If I leave right now, that will be _two_ nights of sex. Surely you would do the same thing."

Leonard laughed, "No doubt about it. He wouldn't even tell us goodbye. He'd just be out the door. Trust me, he's done if before."

I had grinned and replied, "Yes, I have been here on some of those occasions. Gentlemen, I bid you good night."

With that, I gathered up my keys, my overnight bag with my toiletries and change of clothes inside, left the apartment and crossed the hall.

I knocked on Penny's door in my usual manner, *knock, knock, knock* Penny. *knock, knock, knock* Penny. *knock, knock, knock* Penny. Instead of seeing Penny's face as the door was opened, I found Amy's pretty face staring back at me with a most happy grin spread across it. Now that our friends knew about us, we could spend more time together and not have to explain what we were up to. Like that night. But more about that later.

 **What do you think Amy and Sheldon will do from here? I have a pretty good feeling about this couple, don't you?**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19: The Aftermath

 **Our two lovebirds are reunited. I wonder what they have planned for the evening. Just kidding.**

 **Penny and I had both heard Sheldon's unique knock and before she could get up from the couch I bolted from my chair and met him at the door.** There he was. The man I loved and adored standing in front of me with a silly smile plastered across his face. Never had a face looked more welcome to me.

I greeted him with a smile and a cheery, "Hello, Sheldon. Thank you for coming over so quickly. Do you have your things with you, a new change of clothes?" He nodded and waved at Penny as I went to grab my purse. Soon, we were both headed down the stairs and out of the building. In a surprising show of affection, Sheldon reached for my hand on the way down to the lobby and never let go of it until we reached my car.

As we drove down the street towards the freeway entrance, Sheldon had asked me, "Amy, do you think we should pick up some items for breakfast? When I was making myself some breakfast yesterday, I was in the mood for some orange juice and tea and I see that your kitchen has neither in it. Some oatmeal would be nice, also."

I remember looking over at him fondly and replying "Sure, Sheldon. We can stop by the store close to my building and pick up whatever we think we will need."

With that, we headed for my place and had a very insightful discussion on the way there. It had started with me asking him, "Sheldon, I didn't give too many details to Penny and Bernadette. I just shared that we both enjoyed the experience. Is that alright with you?"

He had given my leg a reassuring pat and responded with, "I find that perfectly fine. I shared much the same information with Leonard and the others. It still seems strange to me that that they all wondered whether we had both enjoyed our coupling. That is the reason, aside from procreation, that one has coitus, is it not?"

I had answered that with a chuckle and a grin, "I know, right? The girls asked the same thing. Does that mean that Leonard and Howard don't always please them?"

Sheldon shrugged and looked like he wanted to move on to another topic, "I have no idea and I'd rather not go there. The mental images are too disturbing."

I recall enthusiastically concurring with him on that one. "Agreed. Well, here's the store. Let's get out, get our breakfast supplies, and get home so we can begin to spend some quality time together."

As Sheldon found a cart and pulled it free from the rack, he had turned to me asked, "Say, do you suppose we could pick up some spaghetti and hotdogs?"

That hadn't seemed too extreme, but my curiosity had been piqued. So, I replied, "Sure. Why do you ask?"

His answer had seemed completely reasonable, "I was wondering if we could have that for lunch tomorrow. My mother used to make that meal for me and I always enjoyed it."

I moved closer to him as we walked and answered his inquiry with, "That sounds like a good idea, Sheldon. Let's do that." My mother had always told me that the way to a man's heart was through his stomach, so this was as good a time as any to see if that saying was true.

When we were done shopping we had headed back to my apartment and I made us both a soothing cup of tea. Sitting at my breakfast bar, we both discussed the events of the last two days.

I had been the first person to address the elephant in the room, "So, did your friends give you too much grief over us having coitus and becoming a couple?"

Sheldon stared down into his tea cup and mused, "I suppose they did a little, but that is to be expected from them. For the most part, though, they were happy I was happy." He then looked up at me and asked," How about Penny and Bernadette?"

At that, I simply shrugged my shoulders and replied, "Sheldon, I haven't been friends with them for years like you have been with Leonard, Raj, and Howard. The dynamic was different. They just wanted to know if you had pleased me, which I assured them you had. We then went out to sushi and we talked about fashion and science."

Sheldon had given me a startled look and gasped, "Dear lord, you talked science with Penny?"

I had shanken my head and laughed a little, "No. With Bernadette. But not for long. Penny began to look bored so we switched the topic to going to the mall, which we are all going to do next weekend."

Sheldon then took a sip of his tea and mused, "I sometimes wonder why Bernadette is friends with Penny, besides their men being friends, that is."

I hastened to correct him, "Sheldon, you know yourself that Penny is funny, kind, and caring. Why would Bernadette _not_ want to hang with her?"

He gracefully conceded that point, "You're right, as usual. I suppose there is more to friendships than IQ points. Look at me with my friends."

I had been confused with that statement and asked him, "What do you mean, Sheldon? All your friends have high IQs."

His look had been extremely smug as he replied, "Yes, but not compared to me. And Howard doesn't even have a doctorate."

I had then felt safe to admit to him, "I haven't really been able to warm up to Howard. I find him somewhat creepy."

Sheldon gave me a tsk, tsk, look and said, "Amy, really now. Just consider the source. He's quite harmless, just a little socially inept."

I had found myself agreeing with him. How could I not? "Of course. I understand now when you explain it like that. I will try to be more tolerant of his social shortcomings in the future."

The topic then turned to our sleepover schedule. Sheldon suggested Friday and Saturday nights, but I suggested we throw every other Tuesday into the mix as well. He seemed fine with that idea and then we decided to watch some television before we went to bed. Here we hit a snag. I had wanted to watch a PBS special on the Bronte sisters while Sheldon insisted on viewing a National Geographic program on Super Telescopes. This dilemma was solved by him watching his show on the television and me streaming my show on my laptop. With a set of headphones for each of us, harmony had once again been restored and we were each able to enjoy our respective programs in peace.

After our shows had ended we had finally made our way to the bedroom. We were both tired, but still in need of cleaning both our hair and our bodies. I was first in the shower, which at the end of a long day felt both refreshing and relaxing at the same time. When I had finished, I threw on my nightgown and robe and entered the bedroom, where I found Sheldon sound asleep on his side of the bed. He looked rather innocent and peaceful laying there, but I knew he would have been very upset with me if I had failed to wake him up so he could also take a shower. So, I had made the decision to walk over to the bed and gently shake his shoulder. Sheldon was so startled by this that he must have jumped a foot off of the bed and fell with a 'thud' on the floor. I then took a step back from the bed and stared down at him.

Amy?" he asked me, a puzzled expression covering his face.

I was still staring at him as I replied, "Yes, Sheldon?"

He had managed to prop himself up on his elbows and said, "Can you please explain to me what I am doing on the floor?"

I then gave him my hand and helped him up off the floor, "You were asleep and I attempted to shake your shoulder to wake you up. It seems you startle easily."

He brushed himself off and responded, "I don't usually, but no one has ever shaken my shoulder when I've been asleep before."

I couldn't help it, at that point I grinned at him and laughed a little, "Well , now we know. Don't shake you awake."

He had smiled back at me and asked, "Why were you trying to wake me up?"

I pointed towards the door behind me, "It's your turn for the shower."

He nodded to himself more than to me, "Of course. How silly of me not to think of that." With that, he found his bag next to the bed, gave me a quick kiss, and headed into the bathroom.

 **As Amy and I set off down the stairs for her car, I had suddenly remembered that as her boyfriend, it was proper social protocol to hold her hand in such situations.** When I reached for it, I found that her hand gave mine a gentle, loving, squeeze. I can't say I found it uncomfortable. For once, my fear of germs had not entered into my thought process and I merely squeezed back. Our hands did not separate from each other until we had reached Amy's car, which had been parked in my always vacant parking spot. For once, I was glad I had never learned to drive a motor vehicle and, therefore, had an available parking slot for my lady.

Within a couple of minutes we were driving towards the freeway. As we drove along a brilliant thought popped into my head and I had asked Amy if we could stop at a store to get some breakfast supplies, like orange juice and tea, which I had discovered her kitchen did not possess. I added oatmeal for good measure.

At my suggestion, Amy had briefly turned to me and sweetly replied, "Sure, Sheldon. We can stop by the store close to my building and pick up whatever we think we will need."

With that settled, we resumed our trip to Amy's home. On the way, we discussed the discussions that had gone on between us and each set of friends. Amy had appeared a tad nervous and she inquired as to the nature of the discussion I had shared with Leonard, Howard, and Raj. She had explained to me that she had given no details to the ladies except that we had both enjoyed ourselves. I had both liked and admired her style and candor on the subject and I found myself giving her leg a fond pat.

I then revealed my conversation with my friends by stating, "I shared much the same information with Leonard and the others. It still seems strange to me that that they all wondered whether we had both enjoyed our coupling. That is the reason, aside from procreation, that one has coitus, is it not?"

Amy then planted a most disturbing mental picture in my mind. She stated in a concerned voice, "The girls asked the same thing. Does that mean that Leonard and Howard don't always please them?"

As I had felt no desire to pursue that particular topic I told Amy that I had no idea and that I did not care to go follow that particular train of thought. Amy seemed to have agreed with me and we soon arrived at her local Ralph's.

As I picked out what I deemed the best cart for our grocery quest, I suggested to Amy that we could also purchase some spaghetti and hotdogs for the next day's lunch.

Once again, Amy had been agreeable to my request, but asked me in an inquisitive voice, "Sure. Why do you ask?"

I then informed her that my mother had prepared the dish for me when I lived at home and that I had always enjoyed it. Having secured her agreement on the subject we then headed into the store and commenced shopping. When we had finished with that we made our way out to the car and then to Amy's apartment, which was very close by.

After we had put away the groceries Amy made us both a relaxing cup of tea and we settled back and discussed all of the adventures and discoveries we had made together in the last two days.

Amy smiled at me and asked if my friends had given me a lot of grief over us having been intimate and beginning a relationship. I admitted that they had, but not to any great degree. I then asked if Penny and Bernadette had done the same thing.

In response, Amy said something very deep, which showed me once again the level of her intelligence. She shrugged her shoulders and explained to me that as she had not known Penny and Bernadette anywhere near as long as I had known Leonard, Raj, and Howard, there had not been quite the same basis for any teasing. She informed me that the ladies had just wanted to know if I had pleased her during coitus, which she assured me she had told them that I had. Amy went on to say they had mostly talked about science and fashion.

At that moment, my mind went into shock and I managed to blurt out, "Dear lord, you talked science with Penny?" If Amy had gotten Penny to gab about science, she possessed powers I had never before seen in a woman, or anyone else for that matter.

Amy had laughed a little and explained that she had talked science with Bernadette, but when Penny became bored they talked about all going to the mall the next weekend. That made more sense. Penny had about as much interest in science as I had in the Kardashians.

I then mused on why Bernadette was friends with Penny, for which Amy soundly rebuked me, reminding me of all of Penny's good qualities which, I had to admit, were many. I then confessed to Amy that she had been correct. Somewhere deep inside of me I had realized that a person's intelligence meant little if they were not kind and trustworthy as well. I used my friends and me as an example.

Amy had not understood what I had meant by that example. She made the point that all of my friends had relatively high IQs.

I then reminded her that, yes; they were all fairly intelligent, but not as intelligent as I was. I drove the point home by pointing out that Howard had not even earned a doctorate degree. I mean, what else did I have to say?

Amy then admitted something to me about her feelings regarding Howard. She told me, "I haven't really been able to warm up to Howard. I find him somewhat creepy."

I had been somewhat shocked by that admission. I felt that Amy had been missing the big picture. I reminded her to consider the source and to take into account Howard's basic social shortcomings. I mean, the man tries, but he can come off as a little strange sometimes.

I saw Amy nodding and she agreed with me that given his social ineptness, we both had to try a bit harder to be more tolerant of Howard's more annoying mannerisms.

The next subject we tackled was that of our sleep over schedules. I started it off by informing Amy that I thought every Friday and Saturday night would work well for us. Amy added to that by adding every other Tuesday into the mix. I couldn't argue with that. Wednesdays were Halo nights and I wouldn't miss Halo night for anything, even dinner and coitus with Amy. I also spent most Thursdays at home with Leonard, watching a movie or playing some video game or another with him. Of course, Penny had been known to join us on occasion, so on those nights when Penny showed up, I made a mental not to call Amy and invite her over as well.

With that being settled we decided to sit and watch some television. Here we hit a snag as we enjoyed entirely different programs. Amy had picked a PBS special on the Bronte sisters, which I knew would bore me to tears. I wished to watch an exciting National Geographic show focused on Super Telescopes. How could she not get excited about watching that? Well, she managed to find a way so we settled on each watching our own show on different devices. I had watched Nat Geo on the television while Amy streamed the Bronte sisters on her laptop. Peace had been restored at last.

When we had finished watching our shows, Amy and I headed off towards the bedroom. She used the shower first, as was her right seeing as it was her home. I decided to lie on her bed and close my eyes for a minute. The next thing I knew I was dreaming there was an earthquake and that the shaking had caused me to roll off of the bed.

I awoke as I landed on the floor and looked up to find Amy staring down at me. I couldn't figure out why she was there, I suppose I had still been half asleep, however, I managed to get out, "Amy?"

She was still staring at me and answered, "Yes, Sheldon?"

I somehow managed to prop myself up on my elbows and inquired, "Can you please explain to me what I am doing on the floor?"

Amy then explained that I had been sleeping and she had shaken me in order to wake me up. Well, that explained the earthquake of my dream. Amy then held out a hand to help me up, which I gladly accepted. She also remarked that it seemed to her that I startled easily.

By this time I was back on my feet and informed her that I didn't usually startle very easily at all, but someone had never shaken me while I was asleep before. Up until the first time I had slept with Amy I had always considered sleeping a most solitary occupation.

Amy then smirked at me and gave a chuckle, "Well, now we know. Don't shake you awake."

I gave her a smile in return and inquired as to why she had felt compelled to wake me up. She pointed towards the bathroom door and informed me that it was my turn to use the shower. Suddenly all the pieces fell into place and I was fully cognizant of my surroundings once more. I felt silly for not having realized the need for me to shower, but I chalked it up to being extremely tired after the events of the past two days. I then admitted as much to Amy, grabbed my bag from the floor and went through the door to shower.

When I later emerged feeling clean and refreshed, Amy gave me a seductive look and patted the bed next to her. I may have been new to the art of love, but I did not need a written invitation to know that Amy was 'warm for my form', as they say. I then joined her on the bed and took her in my arms and inhaled deeply the intoxicating aroma of her jasmine shampoo and body wash. I was suddenly extremely hungry, but not for food. My lips found her lips, my tongue found hers, and I was soon lost once again in a tidal wave of passion that filled both my body and my mind. We explored each other's bodies in an intimate manner and as our desires began to rise, Amy's body had begun to tremble and shake beneath me. When she called my name and wrapped her legs tightly around me, I had felt yet again, the blinding flash and rush of pleasure that signaled sexual release and the end of our lovemaking. I do believe we both fell into a deep, contented sleep after that, wrapped in each other's arms. I felt the new closeness oddly fascinating and fulfilling and I was definitely looked forward to doing this with her again.

 **Sheldon made his way over to the bed when he had finished his shower.** I gave him an unspoken invitation to join me on the bed, which he most readily accepted. Sheldon took me in his arms and began to kiss me, at first sweetly and then with more and more passion. One thing led to another and we soon found ourselves having a frenzied coupling. My passion rose ever higher until, once more, I entered the land of sexual bliss and I uncontrollably trembled and wrapped my legs around his torso, urging him to go deeper, faster, and join me in the explosion of passion I was feeling. He soon cried out himself and collapsed on top of me, spent from the experience. I had wanted to tease him with "Better than Nat Geo" but I realized that didn't matter at that point. Soon enough, we snuggled deep into each other's arms, whispered private endearments to each other, and fell fast asleep.

 **Everything seems perfect for these two, doesn't it? Not so fast. The next day was Monday and there was still the issue of the smoking computer to deal with. How will they explain that one away?**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20: There's Trouble Brewing**

 **The next morning I woke up and once again had the wonderful opportunity to see Sheldon asleep next to me.** Let me tell you something, that feeling never got old. Sometimes you just know someone is the perfect fit for you. Know what I mean? Anyway, as soon as I left the bed to start my morning coffee, Sheldon stirred and came out to see what I was doing.

He had wrapped his arms tenderly around me and asked, "Amy, do you need any help with that?"

I wished we could have stayed like that forever, but I had known we had to get ready for work. So I found myself replying, "No, Sheldon. According to your schedule, this is your time to use the bathroom and get ready for work."

His arms released me and he sighed, "Ah yes. I do suppose my teeth need a good brushing. I do hope I brought some toiletries with me in my bag. I refuse to go without anti-perspirant and my morning shave."

I had turned to him and, with more confidence that I felt, attempted to allay his worries, "Have no fear. I took the liberty of searching your bag for those very items last night. I apologize if I overstepped my boundaries, but I didn't want to drive all the way back to your place this morning to fetch them."

His arms then went back around me and I went back to Heaven as he had whispered softly in my ear, "Amy, if it was anyone else but you who looked into my bag I would be incensed. But I understand why you did it." He then released me once more and continued his thought, "Actually, I'm glad. A disaster would surely have been avoided if you had found those things missing. I feel obligated to thank you for your mindfulness. Goodness knows my mind was not operating at full capacity last night." I had not been able to contain the grin that spread across my face, "I don't know, Sheldon. You seemed pretty on top of things last night."

Sheldon had given one of his odd little laughs and asked, "Intentional pun?"

I winked at him and said, "What do you think?"

He then planted a kiss on my cheek and told me, "I think you're a vixen Amy Farrah Fowler."

If my memory hasn't failed me completely I then kissed him back on his cheek and pointed towards the hall, "I'll take it. Now go and clean up. I will still need to do that when you are finished."

Sheldon had nodded and then looked around the room, "Very well. You know, I could get used to this."

My heart had begun to pound excitedly as I asked him, "What is 'this'?"

Sheldon stopped his progress across the room, turned, and answered me with, "Staying the night with you. You are very easy to be around."

I think at that point my heart had actually skipped a beat. Of course, I had kept my cool and responded with a smirk and another finger point towards the hall, "Thank you, Sheldon. Now go!"

At that, Sheldon had come back over to me, smacked my bottom, and chuckling under his breath, made his way to the bathroom.

 **The next morning I had woken up and discovered that Amy was no longer beside me in the bed.** I heard some noises coming from the kitchen and went out to investigate. I discovered the sounds I had been hearing were coming from Amy preparing to make her morning coffee. She had been a wonderful sight to see first thing in the morning, unlike Leonard whom one did not want to view for at least thirty minutes after he awakened.

In fact, Amy looked so inviting that I came up behind her and wrapped her in an warm embrace. I had felt lost as to what to say to her so I settled on the trite, "do you need any help with that?" I wanted to hold her in that embrace forever, but Amy then became the practical one and reminded me that we had to get ready for work and that is was my designated time to use the bathroom for my morning rituals. In spite of my heart, my head took over and recognized the logic in her pronouncement. I very reluctantly removed my arms from around her waist and made some vague comment about brushing my teeth and looked around for my bag, which I had left by the couch. My concerns got the better of me at that point and I voiced my worries that my toiletries had made the trek with me to Amy's place.

Amy has always known just what to say to calm me down in situations where I am upset and that morning was no different. She assured me that she had double checked my bag the night before to ensure that my personal affects were there. She then apologized to me for possible overstepping any of my boundaries by explaining that she had not wanted to make the trip back to Pasadena in the early morning if the items were missing.

I had been very moved by this and my arms had somehow found their way back around her waist as I nuzzled her ear and told her, more or less, that her actions met with my full approval as I completely understood her reasoning behind them. I remember admitting to her that my mind had not been firing to its fullest capacity the night before. I further remember telling Amy that I was indebted to her for her thoughtfulness.

Amy then looked up at me with the most beautiful grin on her face and replied, "I don't know, Sheldon. You seemed pretty on top of things last night."

The double entendre of her remark had not been lost on me and I responded with a chuckle and "Intentional pun?"

She winked at me lasciviously and asked, "What do you think?"

I truth was, I thought I was in love and I kissed her tenderly on the cheek and called her a vixen, which in my eyes was the truth. Smart, cunning, and beautiful. That was my Amy in a nutshell.

She then gave me the sweetest kiss on my own cheek and pointed towards the hall and told me to go clean up as she would need to do the same after I was finished. The whole scenario was so homey and comfortable I could see us doing this for a very long time and I told her as much.

Amy became a bit flushed and asked me to explain to her what I had meant by that statement. I stopped and turned to her and replied, "Staying the night with you. You are very easy to be around."

She had looked at me so sweetly my heart completely melted and she pointed towards the hall once more and told me to go clean up. I couldn't resist, I returned to her side and gave her backside a playful smack, laughed a little with happiness, and proceeded to cross the room and head down the hall to her bathroom.

 **Slightly more than an hour later I pulled into my assigned parking spot on campus and we both left the car, eager to get to our respective offices and begin our day.** After a quick kiss goodbye, we went our separate ways with a promise to meet for lunch. When I reached the Kerchoff Laboratory building, which held both my lab and the MEG room, I first headed for the staff lounge to retrieve my mail, and a cup of coffee if any was available. There was no coffee brewing, but I did have some mail so I grabbed it from my slot and headed for my office/lab. Once there I nonchalantly opened a letter from President Siebert. It had most likely been a request for a charitable contribution to some local charity or another; staff received those on a regular basis, or another boring staff meeting announcement. But this one was not a request for money, far from it. My eyes grew wider and wider as I read further down the page. "Damn!" was all I could get out before I pulled my phone from my bag and called Sheldon.

His phone rang, but he didn't answer. I figured he may have met one of his friends on the way to his office and stopped to talk. If this was so, there was no telling when he would be free to answer a call. Before I could plot my next move, the phone in my own lab began to ring. That had struck me as weird, but I hurried to answer it.

 _Hello?_

 _Amy, this is Jerry from the MEG Room. I thought I'd give you a head's up. Someone sent Siebert a video of you and Dr. Cooper scanning yourselves while doing the deed. At least he says it's you. And my computer here is fried. What the hell went on?_

 _Jerry, I'm sorry about the computer. I'll cover the cost for a replacement. But answer me this; do you know who gave Siebert that video?_

 _Nope, and I'm not about to ask around, either. Just expect him to call you both on the carpet for your little indiscrete behavior._

 _Too late. I just got a formal letter asking me and Sheldon to visit his office at three o'clock to discuss the matter. We're screwed, aren't we?_

 _Relax, Amy. You and Sheldon were not the first couple to trip the light fantastic with electrodes on their heads. You were the first to fry the computer, though. I'd love to see that video!_

 _I'll pretend I didn't hear that. So, Jerry, now what do we do?_

 _Well, Amy, you come to my office asap. Not the MEG Room, my office. I have something I want to show you._

 _Should I bring Sheldon?_

 _Only if you can get ahold of him NOW. Time is of the essence here, girl._

 _I'll try his phone again and if he doesn't answer, I'll make it up to your office right away._

 _Good girl. I'll see you then._

I then tried to call Sheldon one more time and had no luck getting in touch with him. I sighed and realized that I had to go up to Jerry's office alone. I hadn't known what he wanted to show me, but it sounded very important. So, I grabbed my bag and made my way over to the elevator and quickly pushed the button for the fifth floor.

 **After I had kissed Amy goodbye and made arrangements to meet her for lunch in the cafeteria, I headed straight for my office in the Bridge Physics Building. I had a lot of work to make up after not working on Friday.** On my way there, however, I happened to run into Leonard and he began to explain to me a problem he was having setting the correct parameters for a black body he was going to be implementing in a laser light experiment he was setting up. I became extremely intrigued by this and followed him to his lab were we worked together to determine the exact dimensions that would be required for the black body to do its work. When that had been accompolished, I headed straight for my office only to be waylaid by Howard Wollowitz, who approached me with a snarky grin on his face.

"Hey, Sheldon. I hear Siebert wants to see you and Amy in his office later today."

I had been truly perplexed at that and asked him, "Whatever for? I have given money to the last three charities to which he has hit me up for donations. Do you have any idea what he wants?"

Howard began to laugh and gave me a punch in the arm, "Something to do with a fried computer and a video that was given him of a certain couple enjoying themselves doing the nasty in the MEG Room."

At that point in time I had wanted the earth to open up and swallow me. I then tried to appear nonchalant, but failed as I gasped, "Oh dear lord! How did he get that video?"

Howard gave me a conspiratorial grin and replied, "More important, how did you guys do that with all those wires on your heads?"

My eyes narrowed as he had been enjoying this a bit too much. I gave him my best imitation of a menacing look and demanded, "You wouldn't know how that video got into Siebert's hands, would you Howard?"

He shook his head without any seeming stress or angst and replied, "No, but I'd sure love to me a copy of that thing."

I then looked quickly around us and whispered to him, "Has anyone but Siebert seen it?"

Howard gave a maddening chuckle and told me, "I don't think so, but don't count on that being the case much longer. All the science departments know about it, though. You're getting the reputation as quite the stud, Sheldon."

I then buried my head in my hands and lamented, "Oh God! How will I ever live this down?"

Howard shook his head and shot me a look of disbelief, "Why would you want to? By the end of the day you're going to have every female in the building hot for you."

I had not been amused by that and informed him, "This may surprise you, Wolowitz, but I take no delight in having the reputation of a sexual lothario. Amy is my woman and she is the only woman I want to destroy computers with."

He then began to laugh even harder, "Then it _was_ you. Bernie's gonna get a big kick out of this! I can't wait to tell her. Hey, I gotta go. See you at lunch, Lover Boy." With that, Howard headed towards his office and I beat a hasty retreat to mine. As I closed the door behind me, my phone rang in my pocket and I answered it. It was Amy. Our conversation had gone something like this:

 _Sheldon, have you heard about Siebert seeing that video of us?_

 _The one where we fornicated on university property? Yes. Howard Wolowitz gleefully informed me of the situation a short time ago. I do believe he mentioned something about Siebert requesting our presence in his office later?_

 _Look, Sheldon. This isn't as bad as it sounds. Just meet me outside of Siebert's office at three o'clock._

 _Not as bad as it sounds? Woman, have you completely lost your mind? Siebert has viewed that video. I believe our reputations as serious scientists have been ruined._

 _Relax, Sheldon. I've got this handled. Everything's going to be fine. Just follow my lead when we get in Siebert's office._

 _Amy, could you kindly tell me just what is going on?_

 _Not yet. Just trust me. Okay?_

 _I suppose I must. Are you sure you know what you're doing?_

 _Positive. This may even be a bit fun. Now, relax and meet me outside of his office. I'll give you a small clue then._

 _I doubt I have any choice but to follow your directives, but I'm still a bit worried._

 _Don't be. And Sheldon?_

 _Yes?_

 _I love you._

 _I return the sentiment. Now I suppose I should get back to work. Oh, Amy?_

 _Yes?_

 _This just occurred to me. How are we going to face everyone at lunch?_

 _Like the two sexual pyromaniacs that we are. Seriously, Sheldon, let's just act in a normal manner. For all anyone else knows, it was just innuendo._

 _I suppose that is our only choice. All right, Amy. I'll see you at lunch. I'll meet you at your lab at noon._

 _Perfect. Now go get some work done and I will do the same._

 _Very well. Good day, Amy Farrah Fowler._

 _Good day, Sheldon Cooper._

 **What does Amy know and what is her plan? More importantly, how will they get away with this? Just know this, Amy is one smart cookie.**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21: Confrontation

This chapter is written a tad differently. It contains only two parts. The meeting with Siebert, which is told by Amy, and the aftermath of that meeting, which is told from Sheldon's perspective.

 **Sheldon met me outside of Siebert's office at precisely three o'clock. I had to give the guy credit, he was punctual as hell.** Lunch had gone fairly well. All of Sheldon's friends had treated us fairly normally, or at least as normally as the situation allowed. I had realized during that lunch break, that for all their teasing of Sheldon, they were really loyal friends and I began to warm up to all of them, especially Howard. I will get into the reasons for that shortly. Neither Sheldon nor I had eaten very much, Sheldon out of anxiety and me out anticipation of the coming events, although Leonard repeatedly asked if I wanted some of his desert. Even shy Rajesh had seemed to come out of his shell and did his best to reassure both of us that everything would be fine.

Now, on to Howard. As we were seated he had handed me a note with a name scribbled down on it. Below it, he had underlined, _Here's your rat fink!_ At that time the name meant nothing to me, but Howard had told me to not reveal this name to Sheldon until after our meeting with Siebert. He also told me that he, Leonard, and Raj would take care of this guy. I had thanked him profusely and realized then that much of what came out of Howard's mouth was not to be taken seriously. He said certain things in an attempt to look 'cool' and fit in. Goodness knows we had all had moments when we had embarrassed ourselves doing exactly that, so I decided that Howard Wolowitz was a good man, if a little warped.

Anyway, back to our meeting with Siebert. As I said, Sheldon met me outside of Siebert's office and immediately grabbed my hand. "How much trouble do you think we are in, Amy?" he had asked me in an unsteady voice.

I had attempted to reassure him by saying, "Not much, I'll tell you that much. I know things you do not, so let me do most of the talking."

His face had shown a great deal of concern as he asked me, "What things do you know? Don't you think you ought to tell me?"

"Not yet. I will, trust me. For right now, just follow my lead. Don't go in there with a guilty look on your face; there is no reason for that. We did nothing that many others have done before us. We just got caught, is all." The last thing I wanted to do was get Sheldon wound up. That would ruin everything. I knew I possessed the cooler head, so I wanted to remain in charge.

He then pouted like a petulant child and replied, "If you say so. But at least let me know our defense."

I had hated to deny him this knowledge, but it had been best he didn't know. So, I replied, "No, Sheldon. Like I said, follow my lead and this will all work out in our favor."

I then proceeded to knock on the office door and a voice I recognized as Dr. Siebert's secretary called out, "Come in."

We had entered the lobby and both took a seat. Sheldon began to look around nervously and I shot him a look that stopped all of that immediately. At that moment I do believe he was more afraid of me than Siebert. In that situation, his fear had been good as It played into my hands perfectly. As I had all the ammunition, I wanted to be the one to lock, load, and fire that weapon.

Eventually, Siebert had poked his head out of his door and announce maliciously, "I will see the two of you now."

I stood up and smiled at him warmly, "Very good. I've been looking forward to speaking with you on this matter."

He had looked a bit confused, but held the door open and Sheldon and I waltzed in and took two seats without being asked. He did very well at following my lead and that was going to be a big help to us.

Siebert had taken his seat behind his desk and attempted to stare us down. I had just grinned at him and stated, "Well, shall we begin?"

Siebert cleared his throat and nervously began to speak, "Of course. I suppose you have been informed that I have seen that video of your little, shall we say, rendezvous?"

I remember I looked straight at him and replied, "I wouldn't call it little. It went on for quite some time if my memory hasn't failed me."

I had seen Siebert's impatience and frustration showing as he asked me, "You feel no shame over this incident, Dr. Fowler?

I merely shrugged and answered him, "Why should I? We're not the first couple who has tried on the MEG helmet and electrodes while engaging in coitus." Sheldon had nodded in agreement.

Siebert noticed that and asked, "What do you have to say to that, Dr. Cooper?"

Sheldon had followed my lead perfectly and responded, "I have to agree with Dr. Fowler. It did go on for quite some time. So you see, little is not the proper word to use in this situation."

I had experienced great difficulty keeping a straight face as I added, "Plus, if you had noticed the size of Sheldon's…"

At that, Siebert's face had turned beet red and he had almost leapt from his seat behind the desk, "That will be enough, both of you! I am here to tell you there is no place at this institution for such antics. It was totally disgraceful for two scientists of your caliber to be engaging in what could be termed a juvenile frat house caper."

At that point, things had been going according to my plan. So I continued with, "You say there is no place for that at this university? Then why have so many people done the same thing as Sheldon and me? And why were they not punished or at least called into your office as we were?"

"I was given no video proof of their transgression, Dr. Fowler. If I had been, they would have received the same notice as you and Dr. Cooper." I swear, the man had almost been frothing at the mouth.

I had done my best to look contrite and in a chagrined voice I replied, "I see. And just how do you think you will go about punishing us? I have already informed Jerry Tanaka that we will replace any and all equipment that was damaged."

Siebert had sat back down after hearing that and went on to say in voice filled with faux regret, "That is all well and good, but I still must inform you that as of tomorrow morning, the both of you will not longer be employed at this university. Have I made myself clear?"

I had nodded. It was almost time to spring the trap. All I had to say next was, "Very clear. You say our antics warranted the termination of our employment?"

His voice had sounded almost sad as he informed us, "I have no choice. You have both violated the morals clause in your contracts, and used school property to do so. I'm very sorry."

I then baited my trap, "If you were shown a video of someone else committing the same transgression as me and Dr. Cooper would you be forced to terminate them, also?"

Siebert had nodded smugly and replied, "Of course. This is not a personal matter. It is one of ethics. If I had proof another couple had done the same thing, their jobs would also be terminated."

I then pulled my laptop out from under my seat and fired it up. I looked directly as Siebert and smiled, "This file will take just a minute for me to open. I'm sure this video will be of great interest to you."

I had loved the confusion on Siebert's face that soon turned to panic as he realized just which video had been downloaded onto my laptop. I had then motioned to Sheldon to come see what was playing on my computer screen and a look of both horror and vindication crossed his face at the same time.

I turned the laptop to face Siebert, "As you can see, Sheldon and I were not the only ones to engage in S-E-X while using the M-E-G." Together we had all watched the grainy video of Dr. Siebert engaging in any manner of sexual positions with an unrecognizable partner while wearing the MEG paraphernalia.

Siebert finally managed to croak, "Okay. What do you say none of us ever saw this video or the one with you two doing your thing."

This time it was Sheldon who answered him, "Agreed. But I have a question I need to ask you, sir."

A stubborn look had come over his face and Siebert shook his head, "Forget it, Cooper. I will never divulge the name of my partner in this lamentable event."

Sheldon had looked confused and then responded with, "First, I was not going to ask you who the lady in the video was, that is your own, private business. Second, why is that lamentable? I certainly do not lament having spent the afternoon with Dr. Fowler in that fashion."

Siebert put his head on his desk and waved us off with his hand, "Cooper, could you and Dr. Fowler just leave please?"

Sheldon crossed his arms on his chest and took a stubborn stance, "Not until we have settled a couple of things."

Siebert's head had come off of his desk by then and he asked in a weary voice, "Which would be?"

Now it had been Sheldon's turn to look smug, "First, I will draw up a contract in which Amy and I promise to never share this video of your dalliance with anyone at any time. Second, I would like the name of the person who gave you the video of us."

Siebert had brightened a bit at that. I do believe he had been expecting something much, much, worse. He then stood up, nodded and reached for Sheldon's hand to shake it, "I think that contract is an excellent idea, Cooper. Include in it that I will never share the video of you two, either." I don't mind telling you, at that I had breathed a sigh of relief.

Sheldon had taken the offered hand and had shaken it solemnly with saying, "Very well."

Siebert hastily added, "Wait, I'm not done. I refuse to name the person who gave me the video. I have to protect them, as well."

Sheldon had thought for a moment and then replied in a resigned voice, "If that's the way you want it, so be it. Are you sure there is nothing I can do to change your mind?" I had been surprised at how civilly they were both acting.

Siebert's face had looked tired, but resolute as he responded, "Nothing, Dr. Cooper. Now, bring that contract to my office tomorrow morning and all three of us will sign it. Agreed?"

Sheldon had merely shrugged and turned to leave, "Agreed. Come Amy. I do believe it is time for us to go back to work."

So, I put my arm through Sheldon's and we left Siebert's office together. After a quick kiss at parting and a promise to Skype later in the evening, we parted ways and I returned to my office. All in all, it had been a most productive day. There was just one little detail I have omitted. It had to do with how Siebert had gotten our video.

 **As Amy and I were leaving Siebert's office, I turned to her and demanded, "Alright Amy, you look like you know something I don't. I feel compelled to ask you, what is it?"**

Amy sighed and gently scolded me, "Do I have to tell you, Sheldon? Isn't it enough that we have kept our jobs and avoided getting into any real trouble?"

"Yes, I suppose we could look at it that way, but someone gave that video to Siebert with the intent of costing us our jobs. If I have an enemy of that caliber here on campus I would like to know who it is. As they say, praemonitus, pramunitus."

At that point she merely sighed and told me, "Sheldon, there is no need to be forewarned or forearmed. Whatever their intention was in giving Siebert the video, we foiled their plan. Now relax."

At that ridiculous proclamation, I had turned to her, my eyes wide with consternation, and asked, "How can I relax when there is someone at this university who would love nothing more than to sabotage my career?"

I could tell she had tried to be patient with me as she responded, "You can relax because as of now, there is nothing they can do to hurt you."

I know I had sounded a bit paranoid, but I couldn't help but ask, "How can you be so sure they don't have anything else up their sleeve?"

Amy let out a long sigh and responded to that by taking my arm and saying, "I can't be sure of that, but will worrying about it solve anything? Now, let's talk about something more important, like us."

I was completely stumped by that remark, "What about us?"

"When do you want to get together again?"

I had answered her truthfully, "As long as it's not in the MEG Room, I'm quite open to any date you might have in mind."

Amy had nodded at that and referred back to one of our earlier conversations as she released my arm, turned to me and asked, "Did we not agree on Fridays and Saturdays, with the alternate Tuesday thrown in?"

I distinctly remember being impressed with her memory and affirmed her statement with, "Yes. So seeing as how today is Monday, I suppose I will be spending time with you after work tomorrow?"

"Yes. If I'm not mistaken, wasn't that in the Relationship Agreement?"

This little lady's memory was almost as good as mine. I nodded and said, "It was. So I will ride home with you tomorrow night and we will spend the night at your apartment."

She began to enter our date on her phone and replied, "Yes, Sheldon. I will look forward to it. Perhaps we could order some dinner and have it delivered."

"Thai?" I had asked her hopefully.

She had answered me without looking up, "If that pleases you, of course we can have that."

I had softly confessed to her, "I will miss you tonight, Amy."

Her eyes finally left her phone and she smiled at me and suggested, "Well, we could always Skype."

At that, my mood had brightened considerably, "We could. Does eight o'clock sound like a good time for you?"

"Perfect. Now I must leave you and return to work. So I will leave you here. I will speak with you later tonight, Sheldon."

I put my hand on her shoulder gently to stop her, "One more thing, Amy. Are you resolute in your decision to not tell me the name of our snitch?"

Amy had said nothing, but gave my hand a firm squeeze and replied, "I've given you all the information you need to know." She then kissed me quickly and we reiterated the time we were going to Skype later in the evening. As I walked down the hall towards my office I felt something odd in the palm of my hand. I opened my fist and looked down at a small post it note stuck there. I then brought it up closer to my face and read the name written there in black ink: Barry Kripke.

 **Now this is starting to get interesting, indeed. What do you think Sheldon's response will be to thi** s?


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22: Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold

The fellas plot their revenge and Amy and Penny have dinner. It looks like everyone's moving on from the MEG debacle, or are they?

 **I viewed the name in my palm and a blinding rage came over me.** However, logic and common sense soon returned and I realized that acting Chapter impulsively was not in my best interest. I was making my way back to my office when I ran into Leonard, who was approaching me rapidly from the opposite direction.

"Sheldon, we're having an emergency meeting in my lab. You've got to come with me." When I hadn't immediately followed him he grabbed 22me by the arm and said, "C'mon. We need to deal with this situation right now!"

I then decided to update him on the situation and replied, "Leonard, Amy and I have already seen Siebert. Everything has been settled quite nicely. Amy and I are no trouble with the school, whatsoever."

Leonard then shook his head and made a dismissive motion with his hand, "This isn't about that. This is about," he turned his head and looked around to make sure we were not being overheard, "Barry Kripke."

I stopped in my tracks and made a disgusted face, "If you don't mind, I would rather not discuss the man."

Leonard grabbed my arm once more and tugged at it, eager to get me moving in the same direction he was heading, "Sheldon, we're not going to be discussing him, we're going to discuss our plan for revenge."

I followed for a bit and then stopped and asked him, "Does Amy know anything about this?"

Leonard had sighed with impatience and responded with, "She knows we will be putting our heads together and making him pay, but she doesn't know how we will do it, no."

I thought hard for a moment until my curiosity got the better of me and I replied, "Very well. I suppose some form of retribution is in order. But of what kind or variety?"

A huge grin suddenly appeared on Leonard's face and he said, "Let me run this idea by you really quickly. Who among our group has the most twisted and perverse mind?"

I hadn't had to think longer than a second before answering, "Wolowitz, of course. Really, Leonard, that was too easy."

"Yeah, well Howard has come up with a plan and we'd like you to hear it."

I was now intrigued and inquired, "Will it cause Barry great humiliation and angst?"

"Oh yeah."

I nodded and then took off down the hall, calling back to Leonard over my shoulder, "Then count me in. Let's go. We have a meeting to attend to."

Once in Leonard's office, Howard, Raj, Leonard, and yours truly, had set to work expanding on Howard's insidious plot to get me some payback.

Howard had been the first to speak, "Sheldon, outside of science, what is Barry's main focus in life?

That had been too easy, "Getting women to have coitus with him. Or sticking his nose too deeply into the sex lives of others and getting some sort of twisted pleasure from that intrusion."

He nodded in agreement, "That's right. So, we play to that when we hatch this plot."

I distinctly remember an intense curiosity burning in my mind and then me asking him, "That makes perfect sense, Wolowitz, so what's your plan?"

Howard handed me a manila folder containing three pages of text and two eight by ten glossies of the catalyst for my revenge. It was a cruel idea. Definitely not politically correct, and many would find it offensive. It was exactly like Kripke! An evil smile had appeared on my face as I asked him, "Just when do we put this plan of yours into action?"

Leonard had spoken up and asked me, "I take it you approve of this?"

I gave a little chuckle and answered him, "Leonard, it's sexist, twisted, and socially unacceptable. It's perfect for Barry. It contains most of the more negative facets of his personality. What more could I ask for?"

Raj added, "What you say is true, Sheldon, but let's take our time about this. We don't need him getting suspicious with it closely following what he did to you. So let's sit on this awhile and then spring our trap!"

At his wise words, I had nodded and responded with, "You're right, of course, Koothrappali. Revenge is a dish best served cold."

Howard gave a hearty laugh and stated, "And what a revenge it will be! It will be hard to wait, but we've got to be smart about this. He then took a look once more at the manila folder holding the details and began to speak, "Leonard, you and I will begin to set up the equipment in Barry's office in a couple of weeks. Raj, as soon as we have a definite date you get in touch with your friend and go over the script. Got it?"

Raj, who was, and still is, a man of few words, simply nodded and said, "Got it."

I had been feeling a bit left out so I asked him, "And what do I do?"

"Sheldon, you've got the toughest job of all. You've got to be patient and go about your normal life, as normal as that can be, and wait."

Leonard made a most helpful suggestion at that point, "Hey, buddy, maybe Amy can help you pass the time."

With that pronouncement, I had suddenly remembered my plans with Amy for the next evening and informed my roommate, "Leonard, thank you for reminding me. I will not be home tomorrow night. I will be spending the night at Amy's apartment."

Howard gave me a lecherous wink and asked, "Gonna work on getting a little, huh?"

I had made a strong effort to inject some levity by responding, "No, Howard. I am going to work on getting a lot!"

At that, we all broke up laughing and soon left for our respective work centers. Howard had been correct about me having the most difficult assignment. It would be pure hell to go on acting like nothing had happened and that all was copacetic. But, this plan was worth doing just that and I did have the lovely Amy Farrah Fowler to help me through it.

 **After Sheldon and I had parted I had headed back to my lab. I hoped the guys would come up with a good plan for revenge on Kripke.** I didn't know the man personally, but Howard and Raj had filled me in on just what a low life he was and how he often targeted Sheldon for his mean and humiliating pranks. As far as I was concerned, that was evil incarnate. Some people view this sort of activity as harmless teasing, but when you had been bullied all the way through your school years you see that sort of behavior for what it is, soul destroying aggression. I had wanted to be a part of Howard's plan, but I knew this was better off left in the hands of Sheldon and his friends. Dr. Kripke had never meant to target me, personally. As far as he was concerned, I could have been any female in the world. No, his target had definitely been Sheldon and I knew the revenge should be his as well.

I had let myself into my lab and began to work. I had been investigating sudden withdrawals of several well known anti-anxiety medications in monkeys in an effort to discover a safer way to wean their human counterparts off such drugs. I was enjoying this assignment as it was a fascinating study that caused no long term harm to my subjects. Past a certain point of negative reaction, the drugs were slowly reintroduced and I then tried a different track of drug withdrawal. The point was not to cause death or great discomfort, the point was to eventually come up with better withdrawal plans that did not harm the subjects. I loved my job when I could see the help it would bring to my fellow human beings without leading to extreme discomfort or the demise of my test subjects.

Anyway, I had spent the rest of the afternoon recording the physical and mental states of my monkeys. Somewhere around four o'clock (I do not have Sheldon's eidetic memory so forgive me if I sometimes get fuzzy on the details) my phone rang. I hurried over to my desk to answer it, thinking it might be Sheldon. It wasn't. It was Penny and our conversation had gone like this:

 _Hey girl, it's me. I just heard that you and Sheldon made out pretty darn good today. I'm glad you're not in any big trouble._

 _Thanks, Penny. I owe a lot of that to my friend, Jerry Tanaka. He was only too happy to give me the link to that video of Siebert. You did hear about that, didn't you?_

 _Girl, I heard everything. I just got off the phone with Leonard and he told me all that happened. I swear, sometimes he's the biggest gossip._

 _As big a gossip as us girls?_

 _Well, no. But close. Anyway, I also heard about Kripke. What a douche!_

 _That's a good word for him, alright._

 _Has Sheldon filled you in on their plans for revenge?_

 _No. I haven't heard from Sheldon since we left Siebert's office._

 _Oh, it's going to be sweet._

 _I don't suppose you could fill me in on the most pertinent details?_

 _Not over the phone, girlfriend. You never know who could be listening in. I don't trust that place._

 _Got it. Well, I'm sure Sheldon will fill me in on what's going to go down sooner or later._

 _I've got an idea! Look, instead of waiting for Sheldon to tell you, why I don't come over to your place tonight and let you in on it._

 _But Leonard and Sheldon will see you leave. Won't they get suspicious?_

 _Here's where we're in luck. They're both going to the comic book store after work with Raj and Howard. That will give me at least a couple of hours to go to yours and get back home. I'll even leave a note that I went out to the store for a bit in case they beat me back home._

 _That sounds good, but why shouldn't I wait for Sheldon to tell me?_

 _One, he may not. He may be paranoid you'll blab to someone. Two, I think he wants to keep it among the guys. Thank god Leonard didn't share that feeling. Three, girl, this is good. Howard thought it up so you know they're going to be coloring outside the lines with this._

 _Okay, you've sold me. Say you get to my place at six thirty?_

 _Sure. It's my day off, so I can make that easy._

 _Great. I'll have some dinner and wine waiting._

 _Ames, I think you and I are going to be real good friends. See you then._

 _Okay. Goodbye, Penny._

 _'Bye, Amy._

At a little after six thirty (it seemed Penny did not share Sheldon's penchant for punctuality) Penny had knocked on my door and then walked right in before I had a chance to answer her knock. Sheldon had told me about this habit of hers, so I was not too taken aback.

She had sniffed the air appreciatively and asked, "Hey, Ames. What's for dinner?"

I had been unable to help myself; I smiled at her happily and replied in a joking voice, "How does eggplant casserole sound?"

Penny had made a disgusted face and answered weakly, "Okay."

I had burst out laughing and told her, "Just kidding. I ordered Italian. You have your choice, veal parmesan or chicken marsala."

Penny had responded to that by pointing to one of the take out containers on the table, "I'll take the chicken, thanks. Now, what do you have for the wine?"

I then held up to bottles of vino and informed her, "You can choose either a nice chardonnay or a pinot noir. With the chicken, I'd take the chardonnay."

Penny had looked relieved that I had made that decision for her, "Okay, I'll take that one. "

After our meal, we shared some more wine and Penny filled me in on the guys' plans for one Barry Kripke. Yes, Howard had definitely colored outside the lines with this one and my eyes grew wider and wider as Penny unfolded the plot.

I had poured us both some more wine and told her, "It sounds both humiliating and twisted, which doesn't surprise me considering the source, but are they sure this will work?"

Penny had answered me while looking around my apartment with a curious look on her face, "From what Leonard told me, they're still ironing out the kinks, but they should be ready to do this within the next month or so."

I had absently replied, "Amazing what these guys can come up with when they put their minds together."

Penny finally focused her attention back at me, "I'm sorry I was just checking out the historic apartment where Sheldon Cooper lost his V Card. Oh, Ames, you've got to promise me you won't tell a soul about Howard's plan. Leonard would kill me if he found out I told you any of this."

I had taken a sip of my wine and hastened to reassure her, "Relax, Penny. My lips are sealed."

She then gave the cutest giggle and asked me, "Good. Now, on to other important stuff. When do you want to go shopping at the mall with me and Bernie?"

I had stood up and gone back into the kitchen to retrieve a wine bottle and answered her on my way back, "Well, Sheldon and I have agreed to spend weekends together, but he is going to go play laser tag with Raj and Stuart on Sunday afternoon. So let's go then."

Penny had held out her wine glass for a refill, "Great. I'll check with Bernie, but I think Leonard is going over to Howard's place to watch some movies. So, Sunday sounds good. I'll talk with you before then and we'll set a time. That's enough, Ames, I still have to drive home. Now, remember, not a word to Sheldon about me being here, okay?"

I then noticed the clock on the wall and said, "No problem. Penny, I do believe you should get going. It is almost eight thirty and Sheldon said he would Skype with me at nine."

She then stood up and I noticed she was still steady on her feet and her voice was clear as she replied, "Yeah, I think I'd better go, too. Leonard and Sheldon should be home by nine and I don't want either of them to get suspicious if I'm not at my apartment. Leonard will check on me before he does anything, I just know it. So, I'll talk to you later, okay? I can't wait to do some damage to my credit card on Sunday. We'll all get some cute clothes and talk about guys."

At that, I got up from the couch and walked her over to the door, "Sounds good. I'll talk to you later. Now hurry, get home before Leonard and Sheldon." Wow. I could hardly believe it. I now had a boyfriend and some girlfriends and we were going to go to the mall and talk about guys together. I never could have envisioned that happening in my life a few short months ago. I went into the kitchen and began to load the dishwasher with a silly smile on my face.

 **Are you curious as to what this plan is that Howard cooked up? Keep reading. The trap will soon be set, and sprung.**


	23. Chapter 23: Baiting the Trap

Chapter 23: Baiting the Trap

The trap is being set and Penny gets her nose out of joint.

 **The next month passed fairly pleasantly.** Amy and I managed to enjoy many different weekend excursions during that time. Every Sunday we would head to another place that had held an interest for the both of us. We managed to visit the L.A. Zoo, Disneyland, The Aquarium of the Pacific, The Getty Center, and Universal Studios. According to our agreement, we spent every Friday and Saturday night together, as well as the alternate Tuesdays. As time went by, however, that changed to every Tuesday, which was readily amended in the Relationship Agreement.

Before we knew it, it had been one month since Amy and I had talked to Siebert and we had almost forgotten about Howard's little plan. I said almost because one Thursday at lunch, Howard reminded us that the time was almost upon us to implement what he had called, 'Project Payback'.

Howard had looked up from his salad and asked us, "Fellas, need I remind you what day it is?"

I remember being slightly peeved and answering him with, "It is Thursday. Really, Howard, not all of us function on your limited intellectual level."

Howard had merely given me an ironic grin as a reply and then added, "Very funny, Sheldon. No, today is the day we begin to put all the parts of our evil plan for Project Payback together."

Raj had put down his hamburger and replied, "I've already talked to my friend, and he's in. He just needs the details."

Howard had nodded and then returned to his salad after telling Raj, "He'll get them by the end of next week." After completing the evisceration of a cherry tomato, he asked, "Leonard, have you gotten all the equipment we'll need?"

I had been greatly surprised when Leonard had replied to that question in a rather offhand manner, "It's in the trunk of my car as we speak. Did you want me to store it in my lab or something?"

Wolowitz had finished his salad, shaken his head and told him, "We don't want anyone to be able to tie us to this, though everyone will more than likely know it was us behind the whole thing anyway. But evidence-wise, we've got to stay clean. So no, keep the stuff in your trunk."

I then decided that the time had come to ask the golden question, "Now, how to we get Kripke to fall into our trap?"

Howard had sampled the spaghetti before replying, "Sheldon, Kripke likes nothing better than to make inappropriate remarks to women in a usually futile attempt to get them to sleep with him. Kina like me before I met Bernadette. This plays right into our hands. Have you written the letter?"

I had responded in the affirmative, "I have. I used my laptop at home, not my work computer. I don't want it to be easy for him to trace its origins to me."

Wolowitz then finished his lunch, stood up and addressed us all, "Good job. Sheldon, you mail the letter to Kripke on Monday. Leonard, when he accepts and agrees to the meeting, we go into his office the night before and set everything up. Raj, make double sure with your friend regarding the date we're doing this." He then stared directly at me and stated, "If everything goes according to plan, this is going to be the greatest bazinga you have ever pulled."

 **Sheldon and I had spent the entire month after our little get together with Siebert honing and refining the details of our relationship.** We spent many hours together outside of work exploring new places and some of our old favorites. Sheldon had introduced me to the fascinating world of The Aquarium of the Pacific, where we compared our knowledge of all the aquatic creatures housed there. On one of our excursions there, I actually worked up the nerve to touch a bamboo shark! Why a woman who handled brains for a living would have been squeamish about touching a small shark is beyond me, but I was. Thanks to Sheldon, I was gradually coerced into running my hand down the length of one of these graceful creatures and reveling in the feel of it gracefully moving through the water. All in all, that had been a wonderful day.

It had been during our visit to the L.A. Zoo that Sheldon had made the suggestion that perhaps we could alter the paradigm of our relationship and change our overnight dates from every other Tuesday to every Tuesday. Sheldon had brought this up when we were standing in front of the vulture exhibit and he had informed me that black vultures mate for life. I had found that comment oddly romantic, but when he tied that in with increasing the frequency of our sleepovers, I have to admit, I had been more than receptive to that idea. Of course, we had done the appropriate revisions to our relationship agreement shortly after we had returned home.

One Friday, as Sheldon and I were sitting snuggled on the couch watching another one of the Indiana Jones movies, he suddenly grabbed the remote and paused Indie on the brink of, yet again, saving the day. He then turned to me in all earnestness and confessed, "Amy, there is something going on in my life I have been keeping secret from you."

My first thought was another woman, but I quickly dismissed that idea from my mind. Sheldon and I spent almost all of our free time together and the times we weren't in each other's company he was either at work, with his friends, or home with Leonard. Furthermore, I was keeping him way too busy in the bedroom for him to even have the energy to entertain another female in that fashion. Given these reasons, I truly was perplexed when I asked him, "You have? Don't you think you should tell me what it is?"

He had then shifted uneasily in his seat and sighed deeply, "Amy, I feel compelled to inform you that Howard, Leonard, Raj, and I have been working on a plan of revenge against Barry Kripke."

In response to that pronouncement, I had turned, looked him straight in the eyes and took one of his hands in mine, "Alright, I can understand desiring a little payback, but maybe you should not have kept this a secret from me. Besides, it has been close to a month and our lives are more than back on track. What would be the point of revenge at this date in time?"

Sheldon suddenly looked sadder than I had ever seen him look before. His entire face seemed to be racked with pain as he carefully explained to me, "Amy, if that incident had been the only occasion Kripke has attempted to humiliate me, I would agree with you. But this goes way back. Barry Kripke has made many efforts to both embarrass me and derail my career in the past, but this time, he went too far. This time he involved someone I care for deeply in his nefarious plan. You may neither understand nor approve of this, but my friends and I are going ahead with it anyway."

I then let go of his hand, then leaned over and softly kissed his cheek, "Very well. I can see my words will have no affect on your determination to set this plan in motion, and there's a tiny place in the back of my mind that is happy about that. So, would you care to fill me in on the details?"

The smile that had appeared on his face at my words made me fall in love with him all over again. He leaned forward and began to excitedly explain the plot to me, "But of course. Here's the plan…"

When Sheldon had finished relating the details of this scheme to me, I had only one response, a very wide grin and a heartfelt, "Before you undertake this plot, remember if you will, the fate that met Hamlet when he carried out his plan of revenge. Still, if you need any help with this payback, let me know. It is truly horrendous, yet at the same time, hilarious."

"That it is little lady, that it is."

 **On the appointed day, Barry Kripke found this letter in his work mail slot:**

Dear Dr. Kripke,

I am in the process of writing a book about the greatest scientific minds to have worked at Cal Tech. My research has narrowed the field of current scientists down to three prominent physicists, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, Dr. Sheldon Cooper, and you. You have always been my first choice due to your groundbreaking work on exotic nuclear decay modes. If you would like, we can meet at your office and discuss any concerns or questions you may have.

I can be most easily reached by text. My phone #is: 888 555-0100.

Sincerely,

Dr. Lee Sylvar, PhD

 **Through the grapevine I had heard that Kripke had wasted no time in texting Dr. Sylvar an answer agreeing to be interviewed for the book.** He also wasted no time in letting both Sheldon and Leonard know that he had been chosen over them to be in this work. They both had a very difficult time keeping a straight face while Kripke gloated and preened in front of them. I know this for sure because both Sheldon and Leonard told me as much when we met for dinner one night. I knew that my lover was enjoying every minute of this because in the weeks before the trap was sprung I had been awakened several times in the middle of the night by Sheldon chuckling loudly in his sleep.

 **The next Thursday, Raj had come to the lunch table in a very excited mood and informed us,** "Dudes, Kripke took the bait. Lee is meeting with him next Wednesday morning to be 'interviewed' for this book. Leonard, Howard, you know what you will be doing Tuesday night, don't you?"

They had both sighed and Leonard replied, "Yes, Raj. We will be installing all the needed equipment in Kripke's office. Penny's going to love this. I promised to take her to the movies that night."

Howard had made a vain attempt at waylaying his fears, "Hey, she'll understand. I'm sure she's pulled a practical joke or two in her day."

Leonard had looked defeated and replied, "I'm sure of that, too. But she hates it when I cancel dates."

At that point I decided it was time for Cooper to the Rescue, so I had offered my assistance with that problem, "Don't be concerned, Leonard. Amy and I can invite her over to have dinner and a movie with us."

Leonard responded to my offer of help with a question, "I don't mean to be unappreciative, Sheldon, but what movie do you and Amy enjoy that Penny would be even remotely interested in seeing?"

My answer to that had been both quick and a stroke of genius, "Oh ye of little faith. Amy and I have chosen a Planet of the Apes marathon. Everyone loves that series."

Instead of a smile of relief, Leonard had shaken his head sadly and explained, "Except a woman who starred in a movie called Serial Apeist. Your choice might not be the best."

When he said that I had understood his point of view completely and asked him, "Very well. What would you suggest then?"

Raj had piped up, "Anything with either Brad Pitt or Johnny Dep."

The light bulb suddenly went on in my head and I had volunteered, "Oh, we can watch the Pirates of the Caribbean! Penny should enjoy that."

In response to that, Leonard gave me a kind look and nodded his head, "Okay, if she gets upset I'll send her to Amy's place. Now, Howard, do you have all the tools?"

Wolowitz had grinned and winked, "We're set for tools. You have all the audio/visual equipment, right, Leonard?"

He had grinned back at Howard and said, "It's still sitting in my trunk as we speak. This is going to be good."

A worrisome thought had suddenly entered my mind and I felt compelled to ask, "Gentlemen, are you sure we will not get into trouble for this little prank we are about to pull?"

This time it was Raj who responded. He reassured me with, "No one will know it was us. Besides, all Lee is going to do is try to interview Kripke. The dude will find a way to cross so many sexual harassment boundaries with this I don't think we'll have to worry about what we have planned."

I had agreed with him wholeheartedly after that and had looked around the table at my friends and declared, "Alright, gentlemen. Let us proceed with Project Payback!"

Howard gave an evil laugh, "This is going to be one of my best tricks, ever!

Leonard nodded his head and gave Howard a fist bump, "Yeah, Howard. If everything goes like we've planned, revenge will be yours, Sheldon. Or ours. I'll never forgive Barry for coming on to my mother. That was just plain creepy."

I had added to that with, "Not to mention age inappropriate." I had looked down at my watch and informed them, "I see our lunch hour is over. I must return to work now. Leonard, I will see you later. Raj, tell your friend thank you. Howard, thank you for your ideas, they are truly the work of a twisted mind." After having said that, I had set off for my office, eager to finish the day and be one step closer to getting even with Kripke.

 **The night before the Big Day, Sheldon and I had found ourselves sitting on the couch at my apartment, watching Pirates of the Caribbean with Penny.** I was doing my best to put a smile on her face, but it seems she had been dead set on being angry.

I had made the decision to try to inject some levity into the situation by saying, "Who would have thought that Howard Wolowitz would be going out of his way to do something for Sheldon. Maybe pigs really do fly."

In response, Penny had glared at me and responded to my attempt at witticism by saying, "Nice try, Amy. But I'm still mad at Leonard."

Sheldon had regrettably felt the urge to annoy her further, "Why should you be angry at him for spending time with a friend?"

Penny's eyes had lit up as she then laced into him, "He's spending time with a friend helping him install devices in someone's office to help YOU get some revenge. I think that's just one of those stupid, macho things men do. Can't let anything go, OH NO. THAT would make me less of a man."

I had had about enough and I called her on it, "Penny, please stop this nonsense. Kripke tried to destroy Sheldon's professional reputation, as well as mine. This is NOT a simple case of macho payback. Kripke and Sheldon don't like each other and because Howard and Leonard are busy at this moment arranging Kripke's moment of humiliation, I would say they aren't particularly fond of him, either."

Penny did not look at all pleased and her retort was severe, "Oh, so now all I speak is nonsense. Well thank you for that, Amy. Here I was, thinking we were friends, but now I know the truth. You're just hanging around me so that you can feel good about yourself."

That one had thrown me and I had to ask her, "Excuse me? Would you care to expound on that?"

Her face had turned beet red and she had angrily replied, "Ex…what? There you go again; using words I don't understand just to make me feel stupid."

I had never seen her that upset, so I had made an effort to placate her, "Penny, I speak that way with everyone. I have not singled you out by any means."

At that point, Sheldon made another, most unwelcome suggestion to Penny, "May I suggest picking up a thesaurus? They're sold everywhere."

I decided to be the peacemaker and I then addressed them both, "Sheldon, that's not helping. Penny, your problem isn't with either me or Sheldon. What is really bothering you?"

Penny then got up from the couch and began to pace back and forth along the length of the living room, "Leonard and I had bought tickets for this movie weeks ago. We had reservations at a great Italian restaurant and were planning to have a wonderful date night. Then, all this silliness about Barry Kripke started and now I'm sitting here with you two watching a movie I have seen many times and having to listen to Sheldon talk through the whole thing. And you asked me why I'm mad?"

I could feel her angst and I had begun to understand where she was coming from. I then decided to mend the fences by saying, "I'm sorry your evening was ruined. I would be quite upset as well if I were in your shoes. But that doesn't mean you have to take it out on me and Sheldon. We offered to have you over so you wouldn't be sitting at home, alone with your thoughts. Maybe we were wrong. As far as Sheldon's talking through the movie, you learn to tune him out after a while."

Sheldon's voice rose to a very high pitch and he gave me a look that would melt chrome off a bumper hitch, "Excuse me? You learned to tune me out?"

I had nodded and replied to him in as calm a manner as possible, "Yes, Sheldon. Sometimes your intrusive voiceovers can be a tad annoying. I'm with Penny on that one."

He then stood up, his body ramrod straight, anger clearly visible on his face, "Is that so? Well maybe you two would like to watch this movie without me."

I realized I had gone too far and made an attempt to apologize to him, "Sheldon, I didn't mean it like that."

Penny's eyes had narrowed and she told him, "I don't know, it sounds like she really did."

Sheldon walked over to Penny and pulled her towards the door, "I agree. Penny, could I request a ride home from you?"

She nodded and gave me an evil look, "Sure. I was planning on leaving, anyway. I know when I'm not wanted."

I looked at both of them in shock and asked, "Don't you two think you're over reacting a bit?"

Penny resolutely shook her head and headed out the door, "No. Come on, Sheldon. Let's go home. Amy, enjoy the rest of your evening."

Sheldon had called back over his shoulder, "What she said goes for me as well. Good evening, Amy Farrah Fowler."

After they had left, I had sat there open-mouthed, wondering how everything had gone so wrong, so quickly. I had eventually decided there was nothing I could do at the moment to set things right, so I paused the movie, got up and made some microwave popcorn, and finished watching Johnny Depp being the sexiest pirate on the Seven Seas. I was positive that, given enough time, Penny and Sheldon would both realize how childish they had been. Wouldn't they? I made up my mind not to worry about them, it was too depressing. When the movie had finished, as a diversion, I turned off the television and began to wonder just what Leonard and Howard were up to at that moment.

 **What are Leonard and Howard up to? Read on and watch Kripke get the surprise of his life!**


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24: Bazinga!

 **This chapter will be slightly different. While this story up to this point has been told as a flashback from either Amy or Sheldon's point-of-view, for this chapter only it will told from the perspective of other characters in the story. It will also be told as it happened, in present tense. This is mainly because neither of our principal characters was present when everything went down. Enjoy.**

As Amy sat in her living room pondering what Leonard and Howard were up to, the aforementioned friends were inching through the crawlspace above Barry Kripke's office, laying audio and visual wires and cables around the perimeter of the room.

Howard heard Leonard swearing under his breath and whispered to him, "Careful. You don't want to hook the wrong wires together. That could be a big mistake."

His friend looked up from what he was doing and shot back in the same whispered voice, "Howard, can you trust me just this once? I know I'm not an engineer, but I do know how to wire an audio system. Who do you think did the surround sound in my living room? It sure wasn't Sheldon."

Howard sighed and continued, "I'm not worried about the wire hookups so much as I am of you falling through the ceiling. Twice already you've almost landed on Kripke's desk."

"Hey, it's dark up here."

Howard once again turned to Leonard and reminded him, "I told you to put on your night vision goggles."

Leonard put down his tools and snapped back, "And I told you they don't fit over my glasses."

Howard chuckled softly and joked, "So you're pretty much blind either way."

"Yeah, pretty much."

Howard muttered to himself something that Leonard actually overheard, "Maybe I should have brought Sheldon along, instead."

"That's easy enough to arrange. I'll give him a call right now." Leonard searched through his pockets and finally pulled out his phone.

Howard was instantly contrite and replied, "Stop, Leonard. I was only kidding. The last thing I need is to be trapped up here for two hours with the alpha nerd and his never ending stream of boring trivia facts and whining."

Leonard put away his phone and returned to connecting the audio wires, then suddenly stopped and said, "Almost done, wait, I need my inhaler." Leonard pulled the inhaler from his pocket, used it, and replaced it in his jacket while commenting to no one in particular, "There, that's better. There's a lot of dust up here."

Howard pulled out his own phone, looked at it briefly, and put his finger to his lips, "Leonard, quiet. According to the timetable I downloaded to my phone, the night security office should be making his way down this corridor on his hourly swing-by. Let's just sit here and chill for a couple of minutes. We don't need any overhead noises grabbing his attention."

Two minutes passed and then they both heard the night watchman's footsteps fade away.

Before he returned to his wiring task, Leonard had a question for his partner in crime, "Okay, Howard. Explain to me again why we have to wire the entire room from up here?"

"We want to make sure we capture the coup de grace perfectly, and we don't know where in the room it will go down. This way, no matter where they are, we will hopefully get both a clear picture and perfect sound. Besides, if we had just hidden the camera and microphones behind something in his office, Barry most likely would have found them. He's pulled so many of these things on people he knows what to look for. No, it's better this way."

Leonard shook his head and commented, "This seems is like a lot of work just to pull a prank on someone, even someone as twisted as Kripke."

Howard proudly proclaimed, "This is not just a prank, this is the mother of all pranks. Now, get busy with that wiring."

Leonard adjusted his glasses and looked over angrily at Howard, "Hey, who died and made you King Turd of Shit Mountain?"

"Leonard, I'm the one who came up with the plan. I'm also the one who bought all the materials and drew up the schematic we're following. Also, I'm the only person here who knows how to synchronize audio and visual feeds from six different angles. So, you can call me Your Highness."

Leonard threw down his tools, and began to make his way back towards Sheldon's office, where they had entered the crawlspace through the removal of a ceiling tile, "Okay, I've had it. I'm out of here. You can finish this by yourself, Your Highness."

Howard never looked up and continued with his work, "Fine. Take your tools and leave. I don't need a blind man as a sidekick to do this."

Leonard turned to Howard and angrily whispered, "You know, you're pretty much an asshole sometimes."

Howard never looked up from the wires he was connecting, "And you can be a complete wus sometimes, like now."

"Wus? Are you calling me a wus?"

Howard turned to face Leonard and nodded, "Yeah, If the shoe fits. The whole way over here you were going on about how upset Penny was. So what if she's upset? She'll get over it. And if she doesn't, well then she wasn't the right one for you."

Leonard frowned and attempted to defend his actions, "Hey, I love her."

Howard looked again at his friend and responded in deadpan voice, "Yeah, and that love is turning you into a wus."

"You don't love Bernie?" Leonard asked him as he collected his tools in preparation of leaving.

"Sure I do. But I happen to wear the pants in my relationship."

Leonard stopped suddenly and challenged Howard, "Oh yeah? What did she have to say about you doing this tonight?"

Howard gave a wicked smile as he answered Leonard's question, "She got this weird gleam in her eye and told me to make sure I set aside a copy of the video for her."

Leonard stopped his packing and asked his friend in a concerned voice, "Howard, don't you think that's a little twisted?"

"That's my girl!"

Leonard returned to the packing of his tools, "I've had enough of this. I'm out of here."

"'Bye wus. Give my regards to the holder of the whip." Howard looked over at his friend in an effort to gauge his reaction.

"I give up. I am not whipped. Have fun doing this on your own."

"Hey, I'll be fine. I'm almost done." Howard then made the sound of a whip cracking.

"That's it. Goodbye Howard. Give my love to your mother when you get home."

Howard responded with, "Smartass." Leonard never heard him, by that time he was well on his way back to the air vent above Sheldon's office.

Howard didn't seem to care as he continued working and laughed to himself, "This is going to be soooo good!"

The next day, Barry Kripke was pacing his office. Excited, nervous, and worried all at the same time. What if this Lee Sylvar got there and decided he wasn't impressed? What if his rhotacism turned the guy off? He had told everyone on campus about this meeting and that he was going to have an important chapter in this guy's book written about him. Barry could see it now, book signings, and talk shows, maybe even a pay raise and a promotion. Oh, wouldn't he love to lord that over that pain in the ass Cooper. Him and his stupid condescension. Fuck him! Mr. Lee Sylvar had chosen him, Barry Kripke, to be one of the subjects of his book over both Sheldon Cooper and that little toady of his, Leonard Hofstadter. God, he couldn't wait to rub their noses in this one!

Barry checked his watch for the tenth time. It said one-forty p.m., and Sylvar was supposed to meet him in his office at one-forty-five. Only five more minutes and they would be face to face! Suddenly, Kripke heard a knock on his office door. He froze for a second and then called out, "Come in!"

The doorknob turned and the door opened and there stood Lee Sylvar, much to the surprise of one Barry Kripke. Barry had been expecting a male, but in front of him stood a woman. No, not just a woman, a beautiful woman. Lee Sylvar looked to be somewhere in her mid-thirties with dark, shoulder length hair and bright green eyes. For once in his life, Barry Kripke was left speechless.

The tall brunette finally broke the silence by extending her hand and greeting Kripke with, "Dr. Kripke. I am so pleased to finally meet you. I have been looking forward to this for some time now." Her voice was low and sultry, with just a hint of flirtation in it.

Barry took the woman's hand, shook it, and replied, "The pweshuh is mine, Ms. Sylvah."

Lee Sylvar grinned and asked him, "So, shall we sit and talk? I'd love to get to know you better, Dr. Kripke."

Barry was beside himself at the attention the lovely brunette was giving him, "Pwease, call me Bawwy."

She laid one of her hands on top of his, "Okay, Barry. Where do you want to begin? I've been reading up on your work and I find it fascinating." She leaned in closer to her prey, "I've always been a sucker for a man with brains." Her hand began to stroke his seductively and her green eyes met his and sent a white hot heat up and down his spine.

Kripke gave her a knowing look and said, "Well, we could ahways tawk ovuh dwinks. Unwess you want to stay heuh."

Lee's hand began to stroke Barry's arm, "Oh, I think drinks sound delightful, if a little naughty this time of day. Do you enjoy getting naughty this time of day?"

Barry swallowed hard and responded, "Awn't you going to intuhview me?"

Ms. Sylvar withdrew her hand and smiled seductively, "Of course, Barry. But I like to get my subjects relaxed before we start. I get better interviews when I know the subject, how should I put this, more intimately."

Barry's pulse began to race and he stammered, "How wewaxed should we get?"

She leaned toward Kripke suggestively, "I'll leave that up to you. I suppose we will need to meet more than once to get this interview done in the in-depth manner I want."

Barry grinned back at her and stated, "Well, to stawt off, I do have a widdle wine in my wefwidgewatuh."

"Oh, that sounds lovely! Could you pour us each a glass? I want us to become good friends. Does that sound good to you, Barry? I don't want to offend you, so let me know if I go too far."

Kripke went over to the refrigerator, pulled out a half-filled wine bottle and poured some into two plastic glasses, "No. I think some dwinks would be pewfect. A beautifuw woman wike you can nevuh go too faw, at weast with me."

"Now that's good to hear." She took her drink from Kripke and winked at him flirtatiously. "I must admit, and I hope you won't be offended, that I find you very attractive. I wasn't counting on that, but do you think we could use that to our advantage?"

Kripke walked over to his desk and sat in his chair. He patted his lap and told Ms. Sylvar, "Why don't you sit hewe a foh a bit and we can get bettuh aquainted?"

Lee Sylvar broke out into a smile and thought; _this is going easier than Raj said it would. This guy is a total sleazeball._ Out loud, she said, "I thought you'd never ask." and sat herself comfortably into Kripke's lap, keeping her drink in her hand the entire time.

Kripke began to run his hand over her body and she let him know she was enjoying it. Barry then got bolder and pulled her head close to his for a kiss. They kissed for a minute or so and Kripke began to run his hands up and down one of her legs. When she didn't stop him he let one of his hands wander up under her skirt. His breath was coming faster and when she said nothing in reproach his hand ventured upwards and began to pull down her panies. Suddenly, Kripke jumped up, depositing the lovely Lee Sylvar on the floor and exclaimed, "Howy Cwist! You ah no wady, you ah a fuckin' dude!"

Lee looked up at him with big eyes, "You mean, you didn't know? Haven't you read any of my books? All the details are there on the dust jacket."

"What's yoh weal name and who sent you hewe?"

Lee removed the long brunette wig and exposed his/her short Marine haircut, "My real name is Lee Sylar and I came here to interview you for my book. No one 'sent' me." Lee then reached inside his/her blouse and pulled out two foam rubber 'falsies', "Sometimes I look like Lady Lee and sometimes I look a bit more butch, like this."

Kripke's face went white and he pointed a shaky finger at the door, "Get out of my office! Now! I don't want to be in any book you aw witing! Get out and nevuh come back!"

Lee chuckled, "If you insist. By the way, thank you for the wine. It was very good, but you're kiss was even nicer."

Kripke's face went scarlet and he screamed, "OUT!"

Lee Syvlar beat a hasty retreat out the door and laughed all the way down the hall. Raj had been right; Mr. Barry Kripke had fallen for their little joke hook, line, and sinker with very little effort on his part. Of course, he had been forced to sit on Kripke's lap and kiss him, but he had been well compensated for his efforts. Plus, the look on Barry's face when he had encountered the ol' trouser snake was priceless. Lee headed over to Howard's lab, eager to share a good laugh over the incident and have it end there. Only it didn't end there.

Unbeknownst to Howard, after Leonard had left him the night before, he had accidently wired both the audio and video cables into the physic department's main server and when the joke went down, it went down in front of everyone in every classroom, office, and lab in the Bridge Physics Building at Cal Tech. Sheldon in his office, Leonard in his lab, Raj in his office, Amy in the cafeteria taking a late lunch, and Howard in his lab all watched in both wild amusement and horror as Project Payback appeared on every projection screen and computer monitor that was turned on in the building, which was most of them.

After Lee had left, Kripke sat at his desk with his head in his hands, wondering how he could have been so naïve. Who had set him up for that, or had Sylvar really been there for an actual interview? Barry didn't know for sure, but he hoped it was the latter so no one but he and Sylvar would know what had just gone down.

Suddenly his office phone began to ring and he answered it. It was President Siebert wanting to know what the hell was going on. "How is what going on?" Kripke answered him.

"You, feeling up the drag queen. It's on every computer and TV monitor in the entire building. I think it's now gone viral on YouTube and twitter. These students nowadays just love their social media. I hope you have a good explanation for this."

Kripke stumbled over his words as he attempted to explain, "I thought she…he…was going to intuhview me fow a book."

Siebert snorted in derision, "So you gave them some wine and kissed them. Is that how you usually prepare yourself for interviews, Dr. Kripke?"

Barry replied with a feeble, "We wuh twying to get to know each othuh bettuh."

Siebert couldn't help himself, he laughed so hard he snorted, "You did do that, Barry! Look, I think you've been punished enough for this little incident. As far as I'm concerned, it never happened. Now, what everyone else who saw this thinks, I have no control over. But Barry?"

"Yes?"

"That was a hell of a kiss!" Siebert then hung up the phone and pounded his desk in laughter. When he had regained some semblance of control, he fired up his computer and went to YouTube to watch the entire thing all over again.

Barry Kripke sat alone in his office, completely humiliated. He wondered who would do something so devious to him. His first thought was Cooper, but Barry knew that man lacked the necessary creative mind to come up with so devious a plan. He was zoned out, staring at the floor, wondering how he was ever going to able to show his face on campus again when he spied something unfamiliar lying in the corner. Upon closer inspection he saw that it was a small, plastic asthma inhaler. Suddenly all the puzzle pieces began to come together in his mind.

 **Uh oh.**


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25: Penny Ante

I wasn't sure how to follow up my last chapter, and then bamadude planted the grain of this idea in my head. The next two chapters were inspired by one of his most excellent reviews. Enjoy!

 **It was a few days after Project Payback had gone down and I was busy in my lab, recording the mental and physical status of my simian subjects.** Suddenly, a knock had come on my door and a very serious looking man introduced himself to me.

"Good morning, Dr. Fowler. My name is Todd Simmons and I have been sent here by Dr. Cooper. He requests your presence in his office immediately."

I immediately smelled a rat and asked Mr. Simmons, "Why didn't Sheldon call me himself? He has my number."

The mysterious Mr. Simmons responded to my query with, "Dr. Fowler, this is a very sensitive issue he wants to discuss with you. He did not want to take the chance of someone intercepting any message he might have sent you through technological devices."

God, the man even spoke like Sheldon. My walls began to lower just a bit and I replied, "So he told a perfect stranger about it?"

Simmons stared at me with a deadpan face, "Dr. Cooper gave me no details, Ma'am. He just sent me to fetch you. That is all."

I decided a firm refusal was then in order, I had not liked the man's attitude at all, "Tell Dr. Cooper that I will see him in his office after lunch."

Mr. Simmons then positioned himself between me and the door, "No, that won't do. Dr. Cooper insisted on seeing you immediately."

Now, that sounded enough like Sheldon to convince me of the man's sincerity, so I finished recording the monkey data in the logbook and followed Mr. Simmons out the door. Only we weren't headed towards Sheldon's office, we were headed for the exit at the end of the hall.

I had stopped walking and asked him, "Where are we going? This is not the way to Sheldon's office?"

After I had spoken, he firmly grabbed hold of my arm and told me, "Just keep walking and no one will get hurt."

I was both concerned and curious, so I had asked him, "Who is no one?"

The man had responded to my query in an icy voice that asked, "Do the names Penny and Bernadette mean anything to you?"

"My god, those are my two best friends! Do you have them, too?" I made a valiant effort to pull my arm from his grasp. I had fully intended to free myself and run in the other direction as fast as I could. But his next words had halted that thought immediately."

"Yes, but you don't have to believe me if you don't want to. But are you willing to gamble on that? I don't think you would want your friends to have an 'accident', would you?"

What could I have said? Not a whole hell of a lot. So, I followed Mr. Simmons to his car and saw that he had not come alone. He had a sidekick with him that I never did get the pleasure of being introduced to. Anyway, this sidekick clumsily tied a blindfold on me and off we went.

After about 20 minutes the car came to a stop and I was helped out of the car, still blindfolded and led up some stairs, down a hall, and deposited in what felt like a wooden kitchen chair. I kept silent, I mean, what would have been the point of talking? I pretty much knew what was going on. Just like in the movies, I had been kidnapped, blindfolded, and taken to a mysterious destination. I had actually been more curious than scared; I suppose that was the scientist in me coming out.

When I had been fastened securely in my seat, my blindfold had been removed and once my eyes had adjusted to the light I had found myself sitting in a building I had driven by many, many, times. According to the placards on the walls, I was in the old Monrovia Train Depot, which was less than ten miles from Cal Tech. I was about to wonder why they had chosen this building when I suddenly noticed the other abductees who I had been placed between.

A foot on either side of me, their mouths taped shut and their hands and legs bound much like mine, sat Penny and Bernadette in chairs identical to mine. I was about to panic when Penny slyly winked at me. At that moment I had known my crafty friend had the situation well in hand and all I had to do was trust her and wait. Seeing as I was tied to a chair at the moment, that seemed like a pretty reasonable thing to do.

Simmons' accomplice looked at the three of us and gave an evil smile. After removing the tape from Penny and Bernadette's mouths he shook his head and clucked at us, "Well, well, well. Three pretty maids all in a row. Oh, don't bother yelling for help. This room has been soundproofed. Just in case, ya know? I wonder what your men folk are going to think about you guys going missing."

Bernie had shaken her head sadly and told him, "They most likely won't notice."

"Whaddaya mean they won't notice?" the accomplice had barked.

Penny had merely shrugged her shoulders and admitted in a resigned voice, "It's Wednesday."

"So?"

I attempted to explain this to them in further detail, "Wednesday is Halo night. It's a ritual with them."

Bernie had nodded in agreement and sighed, "Yeah, they probably won't even notice we're gone until tomorrow morning."

Penny added, "At the earliest."

I had agreed with her, "Yeah, they generally crash at Raj's place."

"Then I guess we're going to have to send then an anonymous note then, telling them we have you."

Penny had immediately perked up at that and asked, "You mean like a ransom note?"

Simmons had busied himself with tightening Bernie's ropes and replied in an offhand way, "Yeah, something like that."

Her entire countenance then changed and she cooed, "That's cool! I've never been ransomed before."

Bernie turned and snapped at her, "Shut up, Penny. You're not helping things here."

Penny had looked at her, smiled, and made an attempt to lighten things up a bit, "Hey, I was just trying to make the best of things, you know?"

I transferred my gaze from my friends to my captor and interjected, "Excuse me for interrupting here, but what exactly is the ransom going to be?"

Simmons chuckled to himself evilly and replied, "That's for us to know and you girls not to find out."

I had thought for a second or two and responded to him in a not very optimistic tone, "Well, whatever it is, I do hope you get in touch with our men. This place has no heating system; it's an abandoned train station, after all. It could get pretty cold in here tonight."

The accomplice addressed all of us with, "Ladies, if your men play ball with us, you should all be tucked in safe and sound in your very own beds before nightfall. That is, _if_ your men cooperate. Now ladies, I must bid you a fond farewell for now. My partner and I have places to go and people to talk to when we get there."

Bernie had looked shocked and blurted out, "You mean you're just going to leave us here?"

The man walked over and had the temerity to pat Bernadette on the top of her cranium, "Don't you worry your pretty little heads about that one. We'll both be back in a couple of hours." I swear, at that, Bernie would have killed him if she hadn't been tied to a chair.

When they had left, Penny waited a few minutes and then announced, "Let me get myself untied here and then I'll help you guys. Damn, I hope that restroom over there works; I've got to pee like a racehorse!

I had been surprised at what she said and asked her, "Penny, you can untie yourself?"

Her hands were suddenly free and she explained to us, "Hey, I was raised in Nebraska. That's real cowboy country. These two are not cowboys. They tied me up with a simple slip knot with a half hitch. Child's play." She then leaned down to untie her legs. Once she had gotten the circulation returned to them she untied each of us and then headed off to the restroom. We soon heard a flushing noise and Penny reappeared a minute later with a big smile on her face and told us, "Guess what guys, the bathroom is operational!"

Bernie had shaken her hands in an effort to restore some circulation to them and questioned Penny, "Where did you learn all about knots?"

Penny had talked absent mindedly as she walked around the room, taking stock of all its dimensions and the furniture within. "Like I said, I grew up in Nebraska. It's kind of a rite of passage. Anyway, now that we're free we've got to come up with a plan."

I had been amazed she would say that and I confronted her with, "A plan for what? Why don't we just walk out the door over there? The street's about a hundred yards away."

Penny then laughed in a nasty manner and put her hands on her waist, took a determined looking stance, and replied, "What? And not find out what this is all about and then put some hurtin' on these guys? Not a chance. Look, the guys are busy tonight and probably won't even know we're gone until they're done playing Halo, which if we go by their past performance, should be around midnight. Now, I for one don't want to be here at midnight. I also don't want to leave this whole thing unsolved. Who knows? They could try this again and next time they might use better knots. I estimate we've got about an hour and a half until the Bobbsey Twins return, so let's make good use of our time."

After we had put our heads together and came up with a plot to not only get revenge, but also find out who had been behind all of this, we set to work and in about an hour we stepped back and viewed our work with satisfaction. Now, all we needed was for them to return and fall directly into our trap.

Meanwhile, back at Leonard's apartment…

 **That Wednesday night had started off much like any other, until I called Amy during a break to ask her if while I was gone she could record a PBS program that I was interested in watching.** For the first time since we had become a couple her phone had kept ringing.

I had then voiced my concerns to both Leonard and Howard, as Raj had fallen ill and taken the night off, "Gentlemen, I do believe something's wrong. I have called Amy and she has failed to answer her phone."

Howard fired back with his usual sarcastic remark, "Hey, Sheldon, maybe she finally realized what a pain in the ass you are. Now get back over here. We can't attack the base without you."

Usually I could ignore his jabs by considering the source, but that time the situation did not warrant me tolerating his silliness. I responded with, "Very funny Wolowitz. Leonard, will you humor me and place a call to Penny?"

Leonard had put down his game controller, given me an annoyed look and asked, "Why should I do that, Sheldon? She's probably out with Amy and Bernadette and they won't answer, either."

I was then forced to resort to begging, "Please, just one call."

He then emitted a frustrated sigh and responded to me plea with, "Okay. Then can we get back to Halo?"

"Of course."

Leonard had pulled out his phone and called Penny. Eventually he put it back in his pocket and murmured to himself, "That's funny."

I was then both extremely concerned and curious and asked him, "What? Didn't she answer?"

"Her phone's dead. Penny never fails to charge her phone. She damn near lives on that thing. Howard, try calling Bernadette."

Howard had seemed completely unfazed by this turn of events, "Wait, my only night of the week away from Bernie and you want me to call her?"

Once more I resorted to begging, "Please."

With great resignation, Howard had put down his controller and picked up his phone, "Okay. But if she makes me leave I'm blaming it all on you, Sheldon." As he called her, a puzzled look came over his face and he told us, "That's funny; her phone is dead, too. All right, I called, I couldn't get through, I did what you asked me to do. Now, could we please get back to Halo for cryin' out loud?"

Leonard seemed surprised by his cavalier attitude and had barked at him, "Howard, aren't you worried about your girlfriend?"

Howard then did a fairly good imitation of me rolling my eyes and picked his game controller back up, "Not really. She's a big girl. She can take care of herself. Now, let's get back to Halo."

Thankfully, Leonard was now on my side and he would not let him slide on the issue, "Wait, Howard. Sheldon may have a point. Penny and Bernadette never let their phones die. Something may have actually happened to them."

"Okay. Maybe something has. But what are we going to do about it? Until someone notifies us otherwise, I'm going to assume they are out having a good time and forgot to charge their phones."

I did not let it go and pushed him, "But what if something did happen to them, Howard?"

He then looked at both Leonard and me with complete disdain, "Geeze, sometimes I wished the ladies came with a built in honing device."

For once, I began to agree with him and then the proverbial light bulb went off in my head,"Yes, so do…Howard, they do, but not like you were thinking. Amy's phone! Both of us always have our GPS turned on so we know where the other one is in case we need to get in touch with each other. Don't you see? Amy's phone will tell me where she is!"

Howard had a snarky reply ready and told me, "Yeah? Well I'm willing to bet her phone will tell you that she's at Penny's place."

My patience with him finally reached its end and I stood up and called Amy's number, "Okay, Howard, let's just see about that. Hmmmm…that's odd."

Leonard had gotten up and come over to me, "What, buddy?"

"Amy's phone says she's in Monrovia."

Leonard had looked completely befuddled and muttered, "Monrovia? Why would she be there?"

"I don't know, but I think we should go find her."

Once again Howard addressed the issue by waving it off and asking, "Why do we need to do that?"

I had replied to him in my most condescending voice, "Because I'm willing to bet that when we locate Amy, we will also find Penny and Bernadette."

Leonard then crossed the room and retrieved his jacket, "Okay, I'll go with you. Let's leave now."

Howard had stared at both of us unbelievingly and whined in his usual fashion, "Wait, what about our game? Oh never mind. Let my get my jacket and I'll go with you guys. I think they're all okay, but Sheldon isn't going to let this rest until we drive out there. With any luck, we'll find them at some restaurant or another and then we can come back here and finish our game."

I had then looked down at my phone and advised them, "Gentlemen, I think we'd better hurry."

Howard then decided that the situation called for a little sarcasm, "Why is that, Sheldon? What has your incredibly crazy mind come up with this time?"

"Someone just left me a text message while we were talking."

He then looked at me as if he really did believe I was insane. I'm not. My mother had me tested and he knew that. Still he asked in a most snarky manner, "So what?

I decided the truth was my best weapon and informed them both, "Someone has Amy and they're holding her for ransom."

Leonard grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the door, "Shit. C'mon , Sheldon. Let's go! If they have Amy they most likely have Bernie and Penny, too."

And so we headed off to find our women folk and rescue them from the villains that had done took them. Or something along those lines, anyway. When we reached Monrovia, after me trying to get Leonard to drive faster the entire way, we followed where the GPS led us. Howard kept informing us as to how we had wasted all of the evening going on a wild goose chase, until the signal led us to the old railroad depot. Now any other time I would have been overjoyed at the prospect of exploring an ancient railroad building, but this night all I could feel was a sense of dread growing in my stomach. Even Howard went silent for awhile and then admitted, "Maybe I was wrong about this." To which Leonard had replied with a nasty glare of contempt.

As silently as we could, we all exited the car and cautiously crept up to the building. Leonard whispered to me, "Sheldon, you're the tallest. Look carefully in that window and tell us what you see. I did as he requested and peered through the dusty window to get a view of what was going on inside. Suddenly my eyes grew wide and I backed away from the window.

Leonard looked over at me with fear in his eyes, "What's the matter, Sheldon? What did you see?"

Howard nervously asked, "Are they okay?"

I opened the door for them and said, "Gentlemen, why don't you come and see for yourself." _  
_  
 **What did Sheldon see? Read the next chapter and find out.**


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26: Game On

Was whatever Sheldon had seen part of Penny's handiwork? Maybe. This chapter is going to be told solely from Amy's recollection. More good stuff happened to her and Sheldon's version would be both short and boring. I'll spare you good readers that. Besides, I love writing chapters with just the girls' interactions. Girl Power and all that.

 **Before I go on with this tale, I think I owe you a few more details of what went down between the time our captors lefts us and Sheldon peered through that window.** After she had untied us, Penny, besides talking us out of running, had walked the perimeter of the room, taking in every detail. In one corner she had found a large pile of hemp rope. She had looked down at it, then squatted and taken it in her hands, feeling the quality of it.

"Ladies," she announced, "I have a plan."

Bernie had not been in a good mood, so she had challenged her in the shrill, sarcastic voice that only she could deliver, "Okay, would you like to tell us what it is? It's starting to get dark and it's more than a little cold in here."

Penny smiled up at us and announced, "Ladies, we are going to make us a net."

Bernie was out of patience at that point and snapped at her, "Out of what?"

Penny held up the rope and had triumphantly stated, "Out of this!"

I shook my head in disbelief. This was waay out of my area of expertise and I had told her so. "Penny, I haven't the slightest idea of how to make a net."

She narrowed her eyes and turned to our tiny counterpart, "Bernie, what about you?"

Bernie had looked down at the rope in Penny's hands sadly and confessed, "Yeah, I know how. I used to go fishing a lot with my dad when I was a kid. He always put me to work mending his damn nets."

"Good. Between me and you, we should be able to show Amy how to do this."

I remember I had freaked out and shouted at her, "You want me to help you guys make a net?"

Penny had pretty much decided at that moment that keeping it light was in her best interests if she wanted my help, so she teased me with, "Hey, you never know when it will come in handy with the Wackadoodle. You know, if he ever tries to run."

At that pronouncement I had taken a step back from her; I was more than a little insulted. I looked at Bernie and she was nodding in agreement with Penny. I challenged the both of them with, "Are you saying that Sheldon isn't devoted to me?"

Penny then stood up , walked over to where I was standing, put a companionable are around my shoulders and made a valiant attempt at calming me down, "Look, Amy, we've known Sheldon a lot longer than you have. In some situations he might be a definite flight risk."

I had visibly gulped and got out of my head by deciding that it wouldn't hurt anything to learn something new. I figured it might do my brain some good to expose it to new things. God knows I had been correct about having sex. I conceded defeat and sighed, "Okay, Bernie, hand me some of that rope and let's get going."

It had taken us about an hour, but when we were finally finished we had a fairly large net of about fifteen feet square. Penny weaved a long rope through the edges making a drawstring of sorts, so that if pulled the net would collapse in on itself, trapping anything within.

I looked down at our masterpiece with pride, but was curious about one little thing, I asked Penny, "Just what are you planning on doing with this thing?"

She then took a step back and her grin was pure evil, "Let's just say the prey have become the hunters."

After that, we rigged up a set of pulleys that Penny had found in a back room with a very tall ladder, a hammer, and a box of nails and fastened them to some overhead rafters. These pulleys would allow the rope to be easily pulled, causing the net to both close shut and be hoisted about ten feet from the floor When we had finished with this little project, Penny had stopped and surveyed our handiwork, giving occasional clucks of satisfaction.

Because she had done the majority of the work on the net, Bernie had looked both tired and mentally drained. She managed to smile weakly and ask Penny, "Now what do we do?"

Penny took a seat on one of the chairs at the back of the room, the rope in her hands, and answered her with a single word, "Wait."

It turned out we didn't have to wait very long. We used tiny Bernie as our lookout. We positioned her on top of a box to the side of one of the front windows. No one would really notice her there peering out of the building to tell us when the 'bad guys' had pulled up and were heading our way.

It had been about thirty minutes from the time we had finished our 'fishing net' until they pulled up to the depot. Night had fallen and all of us were cold, tired, and hungry. Penny wasn't about to let any of us give up on our mission because of personal discomforts, though. She was much stronger both mentally and physically than I had given her credit for. She had turned to all of us and commanded, "Everyone, get to your positions. Amy, you know what to say, right?"

I had merely nodded; my mouth had gone dry with fear and anticipation.

"Bernie, you know your part?"

She just gave Penny and evil grin and nodded as well. She had then looked out the window because of a noise outside and suddenly called out, "They're here!"

Penny gave us a wink and in a conspiratorial whisper, led our plan of attack with the words, "Okay everyone. On the count of five. One, two, three, four, FIVE!"

Bernie cried loud enough to be heard down the block (we had found out while making our net that the room had not been soundproofed at all), "C'mon guys, we're finally untied. Let's make a break for it!"

I then spoke my part, "Wait; let me grab my purse and my phone. I have all the pictures of this place on it. Then, let's hightail it to the nearest police station."

I am proud to say that Penny's plan worked like a charm. With the fear of us escaping and ratting them out to the authorities, our captors came barging into the room so quickly they failed to see the net right in front of them. When they were all centered inside it, Penny pulled hard on the rope activating the counter gravitational force we had set up with the pulleys (my contribution) and within a second, all three of them were swinging gaily from the rafters.

Wait, did I say three of them? I did. In the net, alongside Mr. Simmons and his nameless accomplice, hung one Mr. Barry Kripke. Penny had shouted out excitedly, "Now we've got ya, suckers!"

Bernie had rubbed her hands together like a mad scientist, looked up and crowed at Simmons, "Never underestimate the powers of women, you putz!"

At that point, I decided to inject a more somber note to the proceedings and asked Penny, "What do we do now?"

Bernie had pointed to a far corner of the room and chuckled, "I say we get that pitchfork over there and poke their butts."

Penny became the voice of sanity and stopped her train of thought, "No, Bernie. No violence. That's their style. Amy, whip out that phone of yours and call the cops. We have quite a little story to tell them."

We heard a pathetic voice call from above, "Wait. Don't do that. It would wuin me."

Penny gazed up at Kripke caught in the net with the others and told him, "Too bad, chump. Amy, do the honors and make the call."

Before I could begin to call 911, Sheldon, Leonard, and Howard burst into the room and looked at us with both relief and concern. All our men had run over to us and enveloped us each in a bear hug. Sheldon had been the first one to speak, "Are you ladies alright? Who made that contraption and how did all this happen?"

Penny took control of the situation and answered him, "We're fine, Sheldon. We made that contraption, and it's a long story how this all went down. Trust us, though, Kripke's a creep."

Barry had pathetically shouted down from the net, "I am not a cweep!"

Bernie shouted back at him, "Of course not. All the good guys kidnap women and tie them up."

I had immediately corrected her, "No, I could almost respect that. Kripke didn't have the balls to do that on his own, so he hired those two thugs," I pointed up at Kripke's companions in the net, "to do his dirty work for him!"

Sheldon looked shocked, "They tied you up?"

Penny nodded and pointed to the back of the room, "Yeah, to those chairs over there. Which weren't at all comfortable, by the way."

Bernie added in her squeaky little voice, "And blindfolded us, too!"

Howard had hugged his wife even harder and exclaimed, "We were so worried about you guys!"

True to form, Sheldon had corrected him, "No you weren't. You were the most upset about missing our Halo game. You ignored all of my concerns until I received that text from Simmons."

At that, Bernie removed herself from her husband's arms and exploded at him, "Howard Joel Wolowitz, is that the truth?"

He attempted a feeble explanation, "Bernie, I _was_ worried. I just figured you girls were smart enough to take care of yourselves."

Leonard took his arms from around Penny and frowned, "Howard, tell the whole truth. You might have been worried, but it wasn't about the girls."

Sheldon had squeezed me extra tight as he agreed with Leonard, "Yes. He seemed very concerned that we would have to interrupt our game of Halo."

Bernie then turned to leave and snapped, "Come on, Howard. Give me your phone; I'm calling us a cab. We'll talk more about this at home."

Howard had meekly followed her and turned back to his friends and mouthed, "Sniches!"

Penny then put her arms around her husband once more and asked him, "Leonard, were you worried?"

"I wasn't at first, but after Sheldon pointed out a couple of things to me, I sure as hell was! I couldn't drive here fast enough, even though Sheldon thought I could the entire time."

I had not been able to believe what I heard, so I blurted out, "Wait, Sheldon was the first one worried about us?"

Leonard had nodded his head at me and confirmed his statement, "Yeah. He couldn't get you on the phone and he got really concerned."

As Sheldon repeatedly kissed the top of my head I had looked up at him and inquired, "How did you find us?"

He momentarily halted his kisses and replied, "You know how we always keep our GPS active on our phones so we always know where the other one is located?"

I laid my head thankfully against his chest and responded, "Yes, but that's just a silly romantic game we play."

Leonard had stopped kissing Penny's cheek long enough to comment, "Well this time, that silly romantic game led us to you. Not that you needed our help or anything…"

Penny and I had answered that statement as one, "We will always need you guys."

Sheldon had finally let go of me and stared into my eyes, almost in disbelief, "Is that really true?"

"Yes. When I was helping Penny fashion that pulley system, I was remembering a conversation we had last week about your theory that counter gravitational forces could somehow act as catalysts for rapid movement and I applied the theory you had shared with me into its design."

Penny had snuggled further into Leonard's arms and added, "And I just kept my hopes up and never gave up because that's how you got me to be your girlfriend, Leonard. You were determined and persistent and that is what you've taught me to be, too. So, I wasn't going to stop until we'd caught these guys. Just getting loose wouldn't do, I wanted to let them feel what it was like to be trapped and helpless."

A voice was heard from up above, "Oh yeah, just wait until I teww Siebewt all about yo widdle pwan and how these wadies twapped us. You will feel hewpwess then, won't you."

Sheldon had shouted back at him, "And we will inform Dr. Siebert about how you kidnapped these women and held them for ransom."

Even tangled in a net, Kripke had found a way to be obnoxious, "And just how ah you going to tie me in to these two and thew pwans?"

Sheldon just grinned and answered Barry with a simple explanation, "Well, it seems Mr. Simmons, if that is indeed his name, sent me a text from _your_ phone informing me that you gentlemen had kidnapped our women. Said text, by the way, will be sent to Siebert with an accompanying message the second I press this little button."

At that point, Penny had looked out the window and advised Sheldon, "No matter whether you send that text or not, Kripke is screwed royally. Please open the door, Sheldon. Here come the cops and they don't look very happy."

Thirty minutes later, the Kripke gang was on their way to the police station to be booked and I was safely ensconced in the backseat of Leonard's car, one of Sheldon's arms still wrapped protectively around me.

Leonard had looked in the rear view mirror at us and chuckled a little, "All I can say is all's well that ends well."

Sheldon had been his usual self and corrected him, "The day hasn't ended yet, Leonard."

Leonard drove for awhile without saying anything and then addressed both me and Penny, "Okay. How would you girls like to end it?"

Penny smiled and squeezed her husband's leg, "All I can think of is having a hot bath and getting a full body massage. Are you up for that, Leonard?"

His grin was large and enthusiastic, "Not a problem, Penny. Whatever you want."

Sheldon then kissed me on the cheek and asked, "And how would you like to finish the day, Amy?"

All I could think about was food, so I told him, "I'm famished, so a nice big dinner and a night spent under my electric blanket works for me."

Sheldon's face had filled with disappointment when I said that and he replied in a small voice, "Oh, all right."

Then I suddenly remembered there was something besides food I was hungry for and gave a little laugh and offered him an invitation, "Sheldon, I didn't mean alone. You are invited to join me if you so wish."

He somehow managed to wrap both of his arms around me and pull me closer to him, "Oh, I wish. I wish more than you will ever know Amy Farrah Fowler."

And so ended one of the more interesting and eventful days of my life. At least for awhile. But, of course, life is nothing but a series of adventures and I was soon to embark on another one, thanks to Mr. Sheldon Lee Cooper.

What will Amy's next adventure be? And how does Sheldon fit in with it? Read on and find out. This girl's life is going to get very interesting.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27: Monkey Business

 **Things go back to normal for our couple for a little while. But what is a good story without some drama? Through a freak occurrence in Amy's lab, Sheldon's love is put to the extreme test. Will he pass?**

The next few weeks passed without much incident. Sheldon and I had our usual sleepovers and our relationship grew as we spent a good deal of time just talking with each other. Gradually we began to have sleepovers more and more often and we got to know each other's tastes, values, preferences, and quirks. I was also spending a goodly amount of time with Penny and Bernadette. It was wonderful to actually have girlfriends to talk to and go places with. I never took them for granted. For the most part, Sheldon highly approved of me hanging with his friends and was extremely pleased when they accepted me into what they called their Posse. All was going swimmingly well until that one morning in my lab….

It had been on a Monday morning about nine a.m. and I was giving my subjects their morning meal, a trail mix type of thing that they all seemed to love. I had unlocked the cage door of my favorite little guy, Solomon, and let him out to observe my actions. Solomon was both the friendliest and the most intelligent of my lab residents and we had developed both a fondness and a respect for each other that most often didn't happen in such situations. I trusted him completely and he felt the same way about me. Most of our mornings were spent with him out of his cage, as a matter of fact.

Things were going swimmingly until I came upon the cage of Benard. Benard was an ill-tempered Macaque whose nasty reputation had made its way around the entire department. For this study, I was stuck with him. I had always approached his cage with extreme caution, he was not a primate you took your eyes off of for even a split second. Ill-tempered did not completely describe his attitude towards me, his fellow monkeys, or anyone or anything else that came close to him. I understood that he was stuck in a lab as a research subject, but there was nothing I could do about that. I always treated my research subjects with both kindness and compassion. They were never 'things' to me, they were individuals that I cared about. Except for Benard. He made that very difficult, indeed.

My job on this day had been to study patterns observed during withdrawals from drugs and that was that. It's what they had been paying me to do, so I did it. It was as simple as that. I did feel for the lot of them, I really did. And the ones who were the most docile in their interactions with me I allowed to spend considerable amounts of time loose in the lab. The door was locked and they were safe with me, so why not? However, Benard and a few of the others had not earned my trust, nor I theirs, so in their cages they stayed.

Anyway, I was in the act of passing out food and I had become distracted by something Solomon was doing. That was my first mistake, I knew better than that. Especially when I was in front of Benard's cage. It only took a split second for the little monster to sink his fangs into me. I jumped back in alarm and quickly cleansed the wound on my hand, doing my best to prevent any serious infection. I knew I should have immediately contacted a doctor, but I was busy and the wound had seemed minor. That was the operative word, seemed. Within an hour I wasn't feeling very well. I began running a slight fever and felt a bit out of it. I had returned all of my charges to their cages except Solomon, who sat on the lab table observing me intently. Suddenly, my fever began to spike and the room to spin. The last thing I remembered was carefully lowering myself to the ground and looking up at dear little Solomon, peering down at me inquisitively. Unbeknownst to me, when he had seen me go down, he had grabbed my phone from the counter and pressed the number he had seen me call the most often; that of Sheldon Cooper.

 **It had begun as just a typical day at work. I was at my whiteboard contemplating the workings of the universe, when my phone loudly rang, interrupting my usual brilliant ponderings.**

For some reason, I had the good sense to answer this call instead of ignoring it as I usually did during work hours. Who knew, it may have been my favorite vixen, Amy Farrah Fowler, inviting me to her office for a 'private' luncheon. Truth be told, I never turned those offers down from her. After answering with "Hello." I was not greeted with Amy's voice on the other end. Rather, I heard a cacophonous screeching that sounded simian in nature. I was instantly alarmed, knowing that my girlfriend's current research focused on primates.

A bit hesitantly I spoke into my phone, _Very funny, Amy. Now come to the phone and talk to me._ But Amy didn't come to the phone, my ears were just subjected to more of the godawful screeching.

My sixth sense, if I believed in such a thing, then told me to get to Amy's lab asap, so that is where I immediately headed. As I ran to the biology building, assorted dark thoughts were careening off of one another in my brain. Had Amy been kidnapped again? Had she had a heart attack? (most unlikely, Amy was in perfect health) Had she suffered some sort of unfortunate accident, like a slip and fall? I was in a sheer panic by the time I opened the door of her lab and found her barely responsive on her lab floor, close to the monkey cages. One of her subjects that I knew and had actually become somewhat fond of, Solomon, was sitting atop the counter, screaming and holding Amy's phone in his hand.

I immediately jumped to the incorrect conclusion that Solomon had been somehow involved in this unfortunate affair, but I had no proof. I grabbed the phone from Solomon's little hand and hastily called 911.

A voice answered and drolly intoned, _Emergency services, how can I help you?_

 _My girlfriend is lying unconscious on the floor._

 _Do you have any idea what happened to her?_

 _None. I came into her lab and found her this way. Wait, I see bite marks on her hand._

 _Bite marks? Who would have bitten her, sir?_

 _Amy is a neurobiologist at Cal Tech. I do believe one of her monkeys may have bitten her._

 _She studies monkeys, sir?_

 _That is not important at this point in time. Just get an ambulance here as soon as possible!_

 _Of course, sir. Just stay on the line and an ambulance and rescue squad will be there shortly._

 _Thank you._

I stayed on the phone with the woman, exchanging details of Amy's work until I heard the sirens approaching the building. The woman told me to not hang up until they had arrived at the lab, which I had already known, but I did not feel the need to inform her of that fact. I was too upset about Amy, who was not only lying on the floor unconscious, but was also running a high fever.

The paramedics entered the lab and I hung up the phone. The taller of the three men asked me, "Do you have any idea what happened here?"

"I do believe one of her monkeys bit her on the hand. You can see the marks right there." I told him, pointing to the top of Amy's right hand.

The man took Amy's vitals and informed me, "She's running a pretty high fever as well and her blood pressure is spiking. Do you know if she currently has any health problems that you are aware of?"

I had shaken my head and replied, "No, none."

He looked up at me as two of the paramedics were staying on the floor with Amy while the third man went for a stretcher, "Okay. Let's get your lady here to the hospital and have her checked out. Do you know how long it's been since she was bitten?"

I had thought on that for a second or two and then replied, "Well, the blood has already completely coagulated over the wound site, so I'd say the incident occurred at least a couple of hours ago."

As they worked to stabilize her, a stretcher was brought in, Amy was placed upon it, and they made their way down the hall to the elevator. It seemed my poor girl had known nothing but bad luck since meeting me. I had the irrational thought that maybe knowing me had brought all of this misfortune upon her, but I quickly dismissed that thought as being completely illogical, and if anything else, I am a most logical person, even in times of stress. And believe me, l was feeling quite a bit of stress at that moment.

I followed the ambulance to Huntington Memorial Hospital and watched helplessly as they whisked Amy off to an unknown destination in the emergency department. A very kind admitting nurse asked me some questions regarding Amy's personal information, address, phone number, age, occupation, etc…you know, the usual questions one is asked during a hospital admittance.

It was only after I was told to take a seat and wait there until they could inform me of Amy's status, that I remembered that I had a morbid fear of hospitals and germs. The strange thing was, none of that mattered now. The only thing filling my mind was an overwhelming concern for my lady. I have never been one to pray, and I didn't know if I could bring myself to do that even then. So, I called the best prayer expert I knew, my mother.

 _Mother?_

 _Shelly! How nice to hear from you. To what do I owe this miracle of God?_

 _Please stop, Mother. I need your prayers._

 _I coulda told you that years ago, Shellybean._

 _No, these prayers would not be for me. My girlfriend has been admitted to the hospital and she is not in very good shape, I'm afraid. Could you please send up a prayer for her?_

 _You got a girlfriend, Shelly? How long has that been goin' on?_

 _A few months, Mother._

 _Of course I'll send up a million prayers if I have to. Do you know what happened?_

 _I do believe one of her monkeys bit her._

 _Does she work in a pet shop or the circus, son?_

 _No, Mother. She works at the university as a neurobiologist. She studies brains. She is researching certain drug withdrawals in primates and it seems one of them bit her this morning._

 _Okay, Shelly. I don't know how you study brains, but He will know. I'll send some prayers up directly. What's your lady's name, Shelly?_

 _Amy. Amy Farrah Fowler._

 _Now that's a mouthful for sure. I'll just call her Amy. Is that okay?_

 _As long as you pray for her, that is fine._

 _Shelly?_

 _What?_

 _As soon as you hear something, don't you waste no time calling me._

 _I won't. Now I have some other calls to make. I'm sure Cal Tech has notified her family members, but I still need to notify our friends._

 _You two have the same friends?_

 _Yes, Mother. We all work at the same place, after all._

 _Of course. Now, I'm gonna start prayin' and you start making those calls. I'll talk to you soon, Shelly._

 _As soon as I know something, I will be in touch._

 _Okay. 'Bye son._

 _Goodbye, Mother._

A couple of slow, tortuous hours later, a doctor came into the room and called my name. I jumped up, walked over to him, and asked, "How is she, doctor? Have you discovered what is wrong with her?"

He greeted me cordially then cut to the chase, "Hello, Dr. Cooper. You are not a blood relative, but you are the closest thing she has to that right here. Ms. Fowler was bitten by a Macaque monkey who carried the Herpes B virus. Are any of her monkeys Macaques?"

I had known immediately which monkey he was asking about, so I informed him, "Just one that I know of, Benard. He's an awful animal. Both cantankerous and extremely aggressive."

He nodded thoughtfully and then continued, "I see. We have obtained permission from the university to take all of her research subjects in for testing. When they are cleared for Herpes B, they will be returned to her lab."

My mind had been in a fog or I would not have had to ask this question, "How would Herpes B cause a high fever and loss of consciousness?"

He responded to my inquiry with a cryptic, "It wouldn't, unless it developed into encephalitis and spread to her brain. Bites from Macaque monkeys are prone to doing that. She is very lucky you informed us of how this happened. We may have lost precious time running tests if we hadn't known she was bitten. Thank you for that, Mr. Cooper. You may have just saved her life."

I had had enough of idle chit chat, I needed to know Amy's condition so I asked, "How is she?

"She is in a coma, but has been stabilized. The next forty-eight hours are critical. If she has a chance of full recovery, it will most likely happen within that time frame."

After work, one by one, all of our friends had come to the hospital to see how Amy was doing. I had never before in my life had my heart hurt so badly. I was scared, sad, despondent, hopeful, and encouraging, all at different times. I thought to myself, _Amy will be just fine. She has to be. If not, there is no way I can carry on. She is my life and I must be here for her, no matter what happens._

I had asked Leonard to bring me blankets, a couple of changes of clothing, my laptop, some tea, and a collection of scientific journals to read. I was not going to leave Amy's side until we left this hospital together. The hospital, however, had entertained other ideas. As I was not a blood relative, it seemed I had no rights of visitation after Amy had been transferred to a private room in ICU, which was almost unheard of unless you were famous or unbelievably rich. I wondered how that was possible, being that she was not a celebrity of any kind nor immensely wealthy, but the hospital informed me that Cal Tech was footing the bill for it. I thought that was very generous of them, but their largesse still did nothing to solve the problem of me getting to stay with Amy.

Suddenly, a brilliant idea came to me. I instructed Leonard, "Go to our apartment and while you are there retrieving my personal items, I want you to go to my desk and find the small black box in the top right drawer. Do not look inside of it, but bring it to me as soon as possible." Leonard, good friend that he was (and still is) asked me no questions and immediately left to fulfill my request.

I was sitting in the waiting room, almost delusional from worry, when Leonard returned with my personal belongings and one small, black box.

Curiosity finally got the better of him and he asked, "What's in that box, buddy?"

As I had turned away from him to check that the box's contents were in their usual resting place, I answered him cryptically, "All of you," meaning all our friends who had joined me in the waiting room, "will soon find out. Can you promise me one thing?"

"What's that?" Penny asked, more curious than surprised. She, of all our friends, seemed to know me the best and she had figured out that I had come up with a plan to gain access to Amy's room. She was the biggest 'shipper' of the relationship between Amy and me, so I knew she could be counted on for support.

I told them, "Just go along with whatever I say. This is of the utmost importance to me."

Raj had surprisingly taken charge and nodded solemnly and assured me, "Sure, we can do that. No problem." The rest of them nodded enthusiastically in agreement with him, so I made my way to the admitting desk and asked to see Amy.

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Cooper. But we have already told you that the only people who can see Ms. Fowler besides her doctors and nurses are blood relatives."

I then sighed impatiently and went for it, "I understand that very well. But tell me, does being betrothed count for anything?

The admitting clerk entire countenance changed and she asked me, "You mean you are her fiancé?

"Yes, that is exactly what I mean." All my friends stifled their looks of surprise and disbelief, so my little ploy went over fairly well.

She then asked me in a wary voice, "We didn't see an engagement ring on Ms. Fowler's finger, Mr. Cooper. How are we to know you and not lying to us?"

I then opened the small black box and showed her the diamond ring resting inside of it.

The woman fixed me with an unsympathetic stare and asked, "Are you sure that is a real engagement ring? It could have been borrowed from one of your friends."

Penny came walking over and informed the nurse in her best conspiratorial voice, "That ring is the real deal, nurse. I went to the mall with him and helped him pick it out. He had it made special for Amy. See how unique it is?"

The truth was, the ring _did_ look unique because it hadn't been purchased at a mall at all. It had been hand made by my Pop-Pop for my Meemaw. It was one of a kind and I had been fully intending to propose to Amy with it, but not for at least another six months. Circumstances being what they were, a little white lie was a necessary evil, or at least I thought so.

The ward clerk was won over, as I had intended her to be and an hour later I was sitting in a chair beside my beloved Amy, pretending to read a comic book, but in actuality keeping an eagle eye on her for any signs of improvement. Things pretty much stayed that way for the next four days. I had only ventured from Amy's side to procure nourishment or to use the restroom. Any other time, I was by her side, intent on not missing the exact moment when she emerged from her coma. I pretended to do work on my computer, read, or watch Netflix, but in reality I was watching over Amy, almost willing her to open her eyes and speak. But she never did. Day drifted into night and back into day again until on the fifth day, the doctor came and pulled me outside her room to give me some devastating news.

"Dr. Cooper, it has been five days since Ms. Fowler has been admitted and we have seen very little improvement in her condition. I don't know how to tell you this, but she may stay like this for a very long time, possibly for the rest of her life. We will keep doing everything we can for her, but sooner or later she will have to be transferred to some form of rehab or hospice center. Eventually, there will be nothing more we can do."

I must have been in shock because I stumbled back into Amy's room and took my usual seat. I stared at her, lying there so peacefully and for the very first time in my life, my heart truly broke over the suffering of another. I wanted my Amy back. My laughing, bantering, smart aleck, affectionate, Amy. This was not how she would have wanted to spend the rest of her life, I knew that. I felt so powerless in that situation and I was not at all used to that feeling.

Through my distress, I had heard a noise and looked up. Somehow, Leonard had snuck his way past the nurses' desk and into the room. He put a finger to his lips to silence me and went over to Amy and looked at her, tears forming in his eyes.

He looked back at me and spoke in a gentler manner than I had ever heard him speak in before, "I wish I had the right words right now, buddy, to make this all better. But I don't. Please know that Howard, Bernie, Raj, Penny, and me are here for you if you need us. I wish things were different, I really do."

He had turned to leave when I grabbed him and began to literally cry on his shoulder, "I don't know what to do without her, Leonard. She is the most important thing in this world to me. How can I go on if she doesn't make it? How can I do it? I'm lost, Leonard. I love her so, so, much and I want her back with me, the way she was!"

Suddenly, a voice softly spoke from the bed and both Leonard and I turned around in shock. "Hey, Sheldon. Could you keep it down? I've got a hell of a headache."

 **It seems that Amy has woke up. But will there be any residual effects from being in a coma that long and having that high fever? Read on to find out.**


	28. Chapter 28

28: Cool Your Jets

 **What was it like for Amy while she was in that coma? Let her tell you herself. This chapter is Amy's, not Sheldon's.**

After I had lowered myself to the floor of my lab, my head began to spin wildly. To say I suffered from vertigo would be putting it mildly. I had never been so dizzy before Chapter in my life. Suddenly, the spinning ceased and I felt myself falling into what seemed like a giant, black velvet pillow. In my soft, silent cocoon I began to drift away and all I could feel was a cozy warmth spreading throughout my body.

Every once in a while I would almost regain consciousness, but I never became completely alert. I vaguely remembered Solomon screaming, being lifted up and carried somewhere, muffled voices, and being jabbed with some needles. But there was no pain involved, nor any comprehension on my part as to where I was or what was happening to me. One thing I could clearly recall was that every time I floated anywhere near consciousness, Sheldon had been right there, sitting off to my right. If I could have willed myself to move, I would have reached out and touched him. That fact alone gave me the incentive to keep fighting the darkness when I could.

Eventually the warm feeling faded and I was left in a complete void. No sounds, no tactile sensations, nothing permeated the black emptiness surrounding me. I must have drifted through this void for some time, as it seemed I had existed within it forever. From what I can remember, though I don't recall being aware of time passing, some feeing began to return to me. I felt cold. Very, very, cold. It felt like I was stuck in a freezer while wearing one of those spaghetti strap tops that Penny often wore. I was not comfortable. None of what I suppose I can refer to as the 'real world' reached me with any sort of effect, whatsoever. I was one with the cold and I did not like it at all.

Then the pain made itself known. A throbbing, piercing pain that seemed to enter my head through one ear, stay awhile, and then exit the other. If a pain can be searing and pounding at the same time, that's what I was experiencing. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I recognized that these sensations I was experiencing meant I was about to emerge from the darkness that had surrounded me. Suddenly, I l heard voices I couldn't quite place and they were only making my head hurt worse. I wanted them to stop taking in the worst way, but I had not regained my voice at that point, so I continued to lay there, hurting and mute.

Eventually I could stand it no longer. I was not aware of how long the voices had been talking or even if it was the same people. What I did know, however, was that those voices were making my head hurt terribly. If only I could have spoken, I would have stopped the ubiquitous noise much sooner than I did. Finally, I had had enough. I listened carefully to the voices. One was very soft, kind, and gentle. I assumed that was Leonard. He has always been a very kind man in tragic situations and I had been quite sure that for Sheldon, this situation was, indeed, tragic. Then it dawned on me…the other voice belonged to Sheldon! Hallelujah! Now I could ask him to please stop talking. Only I couldn't talk, could I? If ever a woman had been determined to speak, it was me at that moment in time. I had to shut him up, his voice was filling my head with terrible pain.

So, without my even knowing it, I muttered a plea for him cease and desist with the chatter. When I realized I had actually spoken, I tried out the ol' eyes. I managed to get one of them slightly opened and then the other one followed soon after. I saw Sheldon come over to the bed and smile so broadly you would have thought he had finally won that Nobel Prize he has always lusted after.

"Amy!" was all he said, but it was enough.

"Sheldon." I answered him. Yeah, we were both people of few words sometimes.

I then heard Leonard tell him, "I'm going to go get the doctor. Don't go anywhere."

I decided to attempt a joke, so I responded with, "I'll try, but I've got a strong craving for some Starbucks."

As soon as those words had left my lips, Sheldon had enveloped me in the sweetest hug I had ever felt. "You aren't going anywhere, little lady, until you've been medically checked out. Then I will go get you any flavor of coffee or tea your heart desires."

Hey, the guy was good. I weakly hugged him back and whispered, "A girl could fall in love with a guy like you."

He had winked at me and replied with just the slightest hint of smug, "Oh, I thought you already had."

This semblance of our usual teasing banter had brought a smile to my face and I gleefully gave it right back to him, "Nothing gets by you, does it?"

Sheldon finally unwrapped his arms from me and walked over to the large window on the far side of the room and looked out over the San Gabriel Valley. As if on cue, he responded lightly at first, and then with a dead seriousness he usually reserved for his work, "Not if I can help it. Now, Amy, you must tell me, which one of your lab monkeys bit you?"

The pieces had begun to fall into place and I sat straight up in the bed and asked, "Is that what caused all of this? And by this I mean me being here in this hospital."

Sheldon had turned from the window and walked back over to my side. He took one of my hands in his and smiled down at me, "Yes. You were bitten by a monkey who carried Herpes B and that developed into encephalitis."

I knew full well what encephalitis was, I do study the brain, and a weird fear came over me when I realized how close I had come to dying. I responded to what Sheldon had told me in an effort to boost my morale, if nothing else, "That's strange, outside of a headache, my brain function seems quite normal."

Seemingly out of nowhere, a doctor had appeared in the room and informed me in a very serious voice, "For which you should thank your fiancé. He informed us very quickly that you had been bitten by one of your research subjects. That helped us in your diagnosis and treatment immeasurably. I'm going to leave now but I will return and run some simple tests on you to see how you are doing, okay?"

Fiance? My mind darted this way and that, trying in vain to recall any sort of proposal from Sheldon. I came up with a blank. But why would he tell people we were engaged if it were not so? I decided to play it cool and merely nodded and smile at the doctor's retreating form.

As soon as the doctor had left the room to order some testing equipment, Sheldon whispered to me, "I had to tell them we were engaged in order to be able to stay in the room with you."

To tell you the truth, I had a bit of a letdown at his words and my face must have shown it. He most likely noticed this because he then took my hand, and reassured me, "Just cool your jets, Amy. I fully intend to propose to you, but this is neither the time nor the place."

I had to laugh a bit at that. I mean, he did have a point. A hospital gown and plastic breakfast tray did not compare to a lovely evening dress and a secluded table at a romantic restaurant. I managed to produce an understanding smile before telling him, "I do believe I can be patient, Sheldon. Some things are worth waiting for."

It wasn't long after that when a team of doctors entered the room and began poking, prodding, and assaulting me with what they referred to as 'tests'. I'm a neuroscientist and I was more than a little familiar with what tests one runs on a patient to determine their level of cognitive function. They did run a few of those tests on me, but some of the others I filed away as a useless way of justifying their paychecks and also as a way of impressing the young interns who were following in their wake.

Anyway, after a long battery of tests were run, it was decided that no long term negative effects from the coma were manifesting themselves. In fact, I had scored extremely highly in my brain function. The head (lol) doctor then advised that I should remain in the hospital for two more days to help regain my physical strength before I was released. I agreed under two conditions. One, Sheldon had to be allowed to bring me food from outside the hospital. And two, that a proper bed be brought in for him to rest on. The couch in the room may have fit some men, but my lover was a bit on the tall side and he needed a bed to sleep on, not a couch. When both issues had been agreed upon, Sheldon left the hospital, albeit reluctantly, to get me some sushi.

It was while he was away on that particular errand that Penny made her way up to see me. Now that I was out of grave danger, the hospital had determined that my friends were more than welcome to visit me, though their visits were limited in regards to time.

Penny wordlessly handed me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a box of candy. When she finally spoke it was to ask me, "Is there anything I can get you?"

Her thoughtfulness had truly touched me and I told her, "I really can't think of anything at the moment. Sheldon is out fetching me some sushi and reading material as we speak."

Her grin then turned mischievous and she suggested, "How about I go get you a proper nightie? Those hospital gowns are awful!"

I had given that some serious thought and then replied, "Okay. If you go to my apartment you will find my nightgowns and robes hanging in my bedroom closet. Just pick one of each and bring them back to me."

Penny had held up one of her hands and shook her head vigorously, "Oh no you don't. Girl, you just recovered from encephasomething and from what Leonard has told me, you are very lucky to be alive and in good shape. That calls for something besides your usual grandma flannel pajamas. I'm going to buy you a really sexy peignoir set and bring it back here for you. What's your favorite color? Never mind. With those eyes of yours it should be either black or green."

I had attempted to lodge a protest, I did not feel the need for that form of lingerie, it was not my style at all. I attempted to deter her with, "Penny, you don't need to do that. What I have will do nicely."

Penny had just grinned broadly at me, gave a small chuckle and told me, "I know I don't. I want to. I've never seen Dr. Wackadoodle so worried about someone in my life. I think he deserves seeing you as the angel you truly are."

What could I say? I had merely smiled at her and silently sent up a prayer of thanks that I had such a good friend, and such a wonderful boyfriend, also.

I had capitulated with, "Okay, I'll let you do that. But don't get anything too risqué, okay? I am still in a hospital and I don't want to show too much skin."

At that point, Penny had done a fairly good imitation of one of Sheldon's classic eye rolls, "Sweetie, if they were worried about that they wouldn't have people wear those ridiculous hospital gowns. Leave all this to me. I have the perfect nightie set in mind. I saw it a couple weeks ago at Victoria's Secret. Don't go anywhere, Ames. Okay? I'll try to be back in a couple of hours."

As Penny left the room I suddenly realized I hadn't answered Sheldon's question as to which of the monkeys had bit me. I sincerely hoped he hadn't pinned the blame on Solomon. My previous joy was then replaced by worry. Solomon had been the one who called for help. I didn't want him to be in any sort of trouble. I knew when Sheldon returned I had to tell him then entire story of what had gone down that morning in the lab.

When Sheldon had finally returned with my journals and my food I motioned for him to take a seat next to my bed. I put the sushi aside for the moment, inhaled deeply and began to speak, "Sheldon, after you left I realized that I had failed to answer your question regarding which of my monkeys had bitten me. So, do I have your permission to related the story of that morning in its entirety to you?"

He had simply nodded as he took one of my hands in one of his. "Very well, I'll begin. I was feeding the monkeys their morning meal and I, as I usually do, let Solomon out of his cage. You know very well, yourself, that he is both very kind and trustworthy. Well, now I must add intelligent to that list."

Sheldon's head had cocked inquisitively and he asked me, "Why is that?"

I had squeezed his hand and then removed mine from it. I fluffed up my pillow and continued speaking, "Let me continue, please, I will get to that part soon, and I do believe I will not have to bother with an explanation." At that point, Sheldon nodded once more and I carried on with my tale, "Solomon is always very amusing and I love to watch his antics when he is out of his cage. He is always brightening my day with something or other he is doing. He knows I call you to set up our lunch date every morning, so on that day he saw my phone lying on my lab table and tried to hand it to me. He made that face he always makes when he is thinking of you."

Once again, Sheldon's face formed a question mark and he asked another question, "I'm confused here, Amy. What face does he make?"

I gave a little chuckle and explained to him, "He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms across his chest."

Sheldon sat bolt upright and replied indignantly, "Why on earth would he do that?"

I merely gave him a smile and a wink and continued, "You don't look in a mirror very often, do you? Anyway, I turned my head for just a second to both watch him and tell him to put down the phone. While my head was turned, Benard took advantage of the situation reached through the bars of his cage, grabbed my hand, and bit the side of it. It wasn't a very deep bite and it wasn't bleeding severely, so I chose to clean out the wound and carry on with my work."

Sheldon had shaken his head and castigated me with, "That wasn't the most intelligent decision you have ever made, Amy."

I had to agree with him there, so then it was my turn to nod and say, "Tell me about it. So, to continue my story, after a bit of time had passed I began to feel feverish. Again, I chose to ignore this and work through it. I failed to tie the bite in with my high body temperature. Another failing on my part. I was keeping up with my work fairly well and was actually thinking of calling you and canceling lunch. I didn't want you to catch whatever it was I thought I had. You know how you hate getting sick."

His response had been immediate and to the point, "You know me so well. That would have been a good call on your part."

I then picked up my story where I left off, "Yes. Well that was my plan, but suddenly the room began to spin wildly and I thought it best to get closer to the floor before I fell down. I gently lowered myself down to my knees and then I collapsed on my back. I vaguely remember looking up at Solomon, who was still on top of the table. I saw that, once again, he had my phone in his hands. What happened after that I have no recollection at all. I assume Solomon called you?"

Sheldon had winced and replied, "Yes. All I heard was the most god awful screeching sound."

I then felt compelled to explain Solomon's vocalization to Sheldon, "That's the sound he makes when he is scared. What happened to me must have been terrifying to him."

Sheldon then related to me what had happened on his end after Solomon's call, "I would imagine so. He wouldn't stop screaming at me, so I left for your office to find out what was going on."

I nodded solemnly, realizing it had been both of them who had aided me, "So between you and Solomon, you two saved my life."

Sheldon had given me a playful grin and replied, "I do believe it was mostly him, but I am most happy to share in the glory."

Concern for Solomon then filled my thoughts and I asked Sheldon, "Where is he now?"

He had shrugged and told me, "I imagine he's back safe and sound in his cage. The university took all of the monkeys to be tested for Herpes B. I told them that it was mostly macaque monkeys who carried Herpes B, but it also appears from time to time in rhesus monkeys. Are any of your subjects either macaques or rhesus monkeys?"

I had thought for a moment and then answered him with, "I have no rhesus monkeys. Most of my little guys are either capuchin or spider monkeys, I have only one Cercopithecinae in my lab, and that would be Benard."

Sheldon started to speak, but I interrupted him, "Well, if it was him that bit you…""

"I know for a fact it was. I turned to him as he was dropping my hand. Sorry for cutting you off like that."

Sheldon had given a deep sigh and explained to me what had happened to Solomon and the rest of them, "Well, they are testing them all, anyway. I told them it was more than likely Benard, but hey, I'm just a physicist, not a biologist, so they didn't listen to me."

I had looked up at Sheldon, amazed he had taken offense to what I thought was a completely rational response by the school, "Well, they are entirely different disciplines. I find it highly unlikely you would spend your time studying living things. Your focus is on the remnants of long dead stars and harnessing and explaining the energies thereof. The university most likely assumed you knew little of the animal kingdom."

Sheldon then drew himself up proudly and sniffed, "Which as you know, is far from the truth."

I nodded and had attempted to both placate him and explain Cal Tech's actions in the matter, "Of course, but we must agree that you are not as well versed in the scientific study of primates as we in the biology department are. The majority of your research rests on pure speculation, mine is centered on facts."

His eyes had gone wide and he spat out, "Excuse me? We have put men in space, we know for a certainty that the stars and planets exist.:"

I had failed to understand that avenue of reasoning. Sheldon did not study either stars or planets, he mostly studied dark matter and what made the universe run. He never studied concrete things, so I asked him pointedly, "What is your title at the university again?"

His good mood had been restored for the moment and he replied proudly, "I'm the Head Theoretical Physicist."

I had nodded and continued, "Yes, theoretical. Your work concentrates on what _might_ be. Mine concentrates on what _is._ Ergo, my studies are far more viable than yours."

Sheldon stood up in a rage and demanded, "You take that back!"

I had refused to back down just because His Highness was upset, "Why should I? It's the truth and you know it. Your research is rather a study in fantasy, is it not? In reality, I find it rather cute."

Then his explosion was total, "Cute? You find studying the universe and how it works 'cute'?"

I had nodded calmly, no sense in two of us acting like toddlers denied a toy, "Yes. That's exactly what I said. I didn't stutter."

Sheldon's eyes narrowed as he then announced, "I do believe this conversation has come to an end."

What could I say? I was tired of the whole thing myself. I responded with a simple, "Agreed."

Sheldon had turned and began to head for the door, "I shall be leaving you now."

I couldn't help myself, I had waved and called out a cherry, "Take care. And thank you for helping save my life."

Before he stomped out, he had responded with an angry, "It's nothing that a monkey couldn't have done."

The conversation had begun to get out of hand. So, I attempted to calm things down with, "Perhaps your correct, but thank you all the same." I was wrong. That did not help matters any, at all.

Sheldon had opened the door, thrown a quick look back and me and said, "Good day, Amy Farrah Fowler."

I had swiftly answered back with, "Good day, Sheldon Lee Cooper."

With that, Sheldon stormed out of the room and I suddenly realized I was alone once more. Tears began to form in my eyes, but receded the second I heard a happy voice exclaim, "I'm back, Ames. Look what I brought you!"

 **Will Sheldon and Amy make up? Will Penny be able to cheer Amy up? And what kind of sexy nightie did Penny buy for her friend? All will be answered soon.**


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29: The Stand In

 **Penny had bounded into my room after shouting out her greeting.** She put down a Victoria's Secret shopping bag and looked around the room. When she saw the sushi and the magazines laying on my tray, a quizzical look had come over her face and she asked me, "I see traces of Sheldon, but where is the genuine article? Is he in the bathroom?"

I had shaken my head sadly as a reply. I hadn't been really capable of explaining everything at that time.

She then looked even more confused and asked me, "Then where is he? Wait, did you two have a fight or something?"

Again, I merely nodded my head.

She was at the same time both impatient and concerned, "Okay, shoot. What was it about?"

I had shrugged as if I hadn't a clue and told her, "I don't really know. I suppose we ended up insulting each other's professions."

A faint light of understanding appeared behind her pretty green eyes and she probed me further, "Ooookay. What did you say to each other that was insulting? As much as you can remember, anyway." She added with a grin.

I began to admit my transgression in an offhand manner, "I suppose I suggested to him that biologists considered physicists as kind of uninformed about living things."

Penny's grin then grew even wider, "Like monkeys?"

I had nodded, almost feeling relief at my partial confession, "Exactly. Anyway, I'm always honest with Sheldon and I told him that my colleagues most likely considered his area of study when he offered his help and they kind of talked down to him."

She protested that statement loudly, "But Sheldon knows a whole hell of a lot about a lot of things!" To which she had wearily added, "Which he brings up at every available opportunity."

At that point, I decided to confess everything, "I know. But they don't know him as well as we do. The gist of it all is I rather agreed that I didn't think his studies were as important to the human race as mine."

Penny had actually winced at that and cried, "Oohh burn! I can see why he was upset. Until you came along, Sheldon's main passion was his work. Besides comic books and science fiction, that is. He really sees his job as a huge part of who he is."

I then shook my head despondently. The gravity of what I had done was becoming ever clearer to me, "Oh dear. I guess he thinks I was trying to emasculate him."

Penny's face had screwed up a bit in confusion at the unknown word and she quickly asked me, "Say what?"

I wracked my sore brain in an attempt to find words she would understand and finally told her, "Uh, Sheldon thought I was trying to make him feel like less of a man."

At that, her head had nodded in complete understanding, "Yeah, that sounds about right. Men are touchy about that kind of stuff."

I felt absolutely awful and contrite and I needed her help. So, I continued our conversation with, "Okay. I hurt his feelings. And I'm truly sorry. But what do I do? How can I make that up to him?"

Penny had looked at me as if I were totally clueless about men, which wasn't far from the truth, and responded with, "With whatever it takes. It isn't every man who saves his girlfriend who is lying on the floor unconscious and then refuses to leave her side for five days."

I then decided that the best thing to do was to cover my face with my hands and tell her, "I think I now feel worse instead of better. So what can I do?"

Penney had looked at me as if I were the most ignorant fool on the planet and replied to me with, "How about apologizing?"

I dropped my hands and had looked up at her, despair written all over my face, "You know Sheldon. If I do that, he'll never let me off the hook. He'll use it as a way to keep the upper hand. At least for a little while."

"Probably longer than that. Let's think." Penny then snapped her fingers, "I've got it!"

I looked up at her hopefully, "What?"

"We're going to put that on you," she had told me, pointing to the shopping bag on the floor, "and then let him see you in it. Men are such visual creatures."

I had suddenly felt compelled to ask her for more details, "Okay, Penny. How are we going to get him here? I would hope this plan is less rigorous than the one for when we were kidnapped."

At my question, Penny had tapped her chin with one of her forefingers and said, "Let me think for a little bit." She once again directed her gaze to the bag on the floor, "But first, let's get this thing on you and do your makeup like Sheldon would like it."

I was confused, I had reasoned that she knew Sheldon better than I did. That part of the plan convinced me that she didn't, "That would mean no makeup at all, Penny. He always says he likes me in no makeup."

Penny bent over to pick up the bag and responded with the wise words, "What a man says and what he means are often two very different things. He doesn't want you to wear makeup because he doesn't want any other man to come sniffing around." Her face had lit up like an incandescent bulb at that moment. "That's it! My plan is now complete."

My worried mind had felt compelled to remind her, "As I said before, I do hope it's less arduous than your plan when we were in that train depot."

She then waved off all of my concerns with a lighthearted, "Hell, yeah. That was work. This will be fun. Now, what do you think will get the Wackadoodle to come back here?"

My mind went into overdrive and I then came up with an amazing idea that Sheldon would not be able to resist. "What if they needed a written statement from him? He loves to do that kind of thing."

Penny dropped the bag and shook her head at me, "But that's not the truth, Ames."

"Of course not. But look where the truth got me. You, bestie, will text him that a hospital administrator is in my room asking for just that very thing. Sheldon will come running, laptop in hand." I had hastily added, "Along with his notary stamp."

The smile on her face had grown as she had given some thought to my idea, "And he will see you all dolled up. Now, we just have to get a good looking hunk to be drooling over you. Do you know any?"

I had laughed aloud at that little pronouncement, "Penny, do I look like the kind of girl who has hunks on speed dial? Let's be real here. You might have some, but I sure don't."

"Hmmmm. Yeah, I can see that. You're dating Sheldon Cooper for god's sake." She had thought a bit more and then crowed, "Oh wow! I've thought of the perfect guy. Tall, built, good looking, and none too bright."

I grinned at her and teased a little, "Well, that doesn't sound like Leonard at all."

She had chuckled right back at me and continued to explain, "No, but it sounds exactly like my ex, Zack."

"Would he do it?" I asked with a hoping against hope catch in my voice.

In answer to my question, Penny had begun to rub her hands together gleefully, "Sure. We're still friends. I can't explain it to him in too many details, he'd get confused. I'll just give him the basics and let him run with it. You'll see. This will be great!"

 **Meanwhile, back in Sheldon's head…**

 **When I had stormed out of Amy's room, only one thought had been repeating itself in my head, "She has no respect for either me or the work that I do."** I must be honest here, Amy's actions had cut me to the bone. I had thought of nothing for almost a week but her recovery. I had slept, eaten, and worked by her side for five days and how had she thanked me? By insulting me. Amy had never denigrated my work before. While her area of study was not physics, she had always shown at least a modicum of admiration for what I was researching. True, neurobiology had more practical implications for the world at large, but my work, if successful, would unlock the mysteries of the entire universe! How could she not have seen that?

It was then that the puzzle pieces began to fall into place. She couldn't see it because the poor woman had been in a coma for five days while running a high fever. Instead of being thankful that she had survived, what had I done? I'd picked a fight over some petty semantics and now we were both miserable. I knew I had always had a self-centered side to my personality, but this time I had carried it way too far. Guilt overtook me and I realized what I had to do. I had to return to my Amy's side and apologize for my abhorrent behavior.

With that thought, I turned on my heels and made my way back to the hospital. All I wanted was to take Amy in my arms and tell her how sorry I was for my thoughtless behavior. I had to put things right between us. I had realized that Amy had been speaking about her colleagues and attempting to explain their behavior to me. She hadn't really meant that my work lacked importance. I had willed the bus to quicken its pace, anxious to get back to Amy's side and feel the warmth of her strong, faithful love once more.

When the bus finally made its scheduled stop in front of the hospital, I bounded off of it and ran up to the front doors and through the lobby. I couldn't wait to see Amy and explain that I had been wrong. I had also wanted to see her smile once more with the smile she reserved just for me and me alone. I repeatedly pushed the elevator button, urging it to arrive and take me up to see my Amy. When the doors opened, I pushed the button for the fifth floor and impatiently tapped my foot. Would the wretched conveyance ever get me to her room? Finally, the doors opened once more and I bounded down the hall to room 517. Out of breath, I opened the door to her room…and froze. Dear Lord, was that Amy sitting there in a negligee and wearing way too much makeup? And who was that strange man sitting next to her and flirting? What had happened to my sweet Amy? I hastily backed out of the room and heard a voice from down the hall hail me, "Sheldon, it's about time you got here!" I never turned around. I just kept running down the hall and into the stairwell, my heart too hurt to wait for the elevator.

I began to castigate myself severely. What a fool I had been, thinking Amy must have been as upset as I was! Well, the scenario in her room had proven that theory false. I would never have pegged Amy for a floozy, but I suppose I had been wrong with that thinking. I had only been gone a couple of hours and she had already moved someone else into the chair I had been sitting in for five, torturous days and nights! The question now became, what next? I had little to no experience with broken romantic relationships before Amy and I was lost on how to deal with this particular form of treason. Suddenly, an idea came to me. I would call Penny. She was very experienced in the ending of relationships. How many men had I seen coming in and out of her door before she had settled on Leonard? Too many. That was why I thought her the perfect choice for breaking up advice. With that thought in mind, I pulled out my phone and placed an emergency call to the one person who could get me out of this mess.

 **I had been sitting up in my bed chatting with Zach and enjoying myself a bit.** He was, as Penny had so clearly specified, a good looking, good natured, but brainless hunk. While I pretended to enjoy his attentions, my mind was far away. Zach may have been good looking, but he held my interest not at all. The man lacked any form a brain power at all and I was used to conversing with a man whose brain could have qualified for the Intelligence Olympics in weightlifting. I found Zack very handsome, but extremely boring and I couldn't wait for Sheldon to find us together and then fight for my hand. I would then tell him how sorry I was for the mean things I had said and everything would go back to normal.

As Zack had droned on, I had reached up to scratch my shoulder. The skimpy green nightie with the black lace trim might have been screamed sex to most people, but to me, it screamed uncomfortable. It scratched and irritated me in ways my trusted flannels never had. How I had longed for their comfort and modesty. The slinky piece of material I was wearing, I could never call nightclothes. I had wondered to myself how on earth women ever managed to sleep in those things? I was sure they were removed before any actual sleep occurred, and not for the reason most people would think. How could a woman get in the mood while wearing one of these scratchy, binding things?

My phone had suddenly rung and I answered it, expecting Penny to be on the line telling me that Sheldon was on his way. It had been Penny, all right. But she didn't speak of Sheldon's imminent arrival. Instead, I heard her strained voice tell me, "Houston, we have a problem."

 **Oh boy. What now? Penny's plan didn't work so well this time, did it?**

Chapter 29: The Stand In

 **Penny had bounded into my room after shouting out her greeting.** She put down a Victoria's Secret shopping bag and looked around the room. When she saw the sushi and the magazines laying on my tray, a quizzical look had come over her face and she asked me, "I see traces of Sheldon, but where is the genuine article? Is he in the bathroom?"

I had shaken my head sadly as a reply. I hadn't been really capable of explaining everything at that time.

She then looked even more confused and asked me, "Then where is he? Wait, did you two have a fight or something?"

Again, I merely nodded my head.

She was at the same time both impatient and concerned, "Okay, shoot. What was it about?"

I had shrugged as if I hadn't a clue and told her, "I don't really know. I suppose we ended up insulting each other's professions."

A faint light of understanding appeared behind her pretty green eyes and she probed me further, "Ooookay. What did you say to each other that was insulting? As much as you can remember, anyway." She added with a grin.

I began to admit my transgression in an offhand manner, "I suppose I suggested to him that biologists considered physicists as kind of uninformed about living things."

Penny's grin then grew even wider, "Like monkeys?"

I had nodded, almost feeling relief at my partial confession, "Exactly. Anyway, I'm always honest with Sheldon and I told him that my colleagues most likely considered his area of study when he offered his help and they kind of talked down to him."

She protested that statement loudly, "But Sheldon knows a whole hell of a lot about a lot of things!" To which she had wearily added, "Which he brings up at every available opportunity."

At that point, I decided to confess everything, "I know. But they don't know him as well as we do. The gist of it all is I rather agreed that I didn't think his studies were as important to the human race as mine."

Penny had actually winced at that and cried, "Oohh burn! I can see why he was upset. Until you came along, Sheldon's main passion was his work. Besides comic books and science fiction, that is. He really sees his job as a huge part of who he is."

I then shook my head despondently. The gravity of what I had done was becoming ever clearer to me, "Oh dear. I guess he thinks I was trying to emasculate him."

Penny's face had screwed up a bit in confusion at the unknown word and she quickly asked me, "Say what?"

I wracked my sore brain in an attempt to find words she would understand and finally told her, "Uh, Sheldon thought I was trying to make him feel like less of a man."

At that, her head had nodded in complete understanding, "Yeah, that sounds about right. Men are touchy about that kind of stuff."

I felt absolutely awful and contrite and I needed her help. So, I continued our conversation with, "Okay. I hurt his feelings. And I'm truly sorry. But what do I do? How can I make that up to him?"

Penny had looked at me as if I were totally clueless about men, which wasn't far from the truth, and responded with, "With whatever it takes. It isn't every man who saves his girlfriend who is lying on the floor unconscious and then refuses to leave her side for five days."

I then decided that the best thing to do was to cover my face with my hands and tell her, "I think I now feel worse instead of better. So what can I do?"

Penney had looked at me as if I were the most ignorant fool on the planet and replied to me with, "How about apologizing?"

I dropped my hands and had looked up at her, despair written all over my face, "You know Sheldon. If I do that, he'll never let me off the hook. He'll use it as a way to keep the upper hand. At least for a little while."

"Probably longer than that. Let's think." Penny then snapped her fingers, "I've got it!"

I looked up at her hopefully, "What?"

"We're going to put that on you," she had told me, pointing to the shopping bag on the floor, "and then let him see you in it. Men are such visual creatures."

I had suddenly felt compelled to ask her for more details, "Okay, Penny. How are we going to get him here? I would hope this plan is less rigorous than the one for when we were kidnapped."

At my question, Penny had tapped her chin with one of her forefingers and said, "Let me think for a little bit." She once again directed her gaze to the bag on the floor, "But first, let's get this thing on you and do your makeup like Sheldon would like it."

I was confused, I had reasoned that she knew Sheldon better than I did. That part of the plan convinced me that she didn't, "That would mean no makeup at all, Penny. He always says he likes me in no makeup."

Penny bent over to pick up the bag and responded with the wise words, "What a man says and what he means are often two very different things. He doesn't want you to wear makeup because he doesn't want any other man to come sniffing around." Her face had lit up like an incandescent bulb at that moment. "That's it! My plan is now complete."

My worried mind had felt compelled to remind her, "As I said before, I do hope it's less arduous than your plan when we were in that train depot."

She then waved off all of my concerns with a lighthearted, "Hell, yeah. That was work. This will be fun. Now, what do you think will get the Wackadoodle to come back here?"

My mind went into overdrive and I then came up with an amazing idea that Sheldon would not be able to resist. "What if they needed a written statement from him? He loves to do that kind of thing."

Penny dropped the bag and shook her head at me, "But that's not the truth, Ames."

"Of course not. But look where the truth got me. You, bestie, will text him that a hospital administrator is in my room asking for just that very thing. Sheldon will come running, laptop in hand." I had hastily added, "Along with his notary stamp."

The smile on her face had grown as she had given some thought to my idea, "And he will see you all dolled up. Now, we just have to get a good looking hunk to be drooling over you. Do you know any?"

I had laughed aloud at that little pronouncement, "Penny, do I look like the kind of girl who has hunks on speed dial? Let's be real here. You might have some, but I sure don't."

"Hmmmm. Yeah, I can see that. You're dating Sheldon Cooper for god's sake." She had thought a bit more and then crowed, "Oh wow! I've thought of the perfect guy. Tall, built, good looking, and none too bright."

I grinned at her and teased a little, "Well, that doesn't sound like Leonard at all."

She had chuckled right back at me and continued to explain, "No, but it sounds exactly like my ex, Zack."

"Would he do it?" I asked with a hoping against hope catch in my voice.

In answer to my question, Penny had begun to rub her hands together gleefully, "Sure. We're still friends. I can't explain it to him in too many details, he'd get confused. I'll just give him the basics and let him run with it. You'll see. This will be great!"

 **Meanwhile, back in Sheldon's head…**

 **When I had stormed out of Amy's room, only one thought had been repeating itself in my head, "She has no respect for either me or the work that I do."** I must be honest here, Amy's actions had cut me to the bone. I had thought of nothing for almost a week but her recovery. I had slept, eaten, and worked by her side for five days and how had she thanked me? By insulting me. Amy had never denigrated my work before. While her area of study was not physics, she had always shown at least a modicum of admiration for what I was researching. True, neurobiology had more practical implications for the world at large, but my work, if successful, would unlock the mysteries of the entire universe! How could she not have seen that?

It was then that the puzzle pieces began to fall into place. She couldn't see it because the poor woman had been in a coma for five days while running a high fever. Instead of being thankful that she had survived, what had I done? I'd picked a fight over some petty semantics and now we were both miserable. I knew I had always had a self-centered side to my personality, but this time I had carried it way too far. Guilt overtook me and I realized what I had to do. I had to return to my Amy's side and apologize for my abhorrent behavior.

With that thought, I turned on my heels and made my way back to the hospital. All I wanted was to take Amy in my arms and tell her how sorry I was for my thoughtless behavior. I had to put things right between us. I had realized that Amy had been speaking about her colleagues and attempting to explain their behavior to me. She hadn't really meant that my work lacked importance. I had willed the bus to quicken its pace, anxious to get back to Amy's side and feel the warmth of her strong, faithful love once more.

When the bus finally made its scheduled stop in front of the hospital, I bounded off of it and ran up to the front doors and through the lobby. I couldn't wait to see Amy and explain that I had been wrong. I had also wanted to see her smile once more with the smile she reserved just for me and me alone. I repeatedly pushed the elevator button, urging it to arrive and take me up to see my Amy. When the doors opened, I pushed the button for the fifth floor and impatiently tapped my foot. Would the wretched conveyance ever get me to her room? Finally, the doors opened once more and I bounded down the hall to room 517. Out of breath, I opened the door to her room…and froze. Dear Lord, was that Amy sitting there in a negligee and wearing way too much makeup? And who was that strange man sitting next to her and flirting? What had happened to my sweet Amy? I hastily backed out of the room and heard a voice from down the hall hail me, "Sheldon, it's about time you got here!" I never turned around. I just kept running down the hall and into the stairwell, my heart too hurt to wait for the elevator.

I began to castigate myself severely. What a fool I had been, thinking Amy must have been as upset as I was! Well, the scenario in her room had proven that theory false. I would never have pegged Amy for a floozy, but I suppose I had been wrong with that thinking. I had only been gone a couple of hours and she had already moved someone else into the chair I had been sitting in for five, torturous days and nights! The question now became, what next? I had little to no experience with broken romantic relationships before Amy and I was lost on how to deal with this particular form of treason. Suddenly, an idea came to me. I would call Penny. She was very experienced in the ending of relationships. How many men had I seen coming in and out of her door before she had settled on Leonard? Too many. That was why I thought her the perfect choice for breaking up advice. With that thought in mind, I pulled out my phone and placed an emergency call to the one person who could get me out of this mess.

 **I had been sitting up in my bed chatting with Zach and enjoying myself a bit.** He was, as Penny had so clearly specified, a good looking, good natured, but brainless hunk. While I pretended to enjoy his attentions, my mind was far away. Zach may have been good looking, but he held my interest not at all. The man lacked any form a brain power at all and I was used to conversing with a man whose brain could have qualified for the Intelligence Olympics in weightlifting. I found Zack very handsome, but extremely boring and I couldn't wait for Sheldon to find us together and then fight for my hand. I would then tell him how sorry I was for the mean things I had said and everything would go back to normal.

As Zack had droned on, I had reached up to scratch my shoulder. The skimpy green nightie with the black lace trim might have been screamed sex to most people, but to me, it screamed uncomfortable. It scratched and irritated me in ways my trusted flannels never had. How I had longed for their comfort and modesty. The slinky piece of material I was wearing, I could never call nightclothes. I had wondered to myself how on earth women ever managed to sleep in those things? I was sure they were removed before any actual sleep occurred, and not for the reason most people would think. How could a woman get in the mood while wearing one of these scratchy, binding things?

My phone had suddenly rung and I answered it, expecting Penny to be on the line telling me that Sheldon was on his way. It had been Penny, all right. But she didn't speak of Sheldon's imminent arrival. Instead, I heard her strained voice tell me, "Houston, we have a problem."

 **Oh boy. What now? Penny's plan didn't work so well this time, did it?**


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30: Mea Culpa

 **Well,** **it's hit the fan.** **Let's see what happens next.**

I had immediately waved Zack out of my room and stared at the phone, almost afraid to ask the question, but I did. Our conversation had gone down something like this:

 _What sort of problem?_

 _Uh, well, Sheldon saw you in that negligee talking to Zack._

 _Good._ _Right?_ Radio silence. _Right?_ Crickets. _RIGHT?_

 _No, Amy._ _Bad._ _I think I figured wrong on this one._

 _What do you mean?_

 _Sheldon is super pissed._ _He thinks you were trying to seduce Zack._

 _That bonehead?_ _Oh my god._ _You told him it was all your idea…right?_ Once again, crickets _._ _RIGHT?_

 _I tried to, but he hung up on me when I told him to not be so hasty._ _I guess having Zack there wasn't such a good idea._

 _YOU GUESS?_ _Penny, you've just detonated my love life!_ _What did he say about writing the statement?_ _He was coming back for that, right?_

 _Wrong._ _He was coming back to apologize to you._

 _And he saw me in a negligee talking to Zack._

 _Well, yeah._

 _Oh god._ _I'm doomed._

 _Not so fast._ _I've got another idea._

 _No._ _N-O._ _Let me handle this._ _It seems I know Sheldon a bit better than you._ _Oh, you can come and get your crummy nightie._ _The thing is uncomfortable as hell._ _How do you sleep in these?_

 _Uh, Amy, sleep isn't the idea behind them._

 _I know that._ _But what about…after?_ _How do you sleep then?_

 _Sweetie, the thing comes off somewhere between foreplay and afterglow._ _You don't sleep in it._ _Really, Ames._ _Sometimes you surprise me._

 ** _I_** _surprise_ _ **you**_ _?_ _Now I've heard everything._

 _Amy, let me take care of this._

 _I think you've done enough._ _Please, no._

 _I'm not talking about me._ _I'll have Leonard talk to him._ _They're best friends._ _I know Leonard can help get this all straightened out._

I had thought that one over for a bit and then replied _, Okay._ _On one condition._

 _What's that?_

 _You come get this torture garment from me and bring me my flannels._

 _You sure you want those old things?_

 _Penny, I'm giving you fair warning._ _I want my old, comfy pajamas and robe and I want them today!_

 _Okay, okay._ _I'll go get them._ _I'll also tell Leonard to talk to Sheldon._ _Okay?_

At that, I was slightly mollified, so I had answered her in a much kinder voice _, Sure, Bestie._ _Hey, get me the blue ones._ _They're hanging at the front of my closet._ _You can't miss them._

 _I'll go right over to your place and get them._ _And Ames?_

 _Yes?_

 _I'm really, truly, sorry._ _I didn't mean for this to happen._

 _I know._ _But next time I say something's a bad idea, listen to me."_

 _Got it._ _Look, I leaving now and I'll be back at the hospital asap._ _'_ _Bye, Amy._

 _Goodbye, Penny._ I then ended the call and sat back in my bed, wondering how my usual boring life had gotten so complicated the last few months. Of course, the answer to that one had come quickly. I had met Sheldon Cooper.

 **After leaving the hospital and talking to Penny, I had decided to head back home.** I was already wearing my bus pants, so there would be no harm done by hopping on the soonest Metro bus and riding it back to the corner near our apartment. As I had been sitting there, waiting for the bus to arrive, my phone began to vibrated. I pulled it out of my pocket and looked at it. I had seen that it was a call from Leonard, so I answered it. Despite everything I had gone through that day, or maybe because of it, his voice acted like a balm on my injured soul.

 _Hey, buddy._ _How ya' doin'?_ _I hear you had quite a day today._

 _Leonard, I do not feel like discussing the events right now._

 _Sheldon, I have to tell you something._

 _What?_

 _What you saw a little while ago in Amy's room wasn't what you think it is._

 _Now you're confusing me._ _I know what I saw._ _Amy in a trashy-looking negligee talking to that imbecile, Zack._

 _Yeah, but there's more to the story._ _Have you ever known Amy to wear sheer, gaudy, lingeree?_

 _No, of course not._ _That fever must have destroyed some of her brain cells._

 _Not so._ _Think, Sheldon._ _You're supposed to be the smart one here._ _Who do you know that would talk Amy into wearing something like that and talking to a guy like Zack?_

 _Oh, dear lord!_ _Was this Penny's idea?_

 _Yep._ _The whole thing was Penny's concoction._ _Amy was upset over your fight, so Penny told her that the best way to get you back was to make you jealous._ _So she bought Amy that nightie and talked Zack into visiting her._

 _But how did she know I would return?_

 _Sheldon, check your phone._ _There should be a text there asking you to come back to the hospital and write a statement about Amy's case._

 _Let me see…oh yes, there it is._ _That must be why Penny used the words she did to me when I was leaving the hospital._ _Bu Zack?_ _Really?_ _That nightgown was bad enough, but him?_ _Why on earth did she think my reaction would be anything but what it was?_ _Penny actually thought I would go in there and 'mark my territory' or some other macho absurdity?_

 _Pretty much, yeah._

 _Leonard, I have an idea._ _Perhaps I was too hard on Amy._ _If a jealous boyfriend is what she wants, well, maybe I should give that to her._

 _You mean you want to go back and confront Zack?_

 _Leonard, that idea strongly appeals to the East Texas in me._ _Just like with Bert, I will do what I must to protect Amy's honor._

 _Just don't punch the guy this time, okay?_ _You were lucky you didn't get into worse trouble than you did for that._

 _This is where you can help me, Leonard._

 _How?_

 _I want you to call Zack and get him back in that room with Amy._ _Now, make sure that Zack is in on my little charade, or as much as his miniscule brain can comprehend that._ _I'll gamble on the chance that he can fathom playing a little trick on the girls._ _This will be good._

 _Do you want Penny to be there?_

 _Of course._ _But if I know those two, Penny is in her room right now, commiserating with her over how their little plan backfired on them._

 _Sheldon, this idea of yours is, indeed, devious._ _I like it._ _I'll call Zack now._ _I'll text you when he gets to the hospital._ _When he does, wait for about fifteen minutes and go up to Amy's room and 'fight for your woman'._

 _I will await your text before I make my move._ _Leonard?_

 _What, Sheldon?_

 _Thank you for being my friend._

 _Hey, in this case, it's us against them._

 _Agreed._ _I will call you later with the results._

 _I'll be here._ _Goodbye, buddy._

 _Goodbye, Leonard._

 **Before I knew it, Penny was back in my room smiling like the cat that had just swallowed the canary.** Okay, I must admit, her demeanor had spiked my curiosity and I asked her, "What are you smiling about, Bestie?"

She had answered without looking at me, "Oh, nothing. Hey, before you change into your flannels, can I ask you something?"

My suspicions had by then been put on full alert and I snapped at her, "What now?" I then realized she had spent the better part of her day trying to help me, even if it didn't work out as she had planned. I had felt incredibly guilty at my outburst and apologized to her, "Sorry, I've just had a bad day. Ask away."

Penny grinned and looked a bit mysterious, "What would you say about Zack coming back here?"

I had shaken my head resolutely and responded, "No way. We had no connection, whatsoever. It would be a waste of time for both of us."

Penny then confessed something that raised the hair on the back of my neck, "Oh, well I ran into him outside and invited him in. Sorry."

"You what? Oh, hi Zack."

"Penny told me you were having a bad day and I thought I could cheer you up."

"That's very nice of you, Zack. But I think a little alone time would be best for me right now."

I was going to say more, but Penny interrupted me, "Nonsense. Zack came here to cheer you up and that's what he and I are going to do, cheer you up."

I had begun to get angry and replied, "How? I'm stuck in the hospital, I'm wearing a very uncomfortable piece of nightwear, and I just broke up with my boyfriend. How are you two proposing to cheer me up?"

Zack began to explain in an uncertain voice, "Well, Penny and I could…"

At that moment, the door flew open and Sheldon marched into my room, breathing fire.

"Excuse me, Zack. Just what are you doing here talking to _my_ girlfriend?"

Zack had actually looked excited at Sheldon's arrival, "Hey, it's one of the science dudes! I didn't know Amy was your girlfriend."

Sheldon had muttered to himself, "Among most other common forms of knowledge." He continued out loud with, "Penny didn't tell you? Amy said nothing?"

Zack then cheerfully began his rehearsed (unknown to me at the time) explanation, "Look, Penny asked me to come over and try to cheer up her friend. Penny and I go way back. I thought you knew that. Anyway, I came over here as a favor to Penny. Then, Amy and I started talking and I thought she was pretty cool."

Sheldon had crossed his arms over his chest and demanded, "And just what did you two talk about?"

Zack had been quick to enthusiastically answer him, "Science stuff. Like I talk about with you guys. She knows a lot of cool stuff."

Sheldon looked over at Zack and addressed him in a somewhat condescending tone, "Yes, science is full of 'cool stuff'. Well, you can leave now. I am Amy's boyfriend and it's my obligation to cheer her up, not yours."

I had seen Penny actually wince at his words and she had been quick to reprimand him, "Sheldon, is that how you refer to your girlfriend, as an obligation?"

"Of course. She is my most delightful obligation and I value every minute of our time together." He had then turned to me and spoke from the heart, "Amy, I am so sorry I ran out before without coming to you for an explanation. Could you two," he then pointed to Penny and Zack, "leave us alone for a minute?"

Zack grinned and made no move for the door, "Sure, science dude. Hey, when I come back, maybe we could all sit here and talk science stuff."

At that, Penny had begun to push him out the door from behind, "Or not. Zack, I think we should leave them alone for a little while. You can always come with me to my house. Leonard and Raj are there and would love to talk science with you."

At that, he had allowed himself to be propelled through the door, "Cool! Well, I'll see you guys later. 'Bye, Amy. It was nice talking to you."

"Goodbye Zack. Have fun at Penny's home." With that, they were gone and Sheldon and I had been left alone to try and put our relationship back together.

 **Do you think Sheldon and Amy can patch things up?** **If so, how?** **The next chapter has some surprises in it as to how they do just that.**


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Clearing the Air

 **After Zack and I had executed our plan to perfection, I settled myself into the chair recently vacated by him.** I then looked at Amy, cleared my throat, and began to speak. "Amy, it seems that ever since we have known each other, you seem to find yourself in some sort of trouble when I am not by your side.

Amy had immediately looked up at me with more than a little trepidation. It seemed like she didn't know where I was going with that reasoning. Perhaps she thought it sounded like I was calling her incompetent, because she protested, "I wouldn't go that far, Sheldon. Sometimes, yes. But not that often."

I had found it difficult to believe what she had just told me, so I challenged her with, "Oh no? Please allow me to refresh your memory. First, you were accosted by a drug-addled Bert. Then, you, Penny, and Bernadette were kidnapped by Kripke and company. After that, you were bitten by one of your research subjects and ended up in a coma with encephalitis. Finally, and this may be the worst of all, you were forced to lay there in uncomfortable nightwear and attempt to have an intelligent conversation with Zack Johnson. Really woman, you need me there by your side constantly to keep you out of harm's way."

Judging by her reaction to my words, it seemed Amy had been getting frustrated at my train of thought and began to defend herself, "Sheldon, I'm a grown woman. I like to think of those events as more as isolated incidences. Before I met you, my life was, for the most part, extremely uneventful. Perhaps _you_ were the catalyst of at least a couple of those personal disasters. What do you think?"

Those words had truly rocked me and I barely managed to reply, "So you're asking me to exit your life?"

I must have missed the point entirely, because Amy had answered me in the kindest, most loving voice I had ever heard, "Of course not. Let me make this as clear as possible; I don't like safe and boring any longer. While if I never get kidnapped or fall into a coma again I will be very happy, you have changed my life very much for the better, Sheldon Cooper. You have brought friendship, love, companionship, and a sense of adventure into my life. Why would I want that to end? Sheldon, the furthest thing from my mind is asking you to leave me."

I hadn't been completely convinced, I still had my doubts so I responded with, "You're sure of that?"

A beautiful smile filled her face as she had assured me, "I couldn't be more sure of it, Sheldon."

At that, I reached into my pants pocket and retrieved the ring I had never bothered to return to the drawer in my desk at home. "As long as you are sure of that, I am now asking you to make good on your words." Believe it or not, I actually got down on one knee next to her bed. I was wearing my bus pants, so I was not too concerned about the germs on the floor. I then proceeded at ask her, "Amy Farrah Fowler, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife and spending the rest of your life with me? I know this is an awkward time and place…" I never got the rest of the words out of my mouth as Amy wrapped her arms around me and gave me a resounding…

"YES!"

I had somehow managed to put the ring on her finger and continue my proposal, "I know we haven't known each other for a long time, but we have been through so much in a short amount of time. I do know I love you. I have never loved anyone outside of my family before, so this feeling is very, very, special to me. I know for certain I want to spend the rest of my life with you and judging from the enthusiastic response you just gave me, I do believe you feel the same way towards me."

Amy wiped a happy tear from her eye and told me, "Sheldon, this was not exactly how I had envisioned getting proposed to, but I'll take it. When all is said and done, it's not the setting of the proposal that is the most important, it is the feeling behind it. Everything considered, this has been the most special day of my life."

I then decided to tease her a little, "Why exactly? Is it because you finally awoke from your coma? Or that you and Penny bonded further. Or…"

She threw me a slightly exasperated look, jumped out of her hospital bed, and wrapped her arms around me as she countered my teasing with, "Sheldon Cooper, you know exactly why today is special to me. The most wonderful man in the world just asked me to marry him!"

After I had kissed her for a very long time, my logical side returned and I continued with, "And as soon as your doctors see fit to discharge you, we will start making wedding plans. But for now, I do believe it is proper social etiquette to inform both of our families and all of our friends. Am I correct?"

Amy had nodded at me happily, "Yes, Sheldon. That is correct." And with that, we both pulled out our respective phones and began to announce our pending nuptials to the people most important to us.

 **So, that is the backstory of how I have come to be sitting in Howard Wolowitz's living room, dressed in a lovely white dress that makes me feel like a princess.** Penny had done her penance for the Zack debacle by offering to plan our entire wedding for us. Sheldon had been doubtful, but when he called me this morning his first words to me were, "You will not believe how Penny has decorated Howard's backyard! It is magnificent! Also, she has put out an amazing buffet table for our guests to enjoy both before and after the ceremony. Amy, I suppose I don't sound romantic very often, but today is going to be the happiest day of my life."

What could I say? Tears threatened to ruin the beautiful makeup job that Penny was applying to me face as I assured him, "Mine too, Sheldon. Mine too."

You see, I took on the job of treating Sheldon Cooper for the money, but I got so much more. The moral of this little tale is this: Never be afraid to shake up your life and get out of your routine. I suppose I did that to the extreme, but the rewards will be with me for a lifetime. Now, if you'll kindly excuse me, I hear the processional music playing and Penny has just handed me my bouquet. It's almost time for me to become Mrs. Sheldon Cooper. I know it's trite, but I have to say in this situation, All's Well That Ends Well seems to fit very well. Don't you agree?


End file.
